Love after Marriage

by Chandra, Bhagya

  “Roshni, are you sleeping?” Deepak asked.

  “No, just have my eyes closed. I am relaxing.”

  “How come you’re so quiet? Are you all right?”

  “Yes.”

  “So what’s the plan for tomorrow and Saturday? Where are you taking me?” he asked.

  At this statement, Roshni opened her eyes and glanced towards him. “I thought you wanted to spend time with me, take me somewhere. Why do you ask me?”

  “Yes, I want to spend time with you, talk to you, but you are more familiar with places around here. I am ready to go anywhere with you,” he said and smiled at her very lovingly. “I just want to spend time with you!”

  “I haven’t planned anything. Hmm, where do you want to go?” she asked again.

  “Like I mentioned, Roshni, it doesn’t matter where we go. I just want to spend some time with you.”

  “So is it okay if we just stay around here?”

  Roshni didn’t want to go away with him outside of Mumbai, and he sensed that from her conversation.

  “Roshni, why stay here? Let’s go. Even if it’s a long drive, I really want to talk to you about a few things in private.”

  “I can’t think of anything at this time. Maybe tomorrow when my brain is more active I may come up with some ideas.” She paused for a few seconds, “Why not ask Sashank bhaiya…after all, this was his idea,” she said sarcastically.

  Deepak sensed how uncomfortable she was. “Roshni, he was thinking of us. He felt we should spend time together.” He was equally persistent to take her out.

  “Yeah, he doesn’t know what kind of relationship we have,” she responded brusquely.

  Deepak noticed that she was a little agitated. She did not want him to go to the temple with her, and now…she did not want to go anywhere with him. “Roshni, let’s discuss this tomorrow. We don’t have to talk now,” he said to distract her.

  They arrived home and very quietly went to their room. Both were very tired. With minimum talk, they changed into their nightclothes and went to bed.

  ~ ~ ~

  Friday morning Deepak was up by 7:30 a.m. He noticed Roshni was asleep, so without disturbing her, he went downstairs to the dining area. Sashank, Akash and Kusum were having breakfast and getting ready to go to work.

  Deepak conversed with his family at the dining table, and since they had not seen Roshni, they enquired if she was okay. Deepak mentioned that she was tired and was resting.

  While this conversation was going on, Roshni came down for chai. She sat at the table, next to Kusum didi just opposite to Deepak. “Good morning, everybody.”

  Everybody acknowledged her.

  “Roshni bete, Deepak tells me you have not decided where you want to go. Do you have a place in mind?” asked Sashank.

  Deepak did not give Roshni an opportunity to speak. “Yes, bhaiya, we will come up with a plan.”

  All of them left for work, leaving Roshni and Deepak behind. They sat at the table and drank chai, and Roshni munched on some biscuits. She was relaxing and taking advantage of her vacation day.

  Roshni realized she was a little too rude to Deepak the previous night, so she apologized. Later, they talked about the food at the chat place, and how delicious all the items were. They relaxed at the table and talked about the previous evening, Vivek and Vaishali, and a few other topics.

  “Roshni, it’s already 11:30 a.m. Please tell me, what’s your plan?” Deepak asked.

  “Deepak, I have no plans.” She thought for a moment. “By the way, just a thought…have you been around Mumbai?”

  “It has been a while. Why? What do you have in mind?”

  “Why don’t we go out to lunch and then tour Mumbai, drive around the town. This will give us an opportunity to talk like you mentioned, and we can come back late in the evening after dinner.”

  “I like the idea of going out for dinner and lunch, but…why not go away for an overnight trip, please?” He literally pleaded with her now. Part of him felt he had to be persistent with Roshni or else she would not agree easily.

  “Where do you want to go? We only have a few options: Khandala, Lonawala or Pune, or maybe Shirdi. What do you say?”

  Deepak thought for some time. “I am not excited about Shirdi, but tell me more about the other three places.”

