by Catori, Ava
Becky closed her eyes, and as he moved the slightest bit closer, he parted his lips and met hers. Time stood still, and as she felt his mouth on hers, Becky swore she might drop dead in that very instant. It was the single best moment of her life, and as he kissed her sweetly, his lips soft and most importantly against hers, she sighed, literally sighed into his mouth.
This must be what heaven is like, she thought. It had to be, because there was no other way to describe the magic she was feeling. As Reed kissed her, Becky’s brain swirled with a rainbow of colors. Slowly he lifted his hand to her hair, and raked his fingers through her soft blonde curls. Her hair was like silk, and gripping the back of her head gently, he pulled her closer.
Reed’s kiss got hungrier, more passionate, and just as he suspected kissing Becky Holgate was everything he hoped it would be.
Becky’s mind was exploding, and with every second that passed, she expected it to stop, just end, be over, and for Reed to jump up and realize it was a mistake. She wanted to enjoy it without the thoughts rushing through her brain, but they wouldn’t stop. She was in a war with her own mind.
Reed leaned her back and pressed into her, as if he couldn’t get enough. Oh shit, this was truly happening.
Pulling back just for a second, Reed looked at Becky, and then went back in for another kiss. Stunned but elated, Becky greedily accepted every single kiss he offered. Finally relaxing into the moment, she reached up and ran her fingers through his dark hair. Her fires were burning, and with every minute that passed, she shed the shyness she wore. She wanted Reed; the moisture between her legs told her what she already knew.
As their kisses slowed, Reed smiled. “I desperately wanted to kiss you the other night at the coffee shop,” was all he said. He would have said more, but his lips were back on Becky’s.
“Wow,” Becky whispered, as they came up for air.
Reed pulled back and stood, “I’m sorry.”
“Sorry? Where did that come from?” Becky was confused. One second he was practically on top of her, and the next he was apologizing.
“I threw myself on you. I should have given you some space. I’m not really sure what’s going on,” he said, now pacing. “I’m drawn to you like a bee to honey, and yet I’m just out of a relationship. The idea that you had a date and somebody else might step in before I could kind of freaked me out.”
Becky watched the man teeter between assertion and confusion. “Reed, are you sure you want to be here?”
“Very sure,” he said looking at her. “Why, do you question that?”
“It’s just that you only called off your engagement last night, and yet here you are in my living room today. Don’t you need time to heal? Time to make sure you’re doing the right thing?”
“I am doing the right thing.”
“You walked away from a long term relationship on a whim. What if you regret your decision?”
“I can’t stop thinking about you,” he sighed.
“You barely know me.”
Reed dropped his head. “I don’t know what I want.” He sat back down. “It all happened so fast. I thought I was getting married, and then you walked in, and it’s like a fog lifted. Suddenly my world had color again.”
Becky smiled hearing his description, but she knew he wasn’t ready to jump from one relationship to another. He needed to be sure. “I think you need to absorb what happened still. If this is what you want after you’ve taken time to heal from your break up, I’ll be here with open arms, but to just jump so quickly, quite honestly it concerns me. Don’t get me wrong, I want nothing more than for you to kiss me again,” she said softly, “but I don’t think you’re ready for this.”
Reed looked at Becky. He hated how impulsive he felt, when she was all calm and logical. His insides were melting like heated butter, but she had a point. It all happened so fast. He needed time; time to figure out exactly what he wanted.
“I should go,” he said quietly.
“I wish you’d stay, just for a little while.”
Reed nodded and sat down. “I feel like a fool.”
“You? Why? Oh my gosh, you made my day,” she gushed.
“I did?”
“If you haven’t noticed, I have a massive crush on you, but I just don’t want you to jump into something before you’re ready.”
It was intense, there were emotions flying, and neither knew what to do.
A loud crash from the bedroom had Becky groaning. “Bad kitty,” she yelled out. “Excuse me,” she said turning toward Reed. “I’ll be right back. I need to see what Bella destroyed this time.”
