Almost Romance

by Kylie Gilmore

  “Why did you let me kiss you? I gave you fair warning.”

  She smashed her lips together. He knew she wouldn’t lie. She was a stickler for accuracy. “My libido trounced my brain. I blame your cologne for the short circuit.”

  He rubbed the back of his neck. “Is it serious with this guy?”

  She tilted her head. “I met Dr. Cooper two months ago at the emergency room. I burned my hand while trying to cook cherries jubilee. Don’t ask. Dr. Cooper, I mean Christopher, has crazy hours, so we’ve only managed to go on six dates.” She looked thoughtful. “There’s been no mention of the L word, so I’d have to say it’s a relationship with potential for serious if we spent more time together.”

  He got to the most important point. “Did you sleep with him?”

  “Yes.”

  That hit him where it counted. The honesty thing was a double-edged sword. He went to her desk and sat down, trying to decide what was the right thing to do here. They’d hooked up last May right after she graduated with her PhD. He’d thought the timing had finally been right. He’d gotten over his breakup with Morgan (after a three-year relationship); Kate was finally done with school. He knew that even though Kate saw grad school as her time to sow her wild oats, after her first semester she’d lost interest in men in favor of her studies. By then he was involved with Morgan. But he’d never forgotten Kate, how could he? They’d been thrown together over the years because of their married siblings. And if he was perfectly honest, although he’d loved Morgan and the sex had been good, the chemistry he had with Kate had never been topped. Hell, he’d wanted to be with her after their first hookup, but she’d been too young and not ready for more. Something he painfully came to accept because for the first time in his life he’d really wanted a relationship.

  Being with Kate changed him.

  He’d been a bit of a player back then, a love ’em and leave ’em kind of guy. He’d never spent time just talking, really getting to know a woman like he had the summer they’d first met. He’d been staying at his brother’s apartment while on break from grad school; she’d been staying with her sister across the hall, newly graduated from college. They talked about everything from mathematical discoveries relevant to computer science to why someone would scream during sex, which she postulated quite reasonably should only be a pleasurable thing. She had a sharp analytical mind with a unique perspective that made him always want to know what she was thinking. She was, in short, fascinating.

  And so determined to lose her virginity before starting grad school that fall. His brother had warned him not to touch Kate. Her sister had threatened to kick his ass if he touched. Hell, even Kate had first said she was saving herself for marriage, which he believed and respected. But then she shed her baggy T-shirts and frayed jeans in favor of skimpy tops and short skirts. She stopped wearing underwear and pranced around in practically see-through summer pajamas at night. And then she showed up one night in nothing but a robe, informed him she was no longer saving herself, and dropped the robe.

  A guy could only take so much.

  That night with Kate (and the next morning) had made something abundantly clear to him—the sex was great because it was with someone he deeply cared about. He’d slept with a good number of women and nothing had ever come close.

  Sometimes he liked to think she’d been saving herself just for him.

  Kate had been about to start the same grad school that he went to, MIT, which had made him think they might continue what they’d started that summer. But the timing hadn’t been right. She wanted a chance to date other guys, having had no experience before him. He understood even though he’d hated the whole idea of her with other guys. After their recent graduation hookup last May, she’d informed him she didn’t want to do the long-distance thing, so he’d tried once again to move on.

  But he couldn’t stop thinking about her. He finally got some time off work and had flown out here to convince her to give the long-distance thing a chance. Her fellowship was for two years, only a year and a half left at this point, and then they could be together. She could look for work on the East Coast. There were plenty of universities there. He hadn’t counted on a boyfriend. Barry and Amber hadn’t mentioned one. How serious could it be if Kate hadn’t told her sister? He knew Kate told Amber about everything important in her life.

  “Turn around so I can change,” Kate said.

  “I’ve already seen you naked,” he reminded her.

  “I don’t want to tempt you,” she said in her honest way.

