Waiting for Something

by Whitney Tyrrell

  “Ali!” The girls from dance came running in.

  “Hey, guys! Oh my gosh, flowers? Thank you so much,” I smiled at all the flowers they had.

  “We know how much you love daisies so we bought a lot. Like a couple dozen,” Darian smiled.

  “You guys are the best. Thank you so much,” I smiled.

  “I feel terrible,” Caley sat by me as the other girls chatted.

  “Don’t. I shouldn’t have been texting and driving. It’s my fault, and hey, I’m alive.” I felt bad that she felt bad.

  “I shouldn’t have responded or I should have told you to stop texting. I just wish I could repay you,” she looked sluggish.

  “You did, by bringing me all these gorgeous daisies.” I drank more water.

  “It was my idea,” she grinned.

  “I figured,” I yawned.

  “Are you tired? Should we leave?” She sat up immediately.

  “No, just restless and really sore.” I tried to readjust.

  “Well, heal up. We need you at the studio.” Her voice sounded cheerful.

  The girls stayed for about a half hour and then they left. Then my parents stopped in to say they were going to go home for a couple of hours and come back. I needed my space anyways. I was actually really exhausted.

  I woke up with someone nudging me and I had forgotten I was in the hospital.

  “Ali, it’s me. Marlie.” Her voice was quiet.

  “Marlie? What are you doing here?” I slowly sat up.

  “I brought you these, but it looks like you already have plenty.” She handed me my secret flower that I never tell anyone about, a lily.

  “A lily? No one knows about my secret favorite flower,” I grabbed the single lily.

  “You told me that time I stayed at your house and you were talking to me about how torn you were with Jake and Carter.” She acted like it was no big deal, but it to me it was everything.

  “Marlie, I’m sorry for everything,” tears welled in my eyes.

  “You have no idea.” She hugged me close and was careful of my ribs, which I was thankful for.

  “Truce?” I smiled slightly.

  “Pretty please,” she grinned.

  “So how long have I been in here?” I felt like it’s been days.

  “You came in yesterday and they’re letting you out tomorrow, so not too long. I stopped by yesterday but you were passed out,” she sat beside me.

  “Has Carter or Justin come by?” I was curious.

  “Yeah, both of them. At different times, though. Thank God. They got into a huge fight today in school. Fists and everything! Both have detention.” I could tell she felt horrible.

  “I’m sorry, Marlie. You needed me and I wasn’t there for you,” I grabbed her hand.

  “I don’t blame you. I would have done the same thing.” Her honesty was refreshing.

  “Marlie, we’ll be friends forever. You know that, right?” I smiled.

  “Yeah. No doubt,” she grinned.

  “So how’s school?” I changed the mushy topic.

  “Boring. I have all your homework. It’s not much, though. Oh! Before I forget, how are you and Jake?” she wanted deets.

  “Well I don’t know honestly. I know we have something. But what will happen when he gets back and everything goes back to normal?” I sighed heavily.

  “First, I’m sure you’ll be just the same. And second, you need to tell Carter or he’ll be even more hurt. Ali, he still has feelings for you. We talked about it that night I fucked up so bad.” She looked at me.

  “I know I need to tell him. I just don’t know how or when. I’ll tell Carter, I promise.” Right as I finished my sentence, guess who came in? Carter. My luck lately is impeccable.

  “What do you need to tell me?” He was holding sunflowers and a balloon which was really sweet.

  “Perfect timing. I’ll see you later. Call me,” she whispered and got up without acknowledging Carter.

  “Sunflowers? I love sunflowers,” I smiled at him.

  “I know. That’s why I got them because I figured most people would get you your absolute favorite, daisies,” he set them by the other flowers.

  “Well, thank you. Come sit,” I patted the bed.

  “You’re looking better. I was really scared, Ali. I thought I’d never see you again,” he grabbed my hand nonchalantly.

  “I’m alive and kicking, I promise,” my smile was weak because I knew what was bound to come.

  “So what do you need to tell me?” his eyes sparkled.

  “Carter, I do have feelings for someone else and that is why I broke up with you.” My throat suddenly felt dry.

  “Oh, who is it?” his face fell immediately.

