I got to wondering what he would call his next book. Barjack, Over the Hill, or maybe Barjack Grows Old or Barjack’s All Washed Up. I damn near laughed out loud, and I thunk that I would maybe suggest them there titles to the scribbler my own self. I tuck another drink, and then I said out loud but really to no one but my own self, “No, I ain’t neither. I ain’t washed up, and I ain’t too old. I’ll show them all, including that damned pettifogger and the scribbler. I’ll get that goddamned murdering bastard myself with my Merwin and Hulbert. Or maybe I’ll begin to toting a shotgun along with me wherever I go. I’d like to see the son of a bitch disappear on a shotgun. It’d damn sure leave a visible blood smear where he had used to be.”
I dranked down the second glass a’ whiskey and poured me a third, and then Bonnie come back into the room. “Happy’s down yonder at the outdoor landing,” she said, “and Butcher’s down here at the other end.”
“Good,” I said. “Now you come here to me.” I had done talked myself into feeling better by then, and I grabbed Bonnie by her fat arm and pulled her onto the bed with me. “You and me has got some unfinished business together.”
“Oh, Barjack,” she said.
Chapter Nineteen
Now, I’m here to tell you that things changed considerable around Asininity about that time. That son of a bitch Cody had got us all as nervous as a cottontail rabbit looking straight into a whole passel a’ hungry coyotes. For the next week ever’one seed Cody somewhere or nother. But he disappeared right after he was saw. It got to where I was expecting to see the bastard around ever’ corner I come to. And I damn sure do believe that Bonnie and Miller and Polly and Dingle and both a’ my depitties was all the same way. The onliest one what weren’t acting thattaway was ole Sly the Widdamaker. Nothing in the world seemed to be able to ruffle him one goddamned bit. I tell you, I never seed no one as cool as Sly. Not in my whole life.
I was a-setting in my marshaling office in the middle a’ one afternoon. I didn’t really have no reason to be in there. I just wanted to assert my ass some, I guess, let ever’one know I was still the law in town, and ole Happy, he was a-setting in there too. I didn’t say nothing about Happy just setting around on account a’ to tell you the whole and plain truth, I was glad to have some company. I had just tuck out my bottle a’ stash from my desk drawer and was a-reaching for two glasses when the door come a-flying open. My hand went straight to my Merwin and Hulbert, and Happy, what was a-setting with his back to the door, jumped up and hauled out his Colt. But it wasn’t no Cody.
It was ole Butcher what come in, and he was a-staggering and holding his head, and his head was bloody too. He looked around and spied a chair setting against one a’ the walls, and staggered over to it and dropped down in a setting position. He moaned right out loud.
“Butcher,” Happy said, putting away his Colt.
I come out from behint my desk and headed for him. “What the hell happened?” I ast him.
“I was walking down this way from the Hooch House,” Butcher said, “and I walked by that space between two buildings down there, you know, and someone hit me on the head. I guess he come outta that dark space. He hit me hard, and I went down. I think I was knocked out for a spell. I don’t know how fucking long. Anyhow, when I come around, I got up and headed down here.”
“Did you get a look at him?” Happy ast.
“I never,” Butcher said, “but it was that goddamn Cody.”
“How do you know that?” I ast.
“Who the hell else could it a’ been?”
“Happy,” I said, “walk Butcher over to the doc’s, and then fetch the Widdamaker and send him over here.”
“Yes, sir,” said Happy. He helped Butcher to stand up, and he steadied him whilst he walked, and they went outta the office and headed for Doc’s. I set back down behint my desk and pulled out my six-gun and laid it on the desk in front a’ me. I thunk about it for a minute. Then I jumped up and went over to the gun rack and got me a shotgun. I made sure it was loaded, and I put it on my desk. Then I set back down and got me a glass outta the drawer and poured me a good drink a’ whiskey. I drunk it all down almost at one gulp. Then I poured another one.
I was about halfway through that second drink when ole Sly come a-walking in. “What is it, Barjack?” he said.
