After the Affair

by Miranda Lee

  Cassie had, however, confessed reluctantly to her mother that Dan had asked her to marry him, not adding that she had already been emotionally blackmailed into saying 'yes'. She had let her mother think that the matter was yet to be decided. And, as far as Cassie was concerned in the cold light of day, that was so!

  Joan had been astonished, then delighted, expressing the opinion that she was sure it would be for the best. 'After all, you've never really got over the man, have you?' she'd said perceptively. 'And I'm sure he must still care for you if he wants to marry you. Men these days don't marry merely because of an illegitimate child.'

  Cassie did not have the heart to disillusion her. Jason was without doubt Dan's main motive for proposing marriage.

  But he definitely did not care for her any more. He openly disliked the woman she'd become. Though for some perverse reason he still wanted her. His vow to reduce her to some sort of sexual slave was obsessive in its intensity, fuelled perhaps by a desire for revenge. Dan bitterly resented Jason's existence having been kept from him.

  What terrified her most was how easily Dan would achieve his objective if she married him. And he expected her answer that afternoon!

  By the time Cassie climbed into her jeep at the end of the day, she was emotionally exhausted. Quite automatically she turned on to the road for home instead of taking the highway which led to Strath-haven, and was half-way there before she realised her mistake. Shrugging wearily, she continued on, thinking to herself that it was just as well. She really couldn't face Dan looking as she did.

  When she brought the jeep to a halt in front of the old farmhouse, Cassie was about to climb out from behind the wheel when she stopped. Why should she go inside and change? It was better that Dan saw her exactly as she was attired every workday. White overalls, no make-up, hair scraped back into a functional pony-tail. Maybe he would change his mind about marrying her, she thought wryly, if he saw her at her least attractive.

  Cassie restarted the engine and drove down the hill towards the suspension bridge, detouring slightly to skirt Rosie's paddock. No untoward developments there, she thought with relief as she saw the mare actually cantering. Not that there should be. Foals rarely came early, but Rosie was getting on in years, which could make things slightly unpredictable. If anything went wrong at this late stage, Cassie worried...

  I'm getting paranoid, she thought irritably. Rosie's as healthy as a horse! She laughed at her own pun and turned the jeep for the short run down to the river.

  Jason must have been watching for her, for he raced to meet her as she stepped off the bridge, throwing his arms around her waist in an uncharacteristic hug. 'Gee, you're late. We thought you weren't coming. Dan was going to ring up Gran to find out what had happened to you, but I told him you'd make it sooner or later. I said you probably had a 'mergency with a cow or something.'

  Cassie smiled down at her bright-eyed son as he skipped along the gravel path ahead of her, backwards, marvelling at his energy and thinking to herself that his happiness was really worth any sacrifice. But surely he could be happy, she frowned, without his mother making such a disastrous marriage?

  'And guess what?' he was saying. 'I had three rides in the helicopter. But it's gone now, see?' he pointed to the spot on the front lawn where the machine usually stood. 'Dan sent it back to Sydney.'

  Cassie glanced up then, having for some time been half-aware of Dan watching them from the veranda. Perhaps he was ensuring that she made no retreat now that she'd arrived.

  'And which did you enjoy most?' she asked Jason, trying to keep her voice normal as they approached the front steps. "The sports car?' She nodded towards the shining red Mercedes parked nearby. 'Or the helicopter?'

  Jason said, 'The car was terrific, but the helicopter was super!'

  Cassie's head snapped up to see Dan striding down the front steps of the house. Her breath caught in her throat seeing him at such close quarters, his very male frame dressed in blue jeans and a maroon shirt, the casual attire far more reminiscent of the Dan she had first met.

  Made of faded denim, the jeans were tightly fitted, moulding his slim hips and powerful thighs. The long sleeves of the shirt were rolled up, the collar open at the neck. No watch or jewellery adorned his smooth, tanned flesh which drew Cassie's gaze like a magnet. Her insides tightened as she remembered how she used to run her hands over his hairless chest, loving the velvet feel of him.

  Cassie blinked. What had Dan just said? She couldn't think.

