Uncivilized

by Laura Stapleton

  “Yes, sir.” The hired hand ambled off in the Granville wagon’s direction.

  Del glanced at her before staring off into the western horizon. “Mademoiselle, good day, and leave the cow alone.”

  She smiled a little at his concern. “Very well, Mr. Du Boise. I’ll stay healthy, just for you.”

  “Good.” He started walking, slowly as if reluctant to leave her. “Until tonight?”

  She went to gather the boys before finding Pa. With all the Winslows accounted for, Ellen looked for Marie before spotting her riding with Sam. She didn’t want to intrude on the newlyweds’ time together. Marie would welcome her, as would Sam, but she decided against it. Jenny was helping her mother with the new baby. And Del? He was forbidden. Everyone else being too sick, old, young, or busy, she spent the next five miles walking alone and waiting for the landscape to change. Dead animals littered the roadway, often followed by discarded furniture. Ellen had difficulty in passing by some of the lovelier pieces. She didn’t miss the chance to grab some of the loose wood for the day’s campfire.

  The bugle sounded and she wondered why Lucky played it so soon in the day. As she approached the front of the train, Ellen saw a trickle of a creek with a thin band of grass lining either bank. Not the best place they’d ever spent a noon hour at, but not the worst either.

  She had just enough time to pass out biscuits to her brothers and father, change Buster’s diaper, and get everyone a drink of water. Ellen took extra time hugging her baby brother. She reassured him accidents happened to everyone, and then they were traveling again. They crossed dry creeks and wide dusty expanses. A cool wind kept them from sweating under the hot sun. Another eight miles along the road and they found a grassy area surrounding a small pond. The livestock’s hooves had muddied the water, so she decided to wait until later for fresher drinking.

  Pa had unhitched their ox. Ellen climbed up into the wagon and gathered everything they’d need for supper.

  “I’m supposed to help you.” Skeeter climbed onto the tailgate. “Pa said so.”

  She stifled a chuckle at his surly tone. “Good, I need someone to strain water for us. Take this and get started while I fix a fire and start things cooking.”

  “Is this going to take long?”

  “Nope. Sooner you get started, sooner you’re done.” She ignored his frown. The day was still young enough; of course he wanted to be out with his friends and getting into trouble. Ellen kept an eye on him as he placed the muslin over a large jar and tied twine around the mouth to keep the cloth in place. He gingerly poured the water from small to large. She noticed the water was still cloudy. “That’s good, Skeeter.”

  “I can go?”

  “Yes, and take Buster with you.”

  “Aw, sis.”

  “Take him.”

  He frowned, but to his credit Skeeter was kind as he held out a hand to his baby brother. “C’mon, Bust. My friends are waiting.” He glanced back at Ellen. “They probably brought their brothers too.”

  “I’m sure they did. Be back before dark.” She watched as they ran off and wasn’t too worried. They knew when dinner would be. Ellen built a fire and sifted tiny moths from the flour with a cheesecloth. She checked every so often on the water, impatiently waiting for the silt to settle. Maybe someday they’d be near a good fishing place. When that happened, she’d want clean cornmeal. Ellen checked and the jar holding the meal had kept it bug and moisture free.

  At last no other tasks remained, so she poured water over the beans and rice already in the cook pot and put the lid on it. They’d need more water for coffee tomorrow, so she repeated the fetching process at the pond. After that, she was at loose ends. Pa was at another camp, and she knew the boys were still playing. She wanted to sneak away and talk with Del, but he had to be too busy to chat. Everyone had something to do, as did she. After mending their clothes, Ellen spent the time writing in her journal about Uncle Joe’s death, their lost cow, and the barren land while their dinner cooked. She had to pause and stir every so often, giving her a welcome chance to stretch.

  Pa walked up, breaking her concentration. “I’d like to say that smells good.”

  She chuckled. “So would I.”

  “There ain’t much anyone can do about it, is there, girl?”

  “No, not unless we run into an orchard.” When he grinned, she soaked up the affection like the land around her absorbed rain. She wanted to keep him talking and enjoy an easy conversation but was afraid of ruining the happy mood.