  Roshni gave him brief descriptions, and Deepak was on the computer, trying to find out more information, and finally they decided on Lonawala.

  Chapter 18

  Deepak and Roshni visit Lonawala

  Deepak and Roshni agreed to get ready and leave as soon as possible. It was already 1 p.m. by the time they were ready. They informed Kaki, and Roshni called Kusum didi to tell her of their plan, and they set out in Roshni’s babuji’s car. They decided to have lunch before they left.

  “Hmm, Roshni, you remember we went to the Indo-Chinese place the first time we met.”

  Roshni nodded.

  “Shall we go there? I liked their food,” he said.

  They agreed, and after she gave him directions, he said, “I had never tasted Indo-Chinese food before you introduced me to it. What a wonderful discovery. Mingling Chinese and Indian herbs and spices, it does enhance the taste, doesn’t it? Even the sweet-and-sour soup here tastes so different than in the US. I visit Chinese restaurants frequently, but nothing comes close in taste.”

  Deepak and Roshni arrived at the restaurant. It was Friday and lunchtime, and they had to wait for a few minutes before they were seated.

  Deepak asked Roshni to order since she was familiar with the dishes. While they waited for their food, both were quiet for a few minutes.

  Deepak initiated the conversation. “Roshni, thank you for everything.”

  “What for?”

  “You’ve done such a wonderful job with Sashank bhaiya and Akash bhaiya. It is unbelievable to see the changes in both of them; they are so cheerful.”

  “Actually, I did nothing. I just had to show them what was right, and they themselves were smart enough to figure it out.” She paused and then continued, “We, all of us, sometimes get hung up with certain perceptions and beliefs, and we do not want to look outside of that window. Only, if we were flexible, the other side is also very promising. That is what I did with both of them.”

  “Roshni, it is important that somebody is patient to show the other side as well, and you did a remarkable job, not only with them but with me too!”

  Roshni was taken aback and stared at him with a questioning expression. What did I do to change him?

  Deepak looked at her and held her hand and…

  Roshni pulled her hand away and tried to distract him. “Deepak, what do you think of Kusum bhabhi?”

  The food was served, and they began their lunch as the conversation continued.

  “I really like her. She is such a sweet person, very caring. She is definitely the right partner for Sashank bhaiya. I’m so glad he agreed to get married and settle down.”

  “Me too! As one gets older, it’s the company that matters: somebody who is loving and caring, somebody who is willing to listen when you need them in sorrow and pain or happiness. Sashank bhaiya was not ready initially, but was satisfied when I gave examples.”

  “Examples? Like?” He listened intently to Roshni and enjoyed her conversation.

  “For example, Akash bhaiya eventually will get married. Who knows if he would even continue to stay here. What if his job demands him to move out of Mumbai? Kaki is getting old. There is this unpredictability with old age, and…” She thought for some time.

  “And…?” He interrupted her thought process.

  Roshni continued, “And you, you are already in the US. When you visit India, you are a guest here, and who knows what the future will hold for you. Regarding me, I am here for the next five or six months maximum, and after that, I am gone too!”

  Deepak was disturbed when she said this, but waited for her to finish.

  “So you see, several uncertainties, and it is impo
rtant for him to have a partner who is understanding and caring. I am glad Kusum didi also found somebody. This was a perfect match for both of them.”

  Deepak was very disturbed at the thought of her leaving; he was not ready to accept this. He looked at her. “Roshni, would you mind if I said something?”

  “Hmm, go ahead.”

  “Roshni, I was very immature and stupid to have said those things on our wedding night. I know it devastated you and–”

  Roshni stopped him. “Deepak, it is all past now. Yes, I was depressed. Umm…even today I feel the heartache when I think of those conversations, but I have resigned myself to move on. You said what you thought was right, and I think both of us should move on.” She added, “By the way, have you applied for a divorce?”

  Deepak very emphatically said, “NO!”

  “Why not? Is there a problem? Do you need my signatures on any papers? You should have brought them this time…” and she went on, and finally Deepak got so frustrated of this topic he demanded, “Roshni, can you stop talking of this, please?”

