by Julian Bloom
“He was at Hope Home.”
“And his name is Jake.”
“Yes, Father.”
“He’s that little black bastard that ran away about the time you went to college. Your mother warned me that there was something wrong with that one. I wouldn’t believe her. I should have put two and two together! What a way for him to repay our generosity! I’m going to call a lawyer. There must be some way to prevent this. I’ll pay him off if nothing else. And as for you,” he said in a slow monotone, “Get out of my sight and stay there.”
Reggie, shaking like a leaf hid in his room and wept. But eventually, he began to be elated that he’s actually carried it off. He hadn’t been sure he could.
His father did try to stop the marriage, and did try to pay Jake off but under severe pressure from his other two children and especially his wife, he caved in. They persuaded him that the scandal would be worse if he refused to participate than if he at least pretend to like it. They pointed out that several movie stars had come out as gay, and even mentioned a couple in his circle whose children had done so too. And so he acted out the role of a proud father at the wedding. But the breach with his son was never repaired.
*
The ship left Vancouver, cruising up Johnstone strait, and Jake persuaded Reggie that it would be cool to dine on their balcony and watch the sun set over Vancouver Island, and so avoided another confrontation with Glenda.
The next day as the liner cruised up the Inner Passage with its spectacular views of mountains on either side, Jake wanted to continue to avoid Glenda. He was aided in this by Reggie’s desire to sample the delights of the sauna and massage room, so after refusing breakfast, they spent most of the morning on Deck 14, ate lunch at the poolside grill on Deck 12, before taking a nap until dinner time. Both of them were just a little bored with the scenery which was endlessly spectacular but not very varied, and decided to take in “Extravaganza in Blue” in the liner’s theatre after dinner.
They dined as early as possible, which Jake hoped vainly would avoid Glenda. He felt harassed even when she was nowhere near, and drank rather more wine with dinner than usual to try to help him relax. Jake had led Reggie to a table for two against the wall to prevent her from joining them, but his heart sank as he caught sight of her waving her fingers at them, and in a few minutes she was at the table engaging them in conversation. Reggie was unfailingly polite in every situation and kept up their side of the conversation while Jake simply stared as rudely as he dared, trying to blot out the conversation. He deliberately gave her what he thought of as an objective assessment. Though her clothes were garish, not meeting the standards he had learned from Reggie and the amount of jewelry and makeup excessive, she was not unattractive. Somewhere underneath was a body of pleasing proportions and in better condition than that of most women of her age. He reflected that he had bedded much worse in his street days. Whether or not he was preparing himself for what he assumed was inevitably coming, it was certainly subconscious. His days as a professional were over, he was sure, and he soon stopped his appraisal and concentrated on his food instead.
Chapter7 The Unwelcome Proposition
After the show, which was spectacular, lavishly costumed and professionally performed, they stopped for a night cap at the Shooter’s bar adjacent to the theatre. Unfortunately, at dinner, Reggie had said they were engaged that evening in response to an invitation from Glenda to join her in her stateroom for a drink, and when pressed, had to admit that they were taking in the show. Unsurprisingly, Glenda turned up at the bar and slid onto the stool next to Jake. After a few moments, Reggie excused himself to go to the men’s room. Jake wanted to stop him, but couldn’t think of a way how. After all, though Reggie had no liking for Glenda, he had no idea how much Jake loathed her or why.
Glenda wasted no time. “How do you like being somebody’s pet?”
“I’m not!” Jake bristled.
“What are you going to do when he drops you?”
“He won’t. He loves me.”
“Well right now, he may, but forever? Do you have any mad money of your own or is he keeping you?”
“I am his partner and we’re in love.”
“Listen, I can read you like a book. You were on the street, weren’t you?”
Jake shook his head violently and said, “Never!” But somehow his voice revealed the truth.
“I thought so. Listen, I’m hot for your beautiful body. I’ll pay handsomely for some time with you. Very handsomely. Wouldn’t you like to have some cash stowed away for the future? What would happen to you if he was killed in a car crash? Back on the street. Or simply got tired of you? Five thousand bucks would make a difference, wouldn’t it. Think about it.”
“Never!” he hissed. “Not with you. Not with anybody!” And he downed the rest of his drink and managed to connect with Reggie just outside the restroom.
