Love after Marriage

by Chandra, Bhagya

  Roshni looked into his eyes. She tried to pull her hand away from him, but his grip was too strong.

  “Roshni, sometimes I just lose control and say things. I was concerned for you. I was very worried because you did not pick up the phone. I should have known better than to disturb you, especially since you were busy completing the testing. My apologies!”

  Roshni felt uncomfortable. She pulled her hand from his grip and stood up. Deepak expected her to respond to his apology, but instead she looked at him and asked, “Did you have dinner?”

  “No, and I am hungry. Kusum bhabhi is warming up the food.”

  “Oh, okay, let me go and help her.”

  As she began to leave, Deepak took hold of her hand and pulled her towards him. Holding her around the waist, he stared into her eyes. “Did you eat?” he asked very lovingly.

  Roshni was nervous. Unable to respond to this gesture, she simply replied, “Yes, we never expected you today; otherwise we would have waited.”

  She pulled herself away from him. They heard Kusum call Deepak for dinner; the food was warm and ready. Roshni asked if Deepak wanted to freshen up and change. He nodded and agreed to meet her in the dining area.

  Chapter 17

  Deepak in Mumbai after the Conference

  Roshni was downstairs near the dining table, waiting for Deepak. She told Kusum bhabhi to rest and she would serve Deepak and clean up the table. Deepak arrived all changed and fresh. He pulled a chair next to Roshni and sat. Kusum joined Sashank and Akash in the family room to watch TV.

  Roshni began to serve Deepak and slowly she tried to move away from him, but his response was quicker. He grabbed her hand and asked her to sit next to him. She was uncomfortable, but she sat next to him and served him food. Deepak enjoyed the food, and a couple of times he tried to feed her, but Roshni was definitely not in a mood to entertain this behavior of his.

  After his dinner, Roshni cleaned the table, and Deepak helped her. She resisted initially, but then gave in. She could not stop admiring his willingness to help her.

  Her thoughts went back to the comment he’d made a few minutes ago: “You are here working alone. How can I relax outside with them? I don’t like it. I will be here to keep you company.” She smiled to herself. She liked this gesture!

  Everybody retired to their rooms, and so did Roshni and Deepak. Roshni asked Deepak to sleep on the bed while she slept on the sofa. Roshni was mentally exhausted and went to sleep as soon as her head hit the pillow.

  Deepak relaxed on the bed but couldn’t sleep. He pulled his pillow up to support him as he leaned back on the headboard. He quietly watched Roshni: her beautiful dark and long hair, silky white skin and her features. She was physically very beautiful, but her personality – her composure and maturity, honesty and openness, her being very loving and caring – all these qualities made her really beautiful. She was financially independent. If needed, she could live a very lavish, modern life, but she chose to be a simple Indian girl brimming with Indian values. She had everything a man could wish for in his life partner!

  As these thoughts captured his mind, unawares he slowly moved towards her. He came to the sofa and knelt in front of her. He raised his hand and gently stroked her hair without disturbing her.

  He watched her closely and whispered, “Why do you have to pay for what I did? You had no clue of my expectations of a girl or my ideas regarding a marriage. You are so innocent and are paying for this stupid, immature mistake of mine. Why?” He looked at her. “There was no need for you to sleep here on this sofa so uncomfortable. Why are you going through all this for this family? I yelled at you, and you listened to me quietly. Oh, Roshni…why are you doing this? You have so much patience!”

  He had a tear in his eye. Wiping his tear, he bent down closer to her. “Roshni, I am so sorry!”

  He continued looking at her. “Roshni, I always respected you, but now…I enjoy talking to you, I feel like spending time with you…and…and I want to spend every moment of my life with you. Please give me an opportunity to eliminate the doubt and mistrust you have in me.”

  With a sense of guilt, combined with appreciation and gratitude for what she did, he wiped his tears and moved away from her and walked back to the bed. With good thoughts of the experiences during this trip, he went to sleep.

