Soothing His Madness

by Kayn, Debra

  Anger heated him at the same time pride for his boy kicked his ass. What the hell? Hadn't he always taken care of his family? All because he'd done the right thing and let the courts decide the fate of his family, he'd failed. Of course, Kurt thought he could do better by taking Ray on himself. He probably didn't want his dad to fuck up again.

  "Check yourself." Raul laid his hand on Slade's shoulder. "Your boy's fine. You have a gorgeous woman at your back, and your family is safe. Another day, you can fight the devil inside of you."

  "Right." Slade concentrated on where to go and what to do now. "I'll take Kurt back to the bar. The walk will do us both good."

  Raul nodded, and returned to his motorcycle. He winked at Kurt and smiled at Taylor, then rode back in the direction of Cactus Cove.

  Slade stood, unsure what to do or say. Kurt's actions could've got him hurt or worse, killed. Growing up wasn't the same as when he was a kid. His dad drove long hauls in the truck and was never home. His mom drank herself to death. He'd raised himself, and did what he wanted. Today, he had to protect, shelter, and raise his son in not only a broken home, but in a world that was selfish and cruel.

  Taylor held out her hand. "Let's get back. Lee's probably wondering where we disappeared."

  He walked over, took her hand, threw his arm around Kurt's shoulder, and for once was glad when his son let him keep it there. Each step grew lighter. He mussed Kurt's hair, glad to have him back.

  Taylor walked silently with them, squeezing his hand every few steps and he was thankful for the reminder that she wasn't going anywhere. He gazed ahead and broke the silence. "A man's judged by his actions, son. Occasionally, you'll screw up big time and it seems all is lost and no one's ever going to trust you again. But, by changing the way you react, you prove again and again that you're a man to be trusted. I've messed up a lot of times at your age and even as an adult, more times than I can count. Probably didn't handle your mom right and that got me in trouble, but I'll prove to you that you can trust me."

  "Dad, I—"

  "Not done." He glanced at Kurt. "You've stepped up and became a man when you should be a kid. You've watched your brother and put your own needs to the side, and that grates on me. It puts scars on my back. I understand you wanting to shoulder the responsibility of this family, but it's not your job. That's my job, and one way I'll respect your choices, your actions, is if you include me in your decisions. You see Ray or hear from him, you tell me and I'll deal with him. Not you. Do you understand me?"

  "Yeah." Kurt hopped up onto the sidewalk in front of Cactus Cove. "Sorry."

  "I'm sorry too, son. Maybe it's time for all of us to make the right choices, huh?" He put his hand on the front door of the bar, waiting for Kurt's answer.

  Kurt sheepishly looked at Taylor, who'd remained quiet during the talk, then gazed back up at Slade. "Okay."

  He held his fist up and Kurt knuckle bumped him. Then he opened the door. Kurt scrambled inside under his arm, and Taylor slipped her hand into his back pocket and followed him inside.

  He let the door close, focused once again on his woman. "You okay?"

  "I will be eventually when my heart stops racing and I can take a deep breath." She rose up on her tiptoes and kissed his lips, softening her mouth and he tasted the warmth of her. She sighed and rocked back on her heels. "You're an awesome dad. I just wanted you to know that."

  "Trying to be, but have a long way to go." He caressed her cheek with his thumb. "He scared the hell out of me. First Kurt, then you. I saw you fighting with Bruce, and all I wanted to do is throw you back inside."

  "I was scared. I thought I knew where you could find Kurt and the thought of him walking past the hotel…" She leaned her head into his palm and closed her eyes. "Everything is okay though. He's safe. We're all safe."

  "Remember, if I'm not around, the clubs here for you. You need to rely on them to help you. Bruce would've found me," he said.

  "I only want you though." She opened her eyes and gazed up at him. "Are you okay with hearing Ray came here?"

  "I need to take care of that motherfucker and find out what he was doing here." He tightened his lips over his teeth. "I swear, he's going to step too close and I don't know if I can stop from killing him. Even Jodie…useless bitch, was more upset that I woke her up than she was about finding Kurt."

