Conspiracy of Silence

by Gledé Browne Kabongo

  “What is it, Eric?”

  “Um… well…”

  The usually articulate and efficient Eric was at a loss for words. That was a sure sign of trouble. “Out with it.”

  “You know how you hate people showing up without an appointment?”

  “You know the drill. Get rid of the person.”

  There was silence on the other end of the line.

  “Was there something else, Eric?”

  “She says if you don’t see her, she’ll cause a scene.”

  “That’s crazy talk. Call security.”

  Nina had no idea who would be crazy enough to pull that stunt but—then it hit her. “Send her in.”

  Nina sat upright and assumed an authoritative posture while her fingers flew over the keyboard of her laptop. She barely looked up when Solange Dupond made her entrance.

  “What’s so important that you’re interrupting my work day?”

  “You are right,” Solange said, taking a seat. “It is important.”

  “Let’s hear it, then.” Nina gave Solange her full attention out of simple courtesy.

  Solange didn’t speak right away. Her eyes wandered attentively around the office. Expensive leather chairs, mahogany bookshelves, and spotless glass front pieces were peppered throughout the ample space, along with paintings that had cost a small fortune. Nina’s favorite thing about her office, however, were the large windows that gave the office a bright, cheery feeling.

  “You have a very important job, oui?”

  “I guess some people would say so. But I bet there’s an insult in there somewhere.”

  “You have accomplished so much in your professional life. You have power, influence, and the respect of your co-workers—because you are so smart, hmm? But you are a failure as a wife.”

  “Your claws are showing. They make you look old.”

  Nina’s play to Solange’s vanity had the desired effect. Solange shot her a look that made Antarctica seem like a tropical destination. She straightened up in the chair and pasted a fake smile.

  “I apologize. I did not come here to insult you, as you say.”

  “Really? Because I had a few more comebacks all ready to go.”

  “I wanted to apologize for my behavior at your in-laws anniversary party.”

  Nina eyed her uninvited guest with apprehension. “Did you get hit in the head on the way over here?”

  “I know it may shock you, but I truly am sorry. I should not have made fun of you. I cannot imagine how difficult it must be to be childless after all this time. It was mean of me to be so inconsiderate. I hope you can forgive me.”

  Nina was bewildered. While the apology seemed heartfelt, she knew Solange couldn’t be trusted. Either she wanted something from Nina or she was getting ready to drop a bombshell. Neither prospect sat well with Nina, who studied Solange for a long moment.

  “You’re trying too hard. What do you have up your sleeve?”

  Solange feigned innocence. “Nothing. I just realized that was no way to behave to the wife of my ex-lover.”

  Nina didn’t like the way Solange lingered on the word lover, as if she wanted to remind Nina that she and Marc had been intimate, something Nina preferred not to think about in the wake of his so-called business relationship with Solange and her company.

  “We don’t like each other. I know why I can’t stand you but I never understood what your issue is with me. You and Marc had long broken up when I started dating him and I’m sure there were other women in between. Why aren’t you mad at them?”

  Solange shifted uncomfortably in her seat and wouldn’t meet Nina’s gaze. She was suddenly fascinated by her orange nail polish, as if the color had magically appeared on her fingers. Nina couldn’t believe she had succeeded in stumping the woman who always knew how to push her buttons.

  “Perhaps he was the one who got away from me. I did not think he would marry someone like you.”

  “Like me?”

  “Someone so ordinary.”

  Who the hell did this woman think she was to barge into her office and tell her she’s ordinary?

  “I suppose you’re extraordinary,” Nina said with an amusement she didn’t feel. “But the problem is, you’re not. There are plenty of women like you who didn’t make the final cut. He picked someone else. Pouting about it years later isn’t going to change anything.”

  “You are so wrong. Don’t keep Marc waiting to become a father. You know how African parents can be so intolerable of daughters-in-law who haven’t produced a baby, especially a son. One day you could be in for a nasty surprise and discover that your husband may be a Papa and you are not the Maman.”

  Nina gripped the edge of her desk, closed her eyes and willed herself to calm down. The fact of the matter was, Solange was right about one thing. Marc was waiting to become a father because of her.

  “I’m shocked that you would even say something like that, Solange. You claim to know Marc so well, yet you think he’s capable of fathering a child outside our marriage?”

  “The past has a funny way of changing the future. Marc could already be a father and not know it.”

  With that, Solange stood up and sashayed her way out of the office, leaving a stunned Nina in her wake.

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  She did it again. Solange had successfully upset Nina’s equilibrium and now she had her wound up so tight she could probably crack a hazelnut with her thoughts. When Nina had told Charlene that Solange implied that Marc might have a love child floating around somewhere, Charlene laughed it off and said Solange was a desperate skank who would do anything to come between Nina and Marc.

  No matter how many times she told herself the Frenchwoman wanted to hurt her, Nina considered the possibility. Marc wouldn’t be the first man to have an affair only to find out years later he’d fathered a child he never knew existed. That is until the mother decided it was time because the financial burden was too much or she was stricken with some terminal illness or for some other reason only the mother would be privy too.

