by Alex Riordan
“They’re on the counter. And…the park sounds lovely,” she set her book down, closing it. “I’ll go get ready.”
Chapter 26
Jessie arrived at the dojo by eleven fifteen. Unlocking the front door, she pushed her bike through and left it in the back room, out of sight. As she stepped out of the room, she noticed that a few students were just arriving. Saying hello to them, she went into the office and flipped on the lights, checking to see if Jing had left any notes for her. Not finding any, she pulled on her jacket and tied her belt around her waist. No time to warm up before class began, she sighed.
Stepping back out into the dojo, she called the class to order and got started. Beginning with a warm up consisting of stretches, she moved them into an easy cardio workout. The first class consisted of children who ranged in age from six to ten, so she couldn’t work them too hard. That didn’t mean that she went easy on them, she just didn’t push them. The goal at this age was to teach them focus and work on their coordination, not fighting, per se.
When the class was warmed up, she began by going over jabs and front snap kicks. Later, she would have them spar for ten minutes, and then finish up the class. When the class finished, not only on time, but without any of the kids getting punched too hard and crying, she wrapped it up.
At three thirty, she had finished up the adult class, and was busily putting equipment away, when Master Jing walked in.
“Jessie…”
She turned when she heard her name. “Master Jing.” She hurriedly straightened up and bowed to the Master in respect. “I thought you wouldn’t be in today?”
“I finish early so I can be here with you,” the older man said, pulling on his own jacket and tying his belt. “Come with me, Jessie. We have lesson today.”
Jessie quirked a brow, but said nothing. Following Jing back out onto the mats, she caught the escrima sticks that he tossed to her and waited. When he bowed to her, she bowed back and took up a fighting stance. Within minutes, they were sparring at full speed. Jessie’s skill with the fighting sticks more than rivaled Jing’s, so their fight wasn’t really a close match. Still, the older man managed to disarm Jessie and pin her to the floor.
Staring down at her, Jing shook his head. “You have no focus today, Jessie.”
“I’m sorry, Master Jing.” Jessie said breathlessly. “I have no excuse.”
“Many things happen this week in your life,” the old man continued. “These things affect you.”
Jessie averted her eyes, refusing to meet his gaze. “I’m fine,” she insisted.
Jing took a deep breath. He knew all too well that Jessie wasn’t fine. “Stand up and prepare to fight.”
Jessie did as she was told, taking up the fighting stance once again. This time, however, Jing had her fighting for her life within seconds, surprising her for the first time in years. Blow after blow landed, causing bruises on her legs and left arm. And, if she weren’t mistaken, some bruised ribs, as well. Not sure what was happening, she found herself backpedaling, attempting to get in under her master’s defenses. Jing was too good though, and before Jessie knew it, she was on the floor again.
Jing looked down at her again. “You fight without balance or focus, Jessie. Your mind is not here today.”
“Master Jing…”
“No. You will listen to me now. Sit up.” When he saw that Jessie had obeyed him, he continued. “I know what happened to your love. Is she okay?”
Sitting on her knees, Jessie looked down and then back up at him. She really didn’t want to talk about Stephanie’s attack, but she could not refuse to speak to Jing. This was his dojo, and she, his student. At the very least, it would be disrespectful. And, he was a surrogate father to her as well. Swallowing hard, making herself speak, she answered, “Aside from some cuts and bruises, she’s okay. I got there before he could…do anything more.”
“And yet, cuts and bruises heal. An attack like this leaves other scars, Jessie. For her and you,” Jing said, watching her carefully. “You stopped him?”
Jessie nodded. “Yes. I got there before he could…” she shook her head, her defenses crumbling around her. “I was so scared, Master. When I saw him on top of her…and she was bleeding…I almost killed him, Master. I would have…if Theresa hadn’t been there.” Jessie stopped talking and hung her head, hiding a tear that had managed to escape. Dammit! She’d worked hard to push all this down. Stephanie needed her to be strong for her, not sit around and cry.
“You cannot change what happened, Jessie,” the old man said kindly.
Jessie shook her head, sniffing. “I know that. I just wish…”
“Wishing will not make it so, and therefore is a waste of time. You are full of anger about what happened, Jessie. You must release this to regain your balance and focus. Stand up.”
Jessie did as she was told, standing up and preparing to fight once more. Jing took up a stance and said, “Fight with emotion, Jessie. Allow yourself to feel whatever you feel at the moment.”
“Master Jing, you’ve always said to fight with emotion is weak? Emotion causes lack of focus,” Jessie argued, surprised that Jing would tell her to do the opposite of what he’d always said before.
“In emotion you can find your strength, Jessie. I have never told you not to feel…only to not allow your feelings to control you,” Jing said as he attacked once more.
Again, Jessie found herself fighting a losing battle. Then, through the haze her mind seemed to be in, she heard Jing’s voice saying, “He attacked the one you love. He cut her, bruised her. He tried to take that which was not his to take. He tried to take it from both of you. She gave her love to you, Jessie, and he tried to take it.” Hearing those words, already emotional from the events of the past week and her need to be there for Stephanie, she began to lose all control. Seeing red, she began attacking Jing with everything she had. No longer Jing in front of her, she saw Bob, attacking Stephanie yet again. Screaming in anger and pain, Jessie no longer fought with any kind of focus.
