Pink Flamingoed

by Steve Demaree

  “I know, but it’s the only way we’ll know what Harry and Ethel ordered for dinner.”

  Frank smiled and complied.

  “I’ll be right back.”

  In a few minutes Frank returned with another smile on his face.

  “Whatever you said must have worked. Ethel ordered Veal Oscar and Harry ordered the pan fried trout.”

  “I must remember to kiss him for this, Frank.”

  “Who knows? He might want to kiss you, too.”

  “Would you be jealous if he did?”

  “Of course. Shouldn’t I be?” Frank answered as he grinned from ear to ear.

  +++

  Ethel looked down at her entree, thinly-sliced veal scaloppini topped with crab meat, asparagus, and hollandaise sauce.

  “What are you thinking, Ethel?” Harry asked.

  Ethel looked at Harry and smiled.

  “I was just thinking about how special this is. I’d heard of Veal Oscar, but now I’ve had a chance to try it. It’s even better than I imagined.”

  Ethel’s comments made Harry choke up a little, something he seldom did. He knew that his wife would no longer look at the hamburger and macaroni casserole he requested she make so often in quite the same way as before. But somehow he knew he could work through this. But Harry’s next comment told the world that his thoughts were not focused on how much this experience might cost him, but on the smile he saw on his wife’s face.

  “Ethel, honey. Have you ever tried crème brûlée or bananas Foster?”

  “No, I don’t believe I have.”

  “Well, why don’t we add to the occasion? Let’s order both of them for dessert and share. I feel like splurging tonight.”

  Those words seemed to hang on Harry’s tongue, as if he were suddenly speaking in a foreign language. If Harry had ever said the word “splurge,” he did not mean it was something he ever planned to do.

  +++

  Among the last to leave, Brad and Amy savored their time together, as well as each morsel of food. Eventually, they finished their desserts and noticed that the restaurant was almost deserted. They walked out and found the horse, horseman, and carriage waiting for them in front of Martinelli’s.

  “Are you up to a little spin before I take you home?”

  “Absolutely,” answered Amy, not wanting the night to end.

  “Driver, once around the park.”

  “Yes, sir,” answered the grinning driver, knowing there was not a park in sight.

  It had begun to snow, but that did not deter Brad and Amy. Amy rested her head on Brad’s shoulder as she thought of her fairy tale evening. After half an hour, Brad directed the driver to take them back to Aylesford Place, and this time, their adventure did take them through a park, Aylesford Park. When the carriage pulled up in front of Amy’s house, Brad jumped down, walked around to Amy’s side of the carriage, and held out his hand to help her down. Brad turned and gave the driver a tip and thanked him again for the impeccable service.

  Brad escorted Amy to her door. They stood holding hands, looking at each other. The clip clop of the horse’s hooves grew fainter with each step until there was silence.

  Finally, Amy broke the silence.

  “I had a wonderful time.”

  “Me, too,” Brad said, as he took Amy in his arms and kissed her. They continued to embrace until a chill overcame Amy. Then, they moved slightly apart, smiled at each other, kissed again. Then, Amy unlocked the door and went inside.

  Amy closed the door, leaned against it. After a minute or so she turned the light on, then the phone rang.

  “What do you want, Cora?” Amy asked as she picked up the phone.

  “The name’s Holmes, and I just wanted to tell you that I love you, Dr. Watson.”

  “I love you, too, Mr. Holmes.”

  “Good night, my love,” Brad said as he hung up the phone.

  Before Amy could hang up her coat, the phone rang again.

  “Okay, Mr. Holmes, what do you want this time?” Amy asked in a voice that sounded more romantic than her question.

  “The name’s Henderson,” Cora replied, “and I think you know what I want.”

  “Oh, hi, Cora. I should have known you’d call.”

  “Isn’t a mother supposed to call to find out about her daughter’s big night?”

  “Is that night with an ‘n’, or knight with a ‘kn?’” Amy asked.

