Attainment

by J H Cardwell

  "I don't mean to come on so strong Reese. This is all I know...money. I see someone different, genuine when I look at you. I see love and maturity...you’re an old soul Reese Stanford. I want to get to know you better. That’s what I want....what I need. I want to love someone who cares about me...not just for the money, but for ...me. I've never had that before. But I felt that when I was with you. Please take these." I was staring at him...feeling sorry for him. "Consider it a friendship gift, then," he said.

  “John, I can’t begin to tell you how upset and confused that makes me. I know you think you feel that way about me, but, you can’t okay. Please don’t. I need you to tell your heart that it needs to move on.” I was sad saying the words, because I knew deep down I loved having him feel that way about me. “You know I think so much of you too John, but I could never act on any feelings I have. I respect and love Tate too much…”

  John cut me off. "And as far as Tate, he already has screwed up Reese..." John sat by me on my bed, staring in my eyes..."I think he’ll be tried for the murder of Carter...I don't see how he can get out of it, even if his parents are lawyers." I was feeling sick on my stomach all of a sudden. John kept talking, "I have a lot of attorneys myself and for the corporation. They were able to find out all kinds of information on the charges. Unless the gun and the true killer, if it's not Tate, come forward, he will be charged. Carter's parents were interviewed, and they said he’s already fought Carter once. They said Tate hated Carter, and had even said he would kill him before." He had said that, I thought, but only to me...he said he would kill him if he hurt me again. My heart rate had escalated; my eyes were darting around the room. "I'm sorry this is so hard on you." Then he put his arms around me. I was so upset I put my head in the crook of his neck and cried.

  "John, please, you have to leave me alone, okay? I...can't see you anymore."

  "You don't mean that..."

  "Yes...she does...get the hell away from her." Tate...I couldn't believe Tate was here, and seeing me lean on John. I wasn't sure what to do.

  "I can't believe you’re here...how...it's so late...?"

  "Obviously, it’s not late enough..." He said staring at John. "Didn't she tell you to leave her alone? I expect you to leave now."

  John got up, staring at me the whole time, and walked towards the door. "Good luck Tate, you’re going to need it." He said, never looking directly at him. Then he was gone...again.

  "Reese...what is it with you and him? Do you want him Reese? He’s trying to drive a wedge between us...I...I'm not sure I can compete with him." He looked down at the gift box on the bed, then to the bracelets on my arm. "Shit Reese. Did you keep these?" He held up the box, pure pain in his eyes. He acted like he was going to throw it hard, but he didn't release it. Then he carefully set it back. "I'm truly losing it here. I came here to tell you..." He sat on my bed, looking at me with tired eyes... then more quietly he said "I came here to tell you that they’re calling me in for questioning in the morning. They have new evidence from Carter's parents that I had threatened Carter before, and they said I probably shot him on purpose, and hid the gun. My parents are worried sick Reese. I...I’m worried too. Then, I come here and find you in the arms of another man...a multi-millionaire....Ahhh!" He made a loud noise in the air and stood up quickly, running his hands through his hair.

  "Tate, come here. Please lay with me. Stay here...with me...tonight." He sat on my bed. His eyes were begging me for confirmation...confirmation that I was still his. I leaned forward and kissed him, lightly at first, then long, and hard. Within seconds, he was kissing me back hard, all of the frustration strengthening his kiss and his embrace.

  "Oh Reese, I...need...you...now". He was unraveling right before my eyes. His lips were all over me, kissing my neck, down to my breast, then back up to my lips again. "Please Reese, let me know you are still mine...all of you." His hands were wandering, rubbing my front. I could feel the stress from all of his troubles wound tight in his muscles. I know he needed me...all of me...but I couldn't. Just as I was about to tell him no, the door opened, and in walked my night nurse.

  "I'm here to take your vitals, Miss... Oh my goodness. You two can't do that here. Mr., you need to get either in that cot, or leave please. Besides, what happened to your brother Ms. Stanford? He was in here earlier...what a handsome devil he is." Great, make Tate feel worse will you? I thought.

