It was after ten o’clock before Jase returned. When the door opened, I paused the movie I’d turned on, and glanced at him. “You’ve been gone a while.”
I tried not to be suspicious, but it was hard.
He joined me on the couch and dropped his head back onto the cushions. “I went by and visited with my parents.”
“How are they?”
He shrugged. “Same as always.”
“That’s not an answer,” I pointed out.
He rolled toward me. “What do you want me to say, Cara? My parents are fucked in the head?”
“No, they’re not,” I said with a laugh. At his pointed look, I lowered my voice to a whisper. “Are they?”
“They put too much pressure on Jackie. It was only a matter of time until she cracked.”
I’d never witnessed it, so the Whitmores must’ve hidden it well. “What about you?”
Jase shrugged. “I played the perfect son role for eighteen years. It was enough.”
“But they don’t know…”
He shook his head. “They don’t need to. All they care about is I’m successful. They know I work in film production. That’s all they need to know.”
“That’s no way to live, Jase.”
Pain flickered across his face. “I’ve been trained not to disappoint them. Old habits die hard.” He reached for my hand and squeezed it. “I’m glad you’re here.”
“Me too.”
He cradled my cheek and leaned in to kiss me. “What do you want to do today?”
He’d think I was crazy, especially after he’d just driven from Vestavia Hills, but it was time for me to return and put part of my past behind me. “Can you take me to The Gardens?”
He nodded, almost as if he’d expected me to ask. A few minutes later, we were in his Hummer and heading back to our hometown. The roads became familiar and soon he turned onto the avenue that would take us to my parents’ final resting ground.
After parking and shutting off the engine, Jase glanced at me. “Ready?”
It was smart of him to be leery. Too many times I’d broken down before him, too weighted by grief to recognize my entire life was still before me.
I opened the door and climbed out of the SUV. The gate creaked as I opened it, and I nodded at the elderly man who often came to visit his wife’s grave. He tipped his head and continued down the path with his familiar, shuffling gait.
My parents’ graves were in the right corner, a tiny plot encircled by struggling rose bushes and a concrete bench. I approached the stones cautiously, wondering when the all-encompassing grief would engulf me. Each step brought me closer, but I remained calm and in control.
Jase lingered near the bench, allowing me a private moment with my parents. I squatted and reached out to touch my mother’s headstone. I traced the letters which formed her name and a single tear leaked from my eye. No others followed it.
I moved to my father’s grave and did the same. Once again, I wondered what he’d experienced in those final moments, when he’d stood over his dead wife and realized what he’d done. Had he regretted it? Had he thought of me?
I closed my eyes and willed the sadness away.
“I forgive you,” I whispered to him.
Jase touched my shoulder and helped me stand. “Are you okay?” he asked.
I nodded and wrapped my arms around his waist. “Let’s go home.”
The funny thing about happiness, something bad waits around the corner. I never imagined how awful it would become.
Jase left for Florida on Thursday afternoon. It hurt to watch him leave, but my first GED class was that night and I didn’t want to miss it. I arrived a few minutes before class was scheduled to begin and found a seat near the front row.
People shuffled in. An older lady took the seat to my left and a guy about my age took the desk to the right. He smiled at me as he pulled out a pencil and notebook. “Hey.”
“Hey,” I answered, but glanced from him as the teacher arrived and passed out a syllabus.
I reviewed the items we would learn and decided it wouldn’t be too difficult. Many of the subjects listed were ones I’d already studied. My strong suits were math and history, but I’d made decent grades in the others.
During a break in the two hour long class, the guy beside me inched his desk closer. “Are you pregnant or something?”
I jerked my head toward him. “Excuse me?”
He held up his hands. “Sorry. I just don’t see girls like you in here unless they’re pregnant.”
I shook my head and wondered how many times he’d taken the class. “I’m not pregnant.”
He continued to stare. “You remind me of someone.”
