Angel Promises Fulfilled

by Angel Promises Fulfilled (v5. 0) (epub)

  James shook his head, “You got me there, Marj. I must admit, I’ve seen some amazing things happen here over the past year: flowers surviving over the winter, shriveling and dying seemingly by the power of my negative thoughts, your miraculous healing the day after I put flowers in the basket in thanks for your healing…yeah, as bad a guy as I am, I just might have a guardian as well that has an ‘in’ with some big guy.” James said as he rolled his eyes heavenward.

  Jenny squeezed James’ hand and with a wink and a sparkle in her eye, she replied, “You’re not such a bad guy after all, James.”

  Chapter Seventy Four

  Jenny had trouble reading the book she had started over a week ago. Normally, she would have it finished it in two evenings, but so many thoughts sweeping through her mind interfered with her concentration.

  Her thoughts oscillated between the conversation she had with Henry an hour ago and the day she had spent with James. She missed Henry and she could tell he was getting concerned with her staying longer than she had planned. Yet she felt that this was where she was meant to be.

  She couldn’t get over the interest James was showing in her life and even Henry’s. She recalled how jealous James had been when she and Henry had dated and felt certain that he would erupt at any moment as she told of the love she had for her teenage boyfriend. He remained surprisingly calm during their entire conversation.

  How he listened and participated in the conversation at the dinner table was so out of character, yet every day during meal time, a new James was revealed. Truly, a miracle had happened in James’ life and Jenny was certain he was part of the miraculous healing that happened when she was brought back fully restored that day.

  James went to bed shortly after dinner. Jenny could see he was spent after their long extended talk in garden. He was trying to squeeze out every moment of life that he could in the time he had left. She recalled having days like that, as well, when she was sick. She had fought so hard against that disease until it snuffed out all of her energy.

  As Jenny was laying there holding the book she had tried to get into for the past half hour, there was a light rap on her bedroom door.

  “Who would that be?” She looked at the clock on the night table: 11:25. She put down the book she was reading and said, “Yes, come in…”

  The door slowly opened and Jenny was surprised to see James standing in the doorway.

  “James, I thought you would be sound asleep, you had such a long day and looked so tired at dinner time and…how did you make it up the stairs?”

  James smiled. “Love conquers all, Marjorie…actually, my guardian angel helped me. Do you mind if I come in?”

  Jenny propped her pillow up against the headboard and sat up. “No, come in James.”

  James went to the chair next to the bay window and with effort, pushed it beside Jenny’s bed and sat down.

  “I was thinking over what you told me today…”

  James paused, and then asked, “If I had been more like Henry, would there have been a chance for us?”

  Jenny looked compassionately at James and nodded, “Yes, I think there would have been. However, there was always the three of us, James.”

  “Why does it take a lifetime to learn what is really important, Marj?”

  Jenny lifted her shoulders slightly, tilted her head and smiled.

  “What keeps you so happy, Marjorie? I don’t think I have ever seen you down…”

  “The only true joy in the world, James, is to do God’s will. Especially since my healing, I am convinced more than ever that, that is what we really want. We are God’s children. He made us. He is the light at the core of our being and the more we can let it out and shine in our lives we are doing His will.”

  “And less of what we want.”

  Jenny nodded. “God is bringing you to a very beautiful point in your life, James. He and your guardian angel, I might add, are leading you so wonderfully to the truth of it all.”

  “It’s taken me all of my life to get to this point.”

  “It’s mainly because we don’t take the time to reflect on our lives and why we are here. The important thing is, James, is that you are learning this now. Many live and die, never knowing their purpose or experiencing peace. It makes me so happy to see you enjoying and coming to terms with your life…”

  “Yeah, the little I have left…”

  James fell silent. Jenny thought he was thinking on their rather philosophical discussion, but she was wrong.

  Suddenly he asked, “This afternoon, Jenny, what did you say the song was that you and Henry shared?”

  Jenny was reluctant to hurt James and yet she found herself answering James’ question. “True Love…” her words trailed off.

  “You know, I hardly ever listened to music. I wouldn’t even know the name of a song to suggest…the only time I listened to the radio was to find out how the stocks did that day. Tell me, Marjorie, do you know the words of that song…do you remember them?”

  Jenny nodded.

  “Say them to me, please.”

  Tears surfaced into Jenny‘s eyes and softly, almost in a whisper she began:

  “Well, I give to you and you give to me

  True love, true love,

  And on and on, it will always be,

  True love, true love…”

  Jenny stopped; she didn’t want to go on. She could see the hurt in James’ eyes.

  “Is there more?”

  Jenny nodded.

  “Please, say it all…”

  Jenny brushed a tear rolling down her cheek and spoke faintly again:

  “For you and I have a guardian angel on high with nothing to do,

  But to give to you and to give to me,

  Love forever true.”

  Jenny tilted her head and lifted her shoulders slightly and said, “That’s all, James.”

  James had tears in his eyes as well. “That’s a nice song, Marjorie.”

  Jenny just nodded and looked down at the book on her lap.