  Unnerved, she turned to her son. 'Ready to go home, Jason?' Even as the words popped out of her mouth she knew that she was acting like a fool. Dan would not let her go so easily. But the blistering sexual awareness he always evoked in her made Cassie want to run.

  'Mrs Bertram is making us coffee,' Dan said smoothly. 'We can have it on the veranda and talk while Jason plays with Hugo.'

  The enormous black dog must have heard his name, for he bounded around the corner. Cassie stiffened. 'Are you sure he ‑'

  Her protest was cut off by the sight of her son hugging the slavering Dobermann around the neck. The animal's huge tongue slurped up Jason's face, bringing squeals of objection. 'Oh, yuk! You sloppy old thing. Come on... Let's play fetch.' And the happy pair ran off.

  'Don't concern yourself,' Dan reassured in a soft, kind voice. 'Once Hugo has been introduced to a person as a friend, he is devoted. He would protect Jason with his life now.'

  Cassie could not help being surprised by Dan's pleasant manner. Where was the mocking devil of last night? 'Have...have you had the dog long?' she asked.

  'Five years. Since he was a pup.'

  'He's certainly a beautiful animal.' She kept watching the dog in the distance. It was safer than looking at Dan.

  'He was Roberta's dog.'

  Cassie's heart stopped. 'Roberta?'

  Her eyes turned slowly to see Dan observing her closely. 'My wife,' he said evenly.

  'Oh...' A chill came over Cassie. She didn't want to hear about Dan's wife. She couldn't bear to think that he had belonged to another woman all the time he'd been having an affair with her. A woman he had returned to and stayed with despite his talk about separation and divorce.

  Mrs Betram's arrival with the coffee was timely.

  She was a slim, efficient-looking woman of about fifty. Not a local. Cassie allowed Dan to take her elbow and lead her silently up the steps and over to the table set up on the veranda. The coffee-service was exquisite—made of the finest cream pottery. A selection of delicate pastries rested on a serving plate.

  Mrs Betram smiled at Cassie. 'And you'd be Jason's mother?' the woman asked.

  Dan stepped in and effected a proper introduction. Cassie could not help noticing the woman's open curiosity about her. Or was it astonishment that her boss was interested in such a country bumpkin? She wished now that she had stopped to improve her appearance.

  'That's a lively lad you've got there,' Mrs Betram commented as she poured the coffee.

  Cassie chewed her bottom lip. 'He hasn't been any trouble, has he?'

  'Oh, good heavens, no!'

  'He's had a whale of a time,' Dan added with a laugh. 'But I think Paul was glad to go back to Sydney.'

  'Paul?' Cassie repeated enquiringly.

  'My pilot.' Dan's eyes rested on Cassie in dry amusement. 'You almost met him last night. Thank you, Mrs Bertram, we can manage now. Cream and sugar, Cassie?'

  Cassie was glad of the woman's departure, for a fierce blush was creeping up her neck. How could Dan refer to such an embarrassing encounter so... so casually? It was tactless. And tasteless. And there she'd been thinking he'd turned over a new leaf?

  'Yes, please,' she said stiffly. Then added, 'Mrs Bertram seems a nice person.'

  'She is,' Dan agreed. 'Not that I've known her all that long. She's only been my housekeeper since Roberta died. Prior to that ‑'

  'Do you have to keep referring to your first marriage?' Cassie flared.

  Dan replaced the cream-jug with a sigh
. 'Cassie...I want to explain...about Roberta ‑'

  'But I don't want to hear,' she retorted wildly, knowing she was over-reacting, but finding it impossible to stop. 'I never want to hear about her. Never! Not if you want me to marry you!'

  She raised furious eyes to his, almost daring him to continue, to ruin what he so obviously wanted. He glared back at her, his mouth setting into a thin, angry line.

  'Right,' he bit out, and, with an abrupt movement, stood up and strode inside, returning shortly with a wad of papers and a biro. He pushed the coffee-cups aside and spread the sheets out on the table before her. 'You have to sign here.' He jabbed at some blank spaces on the forms. 'And here. This last one is an authority for my solicitor to pick up a copy of your birth certificate. Marriage licences require paperwork. And a special licence requires even more.'

