The Tangled Web
Page 20
Hiya! :)
I’m not blogging this because it’s too risky at the moment. I’ll blog it when I come back. You’ll never guess what happened over the last week. Amy (Flic’s ex BFF) emailed HunE-trap Investigations asking if our team could go out and trap Flic’s ex-husband, George in Cyprus!
Well, obviously the boys didn’t want to do it. And they were a bit pissed off that we had taken the original assignment on. But Flic and I quit HunE-trap Investigations. Then we phoned Amy saying we’d do it independently and visited Lumi (Big Issue girl) who it turns out is the one who’s shacked up with Magnus and asked her to come with us! The three of us are going to Cyprus!
Vicky
xx
*****
To: vicky@silverthistle.co.uk
From: christospolycarpou@aphroditesbouquet.co.uk
Subject: Re: Cyprus Baby!
Date: 4th July
Hi agapi mou :)
Whoa, whoa, whoa! What? Slow down Blondie. Lumi’s shacked up with Magnus? When did this happen? When are you in Cyprus? At the same time as me? We could meet. If you want to, that is.
Flic’s last name used to be Goodbody??? I’d have kept that after the divorce. But that’s just me.
Glad you’ve finally given up that HunE-trap nonsense. No good will ever come of it!
This is random, but have you heard from Colin recently? Do you think you and he would get back together if he came back to Scotland?
Christos
xx
*****
To: christospolycarpou@aphroditesbouquet.co.uk
From: vicky@silverthistle.co.uk
Subject: Re: Re: Cyprus Baby!
Date: 4th July
Lumi and Magnus have been together for months apparently. Who knew?!? Well, Flic did.
As for Colin, no, I haven’t heard from him. I have no idea where he is now. It would probably depend on his feelings. I never actually wanted to break up. It was a stupid fight and I acted on impulse when I ended it.
Yes, I’ll be in Cyprus at the same time as you! We should definitely meet up over there! I’m leaving a week on Sunday.
Vicky
xx
*****
To: vicky@silverthistle.co.uk
From: christospolycarpou@aphroditesbouquet.co.uk
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Cyprus Baby!
Date: 4th July
I’m really glad that we will be in Cyprus at the same time. We can spend some time together properly. And I’ll be able to hug you without worrying someone we know will see us and interpret it wrongly. We should meet somewhere special, that we’ll always remember. We can talk about it once you’re over there.
BTW, Pamela’s honey has stopped trying to seduce me all of a sudden. Should I be worried?
Christos
xx
*****
To: christospolycarpou@aphroditesbouquet.com
From: vicky@silverthistle.co.uk
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Cyprus Baby!
Date: 30th June
I agree, somewhere beautiful and peaceful where we can have a proper chat and won’t be disturbed :)
No, I wouldn’t worry. She’s just finished school. Exams are over. She’s probably enjoying her social life.
Vicky
xx
26
14th July
‘Do you think they’ll do cocktails on the plane?’ Flic asked.
‘Probably not, but you could always buy some miniatures and make one up yourself,’ Vicky suggested.
Almost two weeks had passed since they officially quit HunE-trap Investigations and they accepted their first and last independent, real life investigation. Nerves seemed to be getting the better of Flic. She had been talking about alcohol all day – something Vicky had learned Flic did when she was struggling to cope. She hadn’t had any alcohol yet, but Vicky guessed that was because she had nothing but Euros in her purse and the local Oddbins only accepted Sterling.
Vicky checked the contents of her suitcase one last time and then sat on it, reaching round for the zip. It was a short trip so she was only taking a small case, just big enough for some dresses, underwear, a couple of pairs of shoes, a bikini, her toilet bag and her straighteners. If she needed anything else, she would buy it over there.
She peered over at Flic’s gigantic case which would have lasted her a fortnight or more. She could have guessed Flic wouldn’t be the type to travel light, but she had a hard time figuring out exactly what was in the case that was absolutely essential for a two night trip.