  “Well, from the looks of that horse and carriage, I’m not sure. It looks like ‘some day’ is here. Your prince has come, darling.”

  “It sure looks that way. I just hope I don’t wake up some morning and find out it’s past midnight.”

  “Not a chance. Well, I know you’re tired, so I’m going to let you get to sleep. Come over tomorrow for coffee and we’ll talk some more.”

  “Yes, mother dear. As you wish.”

  +++

  Amy lay in bed unable to get to sleep. As she lay there, the phone rang.

  “Hello,” Amy said.

  “I couldn’t get to sleep. I’m just lying here thinking about you.”

  “Me, too,” Amy replied.

  “So that makes two of us who can’t get to sleep because we’re thinking about you.”

  “Oh, you know what I mean.”

  “So, what are you doing tomorrow?”

  “You mean today?”

  “Okay, today.”

  “Well, first I’m sleeping late, and then I’m going over to see my mother and tell her all about my date.”

  “Your moth.... Oh, I get it. Well, be sure to tell mom that I said ‘hi’ and that my mother’s side is still doing okay.”

  “Oh, you authors.”

  “Just remember something, girlfriend. Without authors no one would ever know that one photographer is worth a thousand words.”

  “At least. Good night, my prince.”

  “Good night, fair maiden.”

  Mother Cora

  Amy slept until ten, then got up, ate breakfast, and showered. After she got out of the shower, she slipped into comfortable clothes and strolled next door to have coffee with Cora. Amy’s visit lasted an hour and she and Cora relived the events of the previous evening. Amy had planned to go home after she left Cora’s, but jogged across the street to visit with Allison, instead.

  “Well, Amy. I was just thinking about you.”

  “Oh.”

  “Didn’t you say you and Brad were going out for Valentine’s Day?”

  “Yes, and it was wonderful. He called for me on his white horse. He brought me roses, and then he took me to Martinelli’s.”

  “What do you mean ‘his white horse?’”

  “Didn’t you see? Brad arranged for a carriage to take us to Martinelli’s.”

  “Oh, Amy, I think this one’s a keeper. By the way, I’m going to Martinelli’s tonight.”

  “Tonight? What’s going on tonight?”

  “I wouldn’t expect you popular types to know anything about this, but Martinelli’s sets aside the day after Valentine’s Day for us lonely types to dine as a group. They put all the tables together, so no one feels like a single and we’re all part of the group.”

  “Really? Sounds like fun. How many people do they have?”

  “I don’t know. I’ve never been, and, to tell you the truth, I’m a little apprehensive about going.”

  “You? Apprehensive about something?”

  “Oh, you don’t know me very well. I’m the life of the party in a crowd, but when I think I might have to talk to some guy one to one, I turn to Jell-O.”

  “You’ll do great! And you’ll have to call me tomorrow and tell me all about it. Well, I guess I’d better be going. Remember to call me and let me know about your night as a swinging single.”

  Amy said goodbye and half-walked half-skipped across the street.

  Brad stood on his front porch, and called out.

  “Excuse me, but did you lose a white horse?”

  “No, but I lost a white knight,” Amy r
eplied as she ran toward him.

  “No, you didn’t, and you’re not going to, either.”

  “So how are you, today?” Amy asked after they embraced.

  “Wasted. I planned to write, but all I could think of was you. I’m sorry, but you just don’t fit in as a victim, suspect, or murderer.”

  “Can you write me in as a fairy princess in a story where the clock never strikes midnight?”

  “Dr. Watson, The Fairy Princess. I can see it now. I expect it will sell millions.”

  “Oh, so you don’t think it will do as well as your other books?”

  +++

  Shortly after Amy left, someone rang Frank and Cora’s doorbell. Frank went to see who it was.

  “Why, come in, Harry? What can we do for you?”

  “Frank, would it be okay to speak to Cora a minute?”

  “Of course, Harry. Oh, Cora, it’s for you.”

  “Oh, hi, Harry. You didn’t come to ask me to split the bill with you, did you?”