  She gulped, her earlier anger fading with the growing reality of the situation. This was not the past. This was here and now!

  'We will be married on Sunday,' Dan was saying, 'here, in the garden. I'm flying in a celebrant from Sydney. There will be no guests other than your immediate family. Mine will not be attending. They all live in Perth. Too far to come at short notice. Here...' He picked up the biro and held it out for her.

  Cassie took it with a trembling hand, then stared blankly down at the forms. Dan kept on talking in a rather cold, formal voice. At some stage he had sat down again.

  'I imagine Mrs Bertram will be concerned about her position here when I inform her of our coming marriage. Shall I tell her she can stay, or do you prefer to run the house on your own? It's entirely up to you. Though I do strongly suggest that you consider keeping the staff on. They're reliable and discreet, and you'll need help when we entertain. As well as Mrs Bertram, I have employed a local couple to do all the cleaning and gardening.'

  Cassie sat like a stone. Housekeeper... staff...entertain...

  It suddenly hit her what marriage to this man would entail. She had not even considered his position—that as a successful businessman Dan would lead a full social life. His wife would be expected to play the role of hostess. The prospect was daunting. And rather ironic, with Cassie dressed as she was today. It brought home the folly of going ahead with the idea.

  She lifted panicky eyes. 'Dan, I... Are you absolutely sure you want this...this marriage?'

  His face tightened. 'I thought that that matter was settled,' he stated in clipped tones.

  'Yes...well...I mean...'

  Cassie's stomach was tied up in knots. So, it seemed, was her tongue. She scooped in a calming breath and tried again. 'Look, Dan,' she said in a conciliatory tone, 'I've been thinking. It's still too soon to tell Jason you're his father. Give him a little more time to get to know you...'

  He slanted her a sharp look. 'Bargaining time again, is it? I thought everything was settled last night, Cassie. You agreed to marry me.'

  'But, Dan, I...I hadn't realised what was entailed. I mean...I'm a vet, a simple, no-nonsense country vet. I'm not used to the high life. Dinner-parties and such aren't my style. You must understand that if I married you I would not give up my profession to play a social butterfly.'

  'When you marry me, my dear,' he corrected. 'Not if.' He gave her the oddest look. It was almost warm. 'I don't mind if you work after we're married. Be assured, I bought this place so that I can live a quieter existence. I may have to fly away on business sometimes, and no doubt I'll invite the occasional couple up for the weekend, but other than that I want to be a simple family man. Speaking of which, will you still want to work after you fall pregnant?'

  'Pregnant?'

  'I want us to have more children, Cassie. You must agree that Jason deserves a brother or a sister. You were the one who said you wanted him to have a normal family life.'

  Cassie stared at Dan, an appalling thought catapulting into her brain. If she had not stopped him last night she might have already conceived a baby.

  One hand fluttered up to her temple. The blood was pounding horribly in her head. She felt dazed. And ill. It felt like a ghastly replay of the past.

  'This is all too fast for me,' she rasped. 'Please, Dan, give me more time.' She lifted beseeching eyes to him.

  His face grew cold. 'More time for what? To run away? To thwart me further? You've already deprived me of eight years of my son's life. I have no intention of risking any more.'

  'I won't run away,' she assured him desperately. 'But you can't expect me to marry you and have a baby just like that. I have other responsibilities, other obligations.'

  'Such as?'

  'My mother ‑'

  'Your mother is getting married in less than a fortnight,' Dan interrupted bluntly. 'To dear Roger, no less.'

  Cassie's mouth fell open.

  'Jason is very talkative,' Dan explained drily. 'He told me all about his Gran and your boss. Since even I don't believe that you would be double-crossing your mother with a man of nearly sixty, I can only assume that you lied to me last night. Why, Cassie? Why did you want me to think your boss was your lover?'

  Cassie looked away from his probing eyes and said nothing.

  'Who are you sleeping with that you have to have a cover for him? Is he married? Is that it?'

  Hurt eyes sliced back to him. 'I've only ever slept with one married man, Dan McKay, and that was in ignorance. I don't happen to have a lover...at the moment,' she added when she saw a triumphant light flash into Dan's eyes.

