Awake

by Riana Lucas

  I continue to observe the other fae at our table. Thorne and Gideon, both very handsome this evening, appear to be having a pleasant time. Four of the queen’s friends have also joined us, two on each side of her, and seem to actually be genuine friends of hers. In the unseelie court, all of the king’s friends are for appearances alone. They listen to his stories, agree to his comments and suggestions when told, laugh when prompted, and otherwise stay silent.

  I am finding many aspects of the seelie court are different from the unseelie, which causes me to grow fonder of this court every day. If not for Rho and Reed…well, that is not even a thought worth thinking. I know I must return to my rightful home.

  I look over and see the queen studying me curiously as I have been watching the others. Her beautiful green eyes are soft, giving the impression of contentment. I wonder what has made her so happy. Her friends must bring her a great deal of pleasure. She smiles kindly at me, and I return the smile. I am also content sitting here among those I could in time call my friends. As I finish my glance around the table, I spot an empty chair to the left of the queen. Too busy studying everyone else, I did not realize someone was missing. I do not need to be told who the seat belongs to, though, because she is making her way to it now.

  Holly.

  My body tenses automatically, and I sense Willow's does the same. Her head snaps up, eyes darting between me and Holly. My hands reach to my lap so I can pull up my dress. My daggers are strapped to my thighs, above my knees for easy access. I glance over at Willow when her hand touches mine under the table. She shakes her head once, squeezing my hand. How she already knows what I am thinking is a complete mystery to me, but I decide to trust my friend.

  I drop the hem of my dress but rest my hands in my lap, just in case. I notice everyone else at the table is tense as well—all but the queen. Making eye contact with her, I see the knowledge in her eyes, along with approval. The queen seems to be aware of what I was thinking and that I am holding back a great deal, trying to be the better fae. She also somehow knows what it is costing me, how difficult it is for me to sit her and remain quite while my enemy approaches. Oddly, it appears as if she is actually…proud?

  I shake my head in confusion for the thousandth time. Breakfast could not come soon enough.

  Holly had not detected my presence at the table, because she comes to an abrupt stop a few feet away. Her lip curls up at the side as she looks at me. Her hands clench into fists at her side, her features begin to sharpen as her natural instincts to prepare for battle take over.

  “Holly!” the queen snaps, quiet but with obvious command. Holly immediately stops, bowing her head like an obedient dog. I almost laugh aloud at the thought. Thankfully I am able to stop myself. That would be rude.

  “Forgive me, My Queen,” Holly mumbles.

  “We’ll see. Now come, sit and use your manners. You will be respectful to all of my guests or you will not join us. Do you understand?”

  “Yes, My Queen.” Holly moves slowly to her seat. She shoots one more glare in my direction before turning to the servant who approaches her.

  As I watch, a voice says from my other side, “Wow. She really doesn’t like you, does she?”

  I turn in surprise to the whispered question, and to the fae who voiced it. Thorne winks at me, and this time I cannot help but laugh. Thorne's playful personality was just the right thing to help loosen some of the tension. Willow and Gideon chuckle as well as I take a deep breath. I will not allow her to ruin my evening, not after getting comfortable, and I will not allow her to win. And if I let her get to me, she will be doing just that.

  “Well, the feeling is mutual.” I give Thorne a wink along with a grateful smile before continuing, “But I do believe we were discussing much more important things. Willow, what was it you were telling us?” The queen smiles her approval. Holly shoots me a dirty look but losses the scowl and replaces it with a pleasant smile before the queen sees it.

  The rest of the evening continues without further incident. We laugh and joke with one another throughout dinner and dessert. The queen spends much of the time talking with us. As she does, I realize she is not only respected by her people but well-liked. Although I am still unsure of the queen’s motives for keeping me at her court and treating me so well, I cannot help but admit that I have found myself respecting her. She runs her court much like I would if I were in her place. She’s firm yet fair, and she cares for her people.