  She became silent and waited for him to continue.

  They were almost done with their lunch and were waiting for the waiter to clean the table.

  “Roshni…” He struggled to find the right words and had to choose his words carefully. “Roshni, I have not applied for divorce and…”

  Roshni waited for him to finish.

  He held her hand and…

  He was interrupted by the waiter.

  Deepak took a deep breath. “Let’s leave, Roshni, and continue this conversation in the car.”

  Roshni agreed, and they went out to the car.

  Roshni was quiet, waiting for Deepak to talk, and he was focused on his driving within the city, maneuvering through the crowded roads.

  “Good choice of dishes, Roshni, good food. Thanks.”

  Roshni nodded her head and acknowledged him.

  “What was I saying? Haan yes, Roshni, although we never talked much after I left for the US, I am so proud of you for your decision, your firm resolution to fulfill the promise you made to your babuji.”

  “Yes, one down, and one more to go!”

  “What, what do you mean?” he exclaimed.

  “I was successful in convincing Sashank bhaiya to marry; now it is Akash bhaiya’s turn.”

  “Why? Do you have somebody in mind for him as well?”

  “No, not yet, but I would like to find somebody. He is beginning to feel very lonely, and I can see that he prefers company now, and this is a good sign. I am positive he will be open to meeting a girl if introduced,” she said very confidently.

  Deepak was so impressed with her confidence. “Did you talk to him as to what type of girl he wanted?”

  “Very briefly one time when both of us attended Ravi Shankar’s meeting, and I was happy he opened up to me very honestly.”

  Deepak was curious. “Really, what did he say?”

  Roshni knew he was curious. She looked at him. “He prefers somebody like Kusum bhabhi: educated but simple, very caring, and understanding. He is spiritual so it is natural for him to expect somebody with those interests.”

  “What if he finds that the girl is not spiritual?” he asked her instantly.

  “So what? The girl being from a good family and having good values is more important. Initially, every relationship has its ups and downs, but with loyalty, faithfulness and resolution, both partners can make it work. It is all about perceptions and flexibility,” she emphasized.

  She took every opportunity to emphasize these qualities in a relationship so Deepak would not make the same mistake with other girls he may encounter. Deepak listened with interest to Roshni.

  It was past 4 p.m., and they agreed to take a break for chai before heading towards Lonawala.

  ~ ~ ~

  The weather was cooler near Lonawala. They enjoyed each other’s company and discussed various topics. Deepak was certainly delighted to have taken her on this trip. Of course, the discussion regarding him thanking her and divorce and Akash’s wedding was not complete yet, and Deepak made every attempt to gain Roshni’s attention so he could convey what was on his mind.

  They found a decent hotel to stay overnight in Lonawala and checked in. It was a small room with a double bed and a couple of reclining chairs. The weather was cloudy, and they were tired from driving, so they decided to take it easy.

  They walked around the narrow roads, admiring the beauty of the place. Shops crowded the streets, people chatted happily, vendors hawked, and women thronged to the carts for vegetables and fruits. They were bargaining in loud voices; the entire atmosphere was lively. They talked and walked for an hour and decided to have dinner at a small restaurant.

  The restaurant was a cozy place. They were seated in a corner close to a window, and the waiter brought a candle to make it a little more romantic for them. Deepak appreciated this gesture, and they looked at the menu and ordered a few items. Roshni told him if he was interested, he could order any non-vegetarian dishes. Deepak was a vegetarian and communicated the same to her. After some time, Roshni again asked him if he wanted to drink alcohol or beer, and said he should order it and she wouldn’t have any problem with it. Again, very emphatically, Deepak refused.

  “Roshni, what do you think? Just because I’m in the US does not mean I can eat anything I want or drink alcohol.”

  “I didn’t mean to offend you, but if you did…I mean, me being here should not stop you. You’re free to do whatever you want,” she replied. Roshni was very relieved to know that he neither drank nor had changed his food habits.