  “You’re not going to like the answer. But I should let you know he likes me back.” My skin started to burn.

  “Just please. Tell me who it is.” I could feel the pain in his heart.

  “It’s your brother.” His eyes widened at my response.

  “You’re fucking kidding me!” he shouted. “Jake?! My brother. How dare you! How could you do this to me?!” He stood up and paced around.

  “Carter, please calm down. We didn’t mean for it to happen,” my eyes followed him.

  “Blah, blah, blah. I don’t give a shit.” His voice was still loud.

  “Carter, seriously, chill out,” I tried to sound calm.

  “Really? Really?! You want me to “chill out”? Fuck, Ali, you’ve gone behind my back and with my brother!” His voice rose to a yell and I was glad that the door was shut.

  “Carter, leave. Now.” I was getting pissed.

  “If you and Jake ever become anything I’ll make damn sure it ends just as fast as it begins,” he pointed his finger at me and stormed out.

  My life in San Diego is just wonderful. First Carter, then Jake’s gone, then the whole thing with Marlie and Justin, and then the wreck and now this? Oh, wait, almost forgot. I got a letter from Jake sayng he had to stay until graduation, which sucked. I was planning to go out still, but I had hoped he would be back sooner. But I’m so proud of him that I had to hold on to the one thing keeping me going, I’d see him at graduation.

  Once I finally got to leave the hospital my ribs weren’t as sore but still painful. The doctor said I could go back to school but no physical activity and I couldn’t lift much weight.

  As I sat in my bed Wednesday night the day before I got to go back to school, I felt the sudden realization of Carter’s threat. Maybe it was fate’s way of telling me that Jake and I were never meant to be. And maybe this whole ordeal would just end in pain and heartache.

  “Mom, Marlie is coming to take me to school today,” I walked down the steps slowly.

  “Alright, wear your seatbelt,” she looked up at me while I got my cereal.

  “Mom, I’m not stupid.” I rolled my eyes.

  “You were the first time,” Dillon mumbled.

  “Dillon, behave,” my mom glared.

  I finished breakfast right before I heard Marlie honk in front of my house. I wasn’t really too thrilled to be going back to school just because I’m dreading the looks and the fake “are you ok’s”. The only thing I had to look forward to was Jake’s call tonight and even then it wasn’t going to be the best because I had to tell him about the wreck.

  “Hey, beautiful. You know, for just getting out of the hospital you look styling,” Marlie smiled.

  “Fashion never sleeps,” I sighed.

  “Hey, it’ll be fine today. You got me and I know Justin feels like it’s his fault, so you have him too,” she pulled out of my driveway.

  “I know. It’s just I wish school was over.” I rested my head.

  “It’s close to being done. Just think, you survived junior year.” She seemed cheerful.

  “You sound so hopeful. It’s annoying,” I rolled my eyes.

  “You’re very bitter today,” she stated and I was. I didn’t care either.

  We got to the parking lot of the school and
already two girls walking by noticed me and whispered. Not only did the wreck happen but Carter found out about me and Jake and so that means so did everyone else. Marlie and I walked to our lockers. Mine was five away from hers. Then we headed to class, beating Carter, thankfully.

  “Hey I’m Jake and Carter’s cousin. You want me next?” some kid walked and said a little too loudly.

  “Excuse me?” I was appalled. This wasn’t a game to me.

  “You know, since you just like to keep it in the family.” He sat down and some kids started snickering.

  “I don’t have to prove myself to you, thank you very much. And, no, I don’t date douche bags.” I felt my blood rise and the snickering suddenly stopped.

  “Way to go,” Marlie gave me a thumbs up.

  That was the most dramatic thing to happen until lunch rolled around and that was just a brutal nightmare. Marlie and I were going through the line and the “fab five” had just gone through the line with Justin closely by their side, which was odd.

  “What’s with Justin and the five?” I leaned towards Marlie.

  “Don’t know, but it doesn’t matter.” Her tone was harsh but I could understand why.

  We walked up to our usual table and Justin quickly planted himself by our sides.

  “Um, hi.” I took a bite of my carrot.

  “Hey. Hi, Marlie,” he acknowledged us and then began to eat like we weren’t even there. I gave Marlie a look and she gave me the same.