  Taylor's lips pursed. He hooked her neck. Another time and place, and he'd show her how much he appreciated her supporting him. She understood his position, and instead of calling his ex-wife out, she fought to keep her opinion to herself. Taylor was more concerned about Kurt than Jodie exhibited toward her own son's disappearance.

  "Let's go in and settle down, check on the kids," he said.

  Inside, the boys were eating an ice cream sundae and entertaining the younger children. Slade sat down in the nearest chair and pulled Taylor down on his lap. Only then did he give in to the stress. His legs shook. Taylor put her hands on his thighs, leaned her shoulder against his chest, and absorbed his anger.

  Even though he settled and enjoyed Taylor's heat calming him down, he couldn't wrap his head around the turmoil in his life. Ray couldn't keep showing up in his life every few days. Slade was out of money to buy himself more time with his kids. His boys were done with having their lives interrupted, and the only thing he could think of to turn his life around was to get rid of Ray.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Sunday night, three days into the lockdown, the call went out to all Bantorus members that Los Li were making their move. Taylor stood in the hallway in front of the door to the spare room at Cactus Cove, where Tori had all the kids entertained and away from any talk happening in the bar, and studied Slade. She wasn't planning on anyone getting past her.

  Of course, Los Li members would have to get past the Bantorus members outside and then the men stationed inside the building too, before even seeing her standing guard in front of the door. Call her crazy, but she had a new family to protect and nothing in her control was going to touch them anymore.

  Slade slid an extra clip for his pistol in his back pocket. She eyed the tension in his body, and wished she could take it all away. Staying inside the club during the day and in the cabin at night gave her no privacy to ease his strain of the last couple of days.

  "No matter what, you stay inside." Slade hooked her neck, bringing her off the door and to his body. "When this is over, we can go home. I need to know I'm taking my whole family with me."

  "You will." She kissed him hard. "Don't do anything stupid."

  "Me?" He grinned, and she saw through his attempt at easing the stress of the situation for what it was. His eyes remained dark and intense. "Baby…"

  "It'll be fine. You've taken care of your kids, your club, and your town many times before in situations like this. Today is no different." She pushed him away. "Besides, if they mess with you, you'll shoot them in the knees."

  His body hardened and he frowned. She rolled her eyes. "I'm joking. Go. I want to sleep in your creaky old bed tonight and have a break from this place before I'm scheduled to come back and work."

  He leaned toward her, kissed her hard again, and walked away. Alone in the hallway, she leaned against the door and let herself slide to the floor until she sat on her ass. Lack of sleep, stress, and not eating right had taken its toll. She was weak and on the verge of bawling her head off.

  Her loyalty went with Slade, the kids, her job, and even the club because everyone had become a huge part of her life, but enough was enough. Was she supposed to ignore Slade had an ex-wife that invaded their spare time, stand back when his kids needed help, and obey Slade every time he snapped his fingers?

  All she wanted to do was have a normal life with the man she loved and so far, she still hadn't seen anything resembling a normal relationship. She rubbed the back of her neck. Only a few more hours and hopefully one threat to their happiness would be over.

  Bruce entered the hallway and sat down beside her. He nudged her with his arm. She l
eaned against him. They'd been friends and coworkers for over four years.

  "Slade made you come and protect me didn't he?" she said.

  Bruce chuckled. "How'd you know?"

  "Because that's the type of man he is." She straightened. "I've watched him for years and then he knocked on my door one night. He never asked to come in my house like a normal person. He just walked in as if he owned the place…and owned me. I don't think I've told anyone that before. Weird, huh?"

  Bruce sat with her, not saying a word. She remained confused. At almost thirty years old, she should know what kind of relationship she wanted. She'd dated all kinds of men, from business owners to bus drivers to ones who lived off an unemployment check. In her line of work, she was around bikers all the time, she understood them, or so she'd thought.

  "Do you think a woman can be happy when so much of her life is out of her hands? I mean, it's sick to enjoy the chaos and believe someone will always bail you out and protect you, right?" she asked.

  "You enjoy lockdown and having Slade dogging your tail?" Bruce shook his head. "Women. I don't understand a damn one of you. You want your independence, you want coddled, you want it all and how are we supposed to figure it out?"

