Once A Pirate

by Bold, Diana

  “You’re a fool.”

  Daniel’s voice flayed Talon’s already tightly strung nerves to the breaking point. He lifted his head, meeting his brother’s gaze across the narrow room. Shit. The bastard was still awake. “Leave me alone.”

  Daniel pulled himself to a sitting position and gave Talon a slow, appraising look. “Why are you putting yourself through this? You obviously want her. Look at you, standing there with your cock hard as a rock. It would solve all of our problems if you’d just go back in there and let nature take its course.”

  Never in his life had another man commented on the state of his penis. Anger and humiliation surged through him, burning away his lust. He lunged forward, grasping Daniel’s throat and pinning him to the hull. “Give me one more reason,” he whispered. “You don’t know how bad I want to hurt you.”

  Daniel didn’t resist; he merely hung from Talon’s hands, his face turning red with the strain. Disgusted with himself, with the impossibility of the whole situation, Talon released him.

  For a moment, the only sound to be heard was Daniel’s gasping attempts to regain his breath. Talon clenched and unclenched his fists, staring out the small porthole.

  “You’re so predictable.” When Daniel spoke, his voice was choked and low. “Father must be enjoying this immensely. You’re playing right into his hands, and you don’t even realize it.”

  “What the hell are you talking about?” Talon itched to put his hands around his brother’s throat once more, but he restrained himself, determined not to let the bloody bastard make him lose his temper again.

  “My wife is the kind of woman a man like you can’t resist. Innocence is unholy temptation to a man who’s never known it, isn’t it? You already burn for her. It’s just a matter of time.”

  Talon shook his head in disbelief, angry and unwilling to admit the truth. “Why don’t you just do the job yourself, man? Close your eyes and think of England. Christ, do whatever you have to do, just get the bloody thing done and leave me out of it.”

  Daniel gave a bitter laugh. “It’s not that simple. Nothing ever is when my father’s involved.” He met Talon’s furious gaze with a twisted smile. “Enough of this talk about women. I don’t suppose you’ve brought anything to make this trip more bearable? I’ll pay you well.”

  Talon grimaced, realizing his brother was talking about opium, or perhaps something even worse. He had the sallow, wasted look of a man addicted to the stuff. “Looks like I’m not the only one who’s in for a miserable trip.”

  Daniel raised an imaginary glass, smiling for the first time with real humor. “Aren’t you glad your father turned out to be an earl instead of some sailor on shore leave?”

  “Go to hell.” Talon couldn’t help remembering Daniel’s pale little face, peering at him from the top of the stairs on that fateful, long ago day when he’d tried to convince the earl to take him in. Daniel had witnessed his weakest moment, and he doubted he’d ever forgive him for that.

  Daniel sighed and turned away. “I’m already there.”

  * * * * *

  After Talon left, Kathryn climbed beneath the scratchy blankets and snuffed out the light. Her thoughts scattered as she stared up into the darkness. The ship creaked and rocked beneath her, the sounds strange and disconcerting, the swaying motion renewing her nausea.

  How would she bear three more weeks of this?

  Despair settled around her like a black cloud. The events of the past few days had destroyed her optimism, and she didn’t know how to get it back again. The pale, beaten creature she’d become didn’t even resemble the strong, confident woman who’d been so sure she could seduce her husband and control her own destiny just a few short days ago.

  Her life was spinning out of control, and she had no idea how to stop it. No matter how she turned the situation around in her mind, there was no way out. The ship had already sailed. There was no turning back the clock.

  And then there was Talon. Just the thought of him sent that melting sensation spiraling down to the pit of her stomach. She could still feel the heat of his hands on her skin, still taste peppermint and desire on her tongue.

  She’d never wanted anything the way she wanted to give in to this fierce attraction. In his arms, she might be able to forget her heartache. For a few glorious moments, there would be nothing in her world but that beautiful man and the wonderful things he made her feel.