  “You seen any of those women in that Harper group over there?”

  “Not really. Only at a distance.”

  “They’re fine looking and some of them need husbands.”

  Ellen stirred their dinner again as Pa went on, telling her all about the single women and the qualities of each one. She didn’t care, too dismayed at how his earlier good humor wasn’t because they were getting along. She gave him the appropriate responses as he droned on. Ellen kept an ear open enough for any changes in what he said, but nothing caught her attention. She glanced up when the boys ran over to them. She welcomed the interruption and said, “There you are! Ready for dinner?”

  “Dinner!” Buster hollered and grabbed a plate.

  She laughed, giving him a little bit to eat. “It’s hot, so be careful.” Ellen served up food for everyone. They all ate quickly, the food too bland and tough to enjoy.

  “Sis, do you need any help?” asked Skeeter.

  Ellen knew why he asked. He wanted a pass on evening chores. “No, go ahead and play until dark, if Pa agrees.”

  “Sure, why not? I might mosey over to the other camp myself. One of the ladies promised me dessert if I’d visit.” Pa got to his feet and stretched. “Yep, some mighty fine women in that other group. You all might be asleep when I get back.”

  “All right.” She stopped just short of telling him to have a good time. He’d be the new rooster in a henhouse, guaranteed to have a fun night ahead. She ruffled Buster’s hair. “Looks like you and me get to wash up and play games.” Ellen retrieved him a fresh diaper. “Take this.” She threw a bar of soap into the bucket and took her brother’s hand. They walked to the water for their nightly ritual of washing dishes before bathing him.

  Too soon, goopy mud clung to both of their feet and she was at a loss about what to do. Buster had already scooped up two handfuls and threw them at her. She shrieked, the mud sliding down her skirt. “Oh, good. I needed a bath too.” She shook her head, set down the bucket, and picked up her brother. Soon she had him stripped bare and was hauling him closer to the middle of the shallow lake. “Stop wiggling, silly. I can’t let you go or you’ll drown.”

  Mid thigh deep to her meant he couldn’t reach down for the sludge. She washed his feet, making sure to tickle him. He soon started shivering and Ellen brought him back to shore. “Here,” She put his shirt on over his head. “Hold still and let me put on your diaper.” He did as she asked, and she smoothed down his wet hair. “You’re so handsome! You need pants, though, and they’re in the wagon. Let me wash these.” She picked up the dish bucket while dropping his dirty clothes. “I’ll hurry and no wallowing in the mud or you get another bath, all right?”

  He nodded, his teeth chattering, and Ellen rushed through the last of her chores. Her wet skirt weighed her down, but at least the road dirt was gone. They’d almost reached the wagon when Sam caught up to them.

  “Miss Winslow? Do you have a moment?”

  Giving him a smile, she indicated her little brother with a nod of her head. “I will as soon as Buster is dressed.”

  “Here, let me carry this and you can carry him.” He took her dishes.

  When they reached the wagon, she dug through the clothes for him a clean pair of pants. She waited until he was dressed to ask, “Is there something I can help you with?”

  The man watched as the little boy ran over to a toy he’d left near the campfire. Sam turned back to Ellen and dug around in his pocket. “Yes, actually
, there is. I’m rather weighed down with a hairbrush and need you to take it for me.”

  Her breath caught when she saw her mother’s hairbrush, or at least one identical to it. “Sam, how did you find this? Del took it….”

  He shrugged. “I’m not supposed to tell you how exactly.”

  She laughed at his sheepish face. He’d probably been sworn to secrecy, so she didn’t want to tease him too much. “Very well, tell me approximately.”

  “I can do that. This one man in the group, I’m not sure who….Well, he noticed your brothers needed new shoes but couldn’t abide by the terms of the trade. So, he interfered and traded something he says he’d never miss, just so the brush could remain yours.”

  Tears burned behind her eyes at Del’s thoughtfulness. She already owed him more debts than she could ever repay. “That’s so wonderful.” She hugged Sam. “Thank him, please.”

  “I will. Do you want me to hug him as well?”