‘This is a hell of a long way to go for two nights. Why couldn’t he just have gone to Ibiza or somewhere closer?’ Flic hissed.
‘I’m glad he didn’t. Christos isn’t in Ibiza,’ Vicky grinned.
‘Just be careful there. I know he’s sweet and friendly and all that, but remember he has a psycho girlfriend and twelve kids,’ Flic warned.
‘Thirteen kids actually,’ Vicky jokingly corrected her, although the truth was he only had five. ‘I’m not stupid. I don’t want anything to happen between the two of us. I wouldn’t let it. We’re just mates.’
Vicky turned away from Flic as she spoke to avoid eye contact, knowing that Flic was right to be warning her off Christos. The words coming out of her own mouth were exactly what she should be thinking and feeling, but a little voice inside her was screaming, “Why can’t things be different?”
‘At least we won’t have any of this grotty weather in Cyprus,’ Flic chuckled.
They both turned to look outside and saw the rain battering against the window pane. Vicky smiled. This was going to be the first time she had been abroad since before Sasha was born - and the first time she had been abroad without her ex boyfriend in her adult life. She had felt twinges of guilt all day about leaving her daughter, but her parents had arranged to take Sasha to Edinburgh with them for a weekend anyway. Even if she hadn’t decided to go to Cyprus, she and Sasha would still have been apart.
‘Look! There’s Lumi coming,’ Flic announced, pointing her finger at the window.
Vicky thought that she had been travelling light compared to Flic, but Lumi made her own modest little suitcase seem diva-esque. All she carried was a large black handbag. It was highly unlikely she had everything she would need for the trip in that bag.
‘Where’s her suitcase?’ Vicky asked.
‘Something’s wrong. Look at her face, it’s all twisted,’ Flic worried.
Vicky had only been thinking about the lack of luggage before Flic had drawn attention to Lumi’s expression. Her eyes were scrunched tightly and her lips were pressed into a thin line. Everything about her body language made her look sad, from the way her shoulders were hunched, to the way she hugged her arms around her chest and the fact that her jacket had a hood but she’d neglected to protect her head from the rain.
‘I knew things were going too well,’ Vicky snorted. She shook her head in frustration. Why did nothing ever go smoothly for her? A moment of panic made her wonder if she now wasn’t going to make it to Cyprus. But she reminded herself that she could still go, even if Lumi didn’t. She’d just need to work out a plan B for trapping George.
Flic rushed to her front door and threw it open in preparation for Lumi’s arrival. Vicky followed Flic, deliberately walking slower than Flic had so that she didn’t have to look too eager to see the unlikely temptress who had stolen her man.
Lumi reached the door. It was obvious that her face was wet with tears as well as rain. The whites of her eyes had turned red. She had been crying for quite some time.
‘Are you ok? What’s happened?’ Flic quickly switched on her big sister mode.
Lumi shook her head and sobbed harder. Vicky fought back a wave of sympathy. Why should she feel sorry for her just because she was crying?
‘Here, take off your wet clothes. You’re soaked through. I’ve got plenty of clean clothes you can borrow. Right, in the shower you go. Warm yourself up,’ Flic instructed and ushered Lumi into the bathroo
m.
Vicky looked around herself awkwardly, feeling like a spare part. She decided to put the kettle on and check her Tête-a-net news feed to fill in the time while Lumi showered and Flic got spare clothes organised. She began to pour water from the tap into the kettle as she read the comments on an update she had written that morning, but the water overflowed as she read the conversation that had taken place.
Victoria Robertson is leaving on a jet plane! :) 09:31 on 14th July
The Pink Cougar at 10:01 on 14th July
Me too!!! :))))))))) I saw u changed your relationship status from seeing someone to single :( Don’t worry, this weekend is going to be FAB, I guarantee it! And I am on a mission to get you high on hugs! X
Magnus Pellicci at 10:20 on 14th July
It’s about time you changed it.
