“Over and over, through the years I have heard man accuse God for the troubles in the world. That if he were in control, things would be so much better! No! It is our self-righteousness and arrogance that makes us so blind that we do not see that man alone is entirely responsible for all the misery here on earth. Look how feebly we give to our brothers in need both here and abroad, look how we abandon and ignore the sick and shut-ins. Look at how our leadership is in the home; our mothers and fathers exhibiting little or no faith or love for God and Jesus? Is there daily prayer or respect for the Sabbath? Do we talk about Jesus with our family and instruct our youths His teachings as the basis for living a Godly life?
“Can we not see the disservice we do to our children who will suffer needlessly in future trials because of our shutting out our Lord or halfhearted faith? Look into your own past life, is it not true when troubles come along who is it we eventually turn too? God made us this way that we come to Him. Sooner or later we all do. Is it not best that we and our children come sooner?
“Listen to me; if we obeyed God’s commandments and the teachings laid out for us by Jesus and lived according to them, my friends, we would never fall under His judgment and heaven would be here on earth. We would never again blame God for the injustices or problems in the world!
“Listen to the voice of John the Baptist, please repent and come back home. The kingdom of heaven is at hand. Time is passing and sooner or later one of us will meet their Maker. Don’t be caught without the light of Jesus in your heart. To say you have no time for God is to say you have no time to eat. Receiving the nourishment of God’s Word is more important than the food you need to sustain yourself.
“Man cannot live by bread alone!
“My dear friends, the main reason why not too much has changed from the time Jesus came to teach us how to live is because we don’t take the time to establish a close relationship with Him. The way you can do this my friends is to do what I have been telling you over all the years I have been your parish priest. You have to get up early every morning and sit quietly with the Lord and read His Word. This is how we get to know Him and to know Him, is to love Him. You will quickly learn that His teachings have life. They are based upon truth, reality, justice and love. He did not come to walk the regions for three years and teach mankind just to get exercise. He did it out of concern and love for you to point out a path to follow that would lift you out of the world that you live in and into His world that leads to eternal life!
“Yes, we must live in the world of the human race with all of its problems and challenges, but rather than live in it with our own perceptions and efforts and faulty thinking, we do so by inviting Jesus into our lives to show us how to really live. We begin to pray, read the Bible and study and meditate on His word.
What we are doing is developing a new habit of living and thinking that gives us inner peace, purpose and meaning while at the same time living in the world man has created. Without Jesus as our guide, we live in the darkness of man’s world. Clearly He tells us, “I am the way, the truth and life.”
Father paused and allowed his gaze to sweep through the church. He raised his hand, gesturing for their attention:
“Now this is important to understand, my children. When we repent and accept Jesus into our hearts as our Lord and Savior, it doesn’t mean that our sinful nature is now gone or that life will be without struggle. No, there may be a brief honeymoon, but life goes on. God gave us a free will and He respects that and never forces His will on us. In every moment of every day, for all the days of our lives, we have to choose to live either for Him or against Him. Even though we are made of love and for love, we also have inherited a nature that is sinful from our first parents which is a part of us all the days on earth. As Jesus said, we must take up our cross daily and follow Him.
“The good news, my friends is this: the more we come to know Him and accept Him into our lives, the more grace and strength we receive to live according to His teachings. The greater and closer our relationship with Him becomes, the more peace and inner joy we receive. Coming to the Lord daily develops a new habit of living and thinking and acting until eventually it dominates the world of man and its worldly values and ways. Thoughts, actions and emotions that got us in trouble before and sent us into a frenzy now are overcome with peace. We are transforming our lives, renewing our minds, becoming a new creature in Christ!”
Father’s voice was now rising, sending shivers of excitement into the congregation.
“By coming daily to the Lord and developing this powerful relationship with Him, we are building our life; our home on a rock and no longer on the sand that washes us away as soon as a problem comes into our lives.”
Father raised both of his hands as his voice came to a crescendo.
“To say you do not have time to learn how to live a life that creates inner peace is not only foolishness of the first order, but your life will lack purpose and meaning!”
Father paused, took a deep breath and continued softly, “We have an extremely important job to do. Jesus needs all of us to come on board. He gave us all talents, abilities, and gifts and we are to use them to achieve His purposes. Recall what Jenny revealed to us in her sharing after she was overjoyed to realize at a deep level what Jesus did for her. As she shed tears of joy and gratitude, it was then that Jesus came to her and whispered, “Please Jenny, I have paid the price and opened the gates of heaven, but you and others must choose to come in. You must help Me to continue the redemption I have started. I will send you the Holy Spirit to help you, I will continue to intercede with the Father for all of you, but I need your help. Pick up your cross daily and follow me.”