Jing found himself backpedaling now, holding Jessie back but allowing her to work through her pain at the same time. Swinging the fighting sticks in a flurry, he was able to parry every swing, but just barely. Still, when Jessie suddenly spun and threw the escrima sticks past him at the wall, shattering as they hit, he stopped. Jessie had dropped to her knees on the mat, howling in pain; a primal scream that came from the depths of her very soul. Then, when the screaming was over, she dropped her head into her hands, sobbing and shaking.
“I can’t…” she couldn’t say anything else. There were no words for how she felt.
Jing dropped to his knees in front of her. “I understand your pain, Jessie. But you cannot be strong all the time. You must be strong for each other. Help each other through this.”
“I’m trying, Master. But I…” she managed to stutter out through her sobs.
“Do you love her?”
She nodded, eyes still downcast. “Yes, Master. With all my heart and soul,” she said, the words coming out more of a whisper than anything else.
“She will be leaving soon, will she not?” he asked.
“Yes.”
“Then you must work to find balance with her before she goes,” he told her. “She will need you when you are apart, Jessie. And…you will need her. Without balance, you cannot be there for each other.” Jing stood up and moved away from her, looking toward the observation area and nodding slightly. “Stay here, Jessie. Our lesson is over, but Bao Yu would like to speak to you.”
Jessie nodded, but said nothing else. Still shaking and sobbing, she wiped at her face and waited for Bao Yu to come to her. This was not the first time she’d had a lesson like this. She was quite familiar with Jing’s teaching methods. Still, there was nothing like having a lesson taught via 2x4.
When Bao Yu arrived next to her, she didn’t look up. She knew the other woman was there. Her quiet demeanor and the peace that emanated from the other woman was a physical presen
ce that had always comforted her. Keeping her head bowed, Jessie waited for her to speak.
Looking down at Jessie, head bowed and sniffing quietly, Bao Yu felt her heart go out to her. Reaching out to stroke her hair tenderly, she said, “Jing teaches hard lessons. But they are important.” Jessie nodded in acknowledgement, and she went on. “Jing and I understand pain, Jessie. You know this. He is correct when he tells you that you cannot blame yourself.”
“I know,” Jessie answered, tears still streaming down her face. She was still holding her left arm, where one of Jing’s sticks had made contact. She was sure the bruise was bone deep. “It just hurts so much, Bao Yu. She needed me, and I…”
“You got to her in time, Jessie. She lives, still.” She sat down crossed legged across from Jessie and caught her hands in her own. “You love her very much. Jing and I are pleased that you have found your ‘One.’ We have waited long for you to find someone to share your gifts with. Stephanie is very special.”
Jessie nodded, looking at her and smiling slightly through her tears. “She is, isn’t she?”
“She loves you, Jessie,” Bao Yu smiled back at her, taking the younger woman’s chin in her hand. “Let her love you and hold you when you need it. Do not be afraid to need, my American Daughter. It is a sign of strength that you can admit it. Do you understand?”
Jessie nodded. “Yes. I understand.”
“Good.” She stood up, brushing Jessie’s hair with her hand once more. “She is waiting for you. I will send her out. Come find me when you are ready and we will heal your bruises.” She walked away then, waving toward the observation area and leaving Jessie looking bewildered. She’d had no idea that Stephanie was there.
Chapter 27
Stephanie and her mother had spent the afternoon at the park, walking the paths and talking about everything that had happened since she’d come to Ohio. Nancy was still worried about her daughter, but Stephanie seemed to be doing better today, regardless of the scene in the studio the night before. She had only broken down and started crying once, when she talked about how she felt for Jessie. It seemed that Stephanie had fallen hard for the brunette. And, if she were honest, Nancy could see why Stephanie was attracted to her. Jessie was intelligent, well-educated, talented, gorgeous, and strong. She also had a great job and her own money. She obviously had no interest in Stephanie’s celebrity or her money, either. And, the most important thing, she was kind and loving toward Stephanie. That alone, made Nancy feel good about their relationship.
It had started to sprinkle while they were headed back to the car. By the time they got the doors open, it had turned into a downpour. Taking refuge inside the Xterra, they sat and dried off with an old towel Jessie had tossed in the back seat. Laughing, Stephanie fastened her seat belt and threw the SUV into gear, heading for Jing’s Martial Arts School.
It was a few minutes before three, when Stephanie and Nancy arrived at Jing’s school. Walking in the front door, they walked directly into an area which faced out toward the dojo. Enclosed in glass facing out toward the dojo itself; Stephanie was slightly puzzled at first, until one of the parents leaned over and explained to them that the glass was actually a two way mirror. Jing knew that the parents liked to watch their children in class, but it kept the children from focusing properly knowing that someone was watching them. So, rather than have the distraction, he created the room as sort of a compromise. The parents could even hear what was being said to the children, due to mics installed in the dojo.
