Awakening

by Hayes, Olivia

  "It isn't that I don't want you, because I'd like nothing better than to bury myself inside you right now. But I don't want just sex Caroline. I've wanted you to be a part of my life since the first time I saw you all those years ago, and you're finally here. It would be impossible for me to sleep with you and let you walk away," he said gruffly. "I can't let you go again. I won't."

  I looked up at him, sad, aroused, hopeful. A moment later he knelt down behind me wordlessly. My senses were heightened by his proximity. I waited as long as I could for him to do something, but when nothing happened, I turned to him. Again, he said nothing, but he lifted my hand and placed it palm side down over his heart, a silent offering for me to take what I would and leave the rest intact. It was apparent that he wanted me as much as I wanted him. For once I just followed my heart.

  I slid my arms around his waist and up over the muscles in his back, pulling myself against him. I looked into his eyes, trying to convey my desire for him without words. I pressed up onto my knees and slowly touched my mouth to his. That was all the motivation he needed to take over.

  In one fluid motion he had me on my feet, pulled the borrowed t-shirt over my head and hauled me up against him once more. He kissed me like he could never get enough and I matched him as best as I could. My belly was on fire for his touch but I couldn't get close enough to him this way. Forcibly, I pushed myself away from him and pulled my sports bra over my head revealing my full breasts to his hungry eyes.

  "Beautiful," he whispered.

  In two steps his mouth was on me. His tongue was incredible, flicking over one nipple and then the other until I strained against him.

  He set me down long enough to remove my bike shorts and panties, and then sat on the loveseat and pulled me down on top of him, straddling his thighs like earlier. When did he have time to remove his shorts?

  My bare skin burned where it pressed against his chest and thighs. The thick length of his manhood stood at attention against my exposed flesh. I was grinding against him, willing him to end my torment.

  "Luke, please."

  We were eye to eye. His lust filled emerald depths questioning me silently one last time. I answered him with a kiss and he slowly pushed into me, filling me inch by glorious inch. Shockwaves rocked through my body. A moan escaped me as he sat still, allowing me a moment to adjust to his size. He trailed kisses across my collarbone and down to my breasts again. When I pitched against him with desire he began to move with slow steady strokes, increasing in speed and intensity.

  I was in heaven, every nerve ending in my body singing along to his rhythm. I felt the muscles in his back working, his biceps flexing as he cupped my bottom and drove into me. All my fears, insecurities and inhibitions were gone in that moment. There was nothing else but Luke and the wonderful feelings he was drawing out of me.

  A tingling sensation radiated through my limbs as the heat began to build at my center. I leaned back, placing my hands on his knees, pulling him deeper as I increased the pace. He adjusted the angle so I could feel him more fully, bringing him in contact with the most sensitive area of my upper wall. My arms almost buckled at the blinding pleasure that ripped through me, but Luke was there, grabbing my wrists, helping me maintain the position that was driving me higher and higher.

  I could feel sweet fire beginning to pulse through me, building and churning. He released my wrists and reclaimed his grip on my ass as he thrust into me powerfully, sending me skyrocketing towards release. As I contracted around him, I arched my back and dug my nails into his shoulders, calling out his name. He slowed, letting me ride wave after wave of delicious ecstasy.

  "That was... incredible," I managed breathlessly.

  I rested my head on his shoulder, trying to steady my ragged breathing and calm my racing heart.

  After a moment, he slipped out of me and I felt the loss immediately. I sat back and looked at him, a sheen of sweat on his brow and across his chest. I leaned in to kiss him and felt fire burning in my belly again. He had taken the edge off, but I didn't feel sated. I wanted more.

  As soon as the thought entered my head, I realized I could feel him still hard against my inner thigh. I looked at him with question in my eyes.

  "That," he said, kissing my nose. "Was just for you. The next one will be for both of us."

  My body hummed with excitement at his words. He stood with me and carried me to the cot, laying me down and covering my body with his.