  She frowned. "Honestly? I don't know."

  Bruce laughed, filling the empty hallway with amusement. Warmth crawled up her neck. Even she couldn't understand what she wanted out of a relationship. How was she supposed to discuss her feeling with Slade?

  He'd look at her as if she was crazy, have sex with her, and call it good. He solved all her little upsets with sex, which wasn't bad, in fact it was hot, but someday soon, she'd have to figure out what their relationship meant past the next stressful situation that came their way and shook them up.

  "Are we going to sit in the hallway for the rest of the night or do you want to go in the bar and sit with the other women?" Bruce shifted onto his hip and stretched his leg.

  "I'm staying here. Tori's got the kids settled in the room, and the older ones are watching a DVD on television." She stood and held out her hand. "Stretch your legs."

  Bruce heaved himself to his feet and a blast, followed by several gunshots, rocked the building. Bruce pushed her back down to the floor. She grabbed his arm. "Slade?"

  He shook his head, kneeling over her. "I'm covering you. Slade can take care of himself."

  "What about the children?" She pushed at him to sit up.

  Before she got the answer she was looking for, babies cried and another blast drowned out all sounds. She pushed against Bruce again, but he wasn't budging. "Let me up. I can help Tori with the kids."

  "That door is not coming open. Tori's armed and Rain told her to shoot anything that comes through that door, and she will. The kids are safe." Bruce gazed down the hallway.

  "Okay. Okay." She squirmed, until she was on her stomach and pushed to her knees beside him. "Then we'll—"

  "Ginger!" Rain's voice bellowed over all the crying and male voices yelling in the other part of the building.

  "Shit." Bruce hauled Crystal to her feet and grabbed her arm. "Come on."

  "But the children?" She dragged her feet, tugging against his hold. "I need to stay here."

  "They'll be fine." Bruce stopped at the end of the hallway, pulled Taylor into his chest, and planted his hand on the back of her head, smothering her. "Jesus Christ. Don't look."

  "Dammit, get some towels and the medicine kit from my office," Rain ordered.

  Taylor opened her eyes, but Bruce had her turned in the wrong direction to see what was happening in the bar, and only caught Ronny skidding into the office and disappearing. She turned her head, but Bruce's hand over her eyes prevented her from seeing what was going on. Chairs scraped the floor, people yelled, and she strained to hear Slade's voice. She couldn't distinguish what anyone was saying through the commotion happening around her. The urgency and anger deafened and overwhelmed her.

  "Oh, fuck." Bruce stiffened, and then grabbed Taylor's face and framing her cheeks, held her in front of him. "Look me in the eyes, sweetheart, so I know you're hearing me. I need to help them, and that means you're going to see what happened. I need you to dig deep and hold it together."

  Her stomach rolled. "I-is it Slade?"

  "No. Torque." Bruce yelled out for the prospect, Tim. "I want you to stay with Tim. Can you do that for me?"

  "Yeah. Go, help Torque." She pressed her hands against her stomach. "Shit. Just go help him."

  Nauseous and worried, she hoped Torque was okay. He always went out of his way to help the girls when they were working, including her. Slade considered Torque one of his best friends, and they were both part of the first riders of Bantorus.

  Tim stood beside her, running his hand across the back of his neck. She touched his arm, but he wasn't even aware of her standing beside him. "You okay?"

  "Yeah." Tim nodded, pulling his gaze from the activity around the table and looked at her. "You okay?"

  She squeezed his arm. "I'll be fine."

  Nothing prepared her for the devastation in the room. A body—she assumed was Torque—lay sprawled on two tables shoved together. Her tongue stuck to the roof of her mouth. Ginger kneeled on the table, working on Torque's upper body with a towel and a pair of surgical scissors.

  "Oh, God." She covered her mouth, scanning the faces, the bodies, and the commotion.

  Blood ran from Ronny's nose, going unchecked, while he handed a bottle of whiskey to Jedman who poured it over his hand, which also ran red from blood. Taylor grabbed Tim's vest. "Come on, we need to find Slade."