I rolled my eyes. Had he seriously just used the oldest pick-up line in the book? “I don’t think so.”
“No, you do.” He studied me while chewing on the eraser end of his pencil. “On TV or something.”
I gave him a weak smile and pretended to study the notes I’d jotted.
“I’ve got it. You look just like the girl in the video. The one that went viral this week.”
A sense of foreboding settled in my lower belly. “What video?”
He pulled out his phone and tapped on it. Moments later, he showed me a still image. I swallowed my gasp of outrage. It was me! Dressed in the get-up I’d worn when I’d made the film for…
Oh, God.
I snatched the phone and hit play, quickly muting the volume. The video ended before Jase arrived, but the entire scene of me touching myself was right there on social media for all to enjoy.
My hands shook as I handed the phone back to him. “I’ve…I’ve got to go.”
I snatched up my belongings and hurried out of the room. My heart nearly pounded out of my chest, and I couldn’t breathe. This was worse than the picture taken the night of my parents’ death. Who would be so evil? Who’d want to embarrass me?
Jackie.
The truth settled over me like a dark cloud.
It had to be her. She was the only one who’d had access to Jase’s apartment. Not once did I suspect Jase. He’d never be so cruel, but Jackie delighted in my pain. The memory of the open sock drawer made me realize what a fool I’d been. Jase had probably hidden the disk in there, and she’d most likely found it.
I pulled out my phone and dialed Jase’s number. He answered on the second ring. “Hey, beautiful.”
I didn’t waste time with small talk. “Where did you put the tape we made?”
“It’s safe. Don’t worry about it. Why? Do you want to watch it?”
I ignored the teasing in his voice and continued. “Where, Jase? I need to know.”
“In a drawer. Why?”
I shut my eyes against a fresh pain of misery. “I think Jackie stole it and posted it on the internet.”
“The hell she did!”
“I’m serious.” I gripped the phone and sank down to sit on the curb. “A guy in class just showed it to me.”
He cursed, shocking me with the violent words and volume. “Are you sure?”
“I know what I look like. It’s me.” A moan broke out of me. “What am I going to do?”
Jase’s voice was hard as steel when he spoke. “The disk was filmed in my studio. We can file a copyright infringement. We can stop this, Cara.”
His words filled me with hope. “Can you really do it?”
“There’s no guarantee it’ll completely disappear, but it’ll block many of the attempted views. Let me see what my lawyer can do.”
A thought occurred to me. “But wouldn’t the tape be classified as porn?”
He was silent for a long moment. “You’re right,” he admitted. “I don’t care.”
The legal implications threw me for a loop. “You’d face legal charges?”
“Perhaps. It doesn’t matter. I’ll do whatever I can to stop this from getting out.”
“I don’t want you to do that.” The video was out there, on the web for anyone to fi
nd. I wouldn’t let him risk his career for me.
“I’ll stop it. I don’t care what happens.”
“But I do.” I drew in a deep breath. “Promise me you won’t do anything to implicate you or Dagger Productions. Give me time to think of another way.”
“Cara—”
“Don’t Cara me. I mean it.”
A sigh let me know he’d accepted. “Okay. I’ll fight my knee jerk reaction until we find a way to get the damned video off the web.”
“Thank you,” I whispered. He may fight his impulse to leap into action, but I wasn’t quite as strong. Thoughts of revenge tumbled through my mind.
Jase’s tone softened. “Do you need me to come home?”
I longed for him to be at my side, but I wouldn’t ask him to give up everything for me. “No. I’ll be fine.”
Jase’s sigh echoed over the line. “I’m sorry, Cara. I never meant for anyone to see it.”
“It’s not your fault.”
I knew exactly whose it was.
And vengeance was due.
Chapter Twenty-One
I don’t know how I did it, but I returned to class and did my best to act composed. I chose a seat in the back so I wouldn’t have to talk to the guy who’d shown me the video. He stared, but didn’t talk to me again.
Perv.
