Star Fish

by Nicola May

  What a prat. I was so pleased that I didn’t fancy him.

  ‘Thanks for your honesty. Better to be knocked back before you’ve jumped the first hurdle rather than fall face first into the water jump.’ I replied, putting a brave face on this whole awful situation.

  ‘We’ll get some posh nosh anyway,’ he added. ‘And if we can bear each other after the meal, a free weekend away somewhere cool as well.’

  At that precise moment I thought that if Nick were the last man on earth I wouldn’t even go to Bognor with him.

  We were to dine at The Oxo Tower. On arrival, I was impressed at how cool this place was. We were seated in a corner, for ease of filming, but still had magnificent views of London, due to the restaurant’s trendy, elevated glass structure. Nick, however, was a very uncool person. After the starter I’d decided that it was going to be hard to make the best of a bad job. We said and did all the right things for the cameras but both knew that when we said goodbye after the show next Saturday, that would be the last we would ever see of each other.

  – Thirty Four –

  Pisces: Make an effort to pamper yourself this week. A change is as good as a rest.

  ‘It was an experience anyway,’ Brad said encouragingly over lunch the following Sunday.

  ‘I guess so,’ I sighed.

  ‘At least now if anyone recognises you they’ll instantly know you’re single.’

  ‘Yes, thanks for that Brad,’ I said. ‘How did your meal go with Jon last night, by the way?’ I mentioned it casually, not wanting Brad to think it was any big deal. I knew that he was feeling a bit guilty going out with somebody else so soon after Sean.

  ‘It was really special, Amy. I like him a lot. He respects that I want to take things slowly and that makes me like him even more.’

  ‘Jon is a lovely guy. I’m really pleased for you, babe.’

  I breezed into work on Monday, taking no notice of the jibes from colleagues about my disastrous date with Mr Cancer. Even Mr Parkinson had a word to say.

  ‘A crabby crab is not good enough for someone like you, young Amy.’

  ‘Thanks, Mr P.’

  I was actually quite touched. Until he backed it up with, ‘Mind you it would be every man’s dream to be able to climb back into his shell and get away from a woman’s nagging.’

  I think that every man must have a rising Cancer sign, as don’t they all do that anyway – retreat when the going gets tough? However, I was not going to be on a hate men mission. I was too partial to my entire bra collection to burn any of them, plus I didn’t think a pair of DMs would suit me. It was a Piscean’s prerogative to change her mind. I would now take control of my own destiny. I had swum right to the bottom of the ocean; I would now swim back up to the surface and the light again.

  I decided a change of image was required for this new start. I also wanted to be

  looking good for the pending school reunion disco that Anna had persuaded me to go to.

  Despite my announcement at the dinner party, I would telephone Christopher and face a new date. The new self-aware, self-confident Amy Jane Anderson would be ready for anyone and anything.

  I took an afternoon off, went to the hairdressers and had my hair dyed dark brown and cut into a trendy style. I had a manicure, pedicure and facial. And finally, an hour – long Swedish massage. I was broke by the end of it but I felt good and ready to face anything that the world had to throw at me. It was time to phone Starr & Sun.

  ‘Oh hi Cordelia, is Chris around?’

  ‘Amy dear, how lovely to hear from you. How are you?’

  ‘I’m fine thanks, Cordelia, I’m really fine.’

  ‘Amy, to what do we owe this pleasure?’ Chris’s voice was animated.

  ‘I’m ready for another’ I said dramatically.

  Fate was however to play its trump card and the ‘another’ I was ready for was not quite the one that I’d predicted!

  It hadn’t taken that much persuasion from Anna to get me to attend the school reunion disco.

  ‘It’ll get you back into the social swing with your new image,’ she had declared the previous Saturday over a cup of coffee at my place.

  ‘I’ll come with you, Ames. I would hate to walk in on my own if it was me,’ she said caringly. ‘I doubt if I’ll know many people as it’s a reunion for your year, so if you find that you’re having a good time and meeting lots of people you remember, then I’ll leave you to it. If not we can just get pissed together anyway.’

  The reunion was taking place in the local Village Hall. This venue had evidently been chosen due to its proximity to the school, plus the fact it could accommodate comfortably the hundred or so expected ex-students.