  Spending the last few days here and sitting at this dinner has opened my eyes to the ways of the seelie court as well as to the ways of the unseelie court. I have grown to recognize the ways of my court are not as common as I believed, along with the fact that all fae are not the same. My king is demanding and fierce, cruel and harsh. He does not care for his people, only himself. I used to think those were traits to admire and mimic, but now I am not so sure. Here I can see that fae respect their queen, but they love her as well. The unseelie neither respect nor love King Foxglove. They only fear him.

  When dinner finally ends, my mind is reeling with all of my newfound knowledge. The queen is the first to leave the table, rising elegantly while wishing everyone a good night. I notice Holly rise as well, before moving to the queen's side and trailing behind her as she walks a few feet from the table. Before the queen can get too far, she turns back to us. “Poppy? Would you walk with me for a moment, please?”

  Holly, who had remained silent throughout the entire evening, stiffens by the queen’s side. She glances back at me, and there is an expression in her eyes I have not seen before—one of hurt. Then she quickly turns back to the queen, causing me almost to wonder if what I saw was even there.

  I recall Willow telling me how close the two of them are and wonder if she feels threatened by me. If this is the case, then I understand Holly’s hostility a bit more, but it still does not explain why she tried to kill me in the human world. I had not been in the seelie court yet. There was no way for her to know how the queen would treat me. Before I can say anything, Holly walks briskly away from the queen. She is out of sight before I can blink.

  I turn my attention back to the queen, who is staring in the direction where Holly has just disappeared. She looks a bit sad, but when she turns back to me, her smile lights up her eyes once again. This reaction makes me more eager to spend a few moments alone with her. Our breakfast in the morning has been at the back of my mind all night. I practically jump at the opportunity to sneak in a few questions and possible answers.

  I turn to my friends to wish everyone a good night, thanking Gideon and Thorne for a nice dinner. Willow pulls me in for a quick hug, whispering in my ear as she does, “Thank you so much, Poppy.” I can hear the tears in her voice, and so I squeeze her tight.

  “You are welcome,” I whisper back. Then more loudly I say, “Gideon, would you be a gentleman and escort Willow back to her room, please?”

  “Of course. I would be honored.” He moves closer to me as if to embrace me, but when I narrow my eyes at him, he quickly takes a step back, and his cheeks turn pink. Thorne does not miss the action, causing him to stifle a laugh. I shake my head and tell them all good-night once again before making my way to the queen’s side.

  The conversation is light as we begin to walk together.

  “So you truly aren’t interested in Gideon?” She gives me a sly look that I return with a stern one, which only causes her to giggle. I cannot help but to smile at her. “Okay, okay. I think it might be for the best anyway. He seemed unable to take his eyes off our Willow, did he not?”

  I smile once again, having had the same thought. “Yes, he did. He is a very kind fae and very strong. Willow needs someone like him.”

  The queen nods. “Time will tell.”

  We are both quiet for a moment, but I cannot stand the silence. “So…” I begin, hoping to prompt her into something a bit more serious.

  “I wanted to thank you, Poppy.” I raise my eyebrows in question, and she elaborates. “It takes
a strong person to stand down when they are near their enemies. I know you don’t care for Holly, but I do, and I appreciate you allowing her to dine with us this evening.”

  “Well, thank you, but it was not I who gave her permission. You did.” I hesitate before continuing, wondering if it is my business, but the queen’s words help me in my decision.

  “Don’t be shy, child. Ask me what is on your mind.”

  “Why does she hate me so much? You approve of my being here. Should that not be enough for her as well?”

  “Yes. It should, but I am afraid my approval of you is the problem. She doesn’t trust you and therefore doesn’t like my involvement with you. It will take her time, but she will come to trust you as well.”

  “You trust me? Is that wise? I am from the enemy court.”

  “Yes, but that’s of no consequence to me. I trust you, Poppy.”

  “Why?”

