Sempiternal

by K. Renee

  Walking through me apartment, I make me way straight to the bedroom and strip out of the duds I’m wearing. Slipping between the sheets in a pair of black boxer briefs, I put me phone on the charger and roll over to me back. As soon as me eyes close, I hear me phone beep with a new message.

  Stana: Jerick, this is too much. I can’t accept this.

  Ignoring her plea fer me to take back the phone, I type her out a quick message.

  Me: No Stana. It’s not too much. I want to make sure you’re safe. Let me.

  Her reply is slow, but I don’t mind. I like knowing that she’s using the phone I bought fer her.

  Stana: It’s too much. It’s hard to figure this thing out. Let me repay you at least.

  Grinning to meself, I shake my head. There is no way I’ll let her pay fer anything as long as she is under me protection. I will make sure she is treated like the princess she is.

  Me: Banphrionsa, you will not repay me. I want to do this for you.

  Stana: What does that mean?

  Me: Princess.

  I set me phone back down next to me head and close me eyes. The exhaustion is kicking in, and I’m not sure how much longer I’ll stay awake. Before I fall asleep completely, I hear me phone beep with another message that I’ll have to check when I wake up again.

  Five hours later, I’m startled awake. Grabbing me gun, I point it towards the door and wait. When the door slowly opens, I see me Da standing in the doorway. “What the feck?” I groan out, setting the gun on the bed next to me.

  “Yer distracted lately,” he states. It’s true. All me thoughts have been on Stana and making sure that I’m around when she’s alone. Me job hasn’t suffered through, so I don’t know what the visit is fer. “Yer head is out of the game. Is it a lass?” His tone is dangerous, and he sounds almost jealous.

  “No,” I respond, just as me phone dings with a message. I look down at the screen and see her name on it.

  Stana: I get off in an hour and don’t have a ride.

  I frown at the screen, and he knows I’m lying. “Who is the lass?” He asks.

  “She’s nobody,” I state. I don’t want her to get messed up in me life. She isn’t from the family or any friendlies, so I know that it will be rough to be accepted by me Da. He doesn’t like outsiders to know anything about us.

  “Bring yer lass to dinner.” He doesn’t give me an option.

  “Da, we aren’t even dating. I just met the lass.” He eyes me fer a few seconds before he drops it.

  “Fine. If ye get serious, we must meet the lass. No exceptions.” He turns to walk away, but stops and turns back to me. “She part of the fold?” I stay quiet, and he shakes his head at me. “Ye know the consequences,” he bites out. I shrug me shoulders. He can threaten me all he wants, but it won’t change me mind about her.

  “Da, no offense, but I’ll date who I want. Ye may be the boss of the family, but ye don’t run me love life. She won’t be a distraction.” One thing I know about me Da is that he doesn’t like distractions. I need to get me head on straight, and now that she has a phone, I can focus more. I won’t have to watch her every move.

  “Jerick don’t fecking tempt me. Ye me boyo don’t get to make the rules. Get yer head on straight and cut the lass loose.” He walks out the door without so much as another word. I grab me phone and send her a message back.

  Me: I’ll be there to pick ye up Banphrionsa

  Tossing me phone on the bed next to me, I lay back against the pillows and close me eyes. At least I’ll get to see her soon.

  When I finally pull me arse out of bed, I make me way to the bathroom and start the shower. As the water heats up, I think about the lass that has stolen every free minute of me head. I don’t know how she’s gotten so stuck in me head, but I’m glad she has.

  Stripping out of me boxer briefs, I get in the shower and shut the curtain. As the water rains down on me, me mind instantly thinks about the sexy legs she has and what I would do if I was between them. Me dick hardens, and I run me hand over me length. I imagine that it’s her hand that is stroking me, taking me closer and closer to the edge. It doesn’t take me long to come. Me whole body was begging fer it. I need to get her off me mind somehow.

  Maybe shagging her will get this hold off of me. I need to get past her and soon. I can’t let this shit affect me job and family.