  He totally ignored her last words. 'So... You weren't on your way to a romantic rendezvous last night. Then the red dress was for me, after all, wasn't it?'

  Cassie panicked at the smug way Dan was looking at her. 'Of course.' Her sarcastic tone brought a wariness to his eyes. 'But don't flatter "yourself. I came down to Strath-haven last night planning to seduce you.'

  'You what!'

  'You heard me. I was going to use your...your lust for me to get you to do what I wanted. But I couldn't go through with it. Even with my son's happiness at stake, I couldn't sink as low as that!'

  Silence descended on the pair of them. As the fires of temper cooled Cassie began to regret her nasty words. What was to be gained by these continual slanging matches? It was better that she try to bring some civility at least into their relationship.

  She sighed. 'I'm sorry, Dan. I...I shouldn't have said that.'

  'Why not...? If it's true.' His voice was bitter.

  She gave him a truly apologetic look. 'If you insist on going through with this marriage, then I think we should try to be friends. How can Jason be happy with parents who are always fighting?'

  That undermining warmth crept back into Dan's gaze. 'I don't want to fight with you, Cassie,' he said softly. 'I've never wanted to...'

  Cassie struggled to stay unaffected. Dan was looking at her as though he almost loved her, and it was hard, so hard not to respond. She reminded herself that he was clever at doing that—projecting something that wasn't real. He simply wanted her co-operation, and he meant to get it one way or another.

  'Sign, Cassie,' he urged.

  Her gaze dropped to the forms. She felt like she was on a roller-coaster ride, being swept along with no control, no real say. If she signed, she would be signing her life away, putting her future happiness into Dan's hands in more ways than one. She hesitated, her heart pounding, her head whirling.

  'Sign!'

  She glanced up into his stubborn face again, knowing that it was useless to appeal to him. She was trapped, as much by her own dark desires as anything.

  She signed.

  The biro dropped from nerveless fingers to clatter on to the table.

  Dan stood up and began to gather the papers. 'Drink your coffee,' he said in a gentler tone. 'You look pale.'

  The cup rattled in the saucer as she picked it up.

  The brew was rich and hot, but Cassie scarcely noticed. She drank like a robot, all feeling stunned by the enormity of what she had just done.

  'You won't regret it, Cassie,' he reassured her.
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br />   She stared up at him, long and hard. She saw an incredibly handsome man with striking dark eyes and a sensual face; a powerfully built man, with broad shoulders, a flat stomach and long, athletic legs.

  She saw a stranger.

  CHAPTER NINE

  'Darling, you look lovely!'

  Cassie gave her mother a stiff smile before returning to glance in her dressing-table mirror. She fiddled with her hair for the umpteenth time, poking some escaping tendrils up under the wide picture hat. 'I wish I hadn't let you talk me into wearing white,' she frowned. 'Or this hat!'

  'But it suits you! And what's a bride, without a veil or a hat?'

  Cassie glared ruefully at her bridal outfit once more. The dress was made of lace, with a fitted bodice, long sleeves and a straight slim skirt, finishing just below the knee. The silk lining was strapless, Cassie's faintly tanned skin showing through the lace on the shoulders and arms. A hint of cleavage was visible on second glance. Despite the colour, the gown did not exude a virginal quality.

  Cassie breathed deeply in and out, trying to calm herself. But nothing was going to shift the knots in her stomach. Today was her wedding day. Tonight would be her wedding night...

  'I can't tell you,' her mother was saying, 'how happy I am about this marriage. It's like a miracle. Roger and I can live here on the farm instead of moving into his small unit in town, and you and Jason will be just across the bridge. Speaking of Jason...I'll never forget the look on that boy's face when Dan told him he was his father. Never! It brought tears to my eyes. And if you noticed, Dan was not without a tear himself. One has to give credit where credit is due, Cassie. No matter what the man was like nine years ago, he's different now. You couldn't ask for a more loving and devoted father.'

  Cassie could not agree more. Dan was there every afternoon, picking Jason up from school, keeping him company till Cassie finished work. Jason came home smelling decidedly doggy, but with tales of fun times and computer games, Dan having bought him a whole computer system to make up for eight missed birthdays and Christmases.