  We put our foreheads together to catch our breath. I was sure Tate was reeling from her comment. But he was a gentleman as usual.

  "Yes ma'am, we will be smart. I’ll sleep on the cot. And her brother…he left already…he won't be back." He looked at me, like he was making me a promise.

  As soon as the nurse was gone, he climbed back in bed with me. We were spooning each other. I was comfortable and completely satisfied in his arms...as usual.

  "Tate, what are we going to do? Let's forget about John for now." He started to protest. "Please Tate we need to focus on getting you out of trouble. I need you to be okay....I know you don't want to do this....I don't want you to do this, but you need to talk with Lisa...completely off the record. I think there’s more to this story. When Tony was here, he was hating on you, telling me you were no good for me." Tate leaned back to look at me with anger in his eyes. I laid back against his chest. "I don't care what he says, I know he’s hurting, but some things he said just didn't make sense. I really think he was there the night of the shooting. I saw him! I’m sure of it. You need to find out from Lisa what he’s hiding. Maybe your parents could help you with it...you know, record it or something."

  I wasn't sure what he needed to do, but he had to be let off. I couldn't stand to think of him being blamed for Carter's death. And prison...I was SO scared on the inside...but I had to be strong for Tate. This was his entire future hanging in the balance and "all for me". I just realized I said that out loud. He turned me to him.

  "Reese, this is not your fault. It was an accident...all of it."

  I looked at him, "Go Tate...find Lisa...fix this. You can make her tell you what she knows. She’s covering for him. Go, now...you know how to reach her. There has to be a way to see her."

  "I have to be at the police station by 11 am tomorrow morning. I’ll text her and see her first thing in the morning. For now, let's rest. I want to hold you Reese."

  I looked up at him. I loved him so much...this time I wanted to protect him. "Tate, let me hold you...please. I need to know you’re here with me...all night."

  We fell asleep, each of us holding the other. Hoping the nurse didn't come in and beat Tate out of the bed.

  Chapter 27

  When I woke up, Tate was nowhere to be found. I carefully got up (I was still sore...especially on my right upper chest) trying to see if he had left a note or anything. The door opened and in walked a cheerful Tate, coffee in hand.

  "Good morning." He said, handing me my special order coffee, and offering me a soft peck on the lips. "You finally get to go home today. I know you’re ready."

  "Tate, are you okay? You seem so much better than you did last night. This is a big day for you...I'm worried about you."

  "Don't be Reese. I’m going to try to work it out...no, I'm sure it will work out. I texted Lisa how sorry I was about Carter. She’s going to meet at the corner coffee shop at 9:30 this morning. So, I’m heading home to talk with my parents first. I love you...wish me luck."

  He gave me another swift kiss. Then he said "and I've already spoken to your mom, she’s coming at 10:30 am to take you home."

  My man, he thinks of everything. "I love you Tate. Please call me when you know something."

  "I love you too Reese. Bye." He said walking out the door. I showered quickly and got dressed. I was feeling stronger every day. I was putting my things in my bag, when there was a knock at the door.

  "Can I come in?" the voice was a familiar but distant one. Then I registered who it was.

  "Josh, come in." Why was Carter's brother here to see me? He looked awful.<
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  "I hope you don't mind me coming by Reese. I...I'm sorry you had to be here...I'm sorry for everything that has happened. I can't believe..." He looked right into my eyes. "I can't believe Carter is gone." He dropped his chin down, clearly trying to suppress his crying.

  "Josh, I'm okay now. I'm sorry...sorry about Carter. I can't believe he’s gone either. He was much too young. I never knew him to be so violent...you know, to have a gun with him." I said.

  "That's why I'm here, Reese. He did have a gun...Dad's gun...and he had learned his violence from...our dad as well." His words were broken and pained. Years of heartache were expressed with each syllable. "I have deliberated over whether or not to come to you, but in the end I had to. It's the right thing to do."

  I didn't understand. Come to see me? "I'm glad you came. Were you worried I wouldn't want to see you...what do you mean the right thing to do?"