  He heaved a sigh and turned to face the opposite wall. There were no windows in her small office, so it was pretty private. He heard a rustle and then a loud, “Aahh.” Which reminded him a little too much of the noises she made when they were naked. He quietly banged his head against the wall.

  “Ian! You’re going to lose brain cells that way. Knock it off!”

  He stopped and rested his forehead against the cool wall. He had exactly one week in Chicago. He was flying home Christmas Eve to spend Christmas with his family, something that was especially important to his mother since his father died five years ago. Plus it was his niece Violet’s second Christmas (Barry and Amber’s daughter). She’d understand more what was going on this year. It was time to lay his cards on the table. Carefully, so as not to scare Kate off. She was uncomfortable with emotions, no wonder, considering the way her parents were so formal and distant, but he felt, with some care, he could get through that defense.

  “I’m turning around,” he said.

  “Wait!”

  He waited.

  “Okay.”

  He turned and it took everything he had not to reach out and touch. Her hair had come out of its bun and cascaded over her shoulders in waves. She only looked like that in bed. She wore a baggy white sweater and faded jeans. She’d left her glasses on the desk, and he had a clear view of bright blue eyes no longer obscured by the huge lenses. Her skin was smooth and perfect, a cute upturned nose, high cheekbones, a full bottom lip. “Kate,” he managed.

  She blinked a few times, seemed to remember her glasses, and snagged them, sliding them back in place. Then she started shaking out her sweater and looking all over the floor. “I seem to have lost my hair band.”

  “Don’t worry about it.”

  She kept looking. “My hair gets in the way when I’m working.”

  “Can you listen for a minute?”

  She stilled. “What?”

  “I don’t have a consulting job in Chicago. I came here to see you.”

  Her mouth formed a perfect O of surprise.

  “I wanted to ask you to give the long-distance thing a chance. I really like you.” The head-over-ass in love with you kind of like.

  She rubbed her forehead and finally said, “But…I’m dating Christopher now.” She stood there for a moment, brow furrowed, deep in thought. “When do you leave?”

  He winced. “Can’t wait to get rid of me?”

  “No! I’m sorry.” She frowned. “That came out wrong. I just wanted to know how much time we have to hang out as friends.”

  “I have a week. I’m flying home Christmas Eve.”

  “I’m also flying home Christmas Eve. Are you going to Barry and Amber’s?”

  “Wouldn’t miss Violet’s second Christmas.”

  “Then I guess I’ll see you there too. I fly back the day after Christmas.”

  He’d known she wouldn’t stay back home long. She found it difficult to leave her work, and he understood that single-minded focus and immersion in equations, he was the same way when deep in a computing project. Which was why he was here, hoping to catch the brief window of time when things slowed down before Christmas to convince her there was something between them worth pursuing. He’d seen her last Christmas too for Violet’s first Christmas, but he’d brought a new girlfriend. Total rebound situation only three weeks after his breakup with Morgan. He’d picked Olivia up at Build-a-Bear after she helped him choose Violet’s f
irst teddy bear. He ended things with her the day after Christmas because one look at Kate enthusiastically explaining to their eight-month-old niece why the color violet always appeared at the bottom of the rainbow due to its shorter wavelength and greater refraction of light made him realize it was pointless. He would never want anyone the way he wanted Kate. An uncomfortable fact that had pricked his conscience whenever he’d seen Kate during the Morgan years. Dumping his rebound girlfriend made no difference in the Kate situation. She’d already headed back to work the day after Christmas, deep in postdoc applications.

  “We could share a cab ride to the airport,” she said. “My flight’s nine a.m. into La Guardia. Same flight?”

  “No, I’m seven thirty into JFK.”

  “We could still share a cab.”

  He crossed to her and caught her citrusy grapefruit scent, which he knew was from her shampoo because she’d asked him to sniff her hair and give his opinion when she’d first bought that kind four years ago. He didn’t dare linger to breathe her in. That path only led to wanting to strip her down and taste her everywhere. “Maybe I should let you get back to work. Text me if you want to get together.”