She found Bella sitting on her bed, all innocent, licking her paw. “What did you do?” She walked around the bed, and saw her alarm clock tossed on the floor. That damn cat.
Reed was leaning on the doorframe to her bedroom. “Is everything okay?”
She nodded slowly. “Just the cat,” she said softly. He looked so hot, all masculine and muscled, and so freaking handsome. Becky stopped talking.
Walking over, Reed reached out and pulled her into his arms. Looking down, he tipped her chin up and kissed her.
She could barely breathe. Becky was in trouble. She was falling fast, and if he kept kissing her like this, she’d lose any sense she had left.
Pulling back, Becky sighed, “We need to talk.” She hated, absolutely hated that her sensible side was kicking in. She wanted this, wanted him, but was terrified he wasn’t thinking things through. Barely any time had elapsed, and he was kicking into high gear. They needed time and space, and he needed to make sure he was heading in the right direction.
Reed arched an eyebrow, “About?”
“I hate myself for saying this,” she started, but he dotted her lips with kisses and then left a trail across her jaw, and down along her neck.
“Then don’t,” he got out between tiny nibbles.
“Reed, you’re moving too fast. It feels so good, but you’re not ready for this.”
“Shhh,” he whispered, nuzzling into her, milking her skin with his lips.
Becky’s entire body tingled. Tilting her head to the side, she let him continue. All thoughts, any common sense left her mind, and the only thing she could focus on was the insanely attractive man nibbling on her neck.
Inhaling deeply, she picked up on hints of his cologne, masculine and woodsy. She wanted nothing more than for him to make sweet love to her. Becky closed her eyes, sinking deeper and deeper into the sensations Reed was offering. Her knees went weak, and as her heart bounced around, all full of pitter patter, she finally let go.
Reed’s hands slid down her back, resting on the curve of her bottom, and with a small groan, he squeezed her gently.
Finally coming up for air, Reed smiled at Becky. “Maybe we could go out on a date sometime?”
“I’d like that,” she answered breathlessly.
Chapter 13
Saying good-bye, Becky felt all gooey inside. She wanted to pinch herself to make sure she wasn’t dreaming. He was really here, and a great kisser, and wow when he squeezed her ass and groaned she about died.
Closing the door behind him, she thought about his mouth on hers, his hands running through her hair, and his delicious aroma. She practically floated to the sofa, and sinking into it, she closed her eyes, this time remembering his lips on her neck, nibbling, nuzzling, and suckling her skin.
Drifting on the high of the evening, Becky realized if she died right now, right here on this spot, she’d die a happy woman. Reed Amwell had not only left his fiancée to be with her, but he showed up on her doorstep the very next day.
With the weekend coming, Becky planned to focus on her business. Reed would be unavailable as he’d be helping Jessica move out. She was moving in with a friend for now, and as difficult as it was, he offered his truck and himself to make the move go as smoothly as possible.
It was still incredibly painful for her, but when it came down to it, Jessica had an ulterior motive. He’d certainly
change his mind if he was involved in the move. The reality of her leaving, it would hit him, and he’d ask her to stay telling her it was all a mistake.
Jessica could have asked other people to help her move, but by having him there, she hoped he’d come to his senses. She knew he still loved her. She didn’t know what was going on with him, but she was convinced it was cold feet. You don’t just throw away a relationship like this without a reason. They weren’t over yet, she was sure of it.
As hurt and angry as she was the other day, she refused to let go. Reed was her life. It’s not like he even found out about Matthew, not that it mattered, she had ended this with him months ago. Sure she had a tiny affair, but when Reed finally came around and proposed after what felt like forever, she knew he was committed. That was all it took to end things with Matthew.
It’s not like she loved the guy, it was purely for the sex anyway. Matthew was a co-worker that filled a need. She wasn’t attached to the guy, but for a while, he offered her the thrill that she needed. Frustrated after years of dating Reed, and his refusal to take their relationship to the next step, she couldn’t help but stray. Now that it was all behind her, they could move forward. Maybe that’s all this was, maybe he had an itch, or cold feet, or whatever. She’d soothe things over, and remind him why they belonged together.