“This is what the Church is all about; God’s children coming together with this common purpose to worship Him and give thanks and praise. In the Mass we celebrate what Jesus did for us in memory of Him. On the day before He died at the last supper, He took the bread, gave a prayer of thanks, broke it, and gave to his disciples. ‘Take and eat it,’ he said, ‘this is my body.’ Then He took the cup, gave thanks to God, and gave it to them. ‘Drink it, all of you,’ he said; ‘for this is my blood, which seals God’s covenant, my blood poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins.’
“Do this in memory of me’.
“My children, we offer Christ’s sacrifice on our behalf, up to God the Father, along with all our prayers, thanks and petitions at each Mass. At communion we receive His body and blood in the form of bread and wine to give us nourishment and strength to go out and continue His redemption.”
Father turned and pointed to the cross. “That, meine liebe Brüder und Schwestern in Christus, we must never forget. When you walk into the church, that must be the first thing you see and the last image you take out with you when you leave. Never take Christ’s crucifixion for granted and what He has done for you and all mankind from the beginning to the end. The cross is at the heart of Christianity; the core of our faith and belief. Never allow the cross to be removed from the Church. It is a constant reminder of what the Lord did for us; the depth of love that the Father has for you and me.
“I say this again; don’t leave without the image and memory of the crucifixion so that it is in your mind throughout the week. You need the strength of the cross. Ask the Lord to give you the grace to get down on your knees and thank Him until you weep, are broken and empty of self. Then, meine liebe Brüder und Schwestern, you will be filled with peace and full of joy. Then and only then, can you be used for His purposes.”
Father gazed hard at the congregation, as his eyes slowly swept from one side to the other. “Promise me this. Come to Him each day, just as you are and do as I ask and I promise you that eventually you will be filled so full of grace and strength and His light that you will shine before men brighter than the sun!”
Father opened his arms to his beloved people and said, “May God richly bless you and moving his right hand in the shape of the cross, he said, “Glory be to the Father and
the Son and the Holy Spirit.”
No sooner had father returned to his chair, than Margaret Tearhorst stood before the altar and as usual, sang with the voice of an angel, a song that captured the essence of what Father was saying to his sheep.
Just as I am, without one plea,
But that thy blood was shed for me,
and that thou bidst me come to thee,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
Just as I am, and waiting not
to rid my soul of one dark blot,
to thee whose blood can cleanse each spot,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
Just as I am, though tossed about
with many a conflict, many a doubt,
fightings and fears within, without,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
Just as I am, poor, wretched, blind;
sight, riches, healing of the mind,
yea, all I need in thee to find,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
Just as I am, thou wilt receive,
wilt welcome, pardon, cleanse, relieve;
because thy promise I believe,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
Just as I am, thy love unknown
hath broken every barrier down;
now, to be thine, yea thine alone,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
Chapter Sixty Two
I suppose you will never guess who this is calling?”
“I know exactly who this is. I can still remember that spellbinding conversation we had at the estate prior to marrying James. Hi Nancy, it’s so nice to hear from you!”
“I was a bit concerned about phoning since we’ve lost touch over the years. When I realized that things were not going well with you and James, I decided to withdraw and mind my own business. However, in retrospect, I don’t think that was such a good idea on my part. Perhaps if I had meddled more or been more supportive of you, the marriage might very well have worked out.”
There was a lull in the conversation. Jenny could tell that James’ mother was finding it hard to speak. Where is this going, Jenny wondered?
“I suppose you are wondering why after almost ten years I am calling?”
“It is crossing my mind, Nancy. Is it about James?” Jenny offered, trying to help open up the conversation.
“Yes, as a matter of fact it is. Do you recall when we spoke at our Manor about James and his background?”
“Absolutely, I remember almost the entire conversation. You had me sitting on the edge of my chair the entire time. That’s why I recognized your voice so quickly. I think I must have recalled what you said over a thousand times…”
“I can only imagine it was to try and find some justification for having married into this family. The Hamilton men are a tough bunch, Marjorie. They wear an iron clad shield around them and don’t let too many people enter into their lives. I never was able to with Jim. We had a relationship that was all surface…very businesslike and never showed emotion and rarely affection. I think I told you at the time that James followed very closely in his father’s footsteps and there was something else I mentioned—”
“I think I know what you are going to say, Nancy. I found it strange at the time, but you said that I have a loving heart, something which James is not used to. As you explained more of James and the family background that day I began to understand what you meant.”
“Yes, that’s right, Marjorie and I’m sure over the years of living with James, that insight was confirmed over and over. I can only imagine how difficult living with James at times must have been for you. I can say that because I too had to undergo a major adjustment to try and understand and accept Jim. It’s not easy living with a stone.”
Jenny was somewhat taken back by the analogy, yet had to admit that the metaphor was accurate.
“I recall thinking after we parted that day that I was prepared to accept the challenge. I so empathized with James after learning of his upbringing and his brother that more than anything, he needed someone who would love him. In fact, it helped me make the decision to marry James. The feelings of abandonment that would attack his heart if I were to leave him would be devastating and only reinforce his past. And, and…I loved him enough to help him find his true self…the real James, I already loved.”
