Angel Promises Fulfilled

by Angel Promises Fulfilled (v5. 0) (epub)

“Love is not a feeling in the final analysis; it is a decision.

  “Couples who are married for forty, fifty, and sixty years did not always have it easy. They had their trials and I’m sure many times were ready to quit, but they didn’t because they made a commitment to love in good and bad times.

  “Marriage is a relationship in which we can grow up or stay proud and self centered and think that our spouse is no longer worthy of them. They feel they deserve better and think the grass is greener on the other side. They have failed to take this tremendous opportunity to die to themselves.

  “Just a few weeks ago, you noted how Jenny had died to herself in forgiving Peter. That through her actions, you more fully understood the Scripture in which Jesus said, ‘unless a seed dies, it cannot bear fruit.’ When a person wants the best for his partner, he looks for the good in others who God created and is more concerned for the happiness of their partner than themselves, they are then realizing their commitment to love. They will see the grass can be even greener on their side if they water it enough through acceptance, understanding, compassion and forgiveness.

  “Henry, your dear Jenny may love you with all her heart and yet, she may sacrifice it for the sake of the man she married and to keep her family together.”

  “Oh, Father, I don’t like what you’re saying or where this could be heading.”

  Henry shook his head struggling to hold back his emotions of despair.

  “I could offer you words of hope and say all will be fine, but you have to face the eventuality of what might occur. Consider this; what if Julean were still alive? For years she stayed with you despite her awareness of the love you had for your teenage sweetheart. What if James had died and Jenny suddenly came along? What would you do? Would you abandon Julean? Is your love so great for Jenny that you would now turn your back on your wife? Or, even if your marriage with Julean was mediocre, what would you do? When you stood at the altar and you and Julean exchanged vows, did you not vow to marry each other for better or worse?

  “Henry, is divorce ever an option?”

  “But if Julean and I were divorced, it would be different, Father.”

  “But what if Julean wanted you back? What if the children you both gave life to, wanted their mother and you back together? What then?”

  What Father just said struck Henry hard. It really hit home.

  “Jenny is facing such a decision, Henry. When she said, ‘I do,’ Jenny recognized that does not automatically mean that they were going to live happily ever after and that the road would be free and easy. No, she decided to love her husband and accept him even when the feelings that stung their hearts for one another faded away. Jenny planted deeper seeds and I believe it was because of her faith in God and His creation; she loved whether she felt like it or not, she accepted her husband when he was not deserving of it, she cared and showed understanding and compassion when she could have hated and spouted angry words. She stuck it out, Henry. What Jenny did for all the years that she was married was plant the seed of a love that now has sprouted. Even though her husband did not have Jenny’s faith and loving acceptance, she had Jesus at the centre of her life. I think that is what kept her centered and sustained her. Had Jenny not been planted on such a rock, her life would have been in disarray and James would have died as a lost soul.”

  “Jenny’s capacity to die to herself and see the good and potential in others, is a powerful example. That is a remarkable trait.”

  Father paused and after a long moment went on to say, “If a married couple places Jesus at the center of their marriage and truly has their partner’s best interests always at heart, the divorce rate would quickly decline. Counseling helps in marital difficulties and may help for awhile, but unless the counseling promotes to have Jesus at the centre, the struggle for all too many is too great. It draws them back to their selves and self-centeredness. We love for Christ’s sake. We obey His commandments; we live out His teachings and we need His strength and grace to do so.”

  Henry no longer spoke. He simply closed his eyes and let the rays of the sun streaming into the prayer house warm his face and soothe his spirit. If James now wanted to make amends and save his marriage, was it right for him to stand in James’ way? And what about J.J.? Henry recalled reading in Jenny’s diary how much she wanted to reconcile with her son. Henry’s stomach began to churn as he was beginning to see the other side. Should he put up a fight and try to win her…? Henry knew the deep decision Jenny was facing and his role was to simply be supportive and give Jenny the freedom to choose. Henry was realizing what it meant to love and yet he struggled against it. Father’s words that followed were not hopeful.