“Reggie, startled, asked, “What’s wrong?”
“I couldn’t stand another moment of that bitch!”
“I don’t blame you; she’s tiresome, but basically harmless.”
“In that, my love, you are very very mistaken. Let’s go to bed.”
Reggie was puzzled, but saw that Jake wasn’t going to elaborate, so simply took his arm and walked with him to the elevators.
…
When they got inside the suite, Jake threw his arms around Reggie’s waist. “Tell me you love me.”
“I love you.”
“Tell me you’ll always love me.”
“I’ll always love you. What’s wrong? In what way can I show you that I love you that I haven’t already used?” Reggie lifted Jake up and kissed him deeply.
“It doesn’t matter that I’m black?”
“Of course it doesn’t matter that you’re black.”
“It doesn’t matter that I was a street boy?”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“It doesn’t matter that I’ve never been even to secondary school?
“My God! Of course it doesn’t matter. What do you think? I’ve known everything about you practically since I met you. If it mattered, I would have made it clear years ago.
“You don’t know everything.”
“I know there’re things that happened before came to Hope House that you don’t want to talk about. That’s OK. I’m passionately in love with you Jake, and if you don’t believe me, you’ll hurt my feelings.”
Jake buried his head against Reggie’s chest and sobbed. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry! It just seems too good to be true.”
Reggie kissed away Jake’s tears and led him over to the bed. He undressed Jake slowly, and tucked him in tenderly like a parent tucking in a child. It wasn’t a moment for lust. It was a moment for love. He undressed and lay down behind Reggie and just held him as they drifted off to sleep on the wings of Bacchus. Later, much later, when they both awoke, there was passion – slow, tender, gentle passion that could be relished at length just for itself and ever so gradually reached an appropriately gentle climax that left them both fulfilled and ready for sleep again.
Jake did his very best to just lock Glenda out of his mind. He wanted to trust Reggie totally, which he managed part of the time. He was as sure as any human could be that Reggie meant what he said. But the memory of his life before Reggie never faded entirely. The product of a Russian sailor and an African American sex worker, his early life had been dire. He hadn’t been wanted, but both parents did their best for him. His father, especially, was affectionate and supportive. But then when Jake was four, his father just disappeared. Jake never knew why. His mother, left to raise him alone, couldn’t cope and eventually just abandoned him when he was ten. He never saw either of them again. Left to make his own way, he was victimized and raped not only by predatory men, but casually by boys he thought were his friends. The plant of trust withered and died in him. Hope Home planted new seeds and some sprouted. And eventually he learned to trust Reggie, but it was always fragile.
&n
bsp; Glenda had known just how to spear him. He was completely dependent on Reggie. He had no funds, no resources, no skills that would be useful if Reggie just left him on the dock when the cruise was over. He was a junior partner in the relationship. Reggie was always in control. No matter how gentle, accommodating and sensitive he was, he was still in control. Jake might be a well-loved toy boy, as he believed he was, but he was still a toy boy. And he didn’t like that.
Five thousand bucks was a lot of money. And if he understood Glenda, it was for a once only proposition. What difference would it make to his marriage if Reggie never learned about it? Lots of married men had one night stands and believed it wasn’t important, that it didn’t betray their wives or make any difference to their marriages. Sometimes they caught an S.T.D. and passed it on to their wives, which was disaster, but Jake couldn’t really envisage Glenda as a S.T.D. vector. Surely not. And of course sex with Glenda wouldn’t mean anything at all any more than the sex he’d had with the women on the street had. It was strictly commercial. It had nothing to do with him and Reggie. Surely!
It would mean some deception, of course, but nothing that mattered.
Chapter 8 The Unexpected Resolution
Jake pondered how he was going manage a time and place for an assignation with Glenda and how was going to let her know what he had decided. For the latter, he decided a note was easiest. He knew Juan could deliver it. For the former, he remembered that the next day, the Star Princess would arrive at Ketchikan. If he and Reggie went on a tour of the old city, which he wanted to do anyway, he’d have a change for a quick word with Glenda to make a plan. He was still irresolute and his doubts came flooding back, but he squashed them. The next morning, before Reggie woke up, he wrote a note to her – hurrying lest he lose his nerve, suggested the Ketchikan plan, and rang for Juan, meeting him outside the door. Juan gave him a sharp look, but as Jake assumed, knew where Glenda’s cabin was and agreed to deliver the note to her there immediately.