  Nina snapped out of her pity party when she noticed an incoming call from area code 410 on her smartphone. She didn’t let it ring twice. She double-checked her office door to make sure it was locked against colleagues who might decide to just drop by.

  “What did you find out?”

  “Patience, mamacita. You have to buy me dinner first before I show you my goodies.”

  Nina giggled. “I can’t. I’m ravenous. For information, that is.”

  Sonny provided a summary of what he’d discovered so far.

  “I pulled his cell phone records. There are two numbers he calls regularly. One belongs to a Tracey Forbes from Worcester. He also makes regular monthly deposits in the amount of $8,000 to the same account.”

  The pieces of the puzzle were coming together. Eight grand a month for child support made sense since Alexander was attending a private school.

  “What else did you find on Tracey?”

  “She’s twenty-five, a nurse at UMass Medical Center. I’ll send you her address and contact details with the rest of the information.”

  “Who does the other number belong to?”

  “Charlene Hamilton from Quincy, Mass.”

  Nina didn’t move a muscle. Her heart plummeted from her chest into her stomach. She had to rationalize what she just heard. She was sure there was a perfectly reasonable explanation for this. Charlene just hasn’t had a chance to tell her what it was yet. Plus, there was no reason to jump to conclusions.

  “Nina, are you there? Are you all right, mamacita?”

  “Yes. I’m fine.”

  “You know this woman?”

  “She’s my best friend.”

  “I’m sorry. Sounds complicated.”

  “You have no idea.”

  Sonny wasn’t done with her yet, though. “I pulled some of his personal email communications. I’ll send them to you but you’ll need a password to open the file.”

  After
Nina wrote down the password Sonny gave her, she hung up and tried to calm her rioting stomach. She was almost numb with fear about what the email contained. She was beginning to wonder if she’d stumbled upon a hornet’s nest. Within minutes, she checked her phone and saw the email from Sonny in her inbox. She gingerly plugged in the password and waited for the document to launch.

  She walked over to the window and perched herself on the edge. As her eyes skimmed over the words, she suppressed the overwhelming urge to vomit and it had nothing to do with morning sickness. Feelings of hurt and betrayal were invading her being with an intensity she couldn’t control. After a while she stopped reading. The smartphone fell from her hands to the floor and she made no effort to retrieve it. But the phone demanded to be acknowledged as it began ringing, the happy bouncy ringtone mocking her as if it knew how wretched she felt.

  “I just emailed you some photographs,” Sean Merriman said. “I don’t know if they’ll mean anything to you. Let me know if they do and what you want me to do about it.”

  A weak thank you was all Nina could muster. She was sure the photographs would send her over the edge and it was best to ignore it for now.

  * * *

  FORTY-EIGHT HOURS LATER, NINA MADE her way to the building at 50 Memorial Drive in Cambridge, which housed classrooms and offices for MIT’s Sloan School of Management. The building was across the Charles River from Boston and adjacent to Kendall Square.

  He was waiting for her at the podium inside one of the lecture halls with theatre style seating and computers on every desk. There was a vast projector at the front of the room. It looked like he had just wrapped up a lecture for one of his end of summer classes.

  Nina sat in the very first row off to the left. He came down from the podium and sat two seats away from her, which was just as well. She didn’t want to sit too close to him.

  “Thank you for seeing me.”

  “You’re being unnecessarily polite. I guess I should brace myself for the temper tantrum that’s sure to follow. What evil deed am I being accused of now?”

  You need to stop it! Now. I mean it,” Nina pleaded.

  “What do you hope to gain by carrying on with my best friend behind my back?”

  “Oh that,” he said, not bothering to deny it.

  “Yes, that.”

  He got up, adjusted his glasses, and stuck his hands in his pocket as he leaned against the podium. “I suppose it was only a matter of time. How did you find out?”

  “It doesn’t matter. Why are you so obsessed with hurting me?”

  “Why does everything have to be about you? Believe it or not, you’re not the center of my universe. And to be frank, Charlene is a grown woman and shouldn’t have to report to you her every move.”

  “That’s how you justify it?” Nina couldn’t hide her disgust.

  “I don’t have to justify anything to you. Charlene and I have been friends for a long time. When you left for Stanford, she felt alone and abandoned. I helped her through a difficult time and she never forgot it. I don’t expect you to understand that because in your narrow way of looking at the world, everything is either right or wrong, black or white.”

  Nina could feel her anger rising and fought to keep it under control. He had the nerve to stand there and explain it away as if it was totally normal for him to… she couldn’t even bring herself to say the words. She would deal with Charlene and her betrayal later, but right now, she needed to pour Phillip a large dose of reality.

  “You don’t care about Charlene. She’s like a sister to me and you had to taint that relationship, too. You don’t care because you’re incapable of understanding genuine human emotion and bonding, without conditions. And do you know why, Phillip?”

  “Please, tell me. I’ve always wanted to be psychoanalyzed by someone with zero training to do so.”

  “Because you’re a sociopath.”

  The pronouncement hung in the air. Phillip got deathly quiet and Nina needed a moment to catch her breath. She knew he was about to unleash his rage but she didn’t care. Too many people let him get away with too much, including herself. It was time to stand up to the bully.

