A Fine Mess

by Hughes, Breanna

Harper’s half smile turned into a full-fledged grin, which soon led to some intense blushing. She dug through her bag and grabbed a pen and an old receipt from the Cheesecake Factory and began to write down a series of numbers she rarely made public.

  “Here’s my number,” she said while handing him the receipt. “If you call, I just might answer.”

  Finn took the piece of paper and watched as Harper ran off to join Sarah in their hunt for the car. He took out his cell phone and immediately began to input the numbers. To him, there was really no sense in waiting three days to call this one. Not when she had such a tight grip around his heart upon their first encounter. She would simply have to learn to live with his tenacity.

  ***

  “I don’t care if he’s rich, he’s still a douchebag,” yelled Kiley as she came in from the storage room with Erin close behind her.

  “I know, but he told me he really cares about me,” replied Erin.

  “Before or after he went home to his wife?”

  Erin lowered her head. “Before.”

  Kiley could see Erin wasn’t in the mood to talk about yet another soon-to-be-defunct relationship. “Just be careful, okay? We can’t have another incident where I have to come pick you up in Venice at 2am filled with tears and missing your shoes.”

  “That won’t happen again. I promise.”

  Kiley was about to say something, but a familiar face at the bar made her forget what her next snarky comment was going to be. “Um…do you mind grabbing table eleven? I have to go take care of something.”

  Erin looked over at Finn. “Sure.”

  “Hey stranger.” Kiley gave Finn a half-hearted hug.

  “Hey.”

  “What brings you here?”

  “Actually, I was looking for Harper. Have you seen her?”

  Kiley held her tongue for a moment. “No. I haven’t.”

  “Well, she’s not answering her phone and I really wanted to talk to her.”

  “Did you try her house?”

  “Yeah, but obviously that was a bust.”

  “Why?”

  “Well…because it’s empty.”

  “What do you mean it’s empty,” asked Kiley.

  Finn cocked his head to the side. “When was the last time you talked to Harper?”

  Kiley shrugged. She didn’t want to tell him it had been over a month since they had spoken.

  “Well, I guess I didn’t expect her to tell me she was moving,” said Finn.

  Kiley had a hard time controlling her visceral reaction to Finn’s matter-of-fact statement. She felt as though someone was choking her and she was fighting for air.

  “Oh yeah. That.”

  “You DID know she moved, right? I mean, her whole house is empty.”

  Kiley’s heart rapidly beating faster. She was too taken aback to answer Finn.

  “Anyway, can you do me a favor and give this to her?” He handed her an envelope similar to the one he dropped in Susan’s mailbox. “It’s a letter. Don’t, like, read it or anything.”

  Kiley shook her head. She was still in shock, but was lucid enough to realize how rude she was being. “Did you want a drink? It’s on the house.”

  “No thanks. Actually, I should get going. I have a long drive ahead of me.”

  “Long drive? Where are you going?”

  “Wow, I figured Emily would have told Harper this. I’m surprised she didn’t tell you. I’m going to Seattle.”

  “For how long?”

  “Indefinitely. I got a job out there.”

  “You’re moving? Why am I always the last to know things?”

  “I’m leaving tonight.”

  “Oh, my God. Well, come here!” She pulled him in for another hug. This one had more warmth and meaning behind it. “You’re really gonna leave without seeing Harper?”

  “I was hoping to talk to her in person, but I’m already behind schedule.”

  “And this is your goodbye letter to her?”

  Finn shrugged. “Yeah, I guess you could call it that.”

  Kiley gripped the envelope. As selfish as it sounded, she was thrilled that she now had an excuse to call Harper.

  Finn watched Kiley’s troubled face, unsure of what exactly she was thinking about. He reached into his pocket, grabbed his keys and nervously twirled them around his finger. He couldn’t quite look Kiley in the eye. “So, take care of her, okay?”

  “Harper? Of course. Always.” Just as soon as she starts speaking to me again, thought Kiley.