  ~ ~ ~

  On Thursday morning, Roshni woke up early, feeling fresh and well rested. It was a bright morning with birds chirping, loud temple music, and the morning sun rays piercing through the window. Deepak was still asleep, so she quietly closed the windows so the bright light and the music did not bother him.

  She got ready and came to her babuji’s picture and asked for his blessings, as she was ready to release her design that day. Then she went to the pooja room, and as was her routine, she cleaned the room, lit the oil lamp and the incense, and prayed to Devi Maiya and Shirdi Baba for their blessings with the release of the design.

  Kaki had made chai the way she preferred – fresh ginger, cinnamon and cardamom. A fresh cup of chai in the morning was refreshing. Roshni was getting ready to leave when she heard Deepak come down. Roshni brought him chai, and as he enjoyed the chai, he asked Roshni if he could drop her at work. Roshni was hesitant and made some excuses, but to no avail, she had to give in.

  Roshni had brought her babuji’s car after his death to Sashank’s house. She asked Deepak to take that car since Sashank would need his vehicle. By this time he had become familiar with driving on Mumbai roads and also remembered the directions to Roshni’s office, so he did not need any help with navigation.

  As they drove, he asked, “Roshni, do you want to keep this car?”

  “Yes, I will need it in the future, and I would like to keep it…as a good memory of Babuji. In addition, it is good to have one extra car in the house.”

  Deepak nodded. “Makes sense.”

  They arrived at her workplace, and as she got out, he called, “Roshni.”

  She turned around, and with a smile Deepak said, “Good luck with your release today. Please convey my best wishes to your entire team!”

  Roshni smiled in acknowledgement. “Yes, I will. Thank you.”

  ~ ~ ~

  After returning home, Deepak had breakfast and went to the room to clean up and also gather his dirty laundry. Looking for shirts, he opened the closet and noticed his clothes on the top shelf where Roshni had left them, ironed and folded.

  He reached for them and accidentally knocked down a box. It was one of the jewelry sets he had given Roshni for her birthday. He remembered how beautiful she looked when she tried them on. He smiled involuntarily as he picked up the box, but when he tried to put it back, he felt some resistance. He brought a stool and was about to replace the box when his mouth dropped open in astonishment. Roshni had left the dresses and the jewelry sets he’d bought for her there.

  A few seconds later, his mouth went in a big O… “What!” He picked it up, and there it was…her passport with their marriage certificate in it.

  How can Roshni be so careless of these documents? Does she realize how important these are? he thought to himself.

  He’d speculated that soon after their marriage, she was in anguish and might have just thrown away her passport along with the marriage certificate. He was very happy to have found it because he had planned on asking her for a copy of her passport, but was in a dilemma to ask her because of her attitude towards this topic.

  Deepak planned on applying for her immigration soon after he went back to the US and needed this information along with the marriage certificate. He thanked God in his mind for helping him find these. He made photocopies of her passport and marriage certificate and replaced the originals in the closet where he’d found them.

  Now that he was on this task, he wanted a few photographs of their marriage as well, and he found the DVD on that shelf. He took the DVD and put it in his bag.

  One major mission accomplished! The next task for him was her signatures, and he had
to think how he could accomplish this. In an instant, he thought of the power of attorney, the papers he had taken with him soon after their wedding. Never mind, I don’t need her signatures. I have the authority to sign on her behalf. I will take care of it, he thought.

  The rest of the day passed with him resting and getting some packing done. Since he’d arrived in India, he had been busy, so he never had an opportunity to call Vivek’s parents. After lunch and while he waited for the clock to tick until 5 p.m., he called Vivek’s father to check on his health.

  Vivek’s father certainly improved, and they had a conversation for some time when Deepak asked if they wanted to send any parcels for Vivek and Vaishali. Vivek’s father indicated that he would discuss this with his wife and get back to him. They had a good conversation and hung up.

  Deepak became restless waiting. He passed the time by watching TV and checking his e-mail, and it was only 3 p.m. when he felt the urge for chai. As this thought crossed his mind, he heard the doorbell ring. He opened the door, and his mouth opened wide. Roshni was at the door and waited for him to move so she could get in.