  “When you talked about the letters you and Henry sent to one another, was the pewter angel that you’re wearing the one he had sent to you?”

  Jenny immediately clutched the angel with her right hand hiding it from view. Once again, she just nodded.

  “What did you do with the wedding ring I gave you…throw it away?”

  Jenny looked up and turned to James, “I have it in my jewelry box at home…”

  “Would you ever consider wearing it again, Marjorie?”

  “Oh, James…” Jenny stared at James tenderly, her expression remaining neutral and then looked down at the book on her lap.

  A silence fell over the room for the longest time. Every now and then, Jenny looked over at James. He seemed to be resting peacefully.

  She could tell he was becoming more tender-hearted…Nancy saw it before she did. The day Nancy had called, she related to Jenny that she never thought she would live to see the day a Hamilton would grow soft. Jenny didn’t think so either, until today.

  She wondered when he was going to leave. It would be too painful for him to sleep in that chair all night. She was going to ask him if he needed some help to go back to his room which was downstairs. The den had been converted into a temporary bedroom for him.

  Suddenly, he spoke. Jenny had to strain to hear what he was saying.

  “I’m afraid of dying, Marjorie…I feel alone. Did you feel alone when you were sick in the hospital?”

  Jenny turned to James and said with empathy, “Yes, James, I felt alone and abandoned by everyone; even God. But I really didn’t believe that…I was tired of being sick and in so much pain and couldn’t see the sense in any of it. It came to me one day that my suffering wasn’t in vain…it’s part of life and the cross we must bear and can all be offered up to God. It all makes sense, James, if you believe. I am so happy to see you reading the Bible and getting to know Jesus. When you fully appreciate and understand what He did for us and why, you won�
�t feel alone anymore.”

  James responded with a request that shocked her.

  “Can I sleep with you tonight…? I really am quite harmless?”

  Jenny turned to James and nodded, “Yes…”

  James kept his housecoat on and lay down next to Jenny. She slid down on the bed, placed the book on the night table and turned off the light.

  Jenny lay flat on her back while James lay on his side facing her.

  Gradually their eyes adjusted to the moonlight entering through the windows. There was enough light to make out Jenny’s silhouette. Jenny just stared towards the ceiling, hesitant to look at James. It felt awkward and yet…so right.

  “Camilla, that’s a nice name, too. And she married Henry’s son…how about that… Who does she look like, Marj?”

  “She does look a lot like me, James. We’re quite the pair.”

  “She must be very beautiful…so, that would make her J.J.’s half sister…?”

  “Yes, it would be so nice for him to meet her one day. Actually, I wrote that in my diary the day I died. That was my final wish and prayer that J.J. meets his sister.”

  James didn’t say anything for the longest moment and then he said, “And…the man who fathered Camilla, you forgave him…?”

  Jenny didn’t answer right away and then replied, “Yes, James, I did.”

  “You were doing God’s will…”

  “Yes.”

  Almost twenty minutes elapsed without either saying a further word. Jenny thought James had fallen asleep. She was going to turn over away from him and try to sleep as well when she faintly heard James’ weeping.

  She didn’t know what to do.

  “Marjorie,” James softly began, “I’m so sorry for hurting you all those years, please…please, forgive me…I was such a damn fool…”

  James’ words pierced her heart. She turned over and faced him with tears in her eyes as well. She reached out and put her arm around him and drew him close to her.”

  As soft as a feather, she whispered…

  “I forgive you, James…”

  Chapter Seventy Five

  Henry tossed and turned for well over two hours and knew that he would never find sleep. He might lose the love of his life and he wondered how he could possibly cope if that happened. The clock on the bedside end table read 3:15 Father Engelmann would be awake, probably reading his breviary. Henry had planned to see him first thing in the morning, but he could no longer wait. He had to speak to his mentor; his heart ached too much.

  Henry decided to drive down to the prayer house. The sound of the truck would alert Father that he was coming rather than just walk in without warning. He marveled that Father had no fear in staying down there alone. So many nights, the coyotes would howl and work themselves into a frenzy if they downed a deer or caught a rabbit. There wasn’t any light on in the prayer house as Henry pulled up beside. He got out and made his way to the deck. The sky was beginning to lighten in the east. The sun was slowly approaching and gradually filling the valley with warm light. In all the time he owned the prayer house, only one other time was he there this early. It was to capture the morning light on the pond and how it lit up one side of the valley. It was a study he wanted to do for a painting. It made him recall his art instructor who used to take him outdoors to paint first hand.

  “In the same way,” thought Henry aloud, “twilight is such a special time between when the sun goes down and when the night is beginning. There is a morning twilight as well, only in reverse. Such a powerful peace fills the air.”

  Henry now understood why his mentor got up so early and why he enjoyed the early mornings as the best part of the day. Henry peeked through the kitchen window and made out a dim light. It was the light coming from a candle. Father preferred that to electrical lighting.

  Henry softly tapped on the door and entered. “Father, it’s me Henry.”