  “So you are free to re-marry, but Jenny isn’t. The only options are an annulment or Mr. Hamilton dies.”

  “But that’s the thing, Father!” Henry exclaimed, suddenly coming to life again. “James could outlive us all!”

  “I thought you said the man was gravely ill.”

  “He is, but he plans to have life support and a group of doctors to stand by and make sure he lives as long as necessary until a cure is developed. If life support fails, he plans to have his body frozen—”

  “What do you mean, Henry, frozen? I have not heard of such a thing.”

  “This is new to me as well, Father. Apparently scientists have developed a way to freeze one’s body at the point of death while there is still life in the brain. They still haven’t figured out how to thaw the person safely after a cure is found. However, scientists think within a year or two they shall know how to bring the body back quickly without damage to the cells or brain.”

  Father shook his head. “Mein leiber Gott, what will people think of next?”

  Father slapped his knees, startling Henry. “It is time to turn this matter over to the Lord. Let us celebrate Mass together, Henry. Let us offer up this Mass for Jenny and her family and for you and your family as well. I have said it before and you will probably hear me say it again: Trust in the Lord with all your heart and not your own understanding. Over and over, during the years, my son, you have seen how the divine providence of God works and turns all situations into good.”

  Father got up and clapped Henry’s shoulders. “Come, let us receive the Lord into our hearts, our bodies, and souls.”

  Chapter Seventy Six

  The doctors were amazed that James was able to stay home without the full care and attention provided by a hospital. Something beyond the medication he was taking must be assisting him somehow. A person in his condition with that many tumors growing within his body and travelling back and forth three times a week as an outpatient for his treatments astounded the medical profession at the General Hospital. In the next month that followed, James’ condition, although stable, demanded more vigilance. The doctors insisted that if he wanted to stay at home an attending nurse around the clock was absolutely necessary. Even though Matilda provided exceptional attention and support for her employer, a trained nurse could detect signs sooner than Matti and would be qualified to administer medical care if required.

  James finally agreed. He was adamant to beat the disease until Christmas which was only three weeks away. He wanted desperately to have one Christmas with Marjorie, J.J. and his family. Of all the memories he had of his own childhood there was only one Christmas that stood out. It had snowed heavily that year and his father had no choice but to be at home at that time. And for some reason James’ mother was there for the family as well. Perhaps it was because it was early in the day and she hadn’t started to drink yet. It was the only happy memory James had of his family all being together in front of the Christmas tree opening gifts.

  He admitted to Jenny that he had been guilty of carrying out that same pattern in their family. Within the first few years after J.J. was born, they rarely spent a Christmas together and the times they did were not very memorable.

  Could he stave off death for the next few weeks and achieve all the goals he wanted? His biggest challenge was to g
et his son on his side. He had talked to J.J. over and over during the last month but to no avail. The boy wouldn’t budge. In the weeks Jenny had been back at the Manor, J.J. would not come to visit since that day she had first arrived. Even then, he left before saying hello. Each time James spoke with his son he needed to take sedatives to keep him calm as it only aggravated his condition. Neither Matti, Jenny nor Thomas knew exactly what was ailing the boy and even in the face of the impending death of his father, J.J. was unwilling to soften his firm, hardened position.

  What was it that kept her son so cold and rigid? That was the last thought Jenny had before she drifted off into a deep sleep.

  Jenny wasn’t sure if she was dreaming or if she really was hearing a siren. She looked at the clock on the end table: 3:25 am. A flashing light coming through the windows echoed in the room.

  “What is going on?” Jenny muttered as she got up and made her way to the window. The front portion of a vehicle was visible but the rest was hidden under the canopy of the entrance to the front doors of the Manor. Just enough showed so as to partially expose a flashing light.

  It must be an ambulance.