  He kissed me languidly, as if savoring it and then made his way to my breasts. I writhed beneath him, feeling the tension building in me as his tongue flicked it's way around one nipple and then the other. I wanted him back inside me and I angled my hips as if trying to capture him. Finally, when I thought I would lose my mind, he had mercy on me and pushed at my entrance. He slid in just a little, teasing me. I could feel his muscles tense as I wrapped my legs around him, urging him deeper with my heels, but he pulled back.

  My need for him had intensified tenfold in the last few minutes. I had never felt this much yearning before and I needed to be full of him again. I felt like I was going to explode and I wanted him fast and hard.

  "Luke, please..." I whimpered, undulating my hips, trying to get some friction.

  He paused and looked at me for a moment, as I tried to convey my need with my eyes.

  "Tell me what you want Savannah."

  "You inside me..."

  He smirked.

  "You can do better than that. How do you want it?" He teased.

  Damn, is he really going to make me say it out loud? Again I tried to raise my hips, showing him, but he held me in place. I was growing frustrated, but by the look in his eye, he wasn't going to do anything else until I asked for it. Oh, what the hell!

  "I want you to fuck me," I whispered.

  "What was that?"

  "FUCK ME!" I shouted at him, my heart racing as I cried out words I never thought I'd say.

  No sooner were the words out of my mouth than he drove into me, burying himself to the hilt. I moaned into his shoulder at the incredible sensation of him stretching me. He thrust into me, once, twice. When he left again, I cried out in agony.

  He wrestled an arm under my waist and flipped me over, jerking my hips towards his and slamming back into me. I convulsed in sheer bliss, grinding against him and matching his pace. He was amazing. I had never felt anything so intensely in my life. My skin tingled as he took me mercilessly; giving me exactly what I asked for, and burning me down in the process. Just as I thought I couldn't possibly take any more, he reached around to rub his fingers over my swollen clit bringing me to the brink and then pausing, over and over, building and rebuilding the intensity until I thought I might explode if he didn't give me release. I was teetering on the edge of sanity, caught up in the excruciatingly acute pleasure he was building, when he finally plunged into me one last time, sending me spiraling into oblivion. He let out a guttural sound joining me somewhere between pleasure and pain and collapsed on top of me, spent.

  He rolled to my side and I kissed his temple as I ran my hands through his hair. For several minutes we laid there trying to calm our breathing, before he rolled to his feet, picking me up and carried me back to the rug. He spread our blanket on the floor in front of the fire and found another in the wardrobe I had missed earlier. We settled down between the blankets.

  I laid my head on his chest, trying to find the right words to say. I felt amazing, and I stretched my sated body against him, relishing the hard planes of his body.

  "How was that?" He asked with a hint of arrogance.

  I smiled into his side.

  "Eh, I've had better," I joked.

  "Oh really? What was that you said earlier? 'Luke, please... fu-,'" he started, failing to pull off a good imitation of my voice as I elbowed him in the ribs.

  He brushed my salty, sweat laden hair away from my face and kissed me on the forehead.

  "Seriously though," I moved to look at him. "It was..." I searched for words. "
Indescribably good."

  His face broke into a huge grin.

  "It was, wasn't it?

