The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated)

by William Shakespeare

  We are as true as flesh and blood can be:The sea will ebb and flow, heaven show his face;

  The sea will ebb and flow, heaven will show his face;Young blood doth not obey an old decree:

  Young blood does not obey an old decree:We cannot cross the cause why we were born;

  We cannot continue to defy love, the reason we were born;Therefore of all hands must we be forsworn.

  So we must inevitably break our vows.FERDINAND What, did these rent lines show some love of thine?

  What, did these torn verses show some love of yours?BIRON Did they, quoth you? Who sees the heavenly Rosaline,

  Did they, you ask? Who sees the heavenly Rosaline,That, like a rude and savage man of Inde,

  That, like a rude and savage man from India,At the first opening of the gorgeous east,

  At the first dawning of the gorgeous east,Bows not his vassal head and strucken blind

  Does not bow his subordinate head and stricken blindKisses the base ground with obedient breast?

  Kiss the lowly ground with his obedient chest?What peremptory eagle-sighted eye

  What bold eye, keen as an eagle,Dares look upon the heaven of her brow,

  Dares look upon the heaven of her brow,That is not blinded by her majesty?

  That is not blinded by her majesty?FERDINAND What zeal, what fury hath inspired thee now?

  What crazy madness has gotten a hold of you now?My love, her mistress, is a gracious moon;

  My love, her mistress, is a gracious moon;She an attending star, scarce seen a light.

  She is just a star attending to her, a light that can scarcely be seen.BIRON My eyes are then no eyes, nor I Biron:

  Then my eyes are not eyes, and I am not Biron:O, but for my love, day would turn to night!

  O, without my love, day would turn to night!Of all complexions the cull'd sovereignty

  Of all complexions that are deemed most worthyDo meet, as at a fair, in her fair cheek,

  They meet, like at a fair, in her beautiful cheek,Where several worthies make one dignity,

  Where several excellences make on supreme example of beauty,Where nothing wants that want itself doth seek.

  Where nothing lacks that desires itself seeks.Lend me the flourish of all gentle tongues,--

  Lend me the eloquence of all noble tongues,--Fie, painted rhetoric! O, she needs it not:

  Ugh! Artificial rhetoric! O, she doesn’t need that:To things of sale a seller's praise belongs,

  A seller’s praise belongs to things for sale,She passes praise; then praise too short doth blot.

  She is above praise; any praise of her is inadequate and detracts from her beauty.A wither'd hermit, five-score winters worn,

  And hermit, withered by five years of winter,Might shake off fifty, looking in her eye:

  Might shed fifty years by looking in her eye:Beauty doth varnish age, as if new-born,

  Beauty polishes age, as if new-bornAnd gives the crutch the cradle's infancy:

  And give the crutch the infancy of a cradle:O, 'tis the sun that maketh all things shine.

  It is the sun that makes all things shine.FERDINAND By heaven, thy love is black as ebony.

  By heaven, your love is black as ebony.

  BIRON Is ebony like her? O wood divine!

  Is ebony liker her? O divine wood!A wife of such wood were felicity.

  A wife of that wood would be pure happiness.O, who can give an oath? where is a book?

  O, who here can swear me to an oath? Is there a bible around?That I may swear beauty doth beauty lack,

  So that I can swear that beauty isn’t beauty at allIf that she learn not of her eye to look:

  Unless she learns what beauty is by looking at Rosaline:No face is fair that is not full so black.

  No face is pretty that isn’t so fully black.FERDINAND O paradox! Black is the badge of hell,

  That’s a paradox! Black is the color of hell,The hue of dungeons and the suit of night;

  The hue of dungeons and the cloak of night;And beauty's crest becomes the heavens well.

  And yet you assert that your black-eyed beauty is heavenly.BIRON Devils soonest tempt, resembling spirits of light.

  The devil’s temptation comes in the form of an angel of light.O, if in black my lady's brows be deck'd,

  Of, if my lady’s eyes are dressed in black,It mourns that painting and usurping hair

  It’s because they mourn that painted and false hairShould ravish doters with a false aspect;

  Would drive her suitors crazy for her with a false appearance;And therefore is she born to make black fair.