Meeting them at breakfast, she gave Jake a wink and a nod and suggested that they meet to go together on the Ketchikan tour. Reggie grimaced at Jake showing he wasn’t at all keen, but to Jake’s relief agreed after a small pause.
When the time came, they embarked together. The Stedman Thomas Historical Area, the “old city” was similar to the “Old West” tourist sections of many western and far western cities. There were the usual sorts of historic buildings and gift shops. The setting, between the sound and the mountains was particularly scenic, though, and the old red light district, Creek Street, was particularly charming, perched mostly on piles over the water. There were also the north-western Indian sites, which particularly interested Reggie, who bought a pint-sized totem pole and shipped it home. As they moved in the crowd between places of interest, Glenda managed to get Jake alone and simply whispered, “My cabin tonight at midnight,” using her body to mask a quick grope of his buttock. When Reggie noticed them talking he moved to rescue Jake, but Glenda outmanoeuvred him by inviting them both to drinks and a film in her cabin after dinner. Reggie ever polite, saw no way of refusing, and to Jake’s despair, agreed.
When the time came, however, Jake recognized the cleverness of Glenda’s ploy, because she was so insistent about offering them the most tempting of drinks: Johnny Walker Blue Label, Laphroigh Select, and genuine Chartreuse, and always poured Jake less than Reggie so that by the time the film ended – even before it ended, in fact, Reggie was practically comatose. When Jake escorted him back to their suite, he was almost instantly asleep. It was 11:30pm, so Jake took a short shower and headed for Glenda’s cabin.
…
The closer he got to it, the slower he walked – a fierce debate going on in his head. He tried to block thoughts of Reggie out, but failed. He tried to persuade himself that what he was about to do would made no difference to his marriage with Reggie, but failed. He rehearsed in his mind the numerous commercial encounters he had with women, unsatisfying but lucrative and mercifully brief, and tried to convince himself that this one was going to be just the same. But he couldn’t dismiss the thought that this was different because he was in love with – and married to - Reggie.
He stood before Glenda’s door for a full two minutes before he knocked, intending to call it off face to face. But when Glenda opened the door, dressed in a chiffon negligee that revealed all her charms – and all her lack of charm – she grabbed him, pulling him inside over to the bed where she proceeded to unzip his fly, pull out his package, and begin vigourously to lick it.
But then what Jake always thought of later as a miracle happened. He totally failed to respond, something that had never happened to him before. There wasn’t even a melting in his groin. He remained as flaccid as a boiled noodle. Glenda didn’t give up easily, but nothing availed. Finally she grabbed his hand and rubbed it against herself until she came. “Get out! You miserable little black bastard.” Get out! She dragged him, as he clutched his undone trousers in one hand, out the door.
Just before she opened it, he gasped, “You promised me money!”
“You promised me sex,” she replied as she shoved him out and slammed the door behind him.
Jake dealt with his clothes and made his way back, trying to figure out whether he was upset or elated. But by the time he reached their suite, and cuddled in the bed with Reggie, he was sure. He had been rescued and taught a lesson. He whispered, I love you. I love you, Reggie,” in Reggie’s ear, and Reggie woke just enough to whisper back, “I love you too, Jake,” before going under again.
Chapter 9 The Happy Ending
The rest of the cruise was lovely, the landscape dramatic and picturesque, and the cities interesting. Reggie and Jake especially enjoyed the visit to Glacier Bay National Park, where the glaciers, though steadily shrinking, were stunning. Reggie and Jake took full advantage of the many entertainments and facilities the Star Princess offered, and thankfully, Glenda left them entirely alone except for an occasional sulfurous look at Jake when she could catch his eye. But by the time they were nearing San Francisco, they were ready to go back to their real lives and started planning for Reggie’s return to U.C.L.A. Jake had decided that he wanted to register for at least some classes – just one or two at a time, for coping with university classes without even a secondary education would be difficult. Reggie was enthusiastic about the idea and even suggested that Jake take a beginning Modern Dance class, which Reggie suspected he would excel at.
On the last evening of the cruise, they opted to finish as they had started with dinner on their balcony overlooking the California coast