  Once I’m done showering, I shut the water off and make me way out of the tub to dry meself off. Walking butt naked into me room, I go straight to the closet to grab a pair of jeans and pull them on. Finding a button up, I throw it on and make me way to the dresser to finish getting ready.

  Once I’m ready, I make me way out to me car and take off towards her work. As soon as I pull into the parking lot, I see her open the door. She looks around a little before she finds me car. Getting out, I walk around the car and meet her in front of it.

  “Banphrionsa,” I murmur, grabbing her hand and pulling her into me. Her breath catches, and she looks up at me with a smile.

  “Hi,” she whispers. I lean forward and press me mouth against hers. “I hope I didn’t interrupt something important.”

  “No. I was just at me gaff. Nothing important.” Me hand runs up and down her back as her hands rest on me stomach.

  “Gaff?” Her pronunciation of the word is way off, but it’s cute that she’s even trying to say the word.

  “Home.” I smile at her, and she blushes. “Come on let me take to yer gaff.” She nods her head, and I kiss her once more before I walk her over to the passenger side and help her in. Talking off, I drive us to her gaff and pull into a free parking space.

  As we make our way up the four flights of stairs, I can see her looking at me every few seconds. When we get to the door, I can’t hold back any longer. Grabbing her around the waist, I pull her body to mine and then press her up against her door. Kissing her lips, I press me hips into hers and pin her to the door. Her soft moan turns me on, and I don't know how much more I can take. I want her so damn bad.

  A throat clears behind us, and she giggles against me lips. I grab her doorknob and turn it, but we don't budge. She starts to laugh more and pulls her keys out of her purse. She hands them to me, and I quickly unlock the door, pushing her inside. Slamming the door shut behind us, I walk her backward until we hit the back of the couch.

  Lifting her up, I set her on the back of the couch and press me lips against her neck and kiss me way down towards the little cleavage she has showing. She reminds me of a good girl until I get me hands on her.

  My hands trail down her sides, and I slide them under her sweater. Grabbing the bottom of her sweater, I pull it up and over her head, tossing it on the ground behind me. I don't care about taking it slow right now. The only thing that is running through me brain right now is getting her out of her knickers and shagging her. Feck, what I wouldn't do to get her on me dick.

  Just as I start to undo her bra, me phone starts to ring. Groaning, I drop me forehead against hers. She’s panting, and her eyes are closed. Reaching into me pocket, I pull out me phone and look down at the screen. Feck. It’s Niall. Hitting the answer button, I put the phone against me ear and wait fer him to say something.

  “Where ye at boyo?” His words piss me off, and I bite back the response that is on the tip of me tongue.

  “I’m a little busy,” I bite out. “What the feck do ye need?” Looking down at the angel in front of me, me body tenses as I wait fer his answer.

  “We are to be doing collections, or did ye forget?” I curse under my breath and close me eyes. Pulling the phone away from me ear, I see that it’s almost six. Feck me. Time fecking flew by, and I already need to head out.

  “Aye, I’ll be there in a minute,” I growl in the phone. I’m fecking pissed that I won’t be getting to see what else is under these baggy clothes. Ever since the attack, I’ve noticed her new duds. No longer does she wear the leggings and fitted sweaters.

  Hanging up, I pocket me phone and sigh. Our foreheads
are still touching, but she doesn't say anything. Her breathing is still a little erratic, and I love that. “I’m sorry,” I murmur, kissing her forehead. “I’ve got to go.” She slowly nods her head against mine, but she doesn't say a word. “I’ll text ye later,” I state before I pull her mouth up to mine and kiss her deeply.

  She doesn't move to put her sweater back on, but she does watch me make me way to the door. “Be careful.” Her voice is strained, almost like she doesn't know why she is even saying the words.

  “I will.” I open the door and walk through the doorway, shutting the door between us.

  Five

  Stana

  My heart is still pounding ten minutes after he walked out the door. I don’t know what it is about him that makes me do stupid things. I shouldn’t want him the way I do, and I shouldn’t let him kiss me that way. When I finally get my body under control, I bend down to grab my sweater and pull it back over my head.

