Broken Kingdom : A bad boy college romance (Royal Hearts Academy Book 4)

by Ashley Jade

  Namely Stone’s.

  “I get that.” A long, weary sigh escapes him. “But other people’s expectations are their problem…not yours.” His eyes meet mine. “You don’t have to live up to what anyone else wants you to be, Bianca. Your life is your path.”

  God, he makes it sound so simple…so effortless.

  “That’s good advice,” I tell him. “You’re pretty smart.”

  He laughs, but there’s no humor. “Trust me, baby girl. I’m not. I’ve just made a lot of mistakes.”

  He’s so young yet it seems like he’s lived a thousand lifetimes.

  And carried the weight of each and every one of them on his shoulders.

  “Oakley?”

  “Yeah?”

  I draw in a breath, hoping like hell he’ll change his mind about us. “Can we—”

  “No.”

  His answer is clipped…resolute.

  Frustration rises up my throat. “Why not?”

  Nothing. Not even so much as a demand that I go away.

  “Whatever,” I mutter as I hike my purse up my shoulder. “I’m not gonna stand here and beg someone to be my friend—”

  My breath catches when he braces his arms on either side of my head, caging me in.

  His voice comes out in a harsh rasp that matches the anger swirling in his blue orbs. “You know I almost killed you, right?”

  I swallow hard as I peer up at him. “Yeah.”

  It’s all I can manage because it’s a struggle to think when he’s this close. My breath comes out choppy as the air around us grows heavy.

  Evidently, he feels whatever’s brewing between us too because his eyes darken as his gaze roams over every inch of my face, soaking me in. “Then why the fuck do you want me in your life?”

  The truth pours out of me.

  “Because I feel something when I’m with you. Something I can’t explain.”

  Something that makes no sense.

  All I know is the heavy feeling of dread in my chest goes away whenever he’s near.

  A shiver breaks free when he drags the tip of his thumb along the scar on my neck. However, it’s the sheer pain filling his eyes that has my heart twisting like someone lodged a dagger into it.

  “You should go back inside.” Mere inches from mine now, his face tenses. “With your fiancé.”

  It’s like being submerged in a vat of ice water.

  “Right.” I duck under his arm. “Have a good night.”

  My hand is on the knob when I blurt out, “Unit one, room 206.”

  “What’s that?”

  “My dorm room.”

  A sharp, irritated noise leaves him. “I’m not changing my mind.”

  Undeterred, I hold his stare. “And I won’t change mine.”

  Because for reasons I can’t explain…

  I need him in my life.

  Chapter 20

  Bianca

  Past…

  I mutter a curse when the windshield wipers turn on. “Shit.”

  I try to turn them off, but that only makes the convertible roof slide up. “Dammit.”

  “What are you doing?”

  My head snaps up at the sound of Oakley’s rough, melodic voice.

  It’s been almost a week since that night and we’ve barely spoken a word to each other.

  He’s also moved back into the guesthouse, so there’s that.

  “What does it look like I’m doing?”

  The lopsided grin plastered on his face makes my insides swoop. “Well, it looks like you’re attempting to drive, but—” Peeking inside my car, he gestures to the button next to my steering wheel. “You’re still in accessory mode…you need to put your foot on the brake and press the button to turn the ignition on.”

  He makes it sound so simple.

  He also makes me feel like an idiot because I don’t know the first thing about driving.

  It just seemed like such a shame to let a nice car rot away in the driveway, so I decided to pay it a little visit today.

  “I knew that,” I insist, trying to hide my embarrassment. “I just didn’t turn the ignition on because I’m never going to drive this thing.”

  Ever.

  His brows furrow. “Right.” He starts to walk away but pauses. “If you ever change your mind and want to take it for a spin, let me know and I’ll go with.”

  Dammit. He can’t put a proposition like that on the table and expect me to turn it down.

  It’s like offering a starving person a six-course meal.

  “For real?” I utter before I can stop myself.

  That lopsided grin is back again. “Yeah.”

  My heart dips when he walks away for a second time.

  “Oakley?”

  He freezes. “What’s up?”

  “I didn’t turn the ignition on because I have no idea what I’m doing.”

  For a moment I think he’s going to laugh or make fun of me like my brothers would, but he doesn’t.

  He ambles back to the car. “Move over.”

  Needless to say, I’m confused.

  “Why?” I question as I scoot to the passenger side.

  He opens the driver’s side door. “Because I’m teaching you how to drive.”

  I should protest and refuse. Remind him that the reason I’m never going to drive is because watching my mother die was the worst thing I’ve ever witnessed in my life and I’m forever paralyzed by anxiety.

  But I can’t.

  Because the thought of spending alone time with Oakley, even just for a little while…is worth trying to conquer my fear.

  My heart is pounding a mile a minute and my palms are so sweaty I can barely grip the steering wheel without them slipping.

  “I can’t do this.”

  This was a horrible idea.

  “Yes, you can,” Oakley assures me. “Take your foot off the brake.”

  “What if I hit something?”

  He looks around the empty parking lot.