  "Bruce ordered me—"

  "I know what he said, and I'm not going anywhere. We'll stay inside, I just want closer to the door in case Slade comes in." She tugged him with her.

  Whatever happened outside to cause so many injuries was probably still going on. Slade still hadn't come inside and that meant he had less protection and less Bantorus members watching his back. Even Rain worked on Torque inside—that left only three members of the first riders to deal with Los Li if the others riding hadn't received a call for help. Her stomach rolled and she swallowed the bitter taste of bile.

  Torque had no one close to him, but the club, and never talked about family members in his life. She shook her head, not willing to think about the what if's. Torque would recover. She had to believe that.

  "Do you know what happened?" she said.

  "No. I was inside. Prospects weren't allowed around Los Li," Tim said, his voice breaking. "Shit. Did you hear the noise and Torque, I don't…"

  She rubbed his arm. "It'll be okay."

  The prospects were between the age of twenty and twenty-two, babies really. Certainly not prepared for bloodshed and fighting. Even at her age, reality was never easy to accept.

  She stayed to the wall, away from direct line of the glass door. She couldn't see out the opening anyway, because of the protective shield coating on the glass, blinding the inside to people passing by and giving privacy to those who frequented the bar.

  "Dammit, I can't even see the bullet." Ginger rocked back on her heels, looked to the ceiling, and closed her eyes. "Someone make him stop bleeding so I can work."

  "Take your time, honey. You're doing great." Rain applied pressure to Torque's shoulder. "Someone give him more whiskey and let him pass out."

  Taylor blinked back her tears. Where was Slade?

  A gunshot echoed through the walls of the bar. Taylor screamed, grabbing for Tim. Her ears rang but in the sudden silence in the room, a solid thunk came from the back of the building, followed by a male grunt.

  Rain hurdled himself over Torque lying on the table, hitting the floor running. He pushed men out of his way, and other members followed their president down the hallway. Taylor forgot about Tim, forgot about her promise, and ran with the crowd. Around the shoulders of all the men crowding the hallway, she spotted Slade's head and his fist coming back.

  A scuffle broke out at once. Bantorus men dove into a pile, and Slade completely disa
ppeared. Taylor wanted to help, but she had no idea who was on the bottom of the pile and Slade was nowhere to be found.

  Another blast deafened her ears. She jolted, covering her mouth. Her scream stole her breath, because the gunshot came from within the mound of men on the floor.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Heavy weight left Slade's back and hands lifted him off the Los Li man he'd tackled as he was breaking into the back door of Cactus cove. He grasped the pistol in his hand and stared down at a dead man.

  Rain pushed his way in front of Slade and backed him to the wall. "Back down. We've got you covered."

  "What?" He looked at Rain, surprised to find his president inside the bar.

  "Man, we got you covered." Rain gripped Slade's wrist and pried the weapon out of his hand. "That's it…easy, man."

  He glanced at Rain, the dead man, the gun. His fingers curled, yet his hand still vibrated from the shot.

  Rain turned. "Take him to Taylor."

  Ronny escorted Slade down the hall. He peered over his shoulder back at the man sprawled on the ground. The Los Li member had tried to gain entrance to the bar through the back door. Taylor was inside. His kids were inside. He had to keep them safe.

  He whipped his gaze around and found Taylor standing at the entrance of the hallway. He pushed his way through, and caught her as she flew at him.

  After a quick hug, Taylor pulled back and put her hands everywhere on his body, under his shirt, down his arms, around his back, even patting down his hips and then his face. He grabbed her wrist. "You okay?"

  "Yeah. You?" She dove at his chest again and held on tight.

  "Fine." He cupped the back of her head, surprised to find his heart racing. "The kids?"

  "They're safe and locked in the back room still." She looked up at him. Angst and worry lined her eyes, which were usually lit up and laughing. "D-did you shoot him?"

  He looked down the hall. He'd wrestled for the gun, wanting to grab the weapon before the other guy could get off a shot. In the scramble of the takedown, the barrel of the gun pointed in Slade's ribs and he'd thought of his kids, of Taylor, of letting the madness win, and somehow found the strength to turn the man's hand, until the bone cracked and the gun no longer pointed at him.