The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated)
Page 100
You shall be as a father to my youth:
My voice shall sound as you do prompt mine ear,
And I will stoop and humble my intents
To your well-practised wise directions.
And, princes all, believe me, I beseech you;
My father is gone wild into his grave,
For in his tomb lie my affections;
And with his spirit sadly I survive,
To mock the expectation of the world,
To frustrate prophecies and to raze out
Rotten opinion, who hath writ me down
After my seeming. The tide of blood in me
Hath proudly flow'd in vanity till now:
Now doth it turn and ebb back to the sea,
Where it shall mingle with the state of floods,
And flow henceforth in formal majesty.
Now call we our high court of parliament:
And let us choose such limbs of noble counsel,
That the great body of our state may go
In equal rank with the best govern'd nation;
That war, or peace, or both at once, may be
As things acquainted and familiar to us;
In which you, father, shall have foremost hand.
Our coronation done, we will accite,
As I before remember'd, all our state:
And, God consigning to my good intents,
No prince nor peer shall have just cause to say,
God shorten Harry's happy life one day!
You are right, Justice, and you have put your case well.
So still carry the scales and the sword;
and I hope your honours will increase
until you live to see a son of mine
offend you and obey you, as I did.
That way I will be able to say what my father said:
“I am happy that I have a servant brave enough
to make my own son face justice:
and I'm no less happy that I have a son
who is prepared to allow himself, in his great
position, to be judged.” You sentenced me:
and in return for that I am giving you
the sword of justice that you are accustomed to carry,
with this condition–that you use it
with the same
brave, just and impartial spirit
that you did against me. Take my hand.
You shall be like a father to me,
I shall say what you suggest,
and I will adapt my plans according to
your experienced wise advice.
And all you princes, believe me, I beg you,
my father has taken my wild passions
with him to his grave;
and I have taken on his spirit sadly
to prove the expectations of the world wrong,
to confound prophesies, and to erase
the bad opinion of those who assumed
that I am as I appeared. The tide of my blood
was devoted to frivolity until now.
Now it has turned back, back to the sea,
where from now on it will mix with the majesty there
and reflect that as it flows out.
Now I am going to summon the High Court of our Parliament,
and we shall choose the most noble advisers
that our great country can provide to make us
equal to the best ruled nation on Earth;
so that war, or peace, or both at once, can be
things with which we are acquainted and familiar;
you, father, shall lead us in this.
When the coronation is finished, we will summon,
as I mentioned before, our whole government:
and, with God endorsing my good intentions,
there will be no prince nor peer who will have any reason
to wish that God would shorten Harry's happy life by one day!
[Exeunt.]
[Enter Falstaff, Shallow, Silence, Davy, Bardolph, and the Page.]
SHALLOW.
Nay, you shall see my orchard, where, in an arbour, we will eat
a last year's pippin of mine own graffing, with a dish of caraways,
and so forth: come, cousin Silence: and then to bed.
No, you shall see my orchard, where, in an arbour, we shall eat
an apple which I grew last year, with a dish of others,
and so on: come cousin Silence: and then we shall go to bed.
FALSTAFF.
'Fore God, you have here a goodly dwelling and a rich.
By God, you've got a good expensive house here.
SHALLOW.
Barren, barren, barren; beggars all, beggars all, Sir John:
marry, good air. Spread, Davy; spread, Davy: well said, Davy.
Empty, empty, empty; we're all beggars, all beggars,
Sir John–just good air. Lay out the things, Davy,
well done, Davy.
FALSTAFF.
This Davy serves you for good uses; he is your serving-man
and your husband.
This Davy is very useful: he's both your steward and your servant.
SHALLOW.
A good varlet, a good varlet, a very good varlet, Sir John:
by the mass, I have drunk too much sack at supper: a good
varlet. Now sit down, now sit down: come, cousin.
A good servant, a good servant, a very good servant, Sir John:
I swear, I drank too much sack at supper: good
servant. Now sit down, now sit down: come, cousin.
SILENCE.
Ah, sirrah! quoth-a, we shall
Do nothing but eat, and make good cheer,
[Singing.]
And praise God for the merry year;
When flesh is cheap and females dear,
And lusty lads roam here and there
So merrily,
And ever among so merrily.
Yes, Sir! Let's all agree to
do nothing but eat, and have good times.