  I felt a flutter of nerves as we walked across to the makeshift bar. A glitter ball was spinning in the middle of the room. Red, blue and yellow lights were flashing and I was thrown back in time to our old school hall and the many discos that took place there. The familiar sound of the 1980s hit my ears. ‘Club Tropicana’ was blaring out. I had forgotten how much I had loved Wham. Thank goodness I didn’t know way back then that George Michael would never have serenaded me personally with ‘Careless Whisper’ – it would have ruined me for life.

  ‘Amy, great to see you. How are you doing?’ A short blonde girl came running over to me. She was dressed in a pink mini-skirt and a pink and white spotted, cut off T-shirt. It could have been another one of Cordelia’s sisters.

  ‘Hi,’ I said casually, not having any recollection of her whatsoever.

  ‘I didn’t realise it was fancy dress,’ I said biding time for my memory to kick in.

  ‘It’s not,’ the short girl replied, not offended in any way by this comment. It was

  then the penny dropped. The freckles, the turned-up nose – it had to be Angela Addington. She had never been very bright although she compensated for it by being the school gossip.

  Even way back then she had an appalling dress sense.

  ‘Angie,’ I said falsely. ‘You look great.’

  ‘So do you, Amy. Amazing what a bit of weight loss can do, isn’t it?’

  Bitch! Angie continued. ‘So what have you been doing over the past decade and a half?’

  It was then I realised what a bad move coming to a school reunion was. Did I really want everyone to know that I was still single at thirty-three? Did I really want to tell now complete strangers what I had or hadn’t been doing for the past however many years?

  By the third, ‘So what have you been up to? Married? Kids?’ I retreated with Anna to a quiet corner with a bottle of wine.

  It was at the exact moment when Michael (the music man) Matthews decided to play ‘Joanna’ by Kool and the Gang that I looked up and there he was. Will, all six-feet of him, with his trademark bright shirt, auburn hair, those beautiful eyes and now sporting a tan.

  He was casually leaning against the bar, surrounded by three girls from my old class, laughing, flirting and gesturing wildly. ‘Joanna’ always reminded me of him. One of his mates used to go out with a Joanna and the four of us all used to sing it at the top of our voices as we went somewhere or other in Will’s battered old Mini.

  I didn’t think he would be back from his travels so I was pleasantly surprised to see him.

  He must have sensed me looking, or should I say staring, as his eyes moved from the girls he was with and he looked straight at me. He smirked, excused himself and wandered over.

  ‘Just popping to the loo.’ Anna shouted over the music.

  ‘Hey, Amy, love of my life, have you recovered yet? I have to say it was a bit of a shocker seeing you at the track. Didn’t really think it would be your scene.’

  ‘Full of surprises, me. I have to say I wasn’t surprised that you would own such a place. How was your holiday, by the way?’ I could have kicked myself then as I’d given away that I had phoned him, hopefully he was too drunk to notice.

  ‘Great, great, anyway I don’t want to talk about me, how’s Blondie?’

 
; ‘If you are referring to Charlie, then I don’t know how he is.’ God, I still fancied him. He had the most amazing smile – and those eyes! Even his freckles were endearing.

  Anna returned clutching her stomach. ‘Ames, if you don’t mind I’m going to head off, not feeling too good. Will you be OK?’ She winked discreetly.

  Will then interrupted. ‘Anna Anderson, you haven’t changed a bit either. Come here and give me a snog.’ He kissed her on the cheek. ‘Of course your dear sister will be OK. How could she not be in the capable hands of one Mr William Wallingford?’

  ‘That’s what worries me.’ Anna joked.

  We saw my sister off and then Will jumped into the seat next to me.

  ‘It really is good to see you, you know, Ames. You look great, I like your new hair.’

  ‘Thanks. It’s weird seeing you again. It’s as if we’ve never been apart.’ I was completely flattered that he’d actually noticed my new hairstyle from the last time we met. But that was Will all over, charming to the core. He then looked at me with those eyes. If I’d been a ‘Funny Face’ ice-lolly I’d have melted all over the stick.

  ‘It took me six months to get over you running off you know, Ames.’

  I didn’t dare confess that after leaving him and running off with Mohican Man I realised what a big mistake I had made.