Taking a seat, they watched as Jessie finished the final class of the day. While they were there, Bao Yu came in and took a seat between them, watching as well. When the class was over, Stephanie was ready to go out and greet Jessie, but Bao Yu caught her hand, keeping her in place.
“Wait. Jing is here and wishes to give Jessie a lesson,” the woman told her kindly.
“What kind of lesson?” Stephanie asked. “I thought Jessie was a black belt and didn’t need any more lessons?”
Ah…Every martial artist learn for entire life. But Jing not teach martial art lesson today. Today, he teach life lesson. You have been watching the class?” she asked.
Stephanie nodded, slightly confused. “Yes. Jessie’s a good teacher.”
“Yes. But she is unfocused and out of balance today. Jing asked her to teach today so that he could observe.” She looked at Stephanie and squeezed her hand. “What happened to you has affected Jessie more deeply than she will ever tell you. She does not even know how deeply she is affected. Jing knows Jessie well, and is worried for her.”
At Bao Yu’s words, Stephanie felt the tears welling up again. She’d been so needy and caught up in her own pain over what had happened, she’d forgotten to think about how it might have affected Jessie.
Seeing the tears in the redhead’s eyes, Bao Yu reached around and hugged her. “Do not blame yourself. This is Jessie. She has always been this way, taking on other’s pain; though she admits none of her own. Watch…you will see. Jing is going to teach her to feel.”
“But? Doesn’t she already feel?” Stephanie was becoming more confused by the minute. She’d been spending plenty of time with Jesse the last few weeks, and she seemed to be feeling just fine to her. Then again, maybe she just didn’t know Jessie well enough yet to be able to judge for herself.
“Jessie has plenty of feelings. But she does not acknowledge them, she push them down and ignore. Jing understands this about her,” Bao Yu explained. She looked at both, Nancy and Stephanie. “Jessie has a great capacity for love, but fears it, also. Jing and I are very happy that she has found you, Stephanie, and wish for the two of you to have long happy life together.”
Taking a deep breath and wiping her eyes. Stephanie smiled at Bao Yu and squeezed her hand in return. The older woman’s words had touched her deeply, and she wanted her to know it. Wiping her eyes, she forced herself to stay put and watch as Jing took Jessie out onto the mats. Stephanie had been trained in a few different styles of martial arts for different movies she’d been in, but never anything near what she witnessed watching Jessie and Jing. At first, it was like watching one of those Chinese martial arts movies. Both of them moved with a fluidity and grace that Stephanie found enthralling. Then, Jing knocked Jessie down, and stopped to talk to her. When they began the fight again, there was no more grace and fluidity, only anger and rage, and Jessie ended up on the floor again.
Stephanie found herself crying once more, hearing what Jing said to Jessie. She desperately wanted to run out there and hold the brunette; to let her know that she didn’t need to feel guilty about what had happened. Then, as they began fighting again, she watched in horror. First, as Jing hit Jessie repeatedly with the fighting sticks. Jessie was doing her best to block, but Jing was just too good. His blows were slipping past Jessie’s defenses almost as if Jessie were moving in slow motion. Then, she watched in terror, as Jessie lost control and screamed, throwing the sticks across the room and causing them to break on the wall. When she fell to the floor shaking and sobbing, Stephanie jumped up, intending to go to her, but Bao Yu held her back.
“No, you must stay here and let Jessie learn.” She too, had tears in her eyes, but Stephanie knew that the woman trusted Jing not to hurt Jessie. It took everything in her not to go anyway, when Bao Yu went out to speak to Jessie. Still, she sat and listened to what the woman said; waiting until she could go to her and wrap her arms around her and make everything okay.
* * * *
Bao Yu left Jessie and walked back to the observation room. Stephanie and Nancy were both on their feet, worried about the brunette. Nancy was holding Stephanie, who was crying into her shoulder. When Bao Yu walked in, she looked at Nancy. “Your daughter must go to Jessie now. You can come with me and we will talk.” When Nancy hesitated, she said kindly, “Jessie is okay. Jing teach hard lesson, but love her very much. Now is time for Stephanie and Jessie.”
Nancy wiped a tear from her own eye and hugged Stephanie again, encouraging her. Letting he
r go, she said, “Make sure she’s okay, Steph. I’ll be here if you need me.”
Stephanie couldn’t wait to get to Jessie. Breaking away from her mother as soon as Nancy let her go, she ran out of the room. When she got to Jessie, she dropped to the floor. “Jess…!”
Jessie was still on her knees, arms wrapped around herself, shaking. Her arm hurt, her leg…her ribs were bruised. Everything hurt, and yet…the physical pain didn’t compare to the mental and emotional pain she was in. Anger and guilt were crushing her. Still, when she heard Stephanie’s voice…felt herself being pulled into her arms…
Jessie fell against her shoulder, sobbing and shaking. “S…Steph…I’m s…sorry. I never wa…wanted you to…get hurt.”
“Jessie,” her voice came out as a breathless sob itself. “You aren’t responsible for what happened. Shh, I’ve got you. I’m sorry…I didn’t see that you were hurting, too.”