On moving day, Jessica showed up bright and early, only she left her friend at home. Opening the door, Reed looked confused. “I thought Gina was coming to help you.”
“I thought we should talk first,” she said walking in. Slowly stripping off her shirt, she turned around to reveal the lace teddy beneath her clothing.
Reed shut her down before she could start. “Don’t.”
“This is a mistake,” she pleaded her case. “Reed, baby, you love me.”
“I do love you, Jess, but I’m not in love with you. It’s time for us to go our separate ways.”
Pulling her shirt back over her head, she was furious. “I’ll send for my things,” she spat out, walking out the door. The pain she felt ripped her to shreds, and as Jessica left her shattered heart on the floor, Reed closed the door behind her.
Sitting, Reed’s heart felt heavy. He didn’t want it to end this way, but he knew it was what he had to do. The least he could do was start sorting through some stuff. He wanted nothing more than to put it off, go for a run, or find a healthy distraction, but the work had to get done.
There was so much to do. Jessica had pulled a lot of her clothes and shoes, but they still had to sort through their home office, the kitchen, and decide what was what. He missed Bean, but she made it clear that there was no way she’d be able to exist without him. He’d gotten attached to the little dog, but knew he was her baby. After breaking her heart, he couldn’t fight for Bean too. The house felt empty and quiet. Without Jess here, or Bean wondering about, he wondered what it would be like to live alone again. It had been such a long time since he was alone – and here he was ready to jump into another relationship.
Maybe it was a mistake. Maybe he should slow down, take some time, but there was something about Becky Holgate that drew him in. He wanted to be around her, and yet how could he offer himself fully if he was still getting over this past relationship. The more he thought about the details, the more they overwhelmed him. That run sounded like a good idea, and clearing his head was the only thing he could muster right now.
Covered in sweat after a good run, Reed climbed into the shower. He should call Becky and see if she’s free. Maybe they could go out. There he went again, jumping in without taking time to breathe. On second thought, get the work done around the house. He’d sort through the files in the home office and separate their stuff. It was tedious work, but it wouldn’t do itself.
It was in the third file drawer. Going through stacks of paper, he found the card haphazardly shoved underneath. He didn’t recognize it. Picking it up, he opened it with curiosity. He felt ill seeing the note written inside, with a date drawn in a heart. Who the fuck was Matthew, and why was it dated during their relationship?
Reed got up and pushed the file cabinet over in disgust. No words could take away the pain he was feeling. She cheated on him, and no amount of denial could take away the words he saw. Everything inside of him bunched up. Wanting to slam a hole through the wall, he stopped himself and started pacing. How could she have done this to him? They were getting married. He was a fool to believe she’d been faithful all this time. Reed crumpled into the office chair and dropped his head into his hands as the hot tears fell. How long had it gone on, and was she going to run into his arms?
He felt like a fool. All this time he thought he was the only one. Fuck her.
Becky sat reading the tutorial, trying to figure out how to make a website. She might have to rely on one of those quickie cheap sites that were like clunky building blocks. At least she’d have a presence. Now that she had a couple of people, she needed to work on her professional angle. How could they take her seriously as a business owner, if she couldn’t even make a website? She’d eventually have to pay somebody, but it’s not like she had a lot of money to work with.
Flipping through other dating websites, she felt overwhelmed. What was she thinking, trying to get this business off the ground? It was silly to believe she could do it all by herself. Feeling defeated, Becky gave up in that moment, but only for a second. No, you need to start somewhere, so just start from square one. You can do this.
Looking at the applications, she made some calls, trying to set up her first date. She had two guys, and she had to at least try. How else would she reach her dream if she didn’t start somewhere? Becky felt better after talking to one of the girls, telling her about a potential date match. The woman was excited, and said yes to the guy Becky had proposed. Now she had to call him and make the match. They could meet at an agreed upon location, keeping it public for the first date. Becky asked the girl if she could have the guy email her, and then contacted him.