  ‘I’m sure it didn’t take you long to fill my shoes,’ I smiled.

  ‘Obviously I made them form an orderly queue.’ He still smelt the same. That gorgeous warm, musky smell. Time seemed to fly by; nobody else in the room seemed to matter. It wasn’t until ‘Oops Upside Your Head’ boomed out that Will jumped up.

  ‘Come on, Ames, we’ve got to do this for old time’s sake.’

  We hit the floor, Will wrapped his legs around me and I wrapped mine around Phil Jones from 3C. Then we were all swaying from side to side not forgetting one single move. It was just like being at a school disco. In fact, I hadn’t had so much fun for ages.

  The song came to an end and we all jumped up laughing.

  ‘And now, folks, let’s see if we can all smooch like we did back in the good old days,’ Music Michael announced. ‘Smooch’ – it was a long time since I’d heard that word and even longer since I’d carried out the act itself.

  Will looked right into my eyes. ‘Fancy a smooch, old bird?’

  ‘Rude not to, ex-lurver,’ I smiled.

  I blame Randy Crawford for me falling in love all over again with Will Wallingford.

  As on the first bar of ‘One Day I’ll Fly Away’ he held me gently at first and then kept moving his hands down to my bum and I kept moving them up, just like the old days. I wanted to kiss him there and then but sensing Angie Addington watching our every move and imagining the playground gossip the next day I resisted.

  We walked outside together.

  ‘Need a lift?’ he offered.

  ‘Thought you were drinking?’

  ‘I’ve only had a couple, got an early start tomorrow.’

  ‘Yes, that would be cool, if you don’t mind thanks.’

  Gone were the days of getting a ‘backie’ on his bike before he got his Mini.

  ‘Got the van tonight, I’m afraid.’

  At that precise moment I wouldn’t have cared if the delicious Will Wallingford had still got his Chopper! I hopped in to the W.W. Go-Karts – Dare or be Square van and felt like a teenager again. We pulled up outside number 21. I wanted to try and be cool but it didn’t seem to matter as even after all this time I felt like I knew him so well.

  ‘Coffee?’ I enquired.

  ‘There is nothing I’d like more, babe, but I’ve got an early start tomorrow.’ I’d avoided the girlfriend question up until now but I just had to know.

  ‘Guess you’ve got to get home to your girlfriend as well?’ I said sheepishly.

  The baggage warning signs were ringing on deaf ears again. All I wanted to do was grab him there and then and kiss him.

  ‘Actually we split up when we got back from holiday. Being together 24/7 made me realise that I fancied the single life again.’

  Thank goodness relief didn’t express itself as a noise, as the sound of a red arrows fly past, would have come out of my mouth at that precise moment. Instead I just said,

  ‘Oh, right.’

  ‘Come here, sexy,’ Will urged. He leaned over to my side of the van, held my chin up, looked right into my eyes and gave me the most passionate, toe-curling kiss I had ever had in my life. We came up for air after about ten minutes.

  ‘Wow,’ Will gasped. ‘I’d forgotten just how sexy you were.’ He then looked at his watch. ‘Look, Ames, I really must go but give me your number this time. You’re not running away from me again.’

  I dutifully gave him my mobile number.

  ‘See you later, Alligator.’ he shouted out of the window as he pulled off at breakneck speed.

  The next morning I called a conference at Sam’s flat. Katie had now moved in. There seemed to be more candles alight than ever.

  ‘Thought we needed a good karma as it’s obviously ground-breaking relationship news,’ Katie laughed. It was so good to see her and Sam so happy. Anna had even made it.

  ‘Stomach all right now sis?’ I asked.

  ‘Yeah, fine thanks. Just popped another one of Sam’s wonder pills.’

  Brad arrived with Jon. H had terrible morning sickness so had stayed at home. Liv was slumped in the corner wearing dark glasses.

  ‘Yes, yes, I’m here in body, Minger, left a lovely warm Jack in my bed so this had better be good.’

  ‘Good is too insignificant a word for this one, chaps,’ I announced. ‘I’ve found the man I want to spend the rest of my life with.’

  I then proceeded to tell them what a wonderful evening I’d had with Will at the reunion and how, just after one kiss, I knew that this felt right. I was so excited.