  Ellen snickered as she let go of him. “Only if you want to do so. I’d hate to forbid you anything.”

  “Much obliged. I’ll let you hug him yourself. He’d enjoy that more.” Sam grinned. “If you’ll excuse me, it is almost time for first watch. Is your family nearby?”

  “They’ve made friends at another camp and should be along soon. Or so Pa said a while back.”

  He nodded and left. She looked to see Buster staring into the glowing embers, half asleep, and worked fast to put away her heirloom and to get bedding down for him.

  “Story?”

  “Yes, when Skeeter is here too. Rest now and he’ll be back soon.” She kissed his forehead then eased away to finish. Soon, she lay in her own bed, the others open and ready for Pa and Skeeter. Ellen thought about what Del had done for her and the boys. If not so tired and needing to keep an eye on the baby, she’d thank him in person. She hoped the item he’d traded truly was something he’d not miss. Resting her hands behind her head, she wished she could write all this in her journal. Maybe she could, if she just mentioned certain things and not the person behind them. She sat up and went to get the little book. No sooner than she’d written about the pond did Pa and Skeeter return.

  “Yeah, those are some fine ladies, Skeeter. How’d you like one of them to be your new Ma?”

  “I’m not sure.”

  Ellen looked from one to the other. Pa didn’t notice the stricken look on his son’s face. She knew how he felt, having had Lucy as a new ma too soon after hers had passed. She glanced at Buster, glad he was a heavy little sleeper. “Seems like you both had a good time tonight.”

  “We did.” Pa kicked off his boots and turned to her. “You writing in that tonight?”

  “Just finished.”

  “Hand it over and let’s see what all fired important thing happened to you today.”

  She did as asked and waited until he finished reading. No sense in settling in if something Ellen had written angered him.

  “Hmph. Same ole, same ole day, huh?” He gave the journal back to her with a toss. “You should have come with us. We had a grand time tonight.”

  “I should have.” She wore her smile, setting into bed and tucking the journal under her pillow. Considering the company Pa had kept tonight, Ellen was glad chores and Buster kept her here. She just wished they didn’t keep her from Del so much.

  Pa was up and at a distance, judging from the volume of his voice. The boys still slept, Ellen could tell from their soft breathing. She kept her eyes closed, not wanting to start the day so early. She heard something from Pa about more animal deaths and their ox being fine. She sighed with relief and nestled into the covers a little more. Maybe faking sleep would bring back her dreams. She tried to drift off through the increasing noise as people scrambled, moving oxen around to make sure everyone had an animal for their wagon.

  “C’mon, lazybones.” Pa nudged her with his foot. “Get up and get ready. Coffee’s ready.”

  Ellen sat up, rubbing her eyes and reaching for her glasses. She must have fallen asleep because the campfire burned and her brothers were gone. “Where are the boys?”

  “Off taking care of their morning business.”

  She nodded, taking a full cup from him. “Are they fetching water too?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Good, that’ll help me with breakfast.” She got up and retrieved the breakfast fixings from the wagon. Just then, her brothers walked up, both carrying the bucket.

  “We helped,” said Buster.

  “So you did. Thank you.” She took the water from them and began making biscuits.

  Pa settled in next to the fire, holding his hands out to warm. “There was talk this morning about how heavy everyone’s wagon is. Several animals died last night, some of them draft animals.”

  Ellen nodded. She’d heard correctly, then. “That’s a shame.”

  “Word is, the road’s going to get rougher. Now’d be a good time to drop any extras.” He took a sip. “We have a lot of junk in the front of the wagon we don’t use. Leave it behind and our ox might live longer.”

  She focused on each spoonful of batter as she dropped them in the pan. “I’m not sure. We’ll need everything we have for our new home.”

  “We will, huh? Or is it you just thinking of yourself again?”

  He’d seen through her words to their true meaning and Ellen swallowed. “What? No, I’m thinking of the four of us trying to start a new life.”

  “Think for yourself, missy, because I have several gals lined up to be a mother to my boys. We don’t need you.”