  “Justin, why are you sitting with us?” I finally broke the silence.

  “Because I have no one else to sit with,” he mumbled.

  “That’s a lie,” Marlie snapped.

  “Like you lied about having feelings for only me? Yeah, you’re probably pretty good at picking out liars!” His voice rose a notch.

  “Justin, calm down. She knows what she did was wrong, and she’s apologized. Give her a break,” I tried to break the tension.

  “Fuck off, Ali. You’re a two-faced bitch.” He went over to the trash can, dumped his tray and walked violently away.

  “What the hell was that?” I looked at Marlie in shock.

  “I have no idea,” she gulped and looked like she was on the verge of tears.

  “I’ll meet you in five.” I let her go run to the restroom before she broke down.

  I had to quickly finish eating the fruit I had and I didn’t even touch the spaghetti we were having.

  I got up and headed over to dump my tray when the five stopped me.

  “What do you want?” I rolled my eyes.

  “You’re a bit of a slut, aren’t you?” Chelsea spoke.

  “No, I’m not.” I didn’t feel like arguing.

  “No, you are,” she stopped me from walking and people started to watch.

  “Last time I checked I’m more of a virgin than you are,” I snapped.

  “You little bitch!” she started yelling.

  “Calm down,” I backed up a little.

  “You stole Carter from me! Then you try to make people feel bad for your sorry ass by getting in a wreck! You’re an attention whore and I know Jake slept with you!” Everyone was staring at us now and Carter stood up.

  “I didn’t steal anything, Chelsea, and you think I wanted to almost die?! You’re dumber than the rest of your group. I’ve never had sex with anyone, okay? And I don’t know why you think I’m an attention whore when you’re always bringing attention to yourself!” I got up in her face, and before I realized it, my chocolate milk was running down my back.

  “Sorry, bitch, check mate. C’mon, girls.” Everyone started laughing and the girls high-fived each other.

  I quickly dumped my tray and started for the restrooms and noticed Carter running after me. I stopped in front of the lockers by the ladies room and slid down them, unable to move anymore. I bawled like I’ve been wanting to for weeks now. I didn’t realize I was in pain and bleeding until Carter came and picked me up, taking me to the nurse’s office.

  “I can walk,” I whimpered.

  “It’s fine. You’re bleeding pretty badly from your hand. What’d you do?” he looked at it.

  “I don’t know. I think it is from the lockers when I hit them,” I observed the cut on my palm.

  “Jeez, you’re friggen strong. Calm down, Hulk,” he winked at me.

  “Carter, stop faking. I know you hate me.” I wiped my tears.

  “I don’t hate you. I’m mad at you still, but that doesn’t mean that I hate you. In fact, I’m still in love with you.” We walked into the office and he sat me down.

  “Don’t say that.” My heart became heavy.

  “Hey, don’t feel bad. It’s my own fault,” he shrugged.

  “I still feel terrible for what I did to you,” I sighed and the nurse came in.

  “Why, Ms. Burns, you got a nasty cut there. We’ll get you washed up and put some butterfly stitches on them and you should be fine,” the nurse smiled and went to grab the stiches while Carter cleaned up my cut.

  “Thank you for helping me,” I smiled.

  “Of course. I’ll let Marlie know what was going on.” He got tense when he said her name.

  “I think she has feelings for you.” My voice was soft.

  “I know,” he stayed monotone.

  “Do you have feelings for her?” I was curious now.

  “If I ever get over you, I know I do. It’s just you that’s keeping me from doing anything.” I knew he felt bad for admitting it, but if it was true, Carter wouldn’t lie to me.

  “Thanks for being honest even though I feel like an ass,” I snickered a little.

  “Good. You should,” he winked and the nurse came back in with the supplies to stitch me up and went to work.

  “Alright, sweetheart, you’re good to go. Here’s a pass for the both of you.” She gave us our passes and we headed to sixth period together.

  “Thanks for taking care of me,” we walked back to our lockers.

  “No problem. Now if you’d excuse me, I’m going to try and move on. So if I ignore you, don’t worry. We’re cool,” he smiled and kissed me one last time.