  “No, Cora, but if you insist, I’d be willing to do that.”

  “And take away from your memory of the first time you ever shelled out any money for anything.”

  “Oh, you know it wasn’t the first time. After all, I bought my house, didn’t I? Anyway, the reason I came over was to thank you. Ethel is still talking about what a great time she had last night.”

  Not only were Harry’s thoughts on how much his wife enjoyed the experience, but on how much he enjoyed it, too. He thought of the crème brûlée, and how he chopped through the crusty cover to the scrumptious cream below. It reminded him of someone falling through the ice and not calling out to be rescued. Harry decided that he and Ethel must go back to Martinelli’s again, if only for dessert, and he would get a crème brûlée all to himself, even if it did cost $5.95 a serving.

  “Oh, Harry,” Cora said, and leaned over and kissed him on the forehead.

  “Cora, you won’t tell Ethel that you were the one who made me take her to that place, will you?”

  “Harry, I’m sure that she already knows, but that’s not important. You took her, and you spent your money on her. That’s all that matters and she loves you for doing it.”

  “I love her, too. I’d love to do more for her, but I have to watch my money. I’m afraid that something will happen to me and Ethel won’t have enough to live on.”

  “Harry, there isn’t something you’re not telling us, is there?”

  “No, we’re both fine. I’m just afraid. That’s all.”

  “Harry, you’ve got plenty of money. You made good money when you were working. You invested it wisely. If something happened to you, well, Ethel would have enough to live on for twenty years. The house alone would be worth that much.”

  “I’m sorry, I’m so thrifty.”

  “The word is tightwad, Harry.”

  “I like thrifty better.”

  “Harry, I love you, but I’m not going to ease up on you.”

  “I know that, Cora. Boy, do I know that. But I know that you only do it because you care.”

  +++

  Harry had been gone only ten minutes when Frank and Cora’s doorbell rang again.

  “You might as well get it, Cora,” Frank said. “It’s always for you.”

  Frank was right. Cora answered the door and found Melanie standing on the other side.

  “Well, come in, Melanie. What can I do for you today?”

  “Cora, I needed someone to talk to and I figured you were my best shot.”

  “Give me your best shot, Melanie. What is it you need?”

  “Well, Cora, as you know, I had a date last night and we went to Martinelli’s. It was an okay date, but I didn’t feel any sparks. What’s wrong with me, Cora?”

  “Let me ask you something, Melanie. Who asked who to go to Martinelli’s last night?”

  “Well, Cora, I kind of asked him.”

  “And there were no sparks either way?”

  “I don’t think so.”

  “Melanie, you came to me and wanted to know what I think. Well, let me level with you. You’re an attractive young lady and a wonderful person, but sometimes, Melanie, the guys like to do the chasing.”

  “But, Cora, I’m afraid. I’m not getting any younger and I’m afraid I’m going to end up an old maid.”

  “Melanie, how old are you?”

  “Twenty-seven.”

  “Twenty-seven is still a young woman. Lots of women today don’t get married until thirty or thirty-five. Just be patient. When God has the right man for you, and it’s the right time for you, He’ll get the two of you together.”

  “You really think so, Cora?”

  “I really think so, Melanie. Now, go home and ask God to give you the patience you need to wait for the man He has in mind for you.”

  “Thanks, Cora. I always feel better after talking to you.”

  Melanie hugged Cora and said goodbye to Cora and Frank.

  After Melanie left, Frank turned to Cora.

  “Do you remember the woman you talked about who was sorry she didn’t have any children? Looks like she has all the children she can raise. By the way, Cora, what time is your next caller coming?”

  “I’m not sure, Frank. And while I can see where God has given me children of a different kind, I could never think of Harry as one of my children.”

  “Nor I, Cora. Nor I,” Frank said, and they enjoyed a good laugh.