  Giggling, I curled into him as we both drifted off to sleep.

  ~~~~

  I woke during the wee hours of the morning. My bladder was full and my hip was killing me from laying on the hard floor in one position for several hours. Luke's arm was heavy over my waist, and as I tried to slip out from under him and the blankets, he rolled on his back, turning his face towards me. Dark lashes fell over his tanned cheeks, and a day's worth of stubble graced his jaw. His muscular shoulders peeked out from the blanket as his upper chest rose and fell with his breaths. He really was beautiful; I could look at him for hours.

  While I was washing my hands in the bathroom I peeked out the little window to see the clear night sky. The storm had finally moved out. As I was turning to dry my hands I couldn't be sure, but I thought I saw a shape move behind the bushes. I shivered, and walked back to the small window, looking out into the night. I saw it again, the shape of a man! Someone was out there.

  "Luke!" I whisper yelled, throwing open the bathroom door.

  "What is it?" He asked groggily, sitting up.

  "There's someone sneaking around outside! I saw them through the bathroom window!"

  He was on his feet in an instant, grabbing his shorts and pulling them on over his nakedness. He rummaged in a kitchen drawer, grabbing and checking a flashlight for batteries.

  "You stay here," he whispered. "Don't come out, no matter what you hear."

  He turned to open the door.

  "Luke!" I called to him and he looked back at me. "Please be careful."

  I waited for several tense minutes, trying to see through the dirty glass of the windows at the front of the cabin, but I couldn't make out anything. Another few minutes later I heard a board creak near the front and I stood stiffly against the wall as the front door swung open. When I saw Luke walk in, I let out a big breath.

  "Did you see anything?" I asked, crossing to him.

  "I thought I heard something, but when I swung the light on it, it was gone. I'll have to check again in the morning, see if I see any footprints."

  Luke put the flashlight down on the table and grabbed my upper arms. I hadn't thought to cover myself and his eyes travelled from my face all the way down to my feet, taking their time to devour me on their way down.

  "Hey you," he said, shrugging out of his shorts again. "Let's get back under the blanket."

  I giggled as we walked back to our makeshift bed. I laid down, resting my head on his chest as his fingers began to trace a lazy trail along my back as mine made circles across his abdomen.

  "I can't believe this is what we were missing all that time," I whispered.

  He squeezed me closer and kissed the top of my head. "I think I'm falling for you," he said, matter-of-factly.

  I stopped breathing and my heart jumped into my throat.

  "Savannah, I've loved you from the first moment we met," he started again. "You were just sitting there in the yard, trying to distract yourself from whatever argument was taking place inside the house... You looked so sweet and innocent and I just wanted to protect you. The summers we spent together are some of the best memories of my life." He trailed off and then started again. "I spent years pretending that every girl I was with was you. Trying to forget that you weren't mine. Then after Mark's death, I realized how little time we actually have on this earth and I started to put my life back together. I never thought I would see you again after that, but now that you're here, I don't ever want to let go again."

  My heart was singing at his words. It was probably one of the nicest and most sincere things anyone had ever said to me in my life. This man was beautiful, honest and real and he deserved everything he was looking for and more. I didn't know if I would ever be able to give him what he wanted, but I wanted to try and he deserved to hear the truth about my feelings for Mark.

  "Luke, I loved you too, from the moment we met. Then, when I thought I didn't have you, I turned to Mark, and he was there for me. I fell in love with him too. I couldn't picture my life without him. To have something like that ripped away from you so suddenly... There are no words to describe it. He was my life, and then he was just gone."

  I searched his eyes for understanding.

  " The day he died I started having recurring dreams about him. Over the last two years I have literally counted the hours each day until I go to bed, wishing for sleep to come so I can visit with him. I haven't been able to let him go completely. He haunts me, and I don't know if I will ever have my whole heart to give again," I added.

  Luke looked at me with sympathy.

  "I understand losing someone that special. He was my brother after all. But he's gone, and it's just me here now. I've had dreams too, about you, and as much as I wanted them to be real, they weren't. They're just desires."

  A single tear fell as I tried to explain the unexplainable. There was no way I could give Luke what he deserved when Mark was still taking up all the space in my heart. I laid back down on his chest, willing the morning light to stay away for a little longer since I knew it would bring change.