  There was no answer and Henry entered further into the living room and peeked into the bedroom. Father was in his hooded robe. He was writing into a large coiled binder. What an image to see his teacher writing under the light of candle. This is what it must have been like when his patron, Saint Francis, wrote his thoughts as well.

  There was such a strong similarity between the two.

  Everything Henry had read about Saint Francis, he saw those same attributes in Father Engelmann.

  Suddenly, Father stopped writing and looked at Henry. “What brings you here so early, Henry?”

  “I couldn’t sleep, Father, I want to talk to you. Have you read your breviary, yet?”

  “Yes, I have. I wanted to write some thoughts down before saying Mass. Is something concerning you?”

  Henry nodded. “Jenny has decided to stay longer in Ottawa, Father. James is quite ill and could go into the hospital at any time. She feels the need to support him.”

  “Yes, yes, that is understanding and compassionate of her, Henry.”

  “But Father, what if she stays permanently?”

  Father set his pen down on the table and arose. He came to Henry and placed his hand on his shoulder, “Come, let us sit by the window and watch the sun come up. Perhaps the light from the heavens will illuminate our thoughts.”

  Father and Henry made their way to the two chairs in front of the patio doors that overlooked the pond. Although it faced south-east, it was evident that the sun was already nearing the horizon. It would have to climb higher to make its way up to the hill tops. It was still too dark to notice the clouds near the horizon even though the sky above seemed clear with twinkling stars still in view.

  It was strange speaking with Father in the semi-darkness, almost like he was in a confessional booth. In a way it was like going to confession. He had to admit that he was very frustrated and some of his thoughts did reflect anger and ill will towards his adversary. Henry turned to Father, the dim light catching Henry’s concerns written all over his face.

  “It just seems there is always another problem or obstacle to surmount, Father. Jenny asked her husband for an annulment, but he refused. And really that was just a shot in the dark. It probably wouldn’t have worked anyway.”

  Henry paused and then continued, “James is adamant to have her come back and that they try again. And, like I said, Jenny decided to stay for the time being.

  “But for how long?

  “And, what if she decides to go back? Everything seemed to be working out so well after we all were miraculously returned to life…and for what? I thought it was mainly for Jenny and me to get together again!

  “I just don’t know what to think, anymore.”

  Father listened carefully, allowing Henry to express his feelings and then he responded, “I understand your frustration and disappointment, Henry. Both you and Jenny are in a very difficult situation. If Mr. Hamilton, or rather James, wants to try again, the Church will look upon that in a favourable light. Remember, Jenny did agree to marry James and I surmise that what she is struggling with is the commitment she made.”

  “But she said she was never very certain that she really loved him; that part of the attraction was that he reminded her of me…and even on the day they married, she had difficulty saying the marriage vows. She felt under so much uncertainty and pressure that she fainted.”

  “Yes, I recall you mentioned that before. It’s true that a person must be free to choose their mate. If a decision to marry is forced; the woman is pregnant, parents force the marriage, immaturity, lack of mental capacity, an annulment could be granted. There may be grounds here, Henry, but as you already noted, annulment does not come easy and is a lengthy process. In this case, it is further complicated by the reluctance of the former spouse to agree to the invalidation of the marriage. Do not get your hopes up too high.”

  “But surely if a marriage didn’t work and there was neglect or abuse, isn’t divorce the best solution?”

  “When two people vow in front of God and the Church to love and honour each other in good times and in bad,
until death do they part, what does that mean? That they can separate just like that? Yes, if abuse is present, then separation is warranted. In most cases, though, marriages break up due to unfaithfulness, immaturity, the ‘grass looks greener on the other side’ living in a fantasy world. More and more couples today are walking away from their commitment and promise to one another without even trying. It seems to me Mr. Hamilton is taking the first big step to making a marriage work; he is dying to himself.”

  “But she doesn’t love him—and, and he divorced her!”

  “Jenny is a very responsible woman and is looking at this situation very seriously even though her marriage might not have been the best. We have to assume that there was love present, at least at the beginning. True, they are divorced, but are they really?

  “I know how difficult this is for you to accept, Henry, but it may be best not to interfere. Jenny must be left free to decide.”

  The sun was just a few moments from peeking over the hills. The rays were painting the low clouds in a spectacular array of colors. For just a moment, the sight seized Henry’s full attention. The artist in him capturing its beauty and burning it into his mind. But not even the glory of the impending morning could hold his gaze for long. Instantly he returned to the reality of the moment and the heavy weight he would have to carry in the days ahead; not knowing what the future held.

  Father was better able to read his son in the growing light. His entire body language exhibited sorrow and forlornness. Perhaps he could get Henry to change his perspective.

  “Henry, look at the wedding ring on your finger and think about the oath you and Julean made to each other on the day of your wedding. As I just said, all too many these days consider their vows meaningless. There is a lack of commitment. The world is changing wherein we ourselves have become like any other commodity. If it’s no good, we throw it out and get a new one. All too many live in a fantasy world that the feeling that brought them to make their vows is gone and thus feel they are no longer in love.