  Oakley suggested we come to Ocean Falls—the same place as my cliff incident—since it’s a privately-owned beach and usually empty.

  Turns out he was right, but it does little to ease my dread.

  “The only thing you could possibly hit is sand and water, baby girl.” He holds my gaze. “But you won’t…because you got this.”

  I don’t feel like I got this…not even a little.

  However, I hate appearing weak, especially in front of him.

  “Okay, but if I fuck this up—”

  He squeezes my shoulder, sending a bolt of heat rushing through my shaky limbs. “You won’t.”

  My heart folds in on itself. The way he’s looking at me—as if he actually believes I’m capable of doing this is…

  Everything.

  Heart in my throat, I take my foot off the brake and switch it to the gas pedal.

  “That’s it.”

  Oakley gives me one of his gorgeous smiles. I’m so distracted by the deep dimple peeking out of his right cheek, I almost crash into a trash can.

  However, Oakley’s still grinning, not looking the slightest bit worried about my near fumble. “Give it a little more gas.”

  A thrill surges through me as the car picks up speed. “Holy shit. I’m driving.”

  “Damn right you are.”

  It takes everything in me not to cry, because I’m seriously fucking doing it.

  With shaky fingers, I clutch my necklace.

  If only Liam was here to see me.

  And just like that, my heart is crumbling.

  I slam on the brake, throw the car in park, and get out, fighting back tears.

  Oakley’s hot on my heels. “Whoa. What happened?”

  “He’s not here,” I choke out, gripping my pendant. “He wanted me to conquer my fear so bad…and now that I finally am…he’s not here to witness it.”

  Because he left me.

  Just like she did.

  Oakley’s face falls, but unlike everyone else in my life�
��he doesn’t offer me bullshit words of encouragement or tell me Liam’s watching over me.

  He simply takes my hand. “Come on.”

  The secluded beach isn’t large, but the golden sand along with the giant stones and boulders grazing the shoreline make it a perfect spot to unwind in peace.

  I follow Oakley to an oversized rock and plop down next to him, drawing my knees to my chest.

  The sun is starting to go down, bathing the sky in a pretty pink sunset.

  Seagulls fly endlessly above us, and the crisp smell of the ocean fills my nostrils as I inhale a deep breath.

  “I’m sorry for freaking out,” I whisper because I don’t want him to think I’m not grateful for what he did today.

  He studies my face for what feels like an eternity before pulling a small tin can out of the pocket of his jeans. “There’s plenty of shit people should apologize for in this world…but feelings should never be one of them.”

  I think about this for a moment, and realize he has a point. Everyone is entitled to their feelings…whatever they are.

  Most people would try to change the subject because death—especially suicide—makes them uncomfortable, but Oakley seems perfectly content letting me disclose whatever’s on my mind.

  It’s refreshing.

  “Sometimes I miss him so much it physically hurts.”

  Miss them both.

  Nodding, he brings a joint to his lips and lights it. “I get that.”

  Bringing my head down, I brush my lips against my knee as the scent of marijuana surrounds me like a fog. “Other times I’m so angry—so fucking livid with them for being quitters and abandoning me—I hate them.”

  He takes a deep drag, speaking through a cloud of smoke. “I get that too.”

  It’s only then I realize what I said.

  Them.

  If Oakley caught on to my blunder, he doesn’t press me about it.

  For some strange reason that only makes me want to tell him even more.

  But I don’t…because I can’t.

  I vowed to take her secret to my grave.

  Wordlessly, I seize the joint from him and inhale, letting the smoke infiltrate my lungs.

  A cough escapes me on an exhale, but he doesn’t tease me about it.

  Feeling audacious, I take another puff, my head feeling lighter and my body feeling more relaxed.

  So relaxed I decide to bring up something else that’s been on my mind.

  “Hayley’s been lying to you.”

  I expect him to defend her…just like he always does, but to my astonishment, he doesn’t.

  “I know,” he says softly, prying the joint from me.

  It’s music to my ears…until I see the distraught expression on his face.

  Bringing it to his lips, he takes another deep drag. “I’d say I’m surprised, but I’m not.” He laughs, but there’s no humor. “Every woman I give a shit about ends up betraying me sooner or later.”

  Something sharp squeezes my chest. Oakley isn’t wrong.

  His mother abandoned him.

  Crystal used him.

  And Hayley lied to him.

  “I’ll never do that to you,” I tell him honestly. “You might hate me but—”

  “I don’t hate you,” he says, cutting me off. “You frustrate me. Huge difference.”

  Safe to say his declaration throws me. “I frustrate you?”

  Another nod. “Yup.”

  It’s hard not to feel offended. “Why the hell do I frustrate you?”

  He snuffs out his joint. “We should head back.”

  He starts to move, but I tug on his arm. “Tell me why I frustrate you.”

  He zeroes in on where my hand is locked around his bicep. “Let go.”

  Like hell I will. “Not until you tell me.”

  Those blue eyes pin me with a look so severe it steals my breath. “You know why.”

  With that, he wrenches his arm away and stalks off.

