Noah

by Justine Elvira

  Waving hello to him I ask, "You took your last final, huh? My finals aren't for another two weeks. Where do you go to school?"

  "I'm a senior at Columbia University but when I graduate I've got Columbia's Law School to look forward to."

  Damn. That's a lot of school. I'm surprised Noah and him hit it off so well. Noah hates the idea that school is the only way to get an education. He only supports me because he knows I've wanted to be a nurse since I was six when my mother bought me a nurse Barbie for Christmas.

  "What type of law do you plan on studying?"

  "Business or Criminal."

  Okay, now it makes a little more sense. The fact that Caleb is considering Criminal law has probably given Noah a soft spot towards him.

  "Sorry to spring a guest on you, shorty, but I figured you wouldn't mind since I plan on getting a hotel room anyway."

  "You're not planning on staying with me here?" I'm disappointed at his change of plans. I was looking forward to sharing a bed with him for the next two nights. He always snuggles with me and keeps me warm during the night.

  Noah sits down on my small twin and bounces up and down on the mattress, making the springs squeak in protest. "As comfortable as this bed looks, I don't think all three of us will fit. You can stay with us at the hotel if you want."

  I won't turn down his offer. "Yeah, okay...but we're still going to the frat party tonight, right? I promised my roommate I'd be out tonight so she could have a few hours alone with her boyfriend."

  "I'd never miss the opportunity to hang with a bunch of drunk college girls. You want to go, Caleb?"

  Caleb looks at me thoughtfully as he answers Noah. "Sure. It could be fun."

  ***

  Everything I'd hoped this weekend would be with Noah, every plan I made in my head, has officially gone down the shitter. I just want him to leave campus, leave town, and I'll see him again in a few weeks back home. First, he ruined my intimate weekend alone with him by bringing a third wheel on the trip. Don’t get me wrong, Caleb seems like a really nice guy, but I was looking forward to some one-on-one time with Noah. I was maybe even going to tell him how I feel about him. He would have rejected me, I know he would, but at least my feelings would have been out in the open.

  Now there is no way I'll ever share with him how I feel because I'm staring at the second reason he ruined my week. Noah is standing over in the corner of the room with some sorority chick. She's in nothing but a tiny, hot pink bikini and she's wet, covered in Jell-O from the Jell-O fight she just won against another, equally undressed sorority girl.

  I have no idea what they're talking about but she is hanging all over him. She even brushes her Jell-O covered breasts against his arm a few times, causing me to throw up a little in my throat.

  I don’t know why I expected anything different this weekend. This is the Noah I know and remember. He can't be tied down and doesn't want to be. He enjoys playing the field. He's not the commitment type and he’ll never commit to me–I'm just the best friend he keeps around for when he's bored.

  For all I know he's aware of the way I feel about him and just doesn't give a shit. He probably gets sick pleasure knowing I pine after him. Maybe he likes stringing me along, or parading endless amounts of women in front of me.

  Okay, I should stop drinking. That's definitely the alcohol talking because even though I know he gets around a lot, this is the first time I've ever had to openly see him flirt with a girl. I didn't think it would hurt this much.

  I feel like I’m being gutted from the inside. His hand comes out to brush against her cheek, and then his lips come down to meet hers and they're making out in the corner of the fraternity's living room for anyone to see.

  I can't watch anymore. I need to leave.

  Turning around to bolt out the front door I run into a pair of crisp jeans and a teal polo shirt. The man inside them holds me steady and I look up into bright blue eyes and the familiar grin I met before.

  "Hey, where are you going?" Caleb asks me as he lets go of my arms.

  Not wanting him to see how upset I am, I mask my pain and put on my game face. "This party's lame. I was going to head out and find something more exciting to do," I reply nonchalantly, looking around the room as if I'm bored of this scene.

  "Yeah, I know what you mean. It's the same at every party at every university. I feel like I'm back at Columbia right now."

  "Really?" I ask genuinely curious. "I guess I haven’t been to enough of these parties to notice."

  He inches in closer so I can hear him over the music and whispers in my ear, "You're not missing much. At each party there will be more drinking, more dancing, more girls taking their clothes off just for the fun of it. Tonight will end with tons of hook-ups, a few people throwing up, and most people going to bed with a fat chance of them remembering what they did tonight when they wake up with colossal hangovers. And yet somehow they want to repeat it all again the next night."

  I burst out laughing at his rundown of the evening, because he nailed it. Why do people think frat parties are so fun? I rather spend the evening with one or two people I consider friends, instead of a hundred strangers.

  Caleb whispers something else in my ear but I miss it as my eyes meet Noah's from across the room. The endless smile he was sporting earlier is gone and in its place is a scowl as he watches me with Caleb. He looks pissed off, but I don't have time to figure out why he's mad because his make-out partner is kissing and licking down his neck, practically begging him to take her somewhere private and fuck her.

  Bringing my focus back on Caleb I ask, "Want to get out of here?"

  "Where did you have in mind?"