  "I heard Reese. I heard what Carter did to you." He quickly looked away, then when his eyes met mine again, they were red and...and totally sincere. "Carter...he raped you. I didn't know Reese. I'm so sorry. No one should ever have to go through that...I just don't get it. He loved you. I can't believe he would ever hurt you like that."

  "How did you know Josh?" I said, unsure how he would have already found out.

  "I heard my parents talking about the DNA results and how they matched your records from your case. That’s not the only thing I heard, Reese. I heard them talking about the night Carter was shot. My Mom was sobbing, hysterically, so it was hard to understand. They didn't know I was there. But I had just come into town and had used my key on the back door. I had no idea what I would hear when they thought they were alone." Josh paced back and forth. He was over-anxious, and grief stricken.

  "Josh, what did you hear?" I was unsure what he was going to say, but for some reason I had an intense fear that resonated deep in my gut. He walked closer to me then. As he did, I could see his hands trembling. He grabbed my arms as if he were really needing me to hold him up.

  "My dad...he...he was there when Carter was shot. He...he was yelling at my mom, scaring her into lying for him. He shook her so hard, making her promise to say he was at home with her." Josh was nearly whispering, like he still couldn't believe he was saying these words out loud.

  I KNEW I had seen Tony there at Lookout Ledge. I knew it. But why? "Josh, why wouldn't he say so? Why would he deny I saw him? I don't understand." I know my words were running together, but I just couldn't comprehend all of the secrecy.

  "Reese...I heard everything. I can't believe he was telling my mother. I guess he really does think she would do anything if he scared her and threatened her enough. Or, maybe he was still in shock himself, and he didn't realize he was even talking." He was shaking his head, still in disbelief himself.

  "What...what did you hear Josh?"

  "Oh God...I'm not sure about telling you this. I'm not sure about anything anymore. I lost my only brother." Then he looked at me again. His pain was heart-wrenching. "Now I'm about to lose my dad too...I guess the pain won't be quite as horrible as with Carter. My dad has never been a father. He’s been our family abuser my whole life, and Carter's too. The only person he ever really tried hard to please was Carter in his sick, twisted way. I think he felt he had a second chance to raise a son better than he had me. In the end...that was the son he killed."

  What? "Killed...Josh, what do you mean...emotionally?" My head was spinning. What was he saying?

  He paced back and forth again. Then he stopped and dropped on his knees down to the floor. "My Dad murdered Carter...accidentally...he shot him, thinking he was hitting Tate."

  I half gasped, half screamed out loud. I threw my hand to my mouth and sat back hard on the bed. My eyes were frozen open, staring at the floor. I slowly raised them to Josh. "Josh, you mean...you mean that’s why he was there...he was there to kill Tate?" I felt like I was going to be sick. Tate was almost killed. He was almost gone forever...instead of Carter.

  "Yes Reese. He was obsessed with getting rid of him. Ever since he caught my mom and him together, he has despised him. Then, every chance my mom got, she threw it in his face, that she could leave him for someone younger and that she had sex with him." My breathing stilled. He promised me he hadn't slept with her. "Then when Carter couldn't get you back because of him, he figured it was time, time to fix the problem, the problem of Tate Justice. I'm sorry Reese. I know this is hard to hear. I can't believe I'm even telling you. I...I’m so worried for my mom, and so tired of my dad ruining our lives. He KILLED Carter." Josh was sobbing, his head in his hands.

  I kneeled down to him and touched his hands. "I’m so proud of you for doing the right thing Josh. I can't imagine how difficult this must be for you." I waited until he lowered his hands. I still couldn't believe what I was hearing. Then I looked him in the eyes. "Are you saying he shot at Tate while Tate and Carter were fighting, and he accidentally shot Carter...in the stomach? Then he ran?"