  +++

  Cora checked her e-mail and found that she had a message from Doris Orthmyer. Doris e-mailed to ask how everyone was doing and to let Cora know that the temperature had gotten up to 72 degrees in Florida that day. Cora felt sorry for Ray and Doris because they did not get to see their friends on Aylesford Place every week, the way she and Frank did.

  +++

  After seeing Cora and Allison and spending a couple of minutes with Brad, Amy went home to make a difficult phone call. It was time to tell her mother about Brad. After a few minutes of small talk, Amy decided to lift the burden from her shoulders.

  “Mom, you remember I told you I had a new neighbor?”

  “I don’t think you told us about any new neighbor.”

  “Well, maybe it slipped my mind. He moved in a little before Christmas, and you know how hectic things get around Christmas.”

  “Did you say ‘he,’ like in a man?”

  “No, Mom, it’s a four-year-old child. He won the lottery and decided to venture out on his own.”

  “Amy, don’t get my hopes up for nothing. You’ve been seeing this guy, haven’t you?”

  “Well, of course, Mom. Most people see their neighbors from time to time.”

  “You know what I mean. How many times have you seen him?”

  “Oh, I don’t know. Maybe fifty or so.”

  “Fifty? Has he proposed?”

  “Mom, he only asked me out for the first time last night.”

  “It took him fifty times to ask you out once. Oh, well. I can always hope one of your sisters finds someone soon.”

  Amy was not about to tell her mother that one of her sisters had found someone. Instead, she addressed her mother’s remark.

  “Mom, we’ve kind of been seeing each other. We’ve like eaten at my place a few times, and we talk almost every day.”

  “So, he’s been sponging off you. Are you saying he’s a tightwad like that other neighbor of yours?”

  “No way, Mom. He took me to an expensive restaurant last night, and not only that, he brought me roses and picked me up in a carriage drawn by a white horse.”

  “This isn’t some more of that weird humor of yours, is it?”

  “No, Mom. He really did all that, and Mom, this one’s really special.”

  “Did he kiss you goodnight?”

  “You sound like the pastor’s son.”

  “Well, did he?”

  “Of course, Mom. He even kissed me bye when I left to come home for Christmas.”

  “And you forgot to tell us about the first g
uy who’d kissed you in years?”

  “It hadn’t been years, Mom.”

  “Well, it seemed like years. So, when’s the wedding?”

  “I knew I shouldn’t have called. He only asked me out last night.”

  “Yeah, but he’s been kissing you for a couple of months. Amy, there’s not a lot of guys anymore who’ll spring for flowers and a horse and carriage. Give him a week. If he hasn’t asked you to marry him by then, you ask him.”

  “Goodbye, Mom.”

  “Goodbye, Amy. I’ll take some vacation time soon and come up and spend a few days with you.”

  “Don’t you dare, Mom.”

  Amy hung up the phone and wondered if she had done the right thing. Amy’s mom hung up the phone, remembered that Amy had given her Cora’s number one time, and decided to see what the woman knew about this new Casanova.

  +++

  Amy sat, reflecting upon her conversation with her mother when her phone rang.

  “Hello.”

  “Guess who I was just talking with?”

  “I don’t know, Cora, your psychiatrist?”

  “No, yours.”

  “Huh?’

  “Your mother just called me, Amy. So, you told her about you-know-who.”

  “My mother called you? I knew I shouldn’t have told her. So, what did you tell her?”

  “Just that the two of you were pretty serious, and that his parole officer doubted if he would repeat any of his crimes.”

  “Very funny, Cora. Come clean.”

  “I covered for you, Amy. Don’t worry.”

  “If my mother comes knocking at my door any day soon, I’m sending her to your place.”

  “Just don’t answer the door. When she comes over here, I’ll tell her you moved to the house behind the wall.”

  “She is my mother, Cora, and I do love her. Just send her over to see Harry. Then, maybe she’ll hurry home.”

  +++

  Before Amy could sit down after hanging up from talking to Cora, the phone rang again. Good thing Amy did not have anything else to do.

  “Telephone operator. How may I direct your call?”