Adam Robertson at 10:22 on 14th July
Have fun sis xx
Christos Polycarpou at 10:43 on 14th July
Text me to let me know that you’ve arrived. Saturday can’t come quick enough ;)
Wee Mela at 10: 44 on 14th July
Why can’t Saturday come quick enough? What’s happening?
Magnus Pellicci at 11:31 on 14th July
They’re probably meeting up at a nightclub or something. All she ever did when we were seeing each other was text him.
Adam Robertson at 11:35 on 14th July
Don’t think so mate, Vicky’s going to Ibiza. Christos is in Cyprus.
Scarlett McDonald at 11:37 on 14th July
No, she’s going to Cyprus.
Adam Robertson at 11:42 on 14th July
No, it’s definitely Ibiza
Magnus Pellicci at 11:44 on 14th July
Cyprus? Wasn’t that where that Amy Goodbody wanted them to go?
Adam Robertson at 11:45 on 14th July
Yeah. But she definitely said Ibiza. I gave her a list of nightclubs to go to in San Antonio.
Scarlett McDonald at 11:46 on 14th July
Why do you always have to contradict everything I say? IT’S DEFO CYPRUS.
Adam Robertson at 11:50 on 14th July
Drop it Scarlett. Don’t you have to double check all the lies you’ve told so you don’t slip up on TV tomorrow? Roland Reading hates liars!
Magnus Pellicci at 11:52 on 14th July
Vicky, if you read this before you leave and you’re flying out from Glasgow, can you give Diana a lift to the airport please? She’s going home to Poland for a few days and travelling from Glasgow tomorrow morning.
Wee Mela at 11:53 on 14th July
You’ve got a bit of a cheek asking her that!
Betty Rice at 11:55 on 14th July
Have a lovely time girls x
Betty Rice at 11:56 on 14th July
Tell Flic to bring her old granny home a hot Cypriot pensioner x
Ruth Watt at 11:59 on 14th July
How come you’ve got the money to go on holiday, yet you have still not replaced the Bag For Life you stole from me at New Year? Hmmm?
Scarlett McDonald at 12:00 on 14th July
Vicky’s actually not supposed to be going anywhere. She phoned our boss earlier to tell him she won’t be at work until at least Tuesday because she’s sick as a dog! She needs to remove this from Tête-a-net before word gets around!
Wee Mela at 12:02 on 14th July
Haha, liar liar pants on fire!
Adam Robertson at 12:14 on 14th July
They’re not going to Cyprus Betty, they’re going to Ibiza x
Wee Mela at 12:15 on 14th July
Now I have a cheesy Vengaboys song stuck in my head. Maybe I could write a Vengaboys tribute musical next???!!!???
Adam Robertson at 12:22 on 14th July
I’d stick with Chaka Demus and Pliers, Pamela
Magnus Pellicci at 12:32 on 14th July
Will someone please explain to me why everyone thinks they’re going to Cyprus except me and Adam?
Adam Robertson at 12:35 on 14th July
They wouldn’t have accepted that job and not told us, would they?
Maria Robertson at 12:52 on 14th July
Wow! I LOVE Tête-a-net! Reading other people’s updates and conversations is almost as good as Eastenders! Especially when it looks like there’s lies and deceit. Love it!
Bob Robertson at 12:55 on 14th July
I know! I’m half expecting one of the Mitchell brothers to leave a comment next.
Maria Robertson at 12:56 on 14th July
Or Maybe Peggy!
Bob Robertson at 12:59 on 14th July
Or Maybe it’ll be Tiffany!
Maria Robertson at 13:01 on 14th July
Now that really would be something, seeing as she’s dead lol
Bob Robertson at 13:02 on 14th July
Spooky! Social networking from beyond the grave! Lol, you can tell I haven’t watched it for years!
Magnus Pellicci at 13:02 on 14th July
Hey, what do you mean by this is almost as good as Eastenders?