  "We can go back to the hotel. Rent a bunch of overly priced movies on the TV and piss Noah off when he sees the bill."

  Caleb laughs, grabs my hand and clasps it in his. His forwardness startles me and I want to pull my hand away, but I don't. I'm reading too much into things tonight and him holding my hand is probably just a friendly gesture. I could use a friend tonight since my best friend is a disappointment.

  "I'm pretty sure Noah might be bringing a girl back to the hotel room shortly." We both look back over to the corner of the room and Noah's hands are sliding up and down the sorority girl’s slick body as they start kissing again and her hand moves to the front of his jeans. "I don’t want to witness that," Caleb adds.

  "Ughh..." I groan and then pull on his hand as I walk towards the front door to leave the party. "Noah can hook up with her at her place, or one of the empty bedrooms in this frat house. He's not bringing her back to the hotel and if he does we just won’t let him in the room because it's inconsiderate."

  We make it out onto the front steps of the frat house and out here I instantly feel better. Being out of that environment, and the music inside only a muzzled thumping sound, makes it a lot easier to think straight.

  "You're a little feisty. I like it." Caleb must be talking about my feelings toward Noah and his hook-up inside the party. Well, at least I sound feisty instead of jealous.

  When we arrive at the hotel and walk into the room, we order a shit load of room service and Caleb orders a movie on the TV. We stay up and talk for hours, while eating entirely too much food for two people. When the movie ends we order another one and it serves as background noise while we talk and get to know each other.

  Caleb is a really fascinating guy. He has goals and dreams, and wants to be settled down with kids before he's thirty. He's thoughtful and listens intently when I speak. He's the type of guy I always envisioned myself with before I fell in love with Noah. I should want a guy like him again. I'm an adult now and Noah is never going to happen. A guy like Caleb is exactly what I need to live the most fulfilling life and meet all my childhood expectations. Somewhere I lost sight of my future, probably when I was getting lost in Noah's eyes, or schoolboy grin.

  As the sun begins to rise in the early morning hours, Noah still isn't back from the party, solidifying the feeling in my gut that No
ah and I aren't meant to be. He came here this weekend to be with me, and instead hooked up with a random girl after only being here for a few hours. I'll forever be the girl he looks at as only a best friend and not a lover.

  Maybe it's because this fact has finally sunk in, or the lack of sleep from being up all night, but I do something I'll probably end up regretting. I lean in and surprise Caleb with a kiss. His lips move against mine in a soft, tender kiss, and his mouth feels good tangled with mine...it feels really good.

  Sparks ignite throughout my body and I feel a fire start to burn in my southern region.

  Caleb's a complete gentleman and the kiss doesn't last long. We go to sleep afterward, but in those brief seconds my life went back on course, and what I thought I wanted with Noah was no longer on the path in front of me. A new course was forming, a course I wanted when I was younger but detoured off the last four years.

  I knew that one kiss with Caleb would change things forever and I was right. When the weekend ended there seemed to be a wedge between Noah and I. Gone was the comfort and ease I felt when I first saw him on Friday. It was replaced with an uncomfortable feeling in the pit of my stomach and an awkward rest of the weekend. That night shifted things, and if I needed any more evidence I just had to look at the man I was kissing goodbye and promising to come visit in New York in a few weeks.

  Caleb's lips left mine and then they were both gone and I was left to finish my last few weeks of my freshman year.

  Chapter Six

  The weeks following my attack outside the Forbidden Desires' office are long and lonely. Caleb seems to be working longer hours than ever, and I'm avoiding Noah at any cost. We never got around to discussing why I was working in his office that night and I'm not ready to tell him why, or that I've been working as a phone sex operator for his company for months.

  A lot happened that first morning after the attack. I realized I was being stupid and overreacting about Caleb leaving. I had a missed call and a few texts from him on my phone when I woke up telling me he loved me and that he was so sorry he had to leave while we were fighting like that. I texted him back, apologizing for overreacting. Kendall called me after I texted Caleb, worried about me. Noah had woken her up, reaming her out for being irresponsible and letting someone who didn't know the routine cover her shift just so she could get laid. He almost fired her, but when he heard the sincerity in Kendall's voice as she was crying and asking if I was okay, he calmed down and let her know her job was secure.

  Kendall kept my secret, never letting Noah in on the fact that I've worked for him for a while now.

  Avoiding Noah has been exhausting as I'm continually trying to find things to do so I'm not sitting at home when he stops by. Between him and working my two legitimate jobs, I'm exhausted at the end of the night. It's left me no time to take phone sex calls so I took a break.

  Tonight is my first night back since the attack. My emotions are everywhere and the past few weeks have fucked me up. I needed the distance from Noah's establishment and the connection to my attack, and it's been nice not having to fake pleasure while a man on the other end of the line jacks off. Now that I've had my time to come to terms with everything, there's a list of men waiting to talk with Nora, the name I use on the phone.

  The distraction is nice for a change because things aren't going so great at home.