When class concluded, I boarded a bus for Vestavia Hills. The route ended a couple blocks from the Whitmore’s elegant three story brick home, so I walked the rest of the way.
I stood on the doorstep and rang the bell until Mr. Whitmore appeared. “Cara! What a surprise.”
Mr. Whitmore was an older, distinguished version of Jase. Gray peppered his hair, but the eyes and nose were exact matches for his son. It was easy to see why my mom would’ve wanted him.
I pushed the anger back. I didn’t know his story, had no clue what had happened between them. I’d come for one reason only.
“Is Jackie home?”
Mr. Whitmore ushered me inside. “Mary Helen, come see who came for a visit.”
Mrs. Whitmore, blonde and beautiful, entered the foyer. “Hello, my dear. How pretty you are. I love your hair!”
I stood there awkwardly and shuffled my feet. “Jackie?” I prodded.
“Jackie, you have a visitor.” Mrs. Whitmore called up the stairs.
Mr. Whitmore wandered away, leaving me alone with Jase’s mother. The tiny wrinkles I remembered were gone, probably due to plastic surgery.
“How have you been?” she asked, but her tone told me she didn’t care.
I’d been blind. Her congeniality was an act. All of it.
Jackie appeared at the top of the stairs, saw me standing there waiting, and turned as pale as the nightgown she wore.
“Oh no, you don’t!” I said when she tried to turn and flee.
I charged up the stairs, but she’d already locked her bedroom door. I banged on the wood until my knuckles bruised. “Come out, you coward. Admit it was you.”
“You’re nothing but a slut. Everyone knows it.” The thick oak muffled Jackie’s voice, but her words flayed me.
I dropped my hand and leaned close to the crack in the door, praying she heard the strength in my voice. I had no clue where it came from, but instinct chose fight over flight for once in my life. “Don’t push your insecurities on me. Your mind games don’t work. Not anymore.”
“You’re such an easy target,” Jackie said with a hiss. “Don’t act like you don’t care what people say behind your back because you do. We all do. I saw you in the hall at school when the picture of you went viral. I’m not the one with a problem, Cara.”
“The picture!” A light bulb went off inside my head. “Did you post it?”
“No.”
“You’re lying.” I pushed against the wood, wishing I was strong enough to knock it off its hinges. “Admit you did it.”
“No, she didn’t. But I did.” I didn’t hear Mrs. Whitmore come up the stairs until she spoke.
I couldn’t prevent a gasp. Mrs. Whitmore posted that awful picture of me? “You posted it?”
Her flint-like gaze landed on me. She looked like she’d gut me as soon as speak to me. “Adultery and murder is wrong. I’d do it again if I thought it would keep my children away from you.”
All the pieces fell into place. The darkness Jase tried to hide from me. The hints Mark had dropped. It all made sense now. My family wasn’t the only fucked up one. We’d just had the misfortune to make headlines.
For a brief instant, I considered hitting her. I really did. “Tell that to your husband.”
Mrs. Whitmore backed away as if she’d guessed my thoughts. “You should leave now.”
“I’m going. There’s nothing for me here anyway,” I snarled and pushed past her on my way downstairs.
I’d barely gotten out of the neighborhood before my cell phone rang. I saw Jase’s number and answered. “Hello?”
“What the hell are you doing?” he asked by way of greeting.
“What do you mean?”
“Jackie called me.”
I growled. “She did it, Jase. She posted the video of me. And your mother..she...she—” I couldn’t even give voice to the truth.
“So you retaliate by terrorizing them? Don’t sink to their level.”
Frustration and resentment poured through me in waves. I hung up on him. He called over and over again until I finally answered. “What?” I snapped.
“Where are you?”
I glanced up and came to a complete stop. I’d walked in the wrong direction, not paying any attention to the streets.
“Cara?” Jase prodded. “Tell me where you are.”
“On Overton,” I answered. My old street, the one where I’d lived with my parents.