  However, I’m not finished yet.

  Correction, we’re not finished.

  “I frustrate you because you feel something for me,” I call out after him. “Something genuine and raw…and for some reason that scares the hell out of you.”

  But he doesn’t have to be scared…because unlike the rest of the women in his life, I’ll never hurt him.

  I care about him too much.

  He halts in his tracks. “The other night—”

  “Was incredible.”

  I’ve never felt so close to someone—so unguarded and vulnerable—in my whole life.

  I didn’t need to wear a shield or a mask in front of him…because Oakley has a way of seeing right through it.

  He turns to face me. “It was a mistake.”

  It would hurt less if he slapped me.

  My eyes drift to the sand because it tangibly pains me to look at him. “Oh.”

  I feel like a fool. A stupid, helpless, lovesick fool.

  Taking a step forward, he presses a hand to my cheek, then tilts my chin up to look at him. “It was a mistake because I should have known better. I had no business messing—”

  “Why?” My heart beats erratically against my chest, threatening to jump right out into his hands. “Why do you keep insisting we’re wrong when everything in me keeps screaming that it feels right?”

  I’ve never met anyone like Oakley.

  I feel like I can tell him anything in the whole wide world and he’ll never judge me.

  And the safe feeling I get whenever he’s near—the one that tells me he’ll always protect me, no matter how much I may frustrate him—I’ve never felt that with anyone else.

  Just him.

  Only ever him.

  His hold on me tightens. “I know you think you have feelings for me, but it’s only because you’re young and inexperienced. You need to find someone on your playing field, Bianca. A nice, respectable guy who—”

  “I don’t want a nice, respectable guy,” I interject. “I want you.”

  Closing his eyes, he presses his lips to my forehead. “It will pass, baby girl.”

  He makes it seem like my feelings for him are nothing more than a temporary storm cloud.

  But he’s wrong.

  They’re a typhoon.

  One that’s headed straight for him.

  The sound of frantic pounding on my door jolts me out of my sleep.

  Or rather, flashback.

  Groggy, I make my way to the door, debating whether or not I should have grabbed the can of pepper spray Jace and Cole insisted I keep in my drawer.

  Wary, I open the door.

  And freeze.

  Because an out of breath and slightly damp Oakley is standing in front of me.

  “Hi,” I breathe, silently hoping this isn’t a dream or another flashback.

  He braces one arm against the frame, as if steadying himself. “Hi.”

  We stand there for the better part of a minute, staring at each other like a couple of idiots, until finally, he breaks the spell.

  “I’m trying to do the right thing, but you make it fucking impossible.”

  He sounds utterly defeated.

  I’m about to apologize, but I stop myself because I’m not sorry for wanting to be friends with him.

  “Does this mean we can be friends?”

  Blue eyes that seem haunted sharpen on me and he gives me a curt nod. “Yeah.”

  My heart gallops and I can feel the smile stretching across my mouth. “Good.”

  Oakley, however, doesn’t return my delight. “One rule.”

  “What’s that?” I ask cautiously.

  “Don’t ask me to tell you what happened between us in the past.” His thick lashes lower a fraction. “Give me a fresh start, Bianca.”

  My chest caves because the way he says it makes it sound like he’s simultaneously begging for forgiveness and a second chance.

  “Okay,” I whisper.

  I start to smile again, but then it dawns on me. “I n
eed something from you too.”

  “What?”

  I shuffle my feet uncomfortably. I hate asking this, but my life is complicated enough.

  Plus, I want something for myself.

  Something I don’t have to explain or justify to anyone.

  Something that makes me happy.

  “Can we keep our friendship on the down low for a bit since my brothers hate you and I have a…you know.”

  It’s clear he wants to protest, but he must want this friendship as much as I do because he gives me another nod.

  I open the door wider. “Do you want to come in?”

  His eyes drop down and I’m suddenly hyper aware that I’m not wearing a bra under my white tank top.

  The hand clutching the frame tightens as hunger clouds his eyes. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

  “Right.” I take a step back. “Get home safe.”

  He gives me a small grin as he walks away. “Get some sleep.”

  For the first time since my accident, I go to sleep with a smile on my face.

  Chapter 21

  Bianca

  “We barely see each other,” Stone states. “I really think you should just move in before the semester ends.”

  One look at his mother, who’s sitting across the table from us, tells me she finds the idea of me moving in before the wedding about as pleasant as a root canal.

  Feeling’s mutual, lady.

  Nonetheless, Stone has a point. We’ve both been so busy this semester we hardly have time for one another.

  But I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t enjoying my independence. It’s nice being able to come and go as I please and not be accountable to anyone when it comes to my whereabouts.

  Especially his mother, who always finds a way to make rude comments under her breath about me.

  On one hand, I understand why she harbors so much ill will. Stone and Tommy no longer talk since Stone beat him up and kicked him out last year, and to say there’s a rift between her sons would be putting it mildly.

  However, it’s not my fault her firstborn is a giant douche canoe who deserves to have a venomous snake bite his testicles off.