“My dear, Marjorie, I am so grateful, that I was granted the years to see my stepson take such a dramatic turn in his life. I can honestly say that you have done what I thought was impossible. You do have a heart of gold. Through your untiring acceptance of, James, unconditionally, you have broken through the iron curtain surrounding his heart…Marjorie, you have ignited a spark within James that is new, so totally different, that it is almost unrecognizable because I am so used to seeing the other… Marjorie, the spark is…the spark of love…
“You have helped him truly find his true self.”
Jenny was speechless; she didn’t know how to respond. She had been getting little snippets of this from Matti noticing how different James was becoming. And, the flowers, cards and conversations with James had shown a totally new side of James…she could see it, too. But it was all too late…
Rather than be elated over what Nancy was saying, Jenny’s heart was cracking further.
“I suppose you are beginning to understand the reason for my call.”
Mrs. Hamilton hesitated, waiting for some response from Jenny, but there was none and so she went on, “I was over at the Greystone Manor yesterday. The estate looks so beautiful with all the wildflowers and butterflies…it looks so heavenly, but even more so, I was flabbergasted to see James. Marjorie, he is a changed man! His illness, though life threatening and painful has turned out to be a blessing. It slowed him down long enough to examine his life. I saw it in his father those last few months before he died. I could see regret in his eyes and I suppose if I had been able to love and accept him as you did James, he too might have died in peace and having at least some glimpse of what life is all about. But it was too late for Jim…but with James, there is promise. Marjorie, James sees what he has lost. He sees what a wonderful girl you were in his life. Marjorie, James wants you b—”
“Oh, Nancy…” Jenny was already in tears, her heart was aching. She knew now what Nancy was about to ask…she struggled with it in the garden the other day. Jesus was asking the same. No, no, no she couldn’t go back…
I love Henry so much…I want to marry him…I want to bear him a child…
“I’m so sorry if I am upsetting you. I know you have been through a lot with the divorce and the estranged relationship you had with James and your illness…you need time to think this all out. But I just wanted you to know, if you have any love left for my stepson, you would make him the happiest man in world if you were to go back…and I would love to see the two of you together again. These damn divorces come all too easy. No-one seems to try anymore…Marjorie, you have done the impossible…you, you are in my books, a saint!”
“Oh, Nancy, I have been ill for months and miraculously I have been healed. I moved to Regina to start over. My daughter is here and there is another man who has been in my life since I was fifteen. It’s a long story, Nancy, but incredibly he was healed as well, His wife passed away several years ago and a day before I died, he found me and since then we … have started to court …to see one another…”
“I understand, Marjorie. But please, consider what I have to say. The relationship you have with this other gentleman is just starting whereas with James it was a relationship you had for over twenty years. It may not have been under the best circumstances, but you have family, a son, daughter in law and grandson. It would be wonderful for you all to start over—”
“Oh, Nancy, it’s more than a teenage romance that I have with this man. It’s a love that I can’t explain, it’s a deep love, a true love…oh, you won’t understand, no-one can…Nancy, I can’t carry on this conversation any longer. It aches my heart just to think on it at this time…I
’m sorry. Nancy perhaps we can speak in a few days. I am just getting my life back together and I need time…I need time to think this all out…” Jenny’s words trailed off.
“Marjorie, I didn’t want to say this unless I had to. I don’t want to pressure you and was hoping you would decide freely, but James’ prognosis isn’t good. The doctors had ordered him to go into the hospital last week, but he refuses to go. He firmly believes that you are going to come back. He wants to see you in the garden on the estate one more time. He wants to see you on the swing in the gazebo surrounded by the wildflowers. He wants to see you strolling down the different paths in the garden. He wants to see you chasing the butterflies and the sun on your face and the wind flowing through your golden hair. I’ve never seen a man so full of imagery and desire for a woman. He is so firm on staying on the estate. If he is going to die, he wants to see these images of you one last time…”
Jenny could barely listen to another word. But Nancy’s last remarks pierced her soul.
“What a wonderful statue sits in the garden by the gazebo. James shared the wonderful story behind the Angel of Thanksgiving. Who, but you, would have started to place flowers in the angel’s basket in thanksgiving for your blessings? Usually it would be for requests. Anyway, Marjorie, every day for the last week, he makes it to the garden with great difficulty and gives thanks that you have come into his life and all you have done by accepting him and showing him true love. But most of all, he places flowers in the angel’s basket in thanksgiving for your return.”
“Oh, Nancy…I just—”
“Marjorie, I know how difficult th—”
“And, please don’t call me, Marjorie, my name is, Jenny… Oh, I’m sorry, Nancy, it’s just that…oh, I just have to go…I’m so sorry…bye.”
Angel Promises Fulfilled Page 42