  Unfortunately, she knew she could never live with herself afterwards. The liberties she’d allowed Talon were inexcusable. Under no circumstances could she allow him to touch her again. Her willpower was nonexistent where he was concerned.

  She had to pull herself together and honor the unbreakable vows she’d taken when she’d become Daniel’s wife. He was her cross, and since all her efforts to be free of him had failed, she simply must bear him.

  In a day or two, she’d have to talk to her husband and figure out what their future held. She couldn’t bear the thought of giving birth to his child, not now, after what she’d seen. The best she could hope for was that they’d manage to build some sort of friendship.

  She felt foolish to have ever wished for more.

  Chapter Eleven

  Talon spent the next morning in an out of the way spot on deck. Bare‐chested and indolent, he stretched out next to a pile of rope and soaked up the sunshine. He enjoyed the warmth of the sun, the taste of freedom and the rarity of having nothing to do.

  He’d helped himself to a few volumes from his father’s library before he left, and now he plunged into the world of a novel, seeking an escape from the decisions that lay before him. He had weeks to worry about the future. For the next few days, he planned to do nothing but focus on regaining the health and strength prison had cost him.

  Before his arrest, he’d never had an idle day. As a child, his life had always been a mad scramble to stay alive. Life at sea hadn’t been much better. He’d always been sweating to complete some task or another, even after he’d finally managed to get a ship of his own.

  All his life he’d been rushing toward something, pushing himself harder and harder to achieve some measure of success and security. How humbling to have everything he’d worked for snatched away.

  But it wasn’t his ship or his wealth that he missed the most. It was the feeling of belonging, of having somewhere to call home.

  After a long while, a shadow fell across him. He glanced up, immediately on the defensive since Percy’s crew had made no secret of their reluctance to have their old rival aboard.

  The tow‐headed lad who stood on the deck in front of him took an involuntary step back. “Didn’t mean to disturb you, sir,” he said, his voice cracking. “I was jest wonderin’ what you was readin’.”

  Talon smiled, feeling at ease for the first time in months. “Oh, it’s a fine tale of adventure. Would you like to borrow it when I’m done?”

  The boy cast the book a longing look and then shook his head. “Naw, wouldn’t do me much good. Never did learn to read.”

  Talon frowned. “That’s a pity. What’s your name, boy?”

  The boy grinned and sat down, obviously taking his words as an invitation. “Name’s Johnny, sir. What’s yours?”

  “My name’s Talon Montgomery. But you can call me Hawk, if you like. Most of my friends do.”

  “You’re the pirate,” the boy exclaimed, his eyes widening with fear and fascination. “Everyone’s been sayin’ there’s a pirate named Hawk on the ship.”

  Talon gave a short, humorless laugh. “I once was,” he admitted. “But right now, I’m just another passenger.”

  Johnny reminded Talon of his own cabin boy, Garrett, who had been like a son to him. Garrett’s loss had been the hardest one of all to take, and he was grudgingly thankful his father had stepped in and rescued the lad. He wondered where Garrett was now and hoped he was healthy and happy in his new berth.

  Johnny peered at the book. “Would you tell me this story, Hawk? After you’re done reading it?�
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  “Nope.” Talon shook his head, hiding a smile at the boy’s crestfallen look. “I won’t tell you the story, but I’ll do something even better if you’re interested.”

  Johnny raised one sandy brow in question. “What do you mean, sir?”

  “I can teach you to read, if you want me to.” It would be a way to pass the time. A far more enjoyable activity than being cooped up in his cabin all day with Daniel.

  Johnny’s eyes lit up with wonder, the same way Garrett’s had not so long ago. Hell, the way his had when he’d been taught. “I’d be much obliged, sir. I surely would.”

  Talon laughed. “Meet me here tomorrow after your work is done and we’ll begin.”

  * * * * *

  Kathryn spent the next few days in near total isolation. Talon came faithfully twice a day to bring her something to eat and inquire after her well‐being. But his visits were brief, to say the least, and he avoided meeting her eyes.