  And so she is born to make black beautiful.Her favour turns the fashion of the days,

  Her face alters the fashion of the days,For native blood is counted painting now;For a natural ruddy complexion is what women paint themselves to look like now;

  And therefore red, that would avoid dispraise,

  And so red, which wants to be praised,Paints itself black, to imitate her brow.

  Paints itself black to imitate her.DUMAIN To look like her are chimney-sweepers black.

  Chimney sweeps are also trying to look like her.LONGAVILLE And since her time are colliers counted bright.

  And because of her, coal miners are called bright.

  FERDINAND And Ethiopes of their sweet complexion crack.

  And Ethiopians boast of their sweet complexion.DUMAIN Dark needs no candles now, for dark is light.

  No one needs candles anymore, since dark is now light.BIRON Your mistresses dare never come in rain,

  Your mistresses would never dare to be out in the rain,For fear their colours should be wash'd away.

  Afraid that all the painted colors on their face will get washed away.FERDINAND 'Twere good, yours did; for, sir, to tell you plain,

  It would be good if yours did; I’ll tell you plainlyI'll find a fairer face not wash'd to-day.

  Even unwashed faces are prettier than hers.BIRON I'll prove her fair, or talk till doomsday here.

  I’ll prove to you that she is beautiful of talk here until doomsday.FERDINAND No devil will fright thee then so much as she.

  No devil with scare you on doomsday as much as she will.DUMAIN I never knew man hold vile stuff so dear.

  I’ve never know a man to hold something so vile with such affection.LONGAVILLE Look, here's thy love: my foot and her face see.

  Look, here’s your love: my foot is her face, see?BIRON O, if the streets were paved with thine eyes,

  O, if the streets were paved with your eyes,Her feet were much too dainty for such tread!

  Her feet would walk so daintily as to never hurt you!DUMAIN O, vile! then, as she goes, what upward lies

  O, gross! Well then as she walked, if my eyes areThe street should see as she walk'd overhead.

  the street I’ll be able to see up her skirt as she walks above me.FERDINAND But what of this? are we not all in love?

  But what now? Aren’t we all in love?BIRON Nothing so sure; and thereby all forsworn.

  There’s no doubt about it; we’ve all broken the oath.FERDINAND Then leave this chat; and, good Biron, now prove

  Then let’s quit chatting; and, good Biron, now proveOur loving lawful, and our faith not torn.

  That our love is lawful, and that our faith is not torn.DUMAIN Ay, marry, there; some flattery for this evil.

  Yes, that’s right; we need some flattery for this evil.LONGAVILLE O, some authority how to proceed;

  O, some authority on how to proceed;Some tricks, some quillets, how to cheat the devil.

  Some tricks, some verbal niceties and distinctions, to cheat the devil.DUMAIN Some salve for perjury.

  Some ointment for this broken oath.BIRON 'Tis more than need.

  It’s more than need.Have at you, then, affection's men at arms.

  I come at you with this, then, love’s warriors.Consider what you first did swear unto,

  Consider what you first swore to,To fast, to study, and to see no woman;

  To fast, to study, a
nd to see no woman;Flat treason 'gainst the kingly state of youth.

  That is flat treason against the kingly majesty of youth.Say, can you fast? your stomachs are too young;Tell me, can you fast? Your stomachs are too young;

  And abstinence engenders maladies.And abstinence causes sicknesses.

  And where that you have vow'd to study, lords,And whereas you have vowed to study, lords,

  In that each of you have forsworn his book,Inasmuch as each of you have forsworn his lady’s face,

  Can you still dream and pore and thereon look?

  Can you still dream and read and look at it?For when would you, my lord, or you, or you,

  Because when would you, my lord, or you, or you,Have found the ground of study's excellence

  Have found the basis of study’s excellenceWithout the beauty of a woman's face?Without the beauty of a woman’s face?From women's eyes this doctrine I derive;

  From women’s eyes I have obtained this principle;

  They are the ground, the books, the academes

  They are the ground, the books, the schools

  From whence doth spring the true Promethean fire.From which Prometheus’ divine fire springs.Why, universal plodding poisons up

  Why, universal working and trudging poisonsThe nimble spirits in the arteries,

  The nimble spirits in the arteries,As motion and long-during action tires

  Since motion and long-enduring action tiresThe sinewy vigour of the traveller.