He cursed again. “Stay there.”
I assumed he would send a cab. Even though he’d pissed me off, it felt good to be taken care of. “Send them to my old house. I’ll be there.”
I walked a couple blocks until I stood in front of the pink stucco I’d once called home. The For Sale sign remained out front. There wasn’t much market for homes that had been crime scenes. I’d read that tidbit in a magazine once.
I wished the house would burn to the ground. I stared at it until I was sure the image was branded into my eyes. Clouds covered the moon, and the wind picked up. The night was damp and cool, much like it had been the night I’d returned and found my parents.
I don’t know how I long I stood there. It could’ve been hours or mere minutes. My feet stayed planted in the center of the sidewalk, the very same one I’d rode my tricycle up and down. So many memories were made inside the house, some good and others I wished had never happened.
It was difficult to find the happy ones beneath the ugly reality I’d face the last time I’d crossed the threshold. A car pulled up behind me, and I turned. The sight of the familiar Hummer stunned me.
Jase bounded out of the car and hurried over. “Are you okay?”
I stared at him in a daze. “How did you get here?”
He ran his palms up my back and cupped my shoulders. “Did you think I would leave you alone to deal with this? Not in a million years. I drove like a bat out of hell to get to you.”
My heart melted. “You didn’t have to.”
“Yes, I did.” He tugged me toward the car, but I pulled back. He frowned. “What is it?”
“What did your parents tell you?” I wasn’t getting inside his car until he told me.
Jase ran his hand over his curls. “Does it matter?”
“Yes, it does.”
He returned to my side and touched my face. “I don’t care what they say. You shouldn’t either.”
I crossed my arms over my chest. “Tell me.”
“God, you’re stubborn.”
“And you’re avoiding the question. Tell me, Jase.”
His eyes burned with heat. “They said you threatened Jackie and my mother, that you refused to leave.”
“It’s
a lie,” I argued.
“Of course it is,” he agreed. He continued to caress my face. “I didn’t believe them. The Cara I know would never hurt another soul.”
“Don’t be so sure,” I muttered. If I ever ran into Jackie or Mrs. Whitmore, I was pretty sure I would do bodily damage. “So what now?”
He lowered his head until his face was inches from mine. “You’re probably never going to be invited to Sunday dinner.”
I rolled my eyes. “Like I care.”
“I don’t either.” Jase stepped closer and kissed me. He pulled back and gazed into my eyes. “I love you, Cara. No one will keep me away from you.”
“But your family hates me now.”
He shrugged. “Their loss. I meant what I said. No one will keep us apart.”
I stared at him, searching for the good. And I found it.
With him.
“Come on. Let’s go home.” He tried to tow me away, but I pulled away and turned to face my house.
I closed my eyes. I didn’t need to see the house to remember clearly. I’d finished my late shift at The Awfully Good Cafe and had hurried home. The front door was left ajar. Not odd in itself, but the silence I’d sensed inside had alerted me even before I smelled the gunpowder.
My father had been an avid gun collector. I’d gone with him a few times to the target range, enough to recognize the scent. The oven timer was going off, so I veered into the kitchen to shut it off, checking to make sure the pumpkin pie wasn’t burned before continuing into the living room.
I knew before I saw the blood what I’d find. Perhaps I thought performing a mundane task, like cutting off the oven, would delay the inevitable.
“I saw Mom first.” I began to speak aloud, needing Jase to know everything.
He didn’t try to stop me. He wrapped his arms around me, perhaps sensing I needed to tell him, wanted to take the first step toward healing.
“She was covered in blood. Not an inch of her body wasn’t dark red. And the smell. Oh my God the smell. I still remember it.”
I shivered, and Jase tightened his embrace even though it wasn’t a reaction to the cold. “Dad lay next to her. He’d fallen to her feet. Half his face was gone. The coroner said the bullet ricocheted and caused the excessive damage. But you saw it too.”
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