  She opens her mouth, but thinks better of it and closes her lips again. I begin to speak, hoping I can get her to continue, but before I can say anything she cuts me off. “I know this is confusing for you, but I give you my word. I will explain everything to you in the morning. Now is not the time or the place.” She gives me a kind smile as she continues, “Besides, I am exhausted and need my beauty sleep. I will see you in the morning, Poppy.” She reaches out, her hand gently brushing my hair back. “Sweet dreams, my child,” she whispers before turning quickly and moving into the room behind us. Before I can respond, the door is closed, and I find myself alone in the hall, staring at her door and more confused than before about why I am here and what it is exactly that the queen wants with me.

  Chapter Eight

  Darkness surrounds me as I make my way down the corridor. My surroundings are familiar, but I am not quite sure where I am yet, or how I came to be here, for that matter. I follow my instincts, making turns, unsure of where they will lead me. For some reason, I am familiar with the path I should take, and even if I am unsure of my final destination, I have an overpowering need to get there.

  I begin to walk more and more quickly until I soon find myself running. First I turn right, then left. This happens so many times I soon lose track. Although it is still dark, the smell is growing stronger, more familiar, like the dungeons in the unseelie court. So that is where I am and why everything seems so familiar. I have escorted prisoners here often enough to know the way by heart.

  What am I doing here now? I am alone, and there is no reason to even be here. However, the urge to keep going grows along with my anxiety. Then I hear it—the sound that must have drawn me here in the first place.

  “Poppy?”

  I stop running so I can listen for a moment to ensure my ears are not playing tricks on me.

  “Poppy? Where are you?”

  “Reed?” I whisper in disbelief. Where is he, and how am I hearing him?

  “Poppy, we need you. Please hurry.”

  “Reed!” This time I shout. I begin running once again in the direction of his voice. “Where are you?”

  “Poppy! Is it really you? We’re here!”

  “Where, Reed? I cannot see you. The room is much too dark. Why are you in the dungeon?”

  “I don’t know. We were put here as soon as I arrived in the faery realm. We need your help.”

  “Who? Who is with you?” I am still running, but I cannot find him. His voice does not get any closer. Instead, it surrounds me. I cannot tell which direction the noise is coming from, giving me the impression of running in circles. Nothing makes sense. I am aware I am in the unseelie dungeon, but I do not recall it being this large.

  “Rho. Rho is in here with me.”

  This stops me once again. “Rho? Why?”

  “I’m not sure, Poppy, but you must help us. Hurry! Please?"

  “I am coming, Reed. I cannot seem to get to you.” Picking up speed, I continue to run in what I hope is the right direction.

  Reed’s voice begins to fade now as he says “Please, Poppy. Please hurry. I need you.”

  I barely hear the last part as his voice fades further. I begin shouting for him, “Reed! Reed! Reed, answer me. I cannot find you if you do not answer me! Reed!” I wail when I know he is not going to respond.

  My heart clenches; my stomach drops, and I run as fast as I can now. Sweat drips down my back and all over my face, but I cannot give up. He and Rho are in trouble, and they are depending on me to find and help them. I will not give up until they are safe.

  I bolt up in my bed, breathing heavily, heart pounding, and drenched in sweat. This is something I am becoming accustomed to since I have woken up the last few mornings in the seelie court.

  Except this time, I remember my entire dream. Reed and Rho need me.

  I realize it was a dream, but there was something so real about the voices and the fear within them. My instincts are screaming at me to get to them as soon as possible. Having never doubted my instincts before, I do not intend to start now. In a hurry, I throw the blanket off my heated body and stumble to the washroom. I rinse the sweat from my face and neck and place my hair in its usual braid before rushing to the closet to grab my satchel. Quickly throwing a change of clothes in, I pull on a similar outfit — just like the one I wore the day I met Reed.

