Waiting for Autumn

by DeRouen, J. A.

  Autumn

  Present Day

  Haven, LA

  Aria crashes into my legs, a full body hug the second we hit the door of the shop. Seb’s right behind me, and I fall back into his chest. He wraps an arm around my shoulders and presses his lips to my temple, chuckling the entire time.

  “Good morning, poppet. I see Uncle Bray hasn’t gotten any better at fixing your hair.” I run my fingers through her wild curls but get stuck in a tangle of knots almost immediately.

  She looks up at me and grins. “I fixed my own hair.”

  “Ah, now that explains it.”

  Seb lets me go and crouches down to Aria’s level. “I think it looks beautiful.”

  She brushes it out of her eyes. “Fanks.”

  She taps his shoulder like she needs to grab his attention. Like he isn’t completely mesmerized and starstruck by the little girl in front of him.

  “I didn’t ask for my momma at all last night,” she whispers, raising his eyebrows like he should be impressed.

  “Not even once?” The tone of his voice is one-part humor, one-part disbelief.

  Aria flinches and scrunches her nose like she’s trying her hardest to remember.

  “Well, maybe one time, but it’s okay. I still get hot chocolate,” she says matter-of-factly like she makes the rules.

  Sebastian nods. Aria grins.

  She leans in, close to his ear, and whisper-yells, “You got star marshmallows here, too?”

  He nods again, and her grin grows even wider. She whips around and runs across the shop, a flurry of matted curls and glitter shoes. “Isaac, do you want star marshmallows?”

  Only then do I notice Sebastian’s nephew at a table in the far corner of the shop. Aria hops up on the chair beside him, stars in her eyes, Seb and me all but forgotten.

  “Wow, she really missed the hell out of me,” I mutter, shaking my head.

  Seb squeezes my shoulder and chuckles. “Yeah, Isaac walks on water as far as Aria is concerned. No way you could top that.”

  He gestures over to the counter where Brady and Lexi face each other in some sort of stare down. Lexi’s leaned over the counter, way in Brady’s space, eyes on fire.

  Shit, that girl’s scary. I flinch a tiny bit, even though her glare isn’t directed on me. Even though I’m way across the room. Yeah, she’s that intense.

  Seb walks over to Brady, and I follow closely behind, only hearing the last bit of their exchange.

  “I said it’s none of your fucking business, so back the hell off,” Lexi says through gritted teeth.

  “And what if I say it is?” Brady’s tone is more menacing than I’ve ever heard it.

  “Hey,” Seb interrupts, laying a hand on Brady’s shoulder. “What’s going on here?”

  Lexi stands and crosses her arms, ice replacing the blaze from moments before.

  “First-degree murder if you don’t get him the hell away from me.” Not a flinch, not even a hint that she’s joking. I honestly don’t think she is.

  My gaze lands on Brady’s shoulder just in time to see Sebastian squeeze much tighter than what could be considered friendly. Brady’s eyes dart to Seb’s, and he lets out a frustrated grunt.

  “You harassing my employees? I’ve already told you about this one, Brady. Her bite is just as ferocious as her bark.” He lowers his head, only slightly, and whispers, “Leave it alone, all right?”

  “Fine,” he says, expression looking like it’s anything but fine. He swipes his coffee off the counter and starts toward Aria and Isaac’s table.

  Lexi turns her back to us and stalks away.

  “What was that all about?”

  Sebastian’s expression lightens as he shrugs. “Who knows. Those two are like oil and water. Go ahead and have a seat with everyone, and I’ll fix our drinks.”

  I nod, quickly peck his mouth, and head toward the table. I turn back to see him disappear into the storeroom in the back.

  * * *

  “And you’re gonna live wif us?” Aria screeches, standing on the seat of her chair.

  “Poppet, sit down before you fall.”

  Instead of heeding my warning, she launches herself into Brady’s chest. He catches her with an oomph and returns her high-five.

  “I’ll be really close, I promise. But I can’t live with you, munchkin.” Aria’s shoulders slump, and her lips poke out in a dramatic pout. “Sorry, Aria, but those stairs aren’t Brady-friendly.”