And praise God for the happy times;
when meat is cheap and women's sweet,
and lusty lads roam here and there
so merrily,
going along so merrily.
FALSTAFF.
There's a merry heart! Good Master Silence, I'll give you
a health for that anon.
There's a cheerful chap! Good Master Silence, I'll drink
to you for that shortly.
SHALLOW.
Give Master Bardolph some wine, Davy.
Give Master Bardolph some wine, Davy.
DAVY.
Sweet sir, sit; I'll be with you anon; most sweet sir, sit.
Master page, good master page, sit. Proface!
What you want in meat, we'll have in drink:
but you must bear; the heart 's all.
Sweet Sir, sit down; I'll be with you shortly; sweet sir, sit down.
Master page, good master page, sit down. Cheers!
What you lack in food, we'll make up for with drink:
you'll have to make do; the heart is everything.
[Exit.]
SHALLOW.
Be merry, Master Bardolph; and, my little soldier there,
be merry.
Be jolly, Master Bardolph; and, my little soldier there,
be jolly.
SILENCE.
Be merry, be merry, my wife has all;
[Singing.]
For women are shrews, both short and tall;
'Tis merry in hall when beards wag all;
And welcome merry Shrove-tide.
Be merry, be merry.
Be jolly, be jolly, my wife has everything;
for women, both short and tall, are shrews;
it's jolly in the hall when it's all men;
welcome to the Mardi Gras.
Be happy, be happy.
FALSTAFF.
I did not think Master Silence had been a man of this met
tle.
I didn't think Master Silence had this sort of thing in him.
SILENCE.
Who, I? I have been merry twice and once ere now.
Who, me? I've been jolly once or twice before now.
[Re-enter Davy.]
DAVY.
There 's a dish of leather-coats for you. [To Bardolph.]
Here's a dish of russet apples for you.
SHALLOW.
Davy!
Davy!
DAVY.
Your worship! I'll be with you straight [To BARDOLPH.].
A cup of wine, sir?
Your worship! I'll come to you at once.
A cup of wine, sir?
SILENCE.
A cup of wine that 's brisk and fine,
[Singing.]
And drink unto the leman mine;
And a merry heart lives long-a.
A cup of wine that's quick and fine,
and drink to my sweetheart;
and the jolly heart lives long.
FALSTAFF.
Well said, Master Silence.
Well said, Master Silence.
SILENCE.
An we shall be merry, now comes in the sweet o' the night.
And we shall be jolly, now the best part of the night has arrived.
FALSTAFF.
Health and long life to you, Master Silence!
Good health and long life to you, Master Silence!
SILENCE.
Fill the cup, and let it come,
[Singing.]
I'll pledge you a mile to the bottom.
Fill the cup, bring it on,
I'll drink it down if it were a mile deep.
SHALLOW.
Honest Bardolph, welcome: if thou wantest anything and
wilt not call, beshrew thy heart. Welcome, my little tiny thief
[to the Page],
and welcome indeed too. I'll drink to Master Bardolph, and to all
the cavaleros about London.
Honest Bardolph, welcome: if there's anything you want and
you don't ask for it, shame on you. Welcome, my little tiny thief [to the page],
you are very welcome too. I'll drink to Master Bardolph, and
to all the fine fellows in London.
DAVY.
I hope to see London once ere I die.
I hope to see London once before I die.
BARDOLPH.
An I might see you there, Davy,--
And I might see you there, Davy–
SHALLOW.
By the mass, you'll crack a quart together, ha! will you not,
Master Bardolph?
By God, you shall split a quart of ale together! Will you not,
Master Bardolph?
BARDOLPH.
Yea, sir, in a pottle-pot.
Yes, sir, two quarts.
SHALLOW.
By God's liggens, I thank thee: the knave will stick by thee, I
can assure thee that. A' will not out; he is true bred.
By God, I thank you: this scoundrel will stick with you, I
can promise you that. He won't go missing, he's well bred!
BARDOLPH.
And I'll stick by him, sir.
And I'll stick with him, sir.
SHALLOW.
Why, there spoke a king. Lack nothing: be merry.
[Knocking within.]
Look who 's at door there, ho! who knocks?
Why, spoken like a king. Lack nothing: be merry.
Go and see who's at the door there! Who's knocking?
[Exit Davy.]
FALSTAFF.