  The fibrous energy of the traveler.Now, for not looking on a woman's face,

  Now, by not looking at a woman’s face,You have in that forsworn the use of eyes

  You have, in doing so, forsworn the use of the eyesAnd study too, the causer of your vow;

  And study too, the whole reason for your vow;For where is any author in the world

  For what author in the whole worldTeaches such beauty as a woman's eye?

  Teaches as much beauty as a woman’s eye?Learning is but an adjunct to ourself

  Learning is merely an addition to ourselvesAnd where we are our learning likewise is:

  And, likewise, our selves are an addition to our learning:Then when ourselves we see in ladies' eyes,

  So then, when we see ourselves in our ladies’ eyes,Do we not likewise see our learning there?

  Do we not also see our learning there?O, we have made a vow to study, lords,

  O, we have made a vow to study, lords,And in that vow we have forsworn our books.

  And in that vow we have forsworn our books.For when would you, my liege, or you, or you,

  For when would you, my liege, or you, or you,In leaden contemplation have found out

  In heavy contemplation have found outSuch fiery numbers as the prompting eyes

  Such fiery verses as the prompting eyesOf beauty's tutors have enrich'd you with?

  Of beauty’s tutors have enriched you with?Other slow arts entirely keep the brain;

  Other slow branches of knowledge dwell inside the brain;And therefore, finding barren practisers,

  And so, since we do not practice or use them,Scarce show a harvest of their heavy toil:

  They barely show any harvest of their heavy toil:But love, first learned in a lady's eyes,

  But love, first learned in a lady’s eyes,Lives not alone immured in the brain;

  Does not live alone confined in the brain;But, with the motion of all elements,

  But, with the motion of all the elements, fire, earth, water, and air,Courses as swift as thought in every power,

  Flows as swift as thought in every power,And gives to every power a double power,

  And gives every power a double power,Above their functions and their offices.

  Above and beyond their ordinary functions.It adds a precious seeing to the eye;

  It adds more precious seeing to the eye;A lover's eyes will gaze an eagle blind;

  A lover’s eyes will out-gaze an eagle;A lover's ear will hear the lowest sound,

  A lover’s ear will hear the lowest sound,When the suspicious head of theft is stopp'd:

  Even when the most cautious thief hears nothing:Love's feeling is more soft and sensible

  A lover’s senses are more soft and sensitiveThan are the tender horns of cockl'd snails;

  Than the tender little feelers on shelled snails;Love's tongue proves dainty Bacchus gross in taste:

  Love’s tongue proves dainty Bacchus distasteful:For valour, is not Love a Hercules,

  For bravery, isn’t Love a Hercules,Still climbing trees in the Hesperides?

  Still climbing trees in the Hesperides?Subtle as Sphinx; as sweet and musical

  Subtle as a Sphinx; as sweet and musicalAs bright Apollo's lute, strung with his hair:

  As bright Apollo’s lute, strung with his own hair:And when Love speaks, the voice of all the gods

  And when Love speaks, the voice of all the godsMakes heaven drowsy with the harmony.

  Makes heaven sleepy with such beautiful harmony.Never durst poet touch a pen to write

  Never has a poet dared touch his pen to writeUntil his ink were temper'd with Love's sighs;

  Until his ink is mixed with Love’s sighs;O, then his lines would ravish savage ears

  O, then his lines would ravish savage earsAnd plant in tyrants mild humility.

  And make tyrants humble.From women's eyes this doctrine I derive:

  From women’s eyes I have obtained this principle:They sparkle still the right Promethean fire;

  They still sparkle with the divine fire;They are the books, the arts, the academes,

  They are the books, the arts, the schools,That show, contain and nourish all the world:

  That show, contain, and nourish all the world:Else none at all in ought proves excellent.