  “I mean it,” stated Finn. “She deserves to be happy, after all this. Even if I can’t be the one to do it. So, make her happy, Kiley. Okay?”

  It took a moment, but Kiley finally began to realize exactly what he was referring to. She supposed it didn’t take a genius to figure it out. Finn had managed to solve the mystery. Which obviously meant that she and Harper hadn’t been too successful in masking their emotions all these years.

  Kiley stared at Finn with her mouth agape. “I…” She closed her eyes and nodded. It was all she could do. Words evidently were not her friend at the moment.

  “Take care of yourself, Kiley.”

  Kiley nodded again and barely managed string together two words. “Good luck.”

  As Finn walked out the door, Kiley carefully studied the envelope in her trembling hand.

  ***

  Finn’s view from his rearview mirror was slightly obstructed from all his belongings packed in the backseat of his car. He managed to catch a glimpse of the city lights as he headed north on the 5 freeway. His heart began to sink, but he took pleasure in not knowing what was ahead of him. A contented smile crept across his face as he left behind the town he called home for the last eight years.

  CHAPTER 32

  Kiley hadn’t moved from her spot since Finn left. Her hand was beginning to get sweaty from gripping the envelope so tightly. Little did she know that Graham had been watching her for the past few minutes.

  “You know, it would be nice if, just for one day, you would do more than five minutes of work during your shift. Is that really too much to ask?”

  Kiley looked at Graham, her face devoid of any emotion. Obviously something was wrong. He had never seen her face so vacant. “Are you okay?”

  Kiley looked down at the envelope.

  “Was that Finn? What did he say to you? What’s going on?” Graham took a seat at one of the bar stools as he studied her devastated look.

  Kiley’s hand began to shake. Soon, her whole body was shaking. Graham took notice of this and reached out to take the envelope from her hand.

  “It’s for Harper,” said Kiley. “Finn’s leaving. Tonight. He wanted me to…” Her voice trailed off. Suddenly she felt sick; never before had she felt so physically ill. Harper had moved. She moved without telling her best friend, which led Kiley to believe that maybe it really was over. Maybe Harper had finally had enough of Kiley’s fickle heart. Just the thought of Harper not being in her life was enough to make her want to fall to her knees, and she would have if the bar weren’t holding her up. She looked at Graham with an innocent, almost pleading gaze.

  “Did you know?”

  “Did I know what?”

  “That she moved.”

  Graham put the envelope down on the bar and began to tap his fingertips on the mahogany. “She mentioned it.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “I didn’t know she was serious. She said it was a possibility, but I never thought she’d actually go through with it.”

  “Well, Finn said she did. And she hasn’t returned my phone calls, so it’s not like I’ve been in the know.”

  Graham sat quietly, not knowing exactly what to say. He had been watching this train wreck play out for months now. Even years. But he always stayed out of it. It was none of his business what went on between those two, but there was obviously something there.

  Kiley’s gaze turned into a thousa
nd-yard stare. Everything she had been feeling since that kiss at Seth’s party had been culminating. Leading up to this very moment where she felt like if one more emotion took hold of her, she would implode–her raw nerves vulnerable and exposed.

  “What am I so afraid of, Graham?”

  Graham shook his head and placed his hand on Kiley’s. “I don’t know. But if you need to, take the rest of the night off. Clear your head.”

  “Are you sure?”

  Graham nodded. Clearly, she was in no shape to work right now.

  Kiley looked over at Erin, who had tuned into the last half of their conversation.

  Erin nodded. “Go. I’ll take care of things here.”

  Kiley grabbed the envelope and headed toward the door. She had no idea how she would find her, but she had to at least try.

  Before she walked out, Graham offered up one helpful piece of information. “She’s performing at The Fortress tonight. 11pm. I have a friend over there. Helped her book the gig a couple weeks ago.”

  Kiley gave Graham a little side smile, ran over to him and gave him a hug.