She squealed hanging up the phone. They would email each other to set their meet-up. She’d done it; she hooked up her first two people. They both liked outdoor activities, and had a love of nature. It was a start! Okay, now to figure out this stupid website. Maybe Reed could help her after all. She hated to ask, but he had offered before. She didn’t want to bother him, since he was helping Jessica move out today. The thought of them alone together made her nervous. Her worst fear was that he’d realize what a mistake it was and want Jessica back.
Becky was torn between wanting to give him time to deal with the split, and being afraid if she waited too long he’d change his mind about her. When he kissed her, wow, and all she wanted was the chance to kiss him again. Becky got lost remembering their kiss again. Closing her eyes, she pictured him in front of her.
Sheepishly grinning, she went to her nightstand and pulled out a vibrator. With a daydream and an image of Reed, Becky took matters into her own hands, sinking back into the sofa, remembering that kiss and him nuzzling into her neck.
Relaxed and breathing ragged after an orgasm, Becky smiled and went back to her desk. She’d figure out this website once and for all. Buried in tutorials, she was finally making the tiniest bit of leeway when the doorbell rang.
Standing, her brain still wrapped around details of the tutorial instructions, she opened the door. Reed was the last person she expected to see. Only, he didn’t look at her dreamily, he looked like a crushed little boy.
“Are you okay?” She opened the door wider, inviting him in.
“Yeah, I mean, I guess.”
“What happened?”
“Just something with Jess,” he said, his voice hurting.
Here it comes; he’s going to tell her he got back together with Jessica. Becky braced herself for the news.
“Anyway, it’s over. There’s no going back.”
Becky didn’t know whether to be relieved or feel bad for the guy. He looked broken. “Can I ask?”
“I’m not ready to talk about
it.”
“I understand,” she said following him into the living room. “Can I offer you a beer?”
It was in that moment that she saw the pink vibrator standing proud and at attention on her coffee table. Reed must have seen it at the same time. In slow motion he turned around and grinned. Becky panicked and ran for the table.
Reed reached it before she did and picked up the sex toy, holding it up. “What have we here? Have you been participating in extra-curricular activities?” His voice teased, and she wanted to fade into the walls, blending in unseen.
Becky’s eyes opened wide, and as she turned fifteen shades of red, she started babbling nonsense. “That’s not mine, I mean, it’s mine, it’s umm, not what it looks like, okay, it’s totally what it looks like, holy shit I’m horrified. I didn’t think, I mean, I didn’t expect you, oh my gosh, I’m going to die of embarrassment. God, strike me down now.”
The corners of his mouth turned up, smiling at her attempt to squirm out of the predicament. She was so cute. “What is it? I wonder what this button does,” he said turning it on. Laughing, he watched as the tip rotated and the base vibrated. “Oh Becky, you naughty girl,” he teased.
The whirring of the battery stunned her. She stood frozen like a deer caught in headlights. Finally snapping out of the horror, Becky went to grab it from him, to hide the evidence, but he raised his arm up, holding it out of her reach.
“Reed, give that to me!”
“Becky, Becky, Becky…does your mother know about this?” He said mockingly, and added a few “tsk, tsk, tsk” sounds to hammer home the effect of complete humiliation.
“She’d die, like I’m dying of embarrassment right now,” Becky clamored, trying to get the sex toy from the man in her living room.
Lowering his arm, he brought it to his face and inhaled. If she could have died on the spot, she would have. “Very nice,” he whispered. He finally lowered his arm and gave it to her. “Here you go,” he smiled.
Becky looked down and quickly ran to her bedroom, shoving it in her nightstand drawer. She’d never live this one down. She’d never been so mortified in her life. Okay, there was one time when her pants fell down during college, when her elastic band snapped in her slacks, and right there in the middle of the campus down they went, but this easily ranked as the second most embarrassing moment of her life. Okay, wait, that’s not true, maybe the third or fourth most embarrassing, but it was up there.