  Otherwise nothing at all would be excellent.Then fools you were these women to forswear,

  You were fools to forswear these women,Or keeping what is sworn, you will prove fools.

  Or if you keep to what you swore, you will prove to be fools.For wisdom's sake, a word that all men love,

  For the sake of wisdom, a word that all men love,Or for love's sake, a word that loves all men,

  Or for the sake of love, a word that inspires all men,Or for men's sake, the authors of these women,

  Or for the sake of me, the authors of these women,Or women's sake, by whom we men are men,

  Or for the sake of women, without whom we would not be men,Let us once lose our oaths to find ourselves,

  Let’s just this once, lose out oaths to find ourselves,Or else we lose ourselves to keep our oaths.

  Or else we lose ourselves to keep our oaths.It is religion to be thus forsworn,

  It is religion to be forsworn like this,For charity itself fulfills the law,

  For the Bible says that charity itself fulfills the law,And who can sever love from charity?

  And who can separate love from charity?FERDINAND Saint Cupid, then! and, soldiers, to the field!

  For saint Cupid, then! And now, soldiers, to the field!BIRON Advance your standards, and upon them, lords;

  Raise your flags and march, lords;Pell-mell, down with them! but be first advised,

  Attack them with reckless abandon! But make sureIn conflict that you get the sun of them.

  That you get them with the sun in their eyes.LONGAVILLE Now to plain-dealing; lay these glozes by:

  Let’s get down to business; lay these fallacies aside:Shall we resolve to woo these girls of France?

  Are we going to decide to woo these girls from France?FERDINAND And win them too: therefore let us devise

  And win them too: so, let us planSome entertainment for them in their tents.

  Some entertainment for them in their tents.BIRON First, from the park let us conduct them thither;

  First, from the park we will take them there;Then homeward every man attach the hand

  Then on the way home every man seize the handOf his fair mistress: in the afternoon

  Of his fair lady: in the af
ternoonWe will with some strange pastime solace them,

  We will comfort them with some strange pastime,Such as the shortness of the time can shape;

  Whatever that short amount of time will allow;For revels, dances, masks and merry hours

  For revels, dances, masks and cheerful hoursForerun fair Love, strewing her way with flowers.

  And beautiful Love will run ahead, paving the way with flowers.FERDINAND Away, away! no time shall be omitted

  Come on, let’s go! No time to wasteThat will betime, and may by us be fitted.

  We need to take advantage of every minute.BIRON Allons! allons! Sow'd cockle reap'd no corn;

  Come on, come on! If you only plant weeds you’ll get no wheat;And justice always whirls in equal measure:

  And justice always divvies in equal portions:Light wenches may prove plagues to men forsworn;

  Frivolous girls may prove to be plagues to men that are forsworn;If so, our copper buys no better treasure.

  But beggars can’t be choosers.Exeunt

  Enter HOLOFERNES, SIR NATHANIEL, and DULL

  HOLOFERNES Satis quod sufficit.

  Enough is as good as a feast.SIR NATHANIEL I praise God for you, sir: your reasons at dinner

  I thank God for you, sir: your discourses at dinnerhave been sharp and sententious; pleasant without

  Have been sharp and moral; pleasant withoutscurrility, witty without affection, audacious without

  Obscenity, witty without affection, fearless but withimpudency, learned without opinion, and strange with-

  Respectfulness, educated without arrogance, and novelout heresy. I did converse this quondam day with

  without heresy. I did converse the other day with a companion of the king's, who is intituled, nomi-

  a companion of the king’s who is titled, named,nated, or called, Don Adriano de Armado.

  Or called Don Adriano de Armado.HOLOFERNES Novi hominem tanquam te: his humour is lofty, his

  I know the man as well as I know you: his attitude is lofty, hisdiscourse peremptory, his tongue filed, his eye

  Conversation imperious, his tongue polished, his eyeambitious, his gait majestical, and his general

  Ambitious, his walk majestic, and his generalbehavior vain, ridiculous, and thrasonical. He is

  Behavior vain, ridiculous, and boastful. He istoo picked, too spruce, too affected, too odd, as it