  She brightened. “I will. I’m seeing Christopher tonight to exchange gifts, but I’m free tomorrow. How about dinner? As friends, I mean.”

  “Great,” he muttered, brushing by her.

  She put a gentle hand on his arm. “Ian, don’t be mad. I didn’t know you were coming here. I thought we were free to date other people.” She looked down. “I’m not trying to hurt you. Please let’s still be friends.”

  He had to force the words out. “We’re friends. We’ll hang out. I’m stuck here for the week anyway.”

  She dropped her hand and a pang of guilt made him try to smooth things over. It wasn’t her fault he’d surprised her like this. Of the two of them, he’d had a girlfriend much more of the time than she’d had a boyfriend. “Have you seen Violet lately? She’s getting so big.” Violet was nearly two and so cute. Blond hair like her mom, brown eyes like her dad. Her hair would likely darken. He and his older brothers, Barry and Daniel, had all been blond when they were little.

  She beamed, and his heart kicked up. Kate rarely smiled, too serious most of the time, but when she did, it was spectacular. “I Skype with her every Sunday. She’s brilliant! You noticed it too, right?”

  He found himself smiling. “How could I miss it?”

  “She’s only twenty-one months, but she already knows all her colors, especially violet. She can count to twelve, and knows half her ABCs. Up to N. I’m working on getting her to P. She can also moo and do silly dances, thanks to Barry. Have you seen her cow bib and hat?”

  Barry owned a fro-yo shop, The Dancing Cow, and loved to dress up like a cow to entertain the kids. Naturally, he dressed his daughter like a cow to join him.

  He grinned. “I did.”

  Her blue eyes lit up behind her glasses. “I’ve been trying to think of the perfect Christmas gift for her for weeks. She’s a little young for a tea set and not quite ready for an Emma doll. That’s the kind that can really drink a bottle and get diaper changes. Like a real baby.” She shook her head, murmuring, “I’ll think of something.”

  He was surprised by Kate’s girly gift ideas. He’d thought she’d get Violet a telescope or a model of the solar system. Though she had gotten Violet a cute plush mermaid rattle last Christmas now that he thought about it. He spied her hair band on the floor and handed it to her.

  “Thanks.” She put her hair back up in its usual messy bun and returned to her desk. “I’ll text you tomorrow, okay?”

  He wanted to say don’t sleep with Christopher tonight, but he had no right. “Yup.” He stopped in the doorway and watched her expression when he added, “Have a good time tonight.”

  She was already deep into whatever work she’d pulled up on her computer. He quietly shut the door behind him.

  ~ ~ ~

  Kate carefully wrapped the large painting that was her gift for Christopher, stuck it in the roomy trunk of her blue Subaru station wagon, chosen for its tremendous safety record, and drove over to his apartment building near the hospital where he worked. They’d be exchanging gifts tonight because he had to work the weekend shift at the hospital in order to get off for Christmas the following weekend. She loved this painting and almost kept it for herself, but she felt it important to give a thoughtful gift to your boyfriend with potential for more. Christopher was handsome, smart, successful, with a wonderful history of longevity in his family. He was, by any estimation, ideal husband material. He was a good kisser too. A seven in the bedroom, but that wasn’t horrible. They’d slept together twice. The best thing was she never lost focus with him due to her libido, so she felt confident her work would always have priority in her brain-space.

  She parked in the underground parking garage of his building and rode the elevator up to the lobby, where Christopher buzzed her in.

  He answered the door with a big smile, which she returned with a small smile of her own for the sake of politeness. She wasn’t in the habit of big smiles for no good reason. It reminded her of a chimpanzee baring its teeth, which was never a friendly sign. Christopher was nicely average—average height (five ten), average weight, and build. Short, dark brown hair, brown eyes, clean-shaven, typically. He smiled a lot like he found something funny, though she was often confused as to what exactly that was. “Merry Christmas, Kate.”

  “Merry Christmas,” she said, though she couldn’t help but think it wasn’t yet Christmas so they should hold off on that greeting.