  He could not believe his eyes, as he had planned to pick her up at 5 p.m. Roshni asked Kaki to make some chai for her and walked up the stairs to her room.

  Deepak followed her. “Roshni, why are you home early?”

  “Why? Are you not happy? I thought I could surprise you a little too!” She winked at him.

  Deepak liked this gesture of hers, and he smiled. He undoubtedly was very pleased to see her home early. Roshni left her handbag on the table and went to freshen up. She felt relieved after the last few hectic weeks at work. She splashed her face with cold water. Her thoughts went back to the day’s events – the meetings and the prototype design release – and she smiled, feeling very accomplished.

  She came out of the bathroom while Deepak waited patiently for her. She asked him if he’d had chai, and when he replied in the negative, both went downstairs.

  As they drank chai and relished it, Deepak asked, “So, Roshni, how was it?”

  “What?”

  “How did the release go? Was everybody happy with the design?”

  “Yes, no problems during the final testing. Everybody was very happy.”

  “Great, congratulations, good work!” He had done designing and release in the past and was aware of the stress.

  “Thank you!” she acknowledged.

  Both of them were quiet for a few minutes, neither saying anything. Finally, he said, “Roshni, can I ask you something?”

  “Yes, what is it?”

  “I want to take you out to dinner tonight; what do you say?”

  “Tonight?” She looked at him very curiously.

  Deepak nodded.

  Roshni looked at her watch; it was 4 p.m. She fasted on Thursdays every week. Usually, she went to the temple and then had dinner. She communicated the same to Deepak.

  This was news to Deepak. “Roshni, you haven’t eaten anything since this morning?”

  “Yes, today is Thursday, and I fast every Thursday.”

  After chai, they went to their room. Roshni hoped to relax and do nothing that evening. Dinner with Deepak – she struggled with the idea!

  She sat on the sofa with her legs folded up. Deepak sat next to her and said, “You could have eaten some fruits or even snacks. Already you have been tense and working hard because of this project, and if you don’t eat, you will be tired and weak. Why don’t you eat something?”

  Deepak was concerned for Roshni, and she could see it was a very genuine concern. “I have been fasting for a few years now and have gotten used to it. I was hoping to go to the temple soon so I could have an early dinner and rest, but…”

  “So what do you want to do now?”

  Roshni closed her eyes and tilted her head back against the sofa. Deepak knew she was tired, so he moved closer to her.

  Roshni immediately opened her eyes and moved a little distance from him. He tried to put his hand on her shoulder to talk to her, but she brushed off his hand. She still avoided physical proximity with Deepak, and this bothered him.

  In the last few days, all the attempts he’d made to be closer to her were exhibited in public. He wanted her to understand that he wanted to be part of her life, but she never gave him an opportunity. He was dejected.

  She got up from the sofa.

  “Roshni, where are you going?”

  “I will get ready and go to the temple.”

  “I will go with you,” Deepak said.

  “No, you don’t have to go with me.”

  Deepak was stubborn and spoke very assertively. “No, I am going with you to the temple, and that is final. Go ahead and get ready, and I will get ready as well.”

  “Deepak, nobody is home yet. I will go to the temple while you wait here.”

  “Nothing doing. Kaki is here. If they don’t show up by the time we go, Kaki will inform them or I will call them later. No worries!” He very sternly added, “And from there we will go to dinner.”

  Roshni looked at him. “Do I have to put up with this all day tomorrow?”

  Deepak smiled at her frustration. “Yes, not only tomorrow but until I leave on Sunday.” He whispered, “All your life, my dear!”

  Roshni rolled her eyes. “Whatever.” She shook her head and entered the bathroom.

  Deepak smiled at her as she walked into the bathroom. Good, she finally gave up. I like it.

  Deepak changed into a dress shirt and pants while Roshni wore a simple blue and pink salwar kameez. Deepak recognized it as one of the dresses she’d purchased in Jammu. He liked it.