  “Yes, we do, Pa. We need her.” Both boys had big eyes, staring at their father.

  Pa glared at them before dumping his coffee in the fire and walking away. He let the cup fall behind him, and Ellen made a note to pick it up on her way to wash dishes. She smiled at her brothers. “Now then, who’s ready for a biscuit and jam?”

  Soon, she had them eating breakfast with their extra treat. Ellen put away some food for lunch in case they couldn’t stop for noon. Too soon, the signal to move out was given. She had just enough time to throw everything into the back of the wagon.

  They spent the day going up and down hills like the one she’d slipped on before. By now, all the fun was gone, even for the children. None of them slid down as they’d done earlier. With every mile, the men made a decision to go one more to find water. Twelve miles later, they’d found it.

  Word drifted back that they’d reached a hot springs that wasn’t good to drink. Ellen walked up to the front, finding Marie and Sam there.

  “I’d like it if we could do some washing up,” said Marie.

  Sam leaned in toward her before waving a hand in front of his face. “So would I, Miss Smelly, but we need to make better time than we have been.”

  When Marie caught sight of her, she said, “Ellen! I’ve missed you.” Back to her husband, she added, “It’s Mrs. Smelly to you, and please? Even an hour or two extra would be good.” She enveloped her friend in a hug.

  “All right, an hour extra.” Sam tipped his hat to both of them. “Let me go tell everyone the news.

  She put her hands on her hips and watched her husband walk away. “Goodness, ask that man for a mile and I get a foot. Never mind him, it’s good to see you.”

  Ellen grinned. “Likewise, and already I need to go and get washing.”

  “It never ends, does it? I always miss having help with daily tasks.” Marie shook her head. “Never mind that! Here I am going on about my trials when yours are so much more. Please forgive me. Can I help you with anything?”

  “No, you have enough chores of your own. Let’s take the chance during laundry to chat.” She kept her own counsel on what sort of people had been there for Marie. The Winslows had never been wealthy enough to own slaves, but she was sure the Warrens had been.

  “I’d love that. Meet you back here?”

  “Certainly.” Ellen turned to her wagon, running full on into Del. “Oh! Excuse me!” She looked up at him and basked i
n his happy expression. “I’m glad to see you too.”

  “You forget yourself, ma coeur.”

  A wave of horror swept her. Pa could be around any corner or even behind her, listening. What if he’d heard the affection in her voice? Ellen clenched shut her hands to stop their trembling. “I have, indeed. Please forgive me.”

  “De rein.” He stood a little straighter. “It seems we are equally pleased at this slight contact.”

  She nodded. “It’s been too long since we’ve talked.”

  “Should I summon Pointed Nose to give me an excuse to rescue you?”

  A shiver went through her. “Goodness, no. With Lucy then Uncle Joe, I’d prefer you to be the only native we see from now on.”

  He paused before taking a deep breath to say, “I understand and agree. How is your wrist? Is it healing?”

  “Slowly, yes.” She moved it to and fro, about to add more when she saw his expression. She turned to see Pa walking toward them. “Oh dear.”

  “Let me.” He strolled up to Jack. “You’ve heard we’re here for an extra hour or so at the ladies’ request?”

  “No, I ain’t heard nothing.”

  “Sam wanted everyone to know so they’d have a chance to wash up at the springs. Good day.” As if too busy for small talk, Del continued on before Winslow could reply.

  She saw Marie walk nearby and took the chance to escape a temper tantrum. “Pa, do you want to watch the boys while I do laundry?”

  He scratched his chin, frowning deep furrows between his eyes. “No, but I reckon I don’t have a choice with you here to tell me what to do.”

  His voice had that edge that warned her of an impending outburst and she put on a smile. “You’re busy, of course. I should have known better and will have Skeeter help me.”

  Scanning her face as if trying to see a lie, Pa squinted. “All right. I’ll keep an eye on Buster since I can’t count on you.”

  Later. She could be angry later. Right now, time slipped past, as did her chance to wash Buster’s diapers and pants. “Thank you.” She hurried to the wagon, leaving him behind, and gathered up what she needed.