  “Trust me, I lived with your uncle for nearly two decades. It’s not all it’s cracked up to be.” I nod slowly and make a disgusted face.

  Aria giggles.

  Brady does not.

  “I’m delightful,” he growls.

  “He eats all the food.”

  Aria squints her eyes at him. “Not cool, Uncle Bray.”

  “Stinky socks.”

  “Ewww.” She giggles when he tickles her side.

  “Poots.”

  She bursts out laughing, nearly falling out of the wheelchair, but Brady catches her by the arm before she makes the plunge. She settles back into his lap, cups her hand by his ear, and whisper-yells, “I poot, too.”

  Brady and I burst out laughing. Isaac is the one that blushes instead of Aria. She looks downright proud of herself.

  “But you say excuse me,” I say, just as Sebastian walks up with a handful of cups.

  “You gotta use your manners, Uncle Bray. Then you could live wif us.” She takes her hot chocolate from Seb with an excited grin. “Fanks.”

  “Stairs, munchkin, stairs. But I promise to find a place close to you so we can visit all the time. There’s a place I’m looking at this afternoon. Already modified and everything. I’m almost afraid to get my hopes up. It seems too good to be true.”

  “Wow, things are moving fast,” Seb says as he takes the seat next to mine and drapes an arm over my shoulder. I look to Aria for a reaction, but she doesn’t seem to have one. She just keeps sipping away at her drink.

  “The university wants the program up and running for spring semester, so we need to hit the ground running. As soon as I accepted the position, I put in a call to a realtor.” Brady shrugs and smiles nonchalantly. “And hey, if the place doesn’t work out, there’s wheelchair accessible housing on campus. I could always live there for a while if I needed to.”

  “I can’t believe this is happening. And that you kept it from me.” I shrug and roll my eyes. “I mean, yes, I would have been so disappointed if it hadn’t have worked out, so you were right to wait. But still.”

  “I’m happy for you, man,” Seb says, then squeezes my shoulder. “Hell, I’m happy for me, too. It’s like the old gang is back together.”

  “Plus a few additions.” I smile at Isaac, then turn my gaze to our daughter.

  Seb lifts his cup to Isaac, and grins. “Very welcome additions.”

  Isaac hits his cup to Seb’s with a sheepish grin, then takes a sip. This prompts a round of cup bumps from Aria, her having to hit everyone twice.

  With an overflowing heart, I take in each person sitting at our table. I never thought we’d get here. I never dared dream of it, for fear the wanting would overtake me. Sometimes coming full circle feels more triumphant than the place you originally started. Second chances are like first chances with a rearview mirror—you respect where you’ve been and know the future will be better for it.

  “What do your folks think of the move?”

  I bristle at Seb’s question, his words deflating my good mood in an instant.

  “Who cares what they think,” I mutter under my breath.

  “Eh, I’ve been living in Providence for years now. They’ve gotten used to me doing my own thing.”

  I scoff, knowing my parents will never get used to Brady doing his own thing. Before the accident, after the accident … it doesn’t even matter. He’s the dream my dad will never let go of. His dream, not Brady’s.

  “So how about this,” Brady says in an overly cheerful voice in an obvious atte
mpt to change the mood of the room. “Why don’t my two favorite girls come with me to see the house this afternoon?”

  I give a tight smile and nod while Aria cheers excitedly.

  And I don’t miss the serious looks exchanged between Seb and Brady.

  Chapter 38

  Present Day

  Sebastian

  Prosper, LA

  I roll into town as the morning dew is burning off the grass, leaving nothing but oppressive heat and the stifling judgment this shit town is known for.

  But I can’t find it in me to care anymore. It’s a pesky gnat buzzing around, but I can swat it away and move on, no problem. Old demons no longer hold me hostage. I feel freer than I ever have before, even within the confines of Prosper city limits. I feel like Jerry McGuire singing Tom Petty with the windows rolled down, one-handing the steering wheel, sporting a shit-eating grin.