  Walking over to the couch, I take a seat on the worn cushion and stare at the blank wall. There is nothing personal about my apartment and in a way it calms me. It helps me remember that everything can be gone in the blink of an eye. I could pack up tomorrow and leave this town and any other town for that matter. I typically don’t sit on a place very long, but something about Jerick makes me want to stay.

  This isn’t good. I shouldn’t want to stay, I’ve never stayed. Well, I guess I stayed once and look what that got me. Broken trust and a heart full of regret. My mind flashes back to when I thought we were happy, but it crashed down on the floor and took me down with it. I thought he loved me. Heck, I thought I loved him too.

  “Stana, where the fuck are you?” His voice calls out from by the front door. He just walked through the door after being at work all day. When he reaches me, I can see the scowl on his face. His eyes are bloodshot, and he’s stumbling. He must have stopped at the bar on his way home tonight.

  “When I ask you a question, I want a damn answer,” he yells. I shrink back, and my eyes widen. Rhett has never once yelled at me or anything like this before. God, what could I have done to make him so mad?

  “I’m sorry,” I whisper into the bedroom. I’ve spent most of the day doing laundry and cleaning our room, so I didn’t even think to make my way to the living room when he arrived today.

  The distance between us closes quickly, and I can see the anger written all over his face. The crack of his hand hitting my skin startles me, and when I look up, I see the regret and pain written all over his face. My cheek burns and the sting is nothing compared to the hurt I feel inside my chest. My hand goes to my face, and I hold my cheek.

  “I’m so sorry baby,” he quickly states, pulling me into his strong arms. I’m still in shock and can’t even process what just happened. He wouldn’t hit me, but apparently, he would. He did. A warm tear slides down my face, and I’m shocked that it’s even happening.

  He pulls my face into his chest, and he starts to whisper in my ear. “I’ll never hurt you again. I am so sorry baby.” I don’t say a word. I just let him hold me as a part of me goes numb.

  My mind flashes back to the present when I hear the foreign sound of the phone beeping in my bag. Walking over to where I left the bag, I pull out the phone and check the screen. When I see his name on it, I start to feel the butterflies in my stomach go crazy. He shouldn’t make me feel this way. I don’t even know him, and I have no idea what to do about it.

  Jerick: I want to see you after I’m done tonight.

  Flicks of memories to the way his mouth felt against mine have me squeezing my legs together. God, what am I doing? My fingers trail over the buttons on the screen, and I hit the reply button and type out a message back to him.

  Me: Okay.

  I don’t say anything more because honestly, I don’t know what else to say. I’m so far out of my league with him. Just looking at him, I know he isn’t the type of guy I’ve ever gone after. His demeanor is dark and deadly but soft at the same time. Gah! There is something wrong with me. I shake my head at myself and thoughts of Rhett come back into my mind. He was nothing like Jerick, but look how that turned out. Maybe I’m destined to be with crazy men.

  He doesn’t write me back, and it doesn’t bother me. Instead, I go into the kitchen and make a T.V. dinner that was still in the freezer. After I eat and feed the devil cat, I make my way into my bedroom to grab some clean clothes so I can shower. Once I get out and dry off, I spend time putting lotion all over my body before slipping my sleep shorts and a tank top on.

  Walking through to my room, I pull the comforter down and slide between the sheets. Grabbing the remote from the small tattered nightstand, I turn it on and wait for the T.V. light to glow before I shut my lights off. The purring monster comes and jumps on the bed not long after I turn on Netflix and settle in against the pillows.

  The show blurs after a while, and I find myself fast asleep.

  A hand presses against my belly and I freak out. Trying to pull away from the hand, I all but fall off the bed and onto the floor with a loud thump. Hearing the sound of his deep chuckle calms me enough to not reach for the baseball bat I have sitting next to the bed.

  His footsteps come towards me, and I hold my breath as I wait for him to come closer. “Ye okay Banphrionsa?” he asks when he gets within a foot of me. Leaning down, he puts his hands under my body, lifting me up and into his arms. I have no choice but to wrap my arms around his neck and hold onto him as he puts me back in my bed.