  I stop for a moment to remember the day that led to this one. Rho was concerned for me because of the rumors of the queen overpowering our court, but I brushed it off. I met Reed and disregarded him as no more than a stupid halfling. It is amazing how important these two have become to me and how I treated them in return. I shake my head at the thought. I need to focus on the task at hand. When I get to them and reassure myself they are safe, I will apologize for my behavior and make everything up to them. I am not sure what I will do if things do not work out the way I plan. It is not something I am even willing to consider.

  Grabbing my daggers, I grip them firmly before strapping them to my thighs. Once they are in place, I feel more confident. I lift my chin then straighten my back and take a deep breath. Throwing my satchel over my shoulder, I swing open the door, intending to rush out, but run straight into Willow instead.

  Her eyes widen with alarm. “Poppy? Are you okay?”

  “I have to go. Reed and Rho need me.”

  “How…how can you be sure? What happened?” she asks, baffled by my behavior.

  “I…” I hesitate, realizing I am so frantic over a dream, a dream that although I am sure is true, others will not so easily believe when I tell them. I do not care, though. My friends need me, and I will not be deterred. I lift my chin defiantly. “I dreamt of them, well, of Reed. He said he and Rho were in trouble and they need me. I must go find them.”

  Willow stares into my eyes for a moment as if trying to make sure I have not gone mad. She must see the clarity and determination in them, though, because she nods curtly before turning around. “I’ll meet you in the dining hall. You must let the queen know where we’re going. I’ll only be a moment.”

  Before I have a chance to correct her on the we she used, she is gone. I will handle that in a moment, because she is right; I must speak to the queen. With everything that happened, I had forgotten about our meeting this morning. At least I know where I can find her fast.

  Walking with purpose to the queen's private dining room and not wishing to waste time, I think of how I will explain this to her. Unfortunately, it only takes a moment to get to her chambers and, by the time I arrive, I am still unsure of what to say to convince her to let me go. I raise my hand to knock but hesitate. As if sensing my presence, the queen opens the door. She takes one look at me, and I instantly see her body going rigid and her eyes becoming more alert. How does she detect when something is wrong?

  Her brow crinkles as she asks, “Poppy, what’s wrong?”

  “I am sorry, Queen Lily, but I must return to the unseelie court at once.”

  “Why, my child? What’s happened?”

  “My friends are in trouble.”

  An expression of genuin
e concern enters her eyes, but I do not have time to question her. “Have you received a message?”

  “No.” I hesitate once again but decide to be honest. “No. I dreamt of them. Reed asked me for my help.”

  “Your halfling?” she asks with a bit of shock in her voice, her eyes widening as well.

  “He is not my halfling, but yes, Reed is the halfling I was to bring back from the human world to the unseelie court. When I came here, Damien took Reed home. Now I suspect he and Rho are in trouble.” She stares at me for a moment in disbelief. I am sure the look of shock and uncertainty has something to do with my loyalty to a halfling, but there is no time for anger. “I apologize, but I must leave immediately.”

  The queen shakes her head as she says with a hint of pleading in her voice, “No, Poppy. You cannot go. Returning to the unseelie court is much too dangerous. I don’t know what I would do if something happened to you.”

  I was about to cut her off, telling her she did not have a choice, but I snap my mouth shut when the rest of her sentence registers. “Why would you care if something happened to me?”

  Taking a deep breath before exhaling slowly, she says, “Please, come and sit with me.” There is an objection on the tip of my tongue, but she holds up her hand to stop my rebuttal. “Please? I can tell you want to leave now, but I need to speak with you first. Once we have spoken, you may decide what you wish to do, and I will consent. Is that fair?”

  The desperation in her eyes overrules my anxiousness to be on my way. “Yes, that is fair. I mean no disrespect, but this must be quick, and I am afraid nothing you can say will persuade me to abandon my friends.”

  Once I give her my warning, I begin to walk stiffly past her but stop in my tracks when I hear a loud huff. Glancing up, I am a bit startled to see Holly sitting at the table. Apparently I had been so distracted I did not even notice her presence. Glancing at her now, I see she appears to be pouting. In a different situation, I might have laughed at the childishness of it, but not now.