  After my almost kiss with Noah I've felt incredibly guilty. I never want to be the kind of woman who could cheat on her boyfriend, so I've attempted to step things up in the seduction and appreciation departments at home. I'm being more attentive to Caleb, and trying to find little ways to show him I care. Tonight I made his favorite meal and lit the apartment in candle light while wearing next to nothing as I waited for him to come home.

  I was so excited to have this night with him, but Caleb came home late again tonight, ruining dinner and my sexual appetite. He apologized and went straight to bed, but I can't help the hurt I feel at another missed night with him as he brushes off my advances.

  I'm so desperate I've even thought about telling him about the attack a few weeks ago. He never asked me about the attack, because he never found out about it. My name was left out of the paper the next morning and he's been so busy at work he must not have had time to talk with Noah. I don't think Noah will keep this from him so I know he'll eventually find out, and if I told him, maybe he'd lavish some attention on me. I guess I'm just trying to hold our relationship together before all the cards in our weak house come tumbling down.

  I'm sitting on the couch waiting for my last call of the night to finish so I can join Caleb in bed, but this guy is taking forever to finish. "What are you wearing?" he asks me, his voice coming out frustrated.

  "I told you, I'm wearing nothing...and horny for your cum." I'm actually in a full set of flannel pajamas but he wants the illusion of a woman naked and waiting for him, not the real thing. Normally, I'd be a little more detailed and seductive but he's my last call and I'm tired.

  "Call me Big Daddy," he groans into the phone and I can hear the slapping wet friction sounds of him stroking himself off.

  "Okay...Big Daddy. Are you close? Are you going to come all over my tits?"

  He groans into the receiver as I continue talking in a low, husky voice. "You like that, Big Daddy? Give me your cum. I want it now."

  He cusses into the phone and it's followed by a long, drawn-out groan.

  Finally. I was beginning to think he was never going to finish.

  "Can I call you again?" he pants desperately.

  "You can always call, Big Daddy. Forbidden Desires, Inc. knows my schedule so they'll be able to fit you in." I hang up, never saying goodbye. It's rule number one in this business. You don't want the person on the other line to get attached and start looking at these conversations as more than they are.

  I send Kendall a text and let her know I’m finished with my last call and then clean up the living room, putting the remote by the TV and bringing my dish from dinner over to the kitchen sink. I'll wash it tomorrow.

  I begin to shut off the lights so I can join Caleb in bed when I notice his suit jacket resting on the back of a chair that goes with the kitchen table. I grab it and prepare to put it with his other dirty suits that I plan on dropping off at the dry cleaner. The jacket feels heavier and then a pocket begins to buzz.

  Poor guy. He always sleeps with his phone on the nightstand next to our bed. He must have been so exhausted he forgot about it. I feel a little guilty for being so hard on him tonight. I grab the phone out of his pocket so I can put it on the nightstand for him when the phone lights up with another text.

  Paula: Miss you

  Huh… Who's Paula?

  I can't recall any of his friends or family members by that name. The text is innocent enough. There are a lot of reasons to miss someone.

  Curiosity gets the best of me and I enter in his passcode to unlock his phone. I look down the hallway to make sure Caleb's still in our room and then I tap on the message app and hit Paula's name. My eyes are immediately confronted with text after text between the two of them. It's hard to decipher the texts when reading them backwards, starting with the most recent, so I scroll up through hundreds of texts so I can read some of these in order.

  Paula: What time do you check in?

  Caleb: Flight lands at three. I should be at the hotel by four.

  Paula: I'll be waiting ;)

  Okay, these aren't so bad. She could be a business associate or another lawyer at the firm.

  Caleb: I'm in my room.

  Paula: I'll come over.

  Caleb: You'll come...all over my face.

  Caleb: Then I'll come all over yours.

  Paula: Can't wait to taste you...

  Okay...not so innocent anymore. I scroll down through several texts and land on a different day. This was last Tuesday when he told me he had to work all night at the office preparing for a case that started the next morning. We got in a huge fight that night. I confronted h
im about never being home anymore and leaving me in the apartment by myself.

  I was so angry with him that night, but when he left after another one of our fights, I felt guilty about being so hard on him. He expressed to me over and over again how he didn't want to leave but he was the low man on the totem pole at work. If he didn't go into work he'd get fired. He explained how eventually he'll get the recognition he deserves and the new, younger associates will have to work these hours instead.

  He was right and a few minutes later I was calling him and apologizing for blowing up at him...again. That night I reasoned with myself that it wouldn't always be this way. To make up with him after our fight, I woke up early the next morning and waited for him by the front door. When he strolled in at five am I got on my knees and sucked him off.

  After reading these texts he didn't deserve my mouth, or my sympathy.

  Paula: Did you get away from her yet?

  Caleb: Already on my way.

  Paula: Was she mad?

  Caleb: She's always mad when I tell her I'm working late, but she'll get over it.

  Caleb: She believes whatever I say.

  Caleb: She's desperate for our relationship to work

  Paula: Good because I don't want to be the reason you break up.

  Paula: I'm interested in your cock and nothing else.

  Caleb: I guess that means my lips and tongue are worthless?