  “You scared the crap out of me,” I mutter, looking away from him. He doesn’t say anything else as he gets into my bed. “Wait, how did you get in here? I locked all the windows and the door.” I look around and don’t see anything out of place, and that makes me even more nervous than before. Maybe he’s a thief, and that’s why he left in a hurry earlier.

  “Ye apartment isn’t that safe, love.” His words are matter-of-factly, and that doesn’t make me feel good.

  “So anyone can get in like…” I pause and swallow the lump in my throat. What if the man who attacked me can get in just as easily as Jerick got in? “What if he comes back?” I shudder, and he wraps his arms around me pulling my body into his as he tucks me into him.

  “The fecker won’t come near ye,” he whispers into the dark room. The only light we have is the soft glow of the T.V. “I’ll take care of ye.” He presses a kiss to the top of my head, and I close my eyes.

  “What if you aren’t around and he finds me?” My panic is getting the best of me. I can’t control it.

  “He won’t banphrionsa. I won’t let anyone hurt ye.” I bury my face into the crook of his neck while he just holds me. After a while, I feel my body start to melt into his embrace, and it scares me. I shouldn’t trust this stranger, yet I do. I’ve let him into my apartment, into my mind, and now into my bed. The only explanation is that I must be going insane.

  His fingers trail up and down my back in the most soothing way, and soon I’m fast asleep.

  Waking up sometime later, I feel a massive arm draped across my waist, and when I try to move out from under it, it grips me tighter. Turning, I come face to face with the handsome man sleeping next to me. The room is still dark when I glance at the clock. The time reads four a.m.. He must have shown up some time after midnight at least. Maybe that’s when he gets off work…

  His regular deadly expression is softer and almost approachable while he sleeps. If I had met him anywhere else, I would have walked the other way. He scares me in a way, but at the same time, it’s like he pulls me in.

  Running my fingertip along his cheek and then across his lips, I watch him. His features never change, and part of me is glad for that. I don’t have a clue what I’m doing, and I’m nervous that when he wakes up, he’s going to want something from me. Not that I haven’t been thinking about it since he brought me home from work yesterday.

  His hand around me tightens as I run my fingers down his neck and towards his pecs. He doesn’t have a shirt on so his tattoos
are on full display.

  Growing up, my parents always told me that people who had tattoos were terrible and that I shouldn’t trust them. I believed it for a long time until I got to know some people who had ink. I’m pretty sure that some tattooed people are the most beautiful people I’ve ever met. Plus, if he was all that bad, why would he save a girl like me? I’m dull, average, boring. I am nothing spectacular, and I still don’t understand why he’s kissed me multiple times or why he’s even here right now. Sometimes I sound like a crazy person in my own head. He probably just wants to have sex with me and then his fascination will disappear.

  Maybe I can just give him what he wants so I can get on with my life. I need to move again. It’s probably not safe for me here anymore. My attention is drawn back to his beautiful face, and I run my finger over the skin between his eyebrows. For once, he doesn’t look stressed or worried. I notice the heart tattoo on his chest, and my fingers itch to touch it. It looks so real and detailed. Just as my hand reaches out to touch it, his hand grabs mine.

  I jump back a little, but I don’t go far. His grip on me is tight, and I’m being pressed against his hard body. “What are ye doing?” His voice is sleepy and rough, making me wet between my thighs. I’m in so much trouble with him right here in my bed.

  “I was just admiring your tattoo.” He releases my hand, and I tentatively move my hand towards his chest and the tattoo. My fingers brush against the ink that stains his skin. The heart is detailed and lifelike. His eyes follow my hand, but he doesn’t say anything. “Does it mean something?” I ask, slowly pulling my hand away from his skin.

  “Aye. I got it a few years ago.” He doesn’t say anything more, and the only conclusion I can come to is that it was because of a woman. Men don’t talk about tattoos they got for other women. Not that I would really want to know that he loved someone else before. Gah! Why would I even care that he loved another woman? There is definitely something wrong with me.