  “Roshni, that looks very nice on you. You bought it in Jammu, right?”

  Roshni agreed.

  “Roshni, why don’t you wear one of the dresses I gave you for your birthday?”

  Roshni just glanced at him and was disinterested. She did not want to start an argument with him regarding their marriage, so she kept quiet.

  Deepak continued, “Roshni, I asked you something.”

  “I heard.”

  “So…?”

  “Deepak, I don’t have any patience or strength now to get into an argument with you, so shall we just leave it there, please?” She was tired and pleaded with him.

  Deepak very lovingly came to her and put his hand around her waist, pulling her towards him. “Roshni, I know you’re tired and exhausted, especially with the fast that you kept all day, but I’m only asking you a simple question. It would make me happy if I could see you in one of those dresses.”

  Roshni attempted to free herself, and she was getting tired of him being so romantic on this trip. She ignored his question completely. “Deepak, I can understand you being romantic with me in public, but here – nobody is here. You don’t have to be romantic or pretend to be my husband. Please let me go.”

  Staring at her beautiful face, he pulled her closer to him. “Roshni, I don’t have to pretend anywhere, you know. You are my wife.”

  “Don’t you remember our agreement, or shall I remind you again?” she said.

  She struggled to get out of his arms, and Deepak was very cautious not to upset her anymore, so he let her go reluctantly.

  She moved away from him and turned around. “Shall we go?”

  “Yes,” he agreed and followed her down.

  They informed Kaki about their evening plans and left. They first went to the temple and took Shirdi Baba’s darshan. After darshan, they relaxed in the temple outside of the sanctorum and discussed their dinner plans.

  “So, Roshni, where do you want to go? I mean, which restaurant?”

  “Deepak, I prefer simple Indian food, either North Indian or South Indian. It doesn’t matter. But is that what you want to eat?”

  “I’m fine with either of them, Roshni. You pick.”

  Roshni was tired and hungry. She had no patience to go around looking for a restaurant.

  She was about to suggest a place when he said, “Roshni, what about a chat p
lace? Let’s eat something different, something chatpata, please.”

  Roshni looked at him, and he smiled. He was in the mood to eat something spicy, sweet-and-sour food. She was hungry, and the moment she heard ‘chat’ her mouth started watering too!

  “So, is there a chat place close by? What foods do you think they have?” asked Deepak.

  “Samosa and chole, vada pav, bhel puri, batata vada and a few more,” replied Roshni.

  “OOOH, my mouth is already watering. Roshni, is there a decent place close by? Let’s go!” Now that he heard Roshni mention a few items, he could not resist.

  Roshni visited a chat place routinely with friends, so she decided to take him there. On the way, they talked about the various foods at this place. The restaurant was very crowded, and Deepak was amazed at the young crowd. Roshni explained that chat places were very popular amongst college boys and girls, and were the usual hang-out places for the youth.

  Roshni and Deepak were seated at a corner table. Deepak viewed the menu, and every item he saw he could not stop his ‘ooohs’ and ‘aahs’. The aroma of frying onions, ginger, garlic and masalas wrapped tantalizingly around the restaurant. Deepak noticed that people around eating the spicy foods had watery noses, a thin film of sweat on their foreheads, and yet – they ate and enjoyed the spicy foods. Deepak looked around and chuckled – unbelievable!

  Roshni ordered poori chole while Deepak ordered samosa, vada pav and chat. As they waited for the food, they talked about very general topics. Roshni asked Deepak about the conference and training. Deepak gave Roshni the details, and he was careful not to raise any topic that would end in an argument.

  It had been a long time since Deepak had tasted such authentic chat foods, and he thoroughly enjoyed them. Roshni relished the spicy food after a day-long fast, but more importantly, she was astounded by Deepak – he was into it completely. He ordered mango lassi to accompany the spicy food while Roshni had chai.

  On the way back, Roshni was pretty quiet and had her eyes closed.