  “I am still a vegetarian, you know! As a matter of fact, many people in the US are also changing their food habits and becoming vegetarians for health reasons,” he said.

  The food arrived, and they ate their dinner.

  “So, Roshni, we started talking about a girl for Akash bhaiya and we got interrupted. So have you started looking for a girl for him?” he asked.

  “Not yet, but I will start soon. Like I said, he is ready to meet girls.”

  “Yes, we were talking about his expectations, if any, so what did he say?”

  “Poor guy. He has no expectations other than a simple, educated and homely girl.”

  “You talked about commitment and trust; what did you say? You believe that even if Akash does not find somebody with similar interests, for example, spiritualism, they could still be happy?”

  “Yes, of course!” replied Roshni.

  Deepak was interested to know her comments on this; she definitely spoke very confidently and had mature ideas. “This is a very interesting topic. I’d like to hear more about your beliefs and ideas.”

  “What is there to say?” she asked.

  Deepak urged her to elaborate.

  “When two individuals, a boy and a girl, commit to a marriage and have faith that both of them will be honest with each other and communicate openly, both will give one hundred percent effort to make it work. In the process they discover each other, understand each other, and – aah! – it is so beautiful to look for any surprises. Eventually love, friendship, care, compassion…all these kick in. Of course, initially there will be arguments or, rather, differences in opinions, but this is natural. Both of them grew up in different environments so their perceptions and beliefs are different, but with time, all this will amalgamate into ‘our’ philosophies and ‘our’ values. I think this is a wonderful experience for both of them!”

  Then she looked at him. “Deepak, these don’t mean anything to you because your philosophy is different.”

  Deepak acknowledged that his philosophy regarding marriage was indeed different, but now, she had changed his perceptions. “Roshni, you believe in arranged marriages, don’t you?”

  “Those are the ideals I have been brought up with, so how can I think differently. Moreover, I think it is a matter of respecting your parents as well,” she said politely.

  Both were almost done with their dinner
, and they waited for the waiter to bring the check.

  “You entrust your parents to find you a groom or a bride, but there are failures too!” he said.

  Instantly, Roshni replied, “There are failures with love marriages too! As I said before, if the girl or boy enters into a relationship with a lot of expectations or preconceived notions, there are bound to be disappointments, and if we do not have the strength and courage to face these, then failures occur.”

  “Roshni, I am impressed with your thinking and attitude…very nice.”

  It was about 9 p.m., and they had remained longer than expected at the restaurant. They walked back to the hotel, which was only a short distance away.

  Once they reached their room, they changed into their nightclothes and sat in front of the TV, relaxing in the chairs. Roshni had her feet up and folded in an easy pose; she had her eyes closed and appeared to be in deep thought.

  “Roshni, are you okay?”

  Roshni opened her eyes and nodded in affirmation.

  “Roshni, your thoughts regarding marriage are very mature. Do you think if boys and girls are open, ardent and diligent, marriages will be successful?” He repeated this question. He wanted to see how flexible she was if he apologized to her and wanted to continue this relationship.

  “As long as the promise, dedication and honesty are there from both partners,” she replied and emphasized honesty. She wanted him to know that to build credibility and have conviction, honesty with each other was important.

  “What do you mean?”

  “If only one person has unwavering faith and determination, it may not be successful because one person is giving more than one hundred percent to make it work while the other, with all the preconceived notions, is always hesitant; in this case, it is a failure.”

  “Do you know of any examples here?” he enquired out of curiosity.

  Roshni paused for a few seconds in thought and then blurted out, “Look at us. We are a great example.”

  Deepak was surprised. He looked at her with a questioning expression.

  Roshni shrugged her shoulders. “You believe in ‘love marriage’, whereas I believe in ‘love after marriage’. So I had entered this relationship with one hundred percent commitment and trust. The day you told me of your opinions, I knew this relationship would not be successful, and hence it was a wise decision to separate.”