  Now I just need to get Autumn to the same place. She thinks she’s there. She thinks she’s let go of all that’s happened and is ready for the future, but this anger and resentment for her parents will eat her from the inside out. I saw it plain as day at the coffee shop, and I want more for her. More for us.

  Their blatant dismissal of her, of our daughter, is abhorrent to me, and I can’t just let it stand. If they choose to continue on this way, I guess that’s their dumbass prerogative, but they will hear what I have to say.

  She may not thank me. Hell, she’ll probably be downright pissed, but I need to do what I can to help her move on from this.

  My timing is purposeful, mid-morning when I know Mr. Norris will be at the office, and hopefully, Mrs. Norris will be home alone.

  My phone dings in my pocket just as I pull over in front of their house and kill the ignition.

  Autumn: You’re picking Aria up from school today, right?

  Me: Yes. Ice cream and pool toy shopping, remember?

  Autumn: Meet up at your house after?

  Me: Our house?

  I chuckle, knowing she’s huffing as she reads my text. I’m relentless about what I want—she and Aria living with me—but we’ve lost enough time together already. When it comes to our future, I don’t believe there’s such a thing as “too fast.” I’m more of an “it’s about time” kind of man.

  Autumn: Shut up.

  Autumn: And I love you.

  Me: Insanely.

  Autumn: Stupidly.

  Me: Always.

  * * *

  “Sebastian.” Mrs. Norris’s eyes are as wide as saucers as she hesitates for a split second, then widens the door. “W-what a surprise. Please, come in.”

  I can’t describe it. It’s a mixture of a dozen different things, but the Norris’s house smells exactly the same as it did when I was a teenager. One breath in triggers a flood of memories —all the good ones.

  Wrestling Brady on the living room carpet while Autumn refereed.

  Holding Autumn’s hand under the table at Sunday lunch.

  Stealing cookies with Brady while Mrs. Norris’s back was turned.

  Stealing more than cookies with Autumn when her parents weren’t looking.

  “Can I get you some coffee? Tea maybe?”

  She gestures to the kitchen, and I see the faint tremble in her hand. When I shake my head, she leads me into the living room and sits on the edge of the couch, wringing her hands. She’s hesitant, but also eager in some way. She’s like a sneeze on the verge, but unsure whether to let it loose or stifle the urge.

  “I’m sorry to show up unannounced this way, but under the circumstances, I thought it would be best.”

  She nods her head and presses her lips together. She smooths the skirt of her sundress then tucks her hair behind her ear. It’s still the same golden blonde that Autumn’s used to be. Her eyes skirt over my face, then she laughs nervously. “You’ll have to forgive me for staring. You’ve grown into such a handsome man. I knew you would be, but to see you sitting here…” She blows out a breath and fans her watery eyes. “You’ll have to excuse me. I’m an emotional old woman these days.”

  “I don’t mean to upset you, but there are a few things I need to say. I would appreciate it if you’d hear me out.” Her lips tip into a watery smile, and she nods. “And then I’ll leave.”

  My last words bring back the pressed lips and wringing hands. The slightest touch of a feather could push her over the edge, and I don’t understand her reaction. I expected terse nods and cold shoulders. Where is the blatant dismissal I was prepared for?

  “I didn’t come here to rehash the past, I really didn’t. We both know what happened. The accident … me leaving town … the pregnancy. I can’t change any of it. None of us can change it, but we can forgive. And that’s what we’ve done. We’re moving forward, Mrs. Norris, and leaving the past in the past, where it belongs.”

  “So, you and Autumn,” she interrupts. “You’re together now?”

  “We are.”

  She chokes out a sob and covers her mouth with both hands.

  “I love her.”

  “Of course, you do,” she whispers, crying and laughing at the same time. “You always have.”

  Complete and utter confusion. What the hell is going on here?

  “And my sweet grandbaby? Aria?” She gives me an open-ended look. “Has she stolen your heart yet?”

  “Completely,” I whisper.

  She grabs a tissue from the side table and blots her eyes, drawing in slow breaths as she tries to calm herself.