  “You really are a great guy, Graham.”

  ***

  Harper showed up to her gig at The Fortress a bit early, but she wanted to be prepared and familiarize herself with the venue. At least, that’s what she told herself. She also just wanted a break from everything that was happening and surround herself with some good music. Her life had been in complete upheaval in the last two months. This was the first sense of normalcy she’d had in a while and she was glad to get back to doing what she loves best. It was a new place with a new crowd and, thanks to tonight being an all ages night, her sister was by her side. They settled into a booth near the back and watched the opening acts. Harper had no idea Emily was crushing on the guy singing on stage at the moment and Emily had no idea that Harper was using every ounce of strength she had to not call Kiley and at least extend an invitation to the show.

  ***

  The tires on Kiley’s car screeched to a halt along the curb. She barely put her car in park before she leapt out and ran up the walkway. She stopped halfway when the streetlight revealed the “Sold” sign ominously displayed on the lawn. Kiley dismally meandered up to the front door. She stood on her toes and tried to peek into the glass window on the door. It wasn’t the most ideal vantage point so, like some sort of night prowler, she made her way over to the window to her left. The blinds were pulled up and she put her hands on either side of her face to look through the window into what used to be Harper’s living room. The couch and TV were gone and only two chairs remained, but they were covered by a tarp. The lights in the house were off, but the streetlights coupled with the moon helped to illuminate the scene in front of her. Her heart suddenly felt as empty as this big house. Unfortunately, the light revealed a little too much for her liking. She would have given anything for a blackout at the moment or the dark cloak of a moonless sky, anything to prevent her from seeing what she was seeing right now. She was hoping it wasn’t actually true. Kiley had it in her mind that maybe Finn was wrong and maybe Graham was lying. She had clung onto a sliver of hope that her best friend hadn’t up and moved without even telling her. That hope was now completely obliterated.

  Kiley backed away from the window onto the grass. She fell to her knees right there on Harper’s front lawn, then sat down facing the street and brought her knees up to her chin. It didn’t make any sense. How could she move just like that? Harper loved this house and everything it stood for. Kiley weighed the possible reasons for Harper’s decision. Maybe it got too hard having to live with the constant memory of her parents. Maybe now that Emily’s back, Harper feels she can finally let go and move on. Maybe by moving, Harper wanted to start over, without Kiley in her life. Before Kiley’s imagination ran rampant, the headlights of a car in the distance caught her attention. As the sound of the engine grew closer, she perked up, holding on to the slim chance that it might be Harper. It wasn’t. She knew it wasn’t. The car drove by without even tapping on the brakes. Kiley sighed and fell back to lie down on the grass. With the tall green blades tickling her neck, she looked up and watched the night sky come alive with stars, each one shining their faint light down upon her. Her tranquility was short-lived, however, when she remembered that Harper was somewhere out there and not here with her right now. Kiley grew increasingly nervous. Thanks to Graham, she knew exactly where to find her, but her body couldn’t seem to move from the grass. She was torn between that ever-present struggle between passion and fear. She sat up and looked back at the empty house. Kiley hated fear, especially the kind that was strong enough to paralyze someone. She did not want to be paralyzed. Not when she had something worth running to.

  ***

  When it was her turn to set up on stage, Harper plugged in her guitar and placed it on the stand to the right of the microphone. The guitar reverberated with a fuzzy sound escaping from it. Harper cleared her throat and checked the levels on the microphone. She stared out into the sea of people, their faces barely lit by the ambient light. It was in this moment Harper’s thoughts once again turned to Kiley, as they often did. She wondered what she was doing right now and wondered if she’d be proud of her for taking a giant leap of faith by performing at a club that was considered an impressive up-and-coming music venue. She wondered if Kiley would even care. Then her thoughts turned to instant regret for not telling her about this and for basically shutting her out completely. She knew it was for the best, though. Her vulnerable heart couldn’t take another thrashing. After extensive analysis and a little bit of quasi-therapy from her little sister, Harper decided that Kiley’s wavering heart had no place in her life. She only half-believed it, but made every effort to adhere to the decision, at least for the time being.