  June 23, 2013

  I awoke again several hours later. The sun was coming up and Luke was stretching beside me. I reached for the t-shirt he had so hastily discarded last night and slipped it over my head quickly. I picked up my clothes, which were dry now, and went into the bathroom to change.

  I looked at myself in the mirror. You are done for. I had just had the best night of my life. I was sure to be thinking about it often. I never expected the mind blowing encounter I had experienced. I splashed some water on my face before putting my clothes back on, hoping that the flush on my face wouldn't be obvious to him.

  When I came out, Luke had put his shorts back on and folded the blankets. "Good morning, beautiful, I checked around the cabin and I think maybe I found a couple of footprints, but everything was so wet last night, it's really hard to tell," he said.

  "Well, hopefully it was nothing then." I walked over to him, snuggling against his chest. We fit so well against each other that I felt like I belonged there. "Thanks for an amazing day and an even more incredible night."

  He exhaled. "Back to reality?" He asked and I nodded against his chest.

  When we pulled up to my grandmother's house we were both alarmed by the scene. There was a huge oak tree laying across the front porch. One of the columns was damaged and a corner of the roof was bashed in.

  I jumped out of the truck, racing towards the house. "Mom!? Dad!? Is everyone okay?" I shouted.

  Both of my parents rounded the side of the house at the same time, immediately easing my worry.

  "We're fine," my father assured me. "The wind brought this old tree down. Nick and Ben were by this morning with the girls and have run back to their place to get a chainsaw."

  I nodded, relieved that everyone was alright.

  "Mr. Foster, I'm Luke Johnson," he said, walking up behind me to shake my father's hand.

  "Please, call me Jack. It's nice to meet you, Allison has told me a lot about you," my dad said, smiling at Luke.

  "All good I hope."

  My dad smiled again. "So, what do you think?"

  I watched Luke transform into the architect he was, surveying the damage and trying to determine what was salvageable.

  "Well," he said after a few minutes of contemplation. "It looks like the support beam is cracked here, so you'll likely have to tear the whole porch out and start from scratch. I can draft something up for you, if you'd like some ideas."

  "That would be excellent. The front door was smashed in too. I think it was oak, but it has a huge crack down the center, so I'm sure we're going to need to replace that as well."

  "I'll bring you some sketches in the morning," said Luke, turning back to me. "Well, I better get to it then. Duty calls. See you soon?"

  "Bye Luke. Thank you for yesterday," I said, hugging him tightly.

&nbs
p; He planted a chaste kiss on my cheek and I managed to keep my emotions in check until he drove away. As soon as he was out of sight I let out a huge breath. The pain in my chest was overwhelming and my tears started flowing as I thought about the things I would never share with Luke. He deserved someone whose heart was free.

  "Good Lord, Caroline," my father said. "What's wrong?"

  "Dad, can I borrow your car? I need to get away for a little while," I managed.

  "Of course you can honey. Your mom can drive me in to the office tomorrow."

  Thirty minutes later I had packed the essentials and was in the car, heading out of town and away from Luke. I knew he would be angry when he found out I left, but I didn't know what else to do. I needed to put space between us and clear my head.

  When I arrived back at my parents house, I turned the car off and sat in the driveway warring with myself over whether I should get out or turn around and drive back. I wanted to be with Luke, to feel his arms around me. It's all I could think about the whole way home. He elicited feelings in me I hadn't felt in so long, some not ever. I had a searing guilt over tarnishing Mark's memory by sleeping with his brother, and I knew Luke deserved more than I could give him.

  I rested my head on the steering wheel as the tears came. I felt like I had made a mess of the whole situation. I never should have kissed him at the bar. I certainly shouldn't have kissed him in the cabin, and I damn sure shouldn't have asked him to sleep with me. Although, God, I had wanted it. And it was wonderful; better than I could have dreamed. I smiled faintly, remembering. The soreness of my inner thighs still a stark reminder of my actions.

  I dried the tears off my face and grabbed my bag from the back seat. Once I was in the house I decided I needed to distract myself from thoughts of Mark and Luke. After taking a shower to wash all the sand and salt away, I put on my iPod and started cleaning the house. By the time I was done I was exhausted, but the toilets shined and the floors sparkled. I even made myself a lunch and ironed my clothes for work the next day. I twisted my hair into a bun and rinsed off again, just so I would feel clean when I crawled between my sheets. I was asleep before my head hit the pillow.