  ‘I never believed it before when people said they knew as soon as they met the right person as they got the “this is it” feeling, but now I’ve got it myself. I want to marry him. I love him!’

  Sam sounded despairing. ‘Oh Amy, I’m so pleased for you if this is it, but do take care. I’m not sure after one kiss you can get us all buying hats.’

  I was a bit disgruntled after this comment.

  ‘Please support me on this one. I’ve never been so sure in my whole life.’

  My mobile then beeped. Everyone waited in anticipation for me to read the text message.

  I REALLY ENJOYED LAST NIGHT I CAN’T STOP THINKING ABOUT YOU

  ‘Told you, told you!’ I shrieked.

  Another beep: PICK YOU UP FROM YOURS TOMORROW AT 8

  ‘That’s a bit presumptuous isn’t it,’ Brad said critically.

  ‘He can be as presumptuous as he likes,’ I replied recklessly.

  ‘Just take care, Amy. He has only just split from his girlfriend, you know.’

  ‘Brad, trust me on this one. This is the first time in my life that something feels completely right.’

  – Thirty Five –

  Pisces: Unexpected developments create a stir in a personal relationship. Make the most of it but take care not to wear your heart on your sleeve.

  Eight o’clock came and went. Nine o’clock came and went. I’d played my new Beyonce album three times over. I didn’t want to call to hassle him, but by nine thirty I was beginning to get annoyed. I’d been out and got my hair blow-dried especially. I’d even gone out at lunchtime and bought a new sexy top from an expensive designer boutique. I nervously phoned his mobile nervously and was greeted with: ‘The mobile you are calling is switched off, please try again later.’ Must be in a bad signal area, I thought. By the time ten o’clock came I actually hated the bitch on the end of the line constantly getting in the way of my pending marriage. My inner voice was telling me to remain calm. I completely ignored it.

  ‘Liv, it’s me.’

  ‘Thought you’d be meeting the vicar by now,’ she riposted.

  ‘He hasn’t turne
d up.’

  ‘Oh babe, his text messages were so positive there must be a genuine reason. Tell you what get your make-up off and get ready for bed and he’s bound to turn up. It’s always the way.’

  But it didn’t work and I hardly slept for worrying that my fairytale was over before it had even begun. I got a phone call at 7 a.m. the next morning; my eyes were barely open.

  ‘Amy, its Will. I am so, so sorry. We had a big group in last night and Vince took it on himself not to turn in. I tried to get away but couldn’t. The battery went flat on my mobile and that’s the only place I have your number. I’ll make it up to you, I promise. I’m not around tonight but I can see you Wednesday.’

  ‘OK,’ I replied sleepily. ‘Look forward to it.’ I looked over at Pen who was lying on the pillow next to me. He opened one eye and then shut it again as if to say, ‘Oh no, not again.’

  It took an age for Wednesday to come. All day the same butterflies were fluttering in my stomach as I’d felt every time I was due to meet up with Will all those years ago.

  At eight o’clock on the dot the doorbell rang. I smiled a big smile.

  ‘Hi babe, I’m here. So sorry again for the other night.’ He took a step back, looked me up and down and let out a whistle. ‘Wow, Amy, you look amazing. Age certainly does become you!’

  I’d put on the same expensive top I’d bought for Monday night that revealed enough cleavage to be sexy without looking like a strumpet. I’d also put on a skirt, which was quite unlike me for a first date. But this was no ordinary date. I was going out with Will Wallingford, the man I was going to marry.

  ‘Thought we could go for a curry,’ Will announced.

  ‘That’s great. I love curry.’

  Even his presumption that I’d want to go for a curry didn’t bother me. If he’d

  said we were going to a supermarket restaurant I would not have cared. I just wanted to

  be with this gorgeous-smelling, gorgeous-looking, gorgeous kisser of a man.

  Half an hour later, I thought I’d died and gone to heaven, for not only was I in The Curry Castle, my favourite Indian restaurant, I was here with Will Wallingford, my first love. The journey to the restaurant had been a bit hairy, mind. His flash Aston Martin went faster in first gear than my old heap went in fourth. He drove like he was on his go-kart track!