  He was shaking his head yes, "I heard him telling my mom. She was hysterical. She was so distraught. I thought she would die right there in his arms. Her scream was piercing. I wanted to run to her, but I needed to hear what was happening. Thank God I waited. He revealed the whole truth. He told her how you were shot too, and how Tate would be blamed for shooting both you and Carter. I think that news was also devastating for my mom. I know she still has feelings for him. I don't necessarily blame Tate for what happened between them, like Carter and my Dad did. I know my Mom was reeling from the attention he was giving her, trying to help her out. She was so worn down from the abuse, and emotionally living in daily turmoil. Then a young Tate was around to help her start picking up the pieces. God knows, my mom deserves a life better than what she has had. My mom told my Dad several times she and Tate had slept together, but for some reason, I don't believe it. I think she was trying to push him over the edge. He has been so close, so many times."

  I felt an instant sense of relief that Tate hopefully had told me the truth. I honestly was more worried about Tate almost being shot that anything else. I kept picturing him lying there bleeding to death...and not Carter. I started crying.

  "Reese, I'm sorry. This is the biggest mess...all of it. And if I would’ve known my sorry ass friend, Skip, had given Carter Rohypnol," his words were a hiss, "I would have stopped him. Please forgive me."

  "You didn't know Josh." We both stood up "How could you apologize for what your brother did? I loved him once...Josh. I loved Carter. If he had had a different home life..." I was crying again, "He would still be here, alive, and who knows we might still be a couple. He had a hold over me for so long."

  We hugged then, a bond between us forever forged. We had both loved Carter, and we were both hurting. Josh had willingly admitted to the murder of his brother by his own father. Then I quickly jumped back. "I have to call Tate, Josh. He was supposed to meet with your mom this morning to try to find out what was going on with your dad." I knew it wouldn't be as urgent of a matter for him, but I was worried what Tate would have to sacrifice to gain any new information from Lisa. Selfishly, I needed Josh to go to the authorities...and quick. I was also worried for Tate, if Tony lost it again. Would he still try to kill him?

  "Will you testify Josh? Will you go to the police and tell them what all you told me?"

  "That’s why I came here. I know when my father finds out, he will hate me forever. I will just have to live with that. He has taken so much from me already. I need to know he can't take my integrity too. Maybe this way, my mom can move on without him....while he’s rotting in jail."

  I could tell he was still torn by his confession. I would always know Josh was a great man from this day forward. We hugged one last time. I thanked him, and begged him to please talk quickly to the police, before any more time passed. He left then. I immediately called Tate. He didn't answer any of the five times I tried him. So I did the only thing I knew to do. I planned to find him.

  I called my mom and said I needed
her to come as quick as she could, that I needed to run an errand on the way home. I would have to fill her in quickly about what was happening, and what Josh had said. I would need to get Tate's parents involved immediately, so they could work on getting the charges dropped. It wasn't going to be easy for my mom (and dad for that matter) to hear what Tony had done. They’ve known the Davis's for years. It would be devastating for them. She’d already learned this past week of how Carter was a match for the DNA. It was a horrible shock to her. For the first couple of days, Lisa wouldn't talk with her about it. She finally said she was sorry, of course, but that 'what could she do, Carter was dead.'

  After signing my life away to get discharged from the hospital, I quickly began to fill my mom in. I was a little worried about telling her while she was driving, so I asked her to pull over, when I told her the part about Tony pulling the trigger. She broke down of course. She had similar emotions as I did. Tate could have easily died, and Tony would forever have to live with the fact that he killed his own son. And most of all, Lisa's loss was the greatest...a son, and now a husband. I wanted to say and Tate too, but she wasn't aware of that saga yet. Time would tell how my parents would react to those details. For now she simply thought he was doing it to help Carter out where I was concerned.

  Chapter 28

  When we got to the coffee shop, I saw Tate's truck and Lisa's Acura. I was apprehensive about barging in on them, but I didn't know what else to do. My mom was still a little confused as to why Tate was meeting with Lisa. I asked her to please stay in the car. I walked in searching each table until my eyes locked on Tate. He was sitting beside of Lisa, with his arm around her. She was crying into his shoulder. His eyes were red, and teary. I wasn't sure what to do. I slowly walked to them, he straightened up immediately.