  She hadn’t had the pleasure of Daniel’s company and wasn’t desperate enough to seek him out. There were things she needed to discuss with him, important things, but she didn’t have the energy to deal with him at present.

  Her nausea had improved, but she still felt weak and groggy.

  Besides, what good would it do to get out of bed when there was nowhere for her to go except the small adjoining sitting room? She was imprisoned in this tiny cabin as surely as though she had a ball and chain around her ankle.

  On the fourth day of the trip, she woke late in the afternoon, feeling groggy and sick. She pulled herself out of bed to use the chamberpot and then caught sight of herself in the small mirror on her table. Her hair was dull and wild, her face wan and pale, her eyes bruised and teary‐looking.

  She sank into the chair and stared at her reflection in horror. No wonder Talon didn’t want to spend time with her.

  What was she doing to herself? She’d allowed Sutcliffe to beat her.

  Worse, she’d beaten herself by losing her will, losing her way.

  Well, no more. She was through feeling sorry for herself. Filled with new determination, she rooted through her trunk to find a plain, simple skirt and blouse she could don without a maid’s help. Once she was dressed and her hair was neatly combed and plaited, she opened the door that connected her cabin with the sitting room beyond.

  The room was tidy and neat, full of gleaming wood, a small writing desk and a table with two chairs, one of which was occupied by Daniel. Her husband stared morosely into the bottom of his glass, but when she entered, he glanced up.

  Kate took in Daniel’s pale, ravaged face and the wary look in his eyes. He looked as depressed and beaten as she felt.

  “Talon’s not here.” When he spoke, Daniel’s voice was low and rough, as though he hadn’t said a word in several days.

  “I’m not here to see him.” Guilt flooded Kate when she realized her husband was aware of her feelings for his brother. Was she that transparent? “I really think we need to talk, Daniel.”

  He nodded. “Perhaps you’re right. Please, sit down.”

  She took the chair across from him, her stomach churning with anxiety. The next few moments could prove to be pivotal to her future, and she prayed she’d get through them without losing her temper and irrevocably severing the fragile bond that connected them.

  “Are you feeling better?” he asked solicitously. “Talon told me you’d been unwell.”

  “I’m fine.” Heat stained Kate’s cheeks when she thought of Talon witnessing her retch weakly into the chamberpot, of him emptying it for her and then cleaning her up. Even worse was the memory of what had happened later, of Talon’s elegant hands caressing her breasts.

  She forced herself to meet Daniel’s gaze. His light brown hair was disheveled, as though he’d repeatedly run his fingers through it, and there were dark circles under his eyes. “How are you doing, Daniel? You look pale.”

  He gave a deprecating wave of his hand. “I’m fine. Just suffering the aftereffects of whatever my father drugged me with.”

  His words channeled her anger in a new direction. “He’s a monster to do such a thing to his own son. You could have been killed.”

  “I don’t think he gives a damn.” Daniel shrugged and drained his glass. “I haven’t given him the heir he wants, so as far as he’s concerned, I’m utterly useless.”

  Kate shifted in her chair. The image of her husband in his lover’s arms was branded in her mind. “You shouldn’t have married me. You should have known it would only make us both miserable.”

  “Of course, I knew.” Daniel’s voice was low and lost. “But my father pressured me until I couldn’t stand it any more. He knew of my preferences, but he was certain all I needed was the right woman to change my mind.”

  Kate laughed bitterly. “Apparently, I wasn’t the right woman.”

  “It’s not you,” Daniel hastened to assure her. “Believe it or not, I put a lot of thought into choosing you as my wife. You’re beautiful and intelligent, and I really thought I could make it work. I planned to have a child with you, to make you as happy as possible while still maintaining a discreet relationship with Philip. I thought we’d be friends, if nothing else.”

  Kate shuddered at the thought of Daniel going from Philip Carrington’s bed to her own. It would have been even harder to bear his betrayal if she’d thought he’d cared for her, if they’d had a normal marriage.