  Jenny’s heart began to race; were they picking up James? Last week he had been deteriorating and complaining of abdominal pains. Jenny turned on the lights and quickly put on her housecoat.

  Matti was just closing the front door and Charles was making his way into the kitchen when Jenny came down to the front foyer.

  “What’s happened, Matti?” Jenny asked with concern covering her question.

  “They be taking Jim to the hospital, Jen. He’s not doing so good. The nurse called me over an hour ago. He be throwin up and in considerable pain. We tried to help Jim up but the pain be too much for the man. Best let the ambulance people tend to their business. They know how best to move an ailing man and get him to the hospital.”

  Jenny didn’t know what to say. She just stood there shaking her head. How quickly one’s condition could change for the worse. Would James make it through the day? Was he dead already?

  “Oh, Matti, I just have to get ready and go. He needs someone there… I know what it’s like…”

  Jenny quickly turned and ran up the stairs to get dressed.

  Jenny felt sorry for James as she drove to the hospital. He talked about Christmas everyday for the last week and what it would be like to have the family together. Everything now had suddenly come to a halt. Death waits for no man was a phrase that crossed Jenny’s mind but for only a fleeting moment. She quickly started to pray for James and that God would heal him. She would ask Henry to pray for James and perhaps call Father Engelmann to do so as well.

  Jenny parked her car and made her way into the front entrance of the hospital. She went to the admittance desk and asked if they might know what room James Hamilton would be in. The information had just been entered minutes ago. James was up in the I.C. ward, room 4C.

  When Jenny came up to the nurse’s station, she was informed that James was taken down to the second floor for x-rays. Jenny was instructed to sit in the waiting area and that she would be notified as soon as James was settled back into his room.

  No one was in the waiting room when she entered and sat down. There were several magazines lying on the chair next to her but she didn’t want to read. She just allowed her mind to drift over all that had happened since she came to Ottawa. She was still in awe of all the changes for the better that had been made on the estate. She had to hand it to James, when he made up his mind to do something, he forged ahead, nonstop. That was one of James’ traits that had always reminded her of Henry.

  And what about Henry; last night when they spoke he asked if she would be home for Christmas. She would love to spend her first Christmas with her daughter and her family and with Henry and his family but Jenny had family here, as well. She felt like a butterfly caught in a spider web, unable to fly in either direction. If only they all lived in the same city and this marriage problem was resolved.

  How will this all end?

  Jenny wondered what caused James pain; was it the existing tumors or a new one? She recalled only too well her bouts with the disease and how tumors can pop up just about any place in the body and even in the head. She had hoped that she wouldn’t see the inside of a hospital for a long time since her healing and release but here she was again.

  It should have been unsettling for Jenny and yet she realized this was the nature of life and how fragile it can be. Yesterday, she and James strolled through fresh fallen snow in the garden, marveling that the flowers in the Angel of Thanksgiving basket had survived the first week of the real onset of winter. Now, here today, they both were in the hospital, awaiting the prognosis and fate of James.

  Jenny shook her head; one just doesn’t know what tomorrow will bring. She was learning to take one day at time and live it to the full.

  Just then, Jenny heard a woman scream. The lady was shouting out someone’s name. Perhaps her husband, child or close friend had passed away. She would find it difficult to work in a hospital day in and day out and tend to illness and peoples hurts of all kinds…and death.

  “Excuse me, Miss Hamilton… Mr. Hamilton is settled in his room if you wish to see him now.”

  Jenny immediately stood up, “Yes, which room is he in?”

  “I will take you. Please follow me.”

  James had several monitors attached to his chest and an IV tube going to his right arm.

  “Oh, James, how are you feeling? I was so concerned about you.”