“Did Happy fetch you?” I said.
“Yes, he did.”
“Did he tell you what happened to ole Butcher?”
“He said that Butcher got knocked on the head pretty bad.”
“That’s right. Just down the street here and in the middle a’ the goddamn day. It was most likely that son of a bitch Cody. I want you to walk down there with me and check it out.”
“All right,” he said.
I stood up and finished off my drink. Then I put my Merwin and Hulbert back into my holster and picked up the shotgun. I headed for the door, but Sly had beat me to it. He opened it up and stepped aside for me. I went out and he followed and closed the door. Then we walked side by side down the street to the spot what Butcher had told me about. I seed a little blood on the sidewalk, I reckoned where ole Butcher had fell down. Poking the shotgun in ahead a’ me, I stepped into the dark space. Sly follered me with a Colt in his hand. I squinnied my eyeballs at the dark, but I never seed no one in there.
Then at the far end a’ the space there right by the alley, a figger in a long black coat stepped out into the space just long enough to hurry around the corner and disappear. Before I had time to think about it, I raised up the shotgun and fired off a blast. I felt like a damned greenhorn, wasting a shot like that. “Damn it,” I said.
Sly squeezed past me and went to running after the bastard. I tuck out after him. He was around the corner in a hurry. It tuck me a little longer, but whenever I come out in the alley, I seed Sly down a couple a’ buildings and rounding another corner. I went after him as fast as I could, but my old legs just wouldn’t work none too good no more. I heared a shot. When I final went around that corner, Sly was a-standing there with his Colt in his hand.
“Did you get him?” I said.
“I don’t think so,” he said. “I think I hit the long tail of that cloak he’s wearing.”
“Where’d he go?” I ast.
“Barjack,” Sly said, “you’re not likely to believe this, but when I shot, it was almost like he just disappeared. I have no idea which way he turned.”
“I believe it,” I said. “I been hearing stories like that for two weeks now. Well, let’s walk over there and take a look.”
We walked down to the end a’ the building, what was the front, and we was back out on the main street. We looked both ways, and we didn’t see no one what looked nothing like Cody, but Sly leaned over to pick up a black cloak. He helt it up by one a’ the corners, and I seed his bullet hole.
“No way that hit him,” he said.
“Where the hell could he a’ gone?” I said out loud but not really asking Sly, just talking.
We was a-standing in front a’ the big winder at the front a’ Augie the saddle maker’s shop. Augie was inside a-working on a set a’ harness. Sly opened the door and stepped inside. Holding up the long black cloak, he said, “Did you see the man that dropped this?”
“Yeah,” Augie said.
“Which way did he go?”
“He looked to me like he was headed for the Hooch House,” Augie said.
“Let’s go,” I said, and me and Sly moved on down the sidewalk. Back behint us I heared Augie call out, “Say, Marshal, what’d he do?”
As we was a-moving along, I seed Happy and Dingle acrost the street, and up ahead of us I seed the Churkee and Polly moving in the opposite direction from us a-headed for the Hooch House too. They was a whole bunch a’ folks out on the sidewalk and in the street, and to this day I don’t know how come, but the street was sure enough crowded that day, I can tell you that. Then all of a suddenlike, we all heared a booming and fearful-sounding voice come down like from the clouds.
I reckon all of us in town went and looked up to see if we could see God’s face in the sky, but what we did see was Cody hisself. He was standing on the peak a’ the bank’s facade. It were the highest place he could get on main street. He was holding a six gun in each hand, and of a sudden, he went to shooting. He dropped a cowboy in the middle a’ the street. A whole bunch of folks went diving for cover. One man went headlong into a watering trough, and he went clean under the water. I don’t know how he was a-breathing. I yelled out in general, “Get the son of a bitch.”