Why, now you have done me right.
Why, you toasted me well there.
[To Silence, seeing him take off a bumper.]
SILENCE.
Do me right,
[Singing.]
And dub me knight:
Samingo.
Is't not so?
Do the same for me.
And make me a knight:
Samingo.
Isn't that it?
FALSTAFF.
'Tis so.
That's it.
SILENCE.
Is't so? Why then, say an old man can do somewhat.
It's right? Why then, say an old man can still do something.
[Re-enter Davy.]
DAVY.
An't please your worship, there 's one Pistol come from the
court with news.
If you please your worship, there's a man called Pistol,
from the court with news.
FALSTAFF.
From the court? Let him come in.
[Enter Pistol.]
How now, Pistol!
From the court? Let him come in.
Hello there, Pistol!
PISTOL.
Sir John, God save you!
Sir John, God save you!
FALSTAFF.
What wind blew you hither, Pistol?
What wind drove you here, Pistol?
PISTOL.
Not the ill wind which blows no man to good. Sweet knight,
thou art now one of the greatest men in this realm.
Not the ill wind which blows no man any good.
Sweet knight, you are now one of the greatest men in the kingdom.
SILENCE.
By'r lady, I think a' be, but goodman Puff of Barson.
By Mary, I think you might be, apart from the yeoman Puff of Barson.
PISTOL.
Puff!
Puff in thy teeth, most recreant coward base!
Sir John, I am thy Pistol and thy friend,
And helter-skelter have I rode to thee,
And tidings do I bring and lucky joys
And golden times and happy news of price.
Puff!
Puff through your teeth, you low-down coward!
Sir John, I am your Pistol and your friend,
and I have ridden here helter-skelter
to bring you happy news of
golden times, profitable times.
FALSTAFF.
I pray thee now, deliver them like a man of this world.
Well please, tell me about them like an ordinary man.
PISTOL.
A foutre for the world and worldlings base!
I speak of Africa and golden joys.
Damn ordinary and ordinary men!
I'm talking of Africa and golden fortunes.
FALSTAFF.
O base Assyrian knight, what is thy news?
Let King Cophetua know the truth thereof.
You low Assyrian knight, what's your news?
Let King Cophetua hear it.
SILENCE.
And Robin Hood, Scarlet, and John. [Singing.]
And Robin Hood, Scarlet and John.
PISTOL.
Shall dunghill curs confront the Helicons?
And shall good news be baffled?
Then, Pistol, lay thy head in Furies' lap.
Shall the dogs of the dungheaps confront the Muses?
Shall good news be treated with contempt?
Then, Pistol, give yourself up to the Furies.
SHALLOW.
Honest gentleman, I know not your breeding.
Honest gentleman, I don't know your background.
PISTOL.
Why then, lament therefore.
Well then, you should be sorry for it.
SHALLOW.
Give me pardon, sir: if, sir, you come with news from the
court, I take it there 's but two ways, either to utter them, or
conceal them.
I am, sir, under the king, in some authority.
Excuse me, sir: if, sir, you have come with news from me
court, I assume there's only two things you can do, say it, or
hide it.
I do have a position of some authority, sir, under the king.
PISTOL.
Under which king, Besonian? speak, or die.
Under which King, ign
oramus? Speak, or die.
SHALLOW.
Under King Harry.
Under King Harry.
PISTOL.
Harry the Fourth? or Fifth?
Harry the Fourth? Or Fifth?
SHALLOW.
Harry the Fourth.
Harry the Fourth.
PISTOL.
A foutre for thine office!
Sir John, thy tender lambkin now is king;
Harry the Fifth's the man. I speak the truth.
When Pistol lies, do this; and fig me, like
The bragging Spaniard.
Your office is now worthless!
Sir John, your little lamb is now King;
Harry the Fifth is the man. I'm telling the truth.
When I lie you can make rude gestures
to me like the bragging Spaniard.
FALSTAFF.
What, is the old king dead?
What, is the old King dead?
PISTOL.
As nail in door: the things I speak are just.
Dead as a doornail: it's the truth.
FALSTAFF.
Away, Bardolph! saddle my horse. Master Robert Shallow,
choose what office thou wilt in the land, 'tis thine. Pistol, I
will double-charge thee with dignities.
Off you go, Bardolph! Saddle my horse. Master Robert Shallow,