  “I miss her so much. I miss both of them.”

  I feel as if I’ve entered an alternate universe, where black is white and up is down. One thing is for sure, I’m missing something here.

  “Then why did you turn your back on them? Autumn told me you haven’t spoken to her since she moved to Haven. Like her even renting an apartment from me was more than you’ll tolerate. If you miss them so much, then what the hell are you doing?”

  The horrified look on Mrs. Norris’s face tells me all I need to know. I went too far. But honestly, I don’t care. It needed to be said. If it shakes some sense into her, makes her see all she’s giving up, then it’s worth it.

  Tears track her cheeks as she shakes her head and grabs my hand out of my lap. It’s still trembling, and she squeezes tight as another sob breaks free.

  “Oh Sebastian, no. You’ve got this all wrong.”

  Chapter 39

  Present Day

  Sebastian

  Haven, LA

  Autumn’s car is already in the driveway when Aria and I pull up, and she takes off like a shot the second I unbuckle her car seat, shopping bag waving wildly in her clenched fist.

  I gather the rest of our purchases out of the trunk, with both hands because we bought that much shit, but I couldn’t pry that one bag out of Aria’s hand.

  I hit the front door just in time to hear her yell, “I got a new baving suit! A bikini!”

  Autumn and Isaac are sitting in the living room, one with a goofy smirk and the other with a scowl. I’ll let you guess who’s scowling.

  Footsteps clomp down the hallway as Aria calls out, “I’m going try it on.”

  I drop my bags by the front door, the crinkling of plastic the only sound once the bathroom door slams shut.

  “A bikini,” Autumn whispers, looking incredulous. “She’s only five years old.”

  “Calm down,” I say, before thinking better of it, then cringing at the glare those words earn me.

  “I’m just gonna—” Isaac mutters, pointing to the back and slinking away.

  Lucky shit.

  “Okay, I did not mean to say, ‘calm down.’ I’m smarter than that,” I say, doing my best to back pedal.

  “I don’t like this, Seb.” She shakes her head. Stands. Rubs her hands on her jeans while watching the bathroom door. “I figured she’d be about—oh, I don’t know—thirty before I let her wear a bikini.”

  “I think that’s supposed to be my line,” I chuckle.

  She raises her
arms in question. “I thought so, too.”

  Before I can respond, Aria races into the living room, arms wide and grinning.

  “Isn’t it pretty?” She spins in a circle and runs a reverent hand over her bathing suit. “Pink is my favorite color.”

  She’s so fucking adorable. Heart-stoppingly so. She flicks the tulle ruffles on her butt, and then shakes it like a little wet duck. She stands up tall and sucks in an excited breath, the halter top showing about an inch of her rounded belly.

  “It’s the best swimsuit I’ve ever seen, poppet,” Autumn whispers. “You look like a pool party princess.”

  “I am.” She giggles, before racing back down the hall. “I wanna show Isaac.”

  Autumn’s shoulders slump as she watches me through lowered lashes. I sit down next to her on the couch and draw her legs over my lap. She drops her head to my shoulder and sighs.

  “I overreacted,” she whispers.

  “Yes,” I say, unable to hide the laughter in my tone.

  “I’m sorry.”

  “I know.”

  “I’m a jackass.”

  She looks up at me with puppy dog eyes and an apologetic smile. I can’t resist. I press my lips to hers.

  “But you’re the cutest jackass I know,” I say before deepening the kiss, letting her tongue brush against mine.

  It’ll never get old. It’ll never be enough. If we live to be a hundred, I’ll still love her like the starstruck teenagers we once were. Because just like them, I still believe anything is possible, as long as we’re together.

  “Do you trust me?”

  “Yes.” No hesitation.

  “Do you love me?”

  “You know I do.”

  “Then you know I want what’s best for Aria. We won’t always agree when it comes to her, but I’ll talk to you. I’ll see your side.” I brush my thumb across her cheek and settle my hand at the base of her neck. “And you’ll have to see my side. You’re not alone anymore. I’m with you all the way. But it also means you have to take me into account. We’re a team.”