It seemed like ever’one on the street went to shooting, me included, and I could see the bullets a-hitting in that facade, kicking up splinters around Cody’s feet, but it didn’t seem like none of them ever did hit him. Then there come so many bullets around him that I couldn’t see how some of them didn’t get him, and maybe some did, on account a’ he yelled out loud like a stuck pig, and you could hear him yell over the noise of all them shots, and he fell over back’ards, and I heared a loud crash.
“Surround the bank,” I called out, and men with guns went to running toward the bank, some to the sides and some around to the back side. I went to the back. “Anyone see him come down off a’ there?” I ast.
“Nope,” said one a’ the men back there.
“How the hell’d he get his ass up there?” I ast.
Happy was over to my left near the corner a’ the building, and he said, “There’s a ladder over on this side, Barjack.”
“Well, climb your ass up there and take a look,” I said, “but be careful when you get to the top that he don’t plug you in the head.”
“Yes, sir,” Happy said, and he went around the corner. I follered to watch him. I was a-thinking as he started up that there ladder what a fool thing that was to do. If someone had tole me to do that, I’da tole him to go suck on a raw egg, a buzzard’s egg for that, but ole Happy, he always done what I tole him to do. He was a good kid and a damn good depitty. He was about halfway up that long ladder, and I had my shooter out and was a-watching that roof for any sign a’ Cody. I never seed none.
Happy got up where he could peek over the roof, and he called down, “He ain’t up here, Barjack.”
“He’s got to be up there, the son of a bitch,” I yelled.
“Well, he ain’t.” Ole Happy went on up over the edge, and he walked out onto the roof, where I lost sight of him. Ever’ one waited real anxious. Then Happy called out again. “Barjack,” he said, “there’s a big hole in the roof.”
“What?”
“There’s a big hole in the roof. You know, when we seed him fall and we heared that crash? Well, I think he fell right through the roof.”
“Well, I be goddamned,” I said. “You stay where you’re at, Happy, and the rest a’ you stay where you are too. I started around the building, and I picked up Butcher on the side. Out front I found Sly, and I tuck them two with me into the bank by way a’ the front door. Ever’thing looked normal. One a’ the tellers seed me, and he come walking over to me.
“Can I help you, Marshal?” he ast me.
I was a-looking up at the ceiling, but I never seed no hole. “Yeah,” I said, “I want you to take me into ever’room in this here building.”
“Now?”
“Right now, goddamn it.”
Well, he did. He tuck me into the president’s office and the back room and ever’where, and I looked up at the ceiling in all a’ them places. There wasn’t no hole. I grumbled and went outside. I walked around to the ladder and climbed up and onto the damned roof. My idea was to throw Happy off, but instead I walked over to the peak a’ the facade, and by God, there was the hole in the roof right where Happy had said it was. I pushed back my hat to scratch my head. This was a puzzle.
“Happy,” I said, “I come up here to throw you off the roof for lying to me, but you ain’t lied. There it is, by God.”
He give me a kinda stupid look, like he didn’t have no idea what the hell I was a-talking about, and I reckon he didn’t neither, so I tole him. “I went all through that bank, ever’room, and there ain’t no hole nowhere inside.”
“Then he’s in there,” Happy said.
“In where?”
“He’s between the roof and the ceiling,” Happy said. “He’s got to be.”
“By God, you’re right,” I said. I walked over to the edge and hollered at Butcher and Sly to come on up. They did, but so did Miller and Polly. I showed them the hole, and I told them what I had found inside the bank and what Happy had said. “So now, what do we do?”
Butcher said, “Well, we could stay up here and all around the bank till he starves to death.”
“I ain’t so sure I want to hang around on the roof here for that long,” I said.
“One or two of us could go down that hole and look for him,” said Miller.
“The problem with that is that soon as you showed your ass down that hole, Cody’d be apt to blast it,” I said.
“Let’s get everyone out of the bank,” said Sly. “Then we’ll walk over this whole roof and shoot down into it. One of us is bound to get him.”
“That’s a good idee,” I said, and I sent Happy down to clear the bank out. He was back real soon and said it was did, and so we all pulled out our guns and went to shooting down. We walked all over that roof and peppered it with bullets. There wasn’t no way nobody coulda lived through that.