  He inclined his head. “That’s a huge present you’ve got there.”

  “Here.” She shoved the large painting in his hands. She dropped her purse and took off her wool coat, watching with increasing irritation as he carefully and slowly took off the paper. Everyone knew you were supposed to tear off the paper as quickly as possible. She used the minimal amount of tape so he could do exactly that.

  Finally, the painting was revealed. An Amber Lewis-Furnukle original. It was a cow in a field of grass. One of Amber’s rare figurative watercolors. Her sister was a very talented artist who’d sold paintings to galleries. Most of the paintings were abstracts. This painting was bound to be collectible due to its rarity.

  Christopher laughed. “A cow? Wow.” He shook his head. “That’s nice. Thank you.”

  “It’s not nice,” she huffed. “It’s a rare, original watercolor by my sister, an up-and-coming artist. I’m sure it’ll only increase in value due to its rarity. I thought you appreciated art.” She gestured to the geometric paintings that hung on the walls of his living room.

  He kissed her cheek. “I do. Thank you. I really like it. And I’m not surprised your sister’s an artist. You always have a Bohemian look going on.”

  “I do?”

  “Yeah, the rumpled hair, the long sweaters, the frayed jeans. It’s cute.”

  “My hair’s not rumpled. It’s in a bun.”

  He touched her bun. “Kind of half in, half out. Bohemian.”

  She stiffened, slightly alarmed at how little he seemed to know her after six dates and two nights of okay sex. “I’m not Bohemian at all. I’ve been wearing the same clothes for the last seven years because they fit and they’re comfortable. My hair’s in a loose bun because I need it out of the way, but I don’t want it distracting me with a tight pull away from my face.”

  “Okay, okay, you’re not Bohemian. Here, let me get your gift.” He crossed to the end table and picked up a small black velvet box. Her heart pounded like crazy. Was he going to propose? She should say no, right? She should say they needed more time to get to know each other. One of them needed to say the L word. Though she, personally, had never said it to anyone ever. Not even her family. Her family wasn’t very expressive. Her parents were physicists, like her, and spent most of their time figuring out the wonders of the universe, not coddling their daughter, who happened to grow up in their universe. Her sister, Amber, was
much more expressive. She had a different mother than Kate, though both of their mothers were blond and petite (her father had a type, apparently), which explained why they resembled each other a bit in looks, but not at all in personality traits.

  He pressed the box into her hand and grinned. “Open it.”

  She girded her loins. Then she quickly opened it and stared at a gold charm bracelet with a bunch of beads and shiny doodads and in the center a miniature Christmas wreath studded with tiny diamonds. It was the same bracelet she’d seen advertised all over the city—on billboards, on bus stops, on the el. This was the bracelet thousands of women were wearing this Christmas. A gift that required no thought behind it whatsoever. Besides that, she didn’t even wear jewelry. She didn’t like anything on her body to distract her from the single-minded focus needed for work. This would ride up and down her arm all day long, irritating her, and she couldn’t wear it in the lab at all.

  She shut the lid with a snap. “Thank you for the gift.”

  “Put it on,” he said, opening the lid again. He took it out and put it on her. “Beautiful.”

  She was about to undo the clasp when he tilted her face up and kissed her. A small tingle went through her. She kissed him back, hoping to lose the memory of Ian’s kiss earlier, which she should probably tell Christopher about, considering honesty was very important in relationships. Were they in a relationship? She wasn’t sure. They hadn’t talked about it, actually, maybe they should—

  He stopped kissing her.

  “You okay?” he asked. “It feels like you’re a million miles away.”

  Ridiculous. She was standing right in front of him. She got to the point. “A friend is in town. His name is Ian, and I’ll be going to dinner with him tomorrow night. As friends.” She nodded once. “I thought you should know.”

  He raised a brow. “Ex-boyfriend?”

  “No, he was never my boyfriend. It was a purely physical relationship.”