  She couldn’t even imagine how damaging it would have been to learn his secret if they’d already been intimate and she’d had his child.

  She forced the thought away. “You never even tried to be my friend, Daniel. You’ve ignored me since our wedding day.”

  “I’m sorry.” He pushed out of his chair and knelt before her, taking her hands in his. “Nothing turned out the way I’d planned. I thought about coming to you and confessing everything, but I was sure you’d never forgive me if you knew the truth.”

  His hands were pale and cool, soft to the touch. She couldn’t help comparing them to his brother’s strong, callused ones. And she knew they were both lost, because she could never allow him to touch her the way Talon had, not even if it meant staying banished forever.

  “You should have known I’d come to you eventually, demand more from you than you had to give.”

  He sighed, sounding sad and very young. “I’ve been such a fool. I’ve ruined my life, but the last thing I meant to do was ruin yours as well.”

  She brushed a lock of silky brown hair from his eyes, feeling strangely maternal. He was foolish, he was damned, but she could no longer hold on to her anger.

  Daniel leaned into her touch, seeming to need the human contact as much as she. “What do we do now, Kate? You’re all I have left.”

  It was the first time he’d ever used Talon’s nickname for her, but she didn’t mind. He was absolutely right. For better or for worse, all they had was each other.

  Before she could reply, the door to the passageway opened, and Talon entered the cabin. He froze, his gaze locked with hers. He was shirtless and shoeless, his smooth skin kissed by the sun, stretching tautly over powerfully contoured muscles. Dark hair furred his chest, narrowing to a thin line that disappeared into the waistband of a pair of soft, doeskin breeches.

  He was so beautiful, all lean strength and golden skin. She’d never seen a bare‐chested man before, but doubted many looked like this.

  “How cozy,” he said at last, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “Am I interrupting?”

  His words made Kate feel unaccountably guilty, but quick on the heels of her guilt came anger. How dare he? Talon Montgomery meant nothing to her. Nothing. He was her brother‐in‐law, and she couldn’t let him be anything else.

  Daniel lifted his head and met Talon’s glare straight on. “Bugger off, Talon. My wife and I are finally getting to know each other.”

  Talon frowned and shifted his gaze back to Kate. For a moment, she thought he was going to protest, and she wished with all her foolish h
eart he’d stay.

  “I’m glad to see you’re feeling better,” he said. Then he turned and left the way he’d come.

  Daniel gave a soft laugh and sat back on his heels. “Poor sod. He’s quite smitten with you.”

  Kate’s stomach twisted in panic. Did Daniel know? Was he aware she’d let Talon kiss her twice and touch her in the most intimate way?

  “It’s all right,” Daniel assured her. “I don’t mind if you have an affair. I can’t expect you to remain faithful to me. You’re a young, vibrant woman. You deserve to be loved.”

  “I’m your wife,” she whispered, stung. “I’ll admit I’ve been angry with you and I was tempted to do something spiteful, but it will never happen again. I’ll stand beside you. I swear it.”

  A pained expression crossed his face, and for a moment she was certain her words had upset him, but then he gave her a wry smile. “I’m glad.”

  She did her best to return his smile, but inside her heart was breaking. She knew what she was giving up—Talon and the kind of passion she’d only dreamed about.

  “Well,” he murmured, getting up and grabbing a deck of playing cards from the desk. “Now that everything’s been settled, can I corrupt you further and teach you some card games? I’ve been going out of my mind with boredom.”

  “Yes,” Kate agreed, determined not to dwell on what might have been. “I’d like that very much.”

  Chapter Twelve

  After leaving Daniel and Kate, Talon went back up on deck, his mind whirling with the ramifications of what he’d seen. What the devil was going on? Kate had touched her husband’s face with such tenderness, with the kind of easy familiarity he associated with true love.

  The way he’d imagined she’d touch him if he ever got around to seducing her.

  Talon had never thought of himself as a jealous man. But there was no other word to describe the raw emotion that had exploded in his chest when he’d opened the door and saw his brother and Kate together.