“Happy,” I said, “go down in there now.”
“Yes, sir,” he said, and he walked over to the hole in the roof and eased himself down into it. Butcher come along behind him and said, “Me too,” and he follered Happy right down into that there potential trap. I kept waiting to hear a gunshot, but I never. Happy come a-crawling back over to the hole, and he looked up. “Barjack,” he said, “you got any matches?”
“What for?” I said.
“It’s dark in here.”
I reached into my pocket and pulled out a few and dropped them down into his hat, and he crawled off somewhere again. By an’ by, he come back, Butcher with him, and they come up outta the hole. Both of them was shaking they heads.
“He ain’t there,” said Happy.
“Nowhere,” said Butcher.
“You come across any blood?” I ast.
“No, sir,” said Happy, and Butcher was shaking his head.
I looked at Sly. “This don’t make a bit a’ sense,” I said. “Not a goddamn bit.”
“Maybe he’s a ghost,” Polly said. I wanted to say that was about a stupid thing to say, but before I could say it, I caught myself thinking that maybe she was right, maybe we had done kilt him, and he was a-haunting us for it. The way things had been going, that was about the only thing that made any sense atall. He was a goddamned ghost.
“No,” said Miller, “I don’t think so.”
“No?” said Polly. “How come?”
“Well, for starters,” he said, “a ghost would have just slid right through that roof. It wouldn’t have crashed through like that.”
“What do you mean?” she said.
“A ghost can walk right through a brick wall without even displacing one brick,” he said.
“How the hell do you know that? Have you ever seen a goddamn ghost?”
Chapter Twenty
Well, now, I kinda thunk that Miller was right in what he said about ghosts, but then what Polly said kinda set me to thinking that she might be right too. Hell, I hadn’t never seed no ghost. I couldn’t rightly say that he could go through a wall or a ceiling or whatever without smashing it. Miller said he wouldn’t smash it, but damned if I knowed the truth a’ the matter. For all that, hell, I didn’t even know if there was any such thing as a goddamn ghost, and I sure as hell didn’t want to find out for certain.
“I know, Barjack,” said Happy.
“Aw,” I said, “what the hell do you know?”
“Whenever he fell through the rooftop,
he was alive, so he crashed through it, but then he died, and so he just slud through the ceiling without crashing it or nothing. Or maybe he slud back through the roof. Why, hellfire, if he’s a ghost he might could be standing right here amongst us right now, and we not even know it on account a’ we can’t see a ghost.”
“All right, smart-ass,” I said, “what the hell kilt him after he went and crashed through the roof? Landing on the upper side a’ the ceiling?”
“Well, maybe one of us shot him.”
I couldn’t answer that one. Maybe we had shot the son of a bitch and kilt him. We damn sure ventilated that rooftop a-trying. I sure didn’t have no other explanation for his damned disappearing thattaway. But I still never wanted to believe we was a-dealing with a dead ghost now.
“Let’s get down off a’ this son of a bitch,” I said.
We all of us clumb on back down, and I went back inside a’ the bank, and ever’one follered me in there. We walked all through that damned bank, ever’ room in the whole building including the pre-sidunt’s office. There wasn’t no sign that ole Cody nor any other stranger had been in there atall, and they damn sure weren’t no holes in the damned ceiling nowhere. I told Happy to stay in the bank just in case anything was to happen there, and I tole Butcher to go back up on the roof and keep his eyes open wide. I headed back for the Hooch House, and Miller and ole Sly walked along with me. I don’t know what the rest of them did.
We was about to go inside whenever we heared a shot, and it sounded like as if it had come from the bank, where we had just come from. “The bank, Barjack,” said Sly, and we all of us turned around to run back there, and whenever we turned, we seed that son of a bitch in his long-tailed black coat a-running down the street with a gun still in his hand. He went around the first corner he come to. We went hauling ass after him.
Barjack and the Unwelcome Ghost Page 15