  “Thanks, and hey, Marlie’s perfect for you. You’ll get over me fast,” I grinned and he walked off.

  Seven

  A lot has happened in the last month. I’m completely healed and back to dance which is amazing. Marlie and I hang out a lot more and Justin, well, he and I still talk and hang out but he and Marlie are never seen together. Carter won’t even look at me still and Jake and I have been doing better ever since the whole Carter thing. I’m leaving tonight to go to Jake’s graduation and I couldn’t be more excited to see him. My parents originally weren’t going to let just me and Marlie go together but both of our grades in school are great so our parents agreed. School was over in less than a month anyway so there wasn’t any homework really.

  “Marlie, are you sure this dress is okay?” I held it up before packing it.

  “Yes! Don’t worry! You look absolutely hot in it! So where are we going anyway?” she sat on my bed.

  “It’s like an hour away but tomorrow is like a family day or whatever and he invited me to come join so I have two outfits. We’re staying in a hotel near base,” I packed my toiletry bag.

  “Awesome, do I get to go?” She grabbed Cosmo and started to browse through it.

  “Duh! I’m sure there’s going to be lots of cute Marines there, too,” I winked.

  “Better be. I’m single as fuck. Sorry.” Marlie had a sailor’s mouth.

  “Being single isn’t bad. I’m technically single,” I folded up my clothes.

  “Yeah but you basically have a guy waiting for you. I don’t,” she groaned.

  “You’ll find someone. We’re juniors. We have time,” I finished packing.

  “Alright, so what time are we leaving?” she looked at her phone.

  “Like 8:30. What time is it now?” I grabbed my suitcase and set it on the floor.

  “Like 8:30. We should get going,” she got off t
he bed.

  Once we got to the hotel we settled in and then went to go buy junk food at the gas station next to the hotel. Ladies’ night was about to begin! We stayed up later than I wanted to but it was nice to finally catch up. I found out how she really felt about the whole Carter thing and it seems to me that she likes him but I didn’t say anything. I woke up a little too early because of nerves and I also wanted to look great. This was the first time I would see him since he left. Plus, I kind of told him I wouldn’t be there and so this was going to be a big surprise.

  “Marlie, wake up! You have an hour to get ready!” I shoved her side.

  “Five more minutes,” she whined.

  “No, now. Get up! Let’s go! I’m already finished getting ready!” I removed her covers.

  “Fine, party pooper, what time is it?” she rubbed her eyes.

  “It’s 9. We have to be there by 10.” I grabbed the breakfast I brought up for her.

  “You got me breakfast? Aw, shucks. Thank you.” She took the cup of coffee I got at Starbucks and then went right for the bagel I bought with it.

  “Hurry up and eat, okay?” I sat on the edge of the bed feeling anxious.

  “Calm down. Don’t get your panties in a wad!” she took a huge bite of the bagel.

  “I’m just, like, super nervous. This will be the first time I’ve seen him in three months and now we might actually have something,” I twiddled my thumbs.

  “He’ll drop dead when he sees you in that outfit,” she sat at the desk chair.

  “His parents will be there… and so will Carter,” I dropped the bomb quickly.

  “Alice Burns! You never told me this!” The bagel in her hand fell to the floor.

  “What did you think? That’s his family.” I shrugged.

  “Does Carter know we’ll be there? Does he even know you’ll be there?” she eyed me suspiciously.

  “Not really.” I couldn’t make eye contact.

  “Well this is just perfect. I’m going to get ready.” Marlie shook her head and went to the bathroom.

  Home Stretch

  The day before graduation day. Finally after three long months. I was actually ready to be home. Carter and I were better but things were still icy between us as assumed. I mean, I never thought I’d fall for Ali like I did. She’s so innocent and she’s so frustrating at times, and I like easy and dark. But she’s got that something that makes my heart skip a beat, as cheesy as that sounds. I just had to find a way to tell her that I was going to be stationed in North Carolina and I had to leave almost immediately. Recruiters loved me for some odd reason. Maybe because I had discipline and I was way older than I seemed. She wasn’t going to be here or at the graduation. Something with dance, which to be honest, hurt me a little. I worked hard for this moment and the one person I wanted to share it with won’t be here.