  “Who the hell do you think you are?” he asked quietly. “What gives you the right to pass judgment on me? You forget that I’m your father and you need to show the proper respect, little girl.”

  His voiced inched up a notch. “I don’t owe you an explanation for what I do and who I do it with. Your friend seemed perfectly content to spend time with me without a single complaint. The fact that she kept it from you is probably because she knows you’re a self-righteous hypocrite.”

  Nina lost all control and began screaming at the top of her lungs, mostly as a release for the agony slicing through her heart. “You’re my father! You’re not supposed to be screwing my best friend. You’ve known her since she was fourteen. You are an unconscionable monster with an ugly contempt for women. You’re not even sorry for what you did to me, your own daughter. I hate you. I really hate you.”

  Nina felt as if she was coming undone, but this was the very first time in her entire life she felt she could tell him exactly what she thought without repercussions, at least not the physical kind. Growing up, she was taught to fear him. She remembered the emotional blackmail he often subjected her to as if it were yesterday. If he was upset about something she did or said, he would shut down, ignore her. That was a feeling worse than death to a young girl who craved her father’s love and approval.

  Phillip was furious. She had no idea what she put him through and didn’t seem to give a damn. Her continued assertion that he was a horrible person and a bad father made him want to throttle her until she took back every word of her ridiculous accusations. She hurt him in a way he’d never allowed another human being to hurt him, and he swore after she left, he never would again. She broke his heart into a million pieces, and yes, maybe he wanted payback.

  “I’ll be the bad guy if it saves you from having to examine your motives. You’re so concerned with the feelings of others, but not once did you give me any consideration when you left home. Not once did you consider the fact that I might be worried about you.

  “Years went by, not a single phone call to say dad I’m alive and okay. I had to hire someone to keep an eye on you when you were in college, to make sure you were safe. You got married and couldn’t be bothered to invite me to your wedding. That was one of the most painful periods of my life. Whatever scraps of information I received after that was because I guilted your sister Cassie into telling me. You unfairly placed the burden of keeping your secret on her. You told your in-laws I had moved away and had no desire to be in contact you, while I lived in the same state, less than an hour away from you. And yes, your leaving really hurt your sister. She worshipped you and didn’t understand why you wouldn’t come home.”

  “You know why I had to…”

  Nina didn’t get to finish the sentence. She felt a sharp pain in her abdomen. She covered her mid-section protectively.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked sharply.

  “Nothing. Just a little—oh, God…”

  She grabbed the edge of the seat to balance herself and struggled to reach for her bag. Phillip walked over from the podium and picked it up.

  “What are you doing?” she said weakly. “I have to call 9-1-1. Something’s wrong with the baby.”

  “Sit tight. I’ll call for help.” He pulled his cell phone from his pocket.

  The pain intensified, a sharp, wrenching pain that felt like her insides were being ripped apart. Nina screamed as she fell to the ground. She curled into the fetal position, holding on to her abdomen. Her screams escalated into primal, gut-wrenching sounds that could probably raise the dead. The last thing she remembered saying was, “Please help me. Please, help my baby.” Then she passed out.

  It looked like he got his wish for revenge. It wasn’t the way he intended for it to happen. When she told him something was wrong with the baby, he wasn’t sure w
hat to think. He knew pregnant women often behaved as if the least little bit of discomfort they felt meant something horrible was about to befall their unborn child.

  When her screams got louder, he realized it was serious. His anger at her over their argument and the ugly things she said to him kept playing in his mind as he watched her writhing in pain on the floor. It was the sight of blood on her skirt that brought his fury to an end. By the time he called for an ambulance, it was too late. His grandchild was gone.

  CHAPTER FOURTEEN

  Old man winter arrived in New England with a roar in early December, burying everything under a foot of snow. Nina wished it had buried her, too. She looked out of her living room window, taking in the picture-perfect image of untainted white powder covering the ground. It was mocking her. She had lost her baby because she was tainted—a tainted liar. Because she wasn’t brave enough to tell the truth, her little boy was gone. Maybe she deserved it. What kind of mother would she have been if she couldn’t teach her child to be courageous? She rubbed her cheeks against the blue customized baby blanket. She was going to bring him home from the hospital wrapped in its soft warmth. Now it was a reminder of the emptiness she felt.

  The doctors told her women her age had a twenty-five to thirty-five percent chance of miscarrying. She was diagnosed with an inevitable miscarriage. The cramping she experienced had been followed by the opening of the cervix. Once that happened, there was no going back. The membranes ruptured and her baby was brutally ripped from her womb and expelled from her body in a flood of blood and tissue. Somehow, she had to find the strength to pick up the pieces and try again.

  “I have something with your name on it. It’s small and shiny.”

  Marc had been trying hard to make her feel better, putting aside his own grief to make sure she was all right. He did everything short of calling in the circus to cheer up his wife, but to no avail.

  Nina slowly moved away from the window. She had an overwhelming urge to crawl back into bed and stay there indefinitely, but she opted for a seat on the sofa. Marc sat beside her.