Bob Robertson at 13:05 on 14th July
Maggie, I was comparing the goings on in this comment thread alone to the popular long-running British soap opera! :)
Wee Mela at 13:06 on 14th July
This is getting ridiculous! Why can’t you just talk to each other like normal parents? Get a life! Go and enjoy Edinburgh :P
Adam Robertson at 20:01 on 14th July
Hey Mags… You’re wrong, they ARE going to Cyprus, I just checked THE DRAWER. She stuffed a copy of the flight confirmation printout in there.
Wee Mela at 20:08 on 14th July
Ha ha… they’re going to do that job you two turned down :P Don’t bully Vicky and Flic into doing what you two want cos they will just go ahead and do their own thing anyway
Magnus Pellicci at 20:20 on 14th July
They can do what they fucking want. I’m done with women altogether. Liars, the lot of them.
Wee Mela at 20:21 on 14th July
Shhhht! You’re one to talk Maggie
Adam Robertson at 20:24 on 14th July
What do you mean Mags?
Magnus Pellicci at 20:31 on 14th July
I fancied a quick look at Diana’s passport to see what stamps she had. Boy, did I get a shock!
Adam Robertson at 20:35 on 14th July
Oh yeah? What did you see?
Wee Mela at 20:37 on 14th July
Don’t mess with Vicky especially cos she drives around in big black cars with dead people in the back. She’s a psycho!
Adam Robertson at 20:40 on 14th July
@Mags I’m on my way round to your house
Wee Mela at 20:41 on 14th July
Hey, Maggie, what’s up? Your new girlyfriend a drug smuggler or something? I knew the cupcake thing was just a plan to drug all the men in Inverness so that she could have her evil way with them and steal them away from their girlfriends and wives! Mwahahahaha. Go get a set of balls :P
Ruth Watt at 20:53 on 14th July
What’s wrong Maggie? Off buying yourself some balls?
Scarlett McDonald at 20:55 on 14th July
Oh no! This is really getting out of hand now!
Magnus Pellicci at 20:56 on 14th July
Hey Ruth baby, I don’t believe we’ve met!
Ruth Watt at 20:58 on 14th July
As much as I enjoy being sexually harassed by foreign men via the Internet, I’m afraid you’ll have to direct your attentions elsewhere. I’m gay for Wee Mela.
Wee Mela at 20:59 on 14th July
Yeah, so fuck off mate!
Ozgur Durmaz at 20:59 on 14th July
Does anybody here want a Magnum??? ;)
Wee Mela at 21:00 on 14th July
WTF? Who asked you to butt in Ozgur? Jeez, my sister knows some proper weirdos :/
Magnus Pellicci at 21:16 on 14th July
Ruth, I know for a fact Pamela is not a lesbian. I just thought I’d be friendly and introduce myself
Wee Mela at 21:17 on 14th July
&nbs
p; Can you not just dry up or something?
Magnus Pellicci at 21:19 on 14th July
FYI I’m not a foreigner, I’m from Kilmarnock
Wee Mela at 21:20 on 14th July
FAIL! Nobody said you were! We’ve moved on from that! Jeez, you’re about an hour too late!
Bob Robertson at 21:20 on 14th July
Who is Christos Polycarpou? Is he related to the Polycarpou family who run the deli?
Wee Mela at 21:23 on 14th July
I love it when old folk try to join in! It’s so random!
Magnus Pellicci at 21:36 on 14th July
Pamela, why are you so aggressive towards me?
Bob Robertson at 21:37 on 14th July
Who is Christos? Is he the Christos that Vicky always texts?
Magnus Pellicci at 21:28 on 14th July
Yes Bob, it’s the same guy. I’m just trying to be friendly with everyone here but Pamela seems to have an issue with me this evening. I’ll try and resolve it sir.
Wee Mela at 21:29 on 14th July
Friends? Haha, yeah rite! OMG, you are such a creep calling my dad sir!
Magnus Pellicci at 21:31 on 14th July