  Though at this very moment, Harper wanted to renege on her decision. She began to feel overwhelmed as her debut at The Fortress was quickly approaching. She now had five minutes to nut up and get herself together. She grabbed her set list from the guitar case and laid it on the floor next to the guitar stand using her bottled water as a paperweight. When she stood up she looked over at Emily, who was staring rather dumbfounded at someone who just walked in. She followed Emily’s line of vision and her eyes rested on a ghost. An apparition. A specter of some sort. That was the only explanation because there was no way that Kiley Young was actually standing twenty feet away sheepishly glancing from Harper to the floor. She watched as Kiley walked up to the stage.

  “Hi.”

  So it’s true, thought Harper. It really is her. “Hi,” replied Harper, unable to give Kiley full eye contact.

  “I need to talk to you.” Kiley’s voice was tentative, but firm.

  “I’m about to go on.”

  “Just give me a few minutes.” Kiley reached out and took Harper’s hand. “Please.” She needed to do this now before she lost whatever courage she was able to muster.

  Harper conceded and allowed Kiley to lead her outside. She waited while Kiley gathered her thoughts.

  “Look, I just…I wanted…” Kiley was struggling to get her words out. She wasn’t exactly a paragon of proper verbiage while under pressure and due to the time it was rather difficult to say everything she wanted to say in just five minutes. She reached into her back pocket and grabbed the one thing that could possibly save this conversation. “Finn wanted me to give this to you.”

  Harper took the envelope while carefully studying Kiley’s face. “Okay.”

  “Apparently he got a job in Seattle and he’s moving there. Today, actually.”

  Harper nodded. “I know. Emily told me a couple days ago.”

  “Oh.” Kiley was beginning to feel foolish knowing she was always the last to find out anything. “Well, he couldn’t find you. So he came by the bar and asked me to deliver it to you.”

  “Well, thanks.”

  They remained standing just outside the front entrance to the club, each of them waiting for the
other to say something. Kiley’s time was running out. And her once-thriving valor had quickly faded.

  “Well, good luck. I know you’ll do great,” offered Kiley, bringing chickening out to a whole new level.

  “Oh,” replied Harper. “Okay. Thanks.” Harper turned around and walked back into the bar. Kiley remained behind debating on whether to go in or to leave. She didn’t have too long to debate the issue because Harper came charging back out from the club.

  “That’s it? That’s all you’ve got for me?”

  “What?” Kiley was taken aback by Harper’s intensity.

  “You came all the way out here, sought me out after two months. Made me late for my set, and all you do is wish me luck?”

  “That’s not— “

  “Fuck you, Kiley! Fuck you.”

  Kiley was shaken by Harper’s words. It took a moment to find her footing. “Fuck you right back.” Not the cleverest comeback, but it would have to suffice.

  “Excuse me?”

  “You heard me. You moved out of your house without even telling me?”

  “Last I checked, you weren’t exactly talking to me either,” rebutted Harper.

  “You stormed out of my apartment.”

  “You let me.”

  “So I’m just supposed to run after you?”

  “If you really wanted me, you would have.”

  Kiley couldn’t help but think what a female thing that was for Harper to say. She had to remember, she was dealing with a female here, one that she had hurt beyond forgiveness.

  “I wanted to. Everything just happened so fast.”

  “Yeah, and that guy you screwed came back looking for seconds and…”

  “That’s not what happened and I didn’t have sex with him!” Kiley was having difficulty controlling the level of her voice.

  Harper threw her hands up. “Oh please, Kiley. That’s all you do. You fuck guys. And then you fuck some more. And you keep doing it, and you wear your promiscuity on your sleeve for everyone, mainly me, to see.”