  “I didn’t think I would make it a couple of hours ago. The stomach pain was something else, Marjorie. The x-rays they just took show a growth inside of the wall of the intestinal tract. That’s why I was finding it harder to keep things down. The doctor is not certain if the growth was malignant or not. He said my regular doctor would check it out when he comes in later in the morning and decide if they want to do a biopsy at this point. Anyway, they gave me a pain killer and are feeding me with this thing…” James looked at the tube going into his arm.

  “Geez, I hate being in the hospital… I hope I can get well enough to get out of here again. I was doing okay until this damn stomach problem… maybe they can operate and remove whatever it is.”

  Jenny took the chair next to his bed and sat down. She reached for his hand and squeezed it. She knew all too well the nature of this disease and what it could do, not only physically, but mentally, emotionally and spiritually as well.

  “We’ll keep praying for you James. Hopefully, you will be out for Christmas.”

  “If only J.J. would come around. I never thought there could ever be anyone more stubborn and proud than myself. I guess it’s true what they say, ‘the apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree.’”

  Jenny smiled, “I might call him later when I get back home—”

  “Yeah, tell him I’m not doing so hot and that I would like to see him about a couple of matters. And please call Nancy as well to see if she can make it up for a visit. I would like to run a couple of things past her, too.”

  James took a deep breath and let it out slowly. Jenny could see he was beginning to relax.

  James squeezed Jenny’s hand, “It was good of you come right away, Marj. I’m glad there is still someone who cares about me.”

  “I do care for you, James, and I understand what you’re going through… I hope you continue to read the Bible, it will help you to understand things better.”

  “I know we have talked about this before, but if there is a God, surely he could have created it so there is not all this pain and suffering.”

  “He does allow suffering, James, but He is there to comfort you. Trust me, I know. Just think, James, if this illness hadn’t fallen on you, you would still be leading the life you were living. In spite of your pain, can you see how all this has drawn you closer to Him and the truth about life and what is important? It’s all part of the cross we must bear in an imperfect world, but even out of suffering comes such good. I
see a much happier James than before…”

  James tightened his lips and nodded slightly as if to agree with her.

  “The important thing is, James, that you don’t turn your back on Him. Now is the time that you need God the most. If you chose to go against Him, your pain will multiply…”

  “How is Mr. Hamilton doing?” asked a cheerful nurse as she walked into the room.

  James rolled his eyes as the nurse went to check the quantity of fluid left in the IV bag.

  “Dr. Reiner and Dr. Fritz want to examine you in a few minutes. There are also two other technicians from a Cryonics facility that wish to see you as well.”

  Turning to Jenny she continued, “You will have to wait in the waiting area. It shouldn’t take longer than a half hour.”

  “Yes, thank you.”

  As soon as the nurse left, Jenny said, “I think I will go home and freshen up. I’ll call J.J. and Nancy and tell them you are here and that you would like to see them. I will be back right after lunch.”

  Jenny smiled tenderly at James. She got up, bent over and kissed him on the cheek. “I’ll see you in a couple of hours.”

  “Thanks for coming, Marjorie…and, could you bring up Thomas’s Bible when you come back?”

  Jenny nodded, smiled and left.

  Chapter Seventy Seven

  Well now, it’s not often one sees a Hamilton lying on his back. It’s good to see you, James.”

  James turned towards the door and lifted his head slightly to see Nancy and J.J. walk in.

  “Glad both of you could come. I guess Marjorie got a hold of you?”

  Nancy sat down at James’ bedside while J.J. stood behind his grandmother. “Yes, she got in touch with both of us. I called J.J. to come and get me.”

  James looked at his son and nodded, “I’m glad you came, J.J., I want to discuss a few things with you.”

  “How are you doing, James?” asked J.J. stiffly.

  “Fine, but I would feel a hell of a lot better if you would call me Dad from now on. I don’t know how much time I have left but I’m trying hard to put our family back together again and I need your cooperation. I want to see you make up with your mother and you know how much she would appreciate it if you called her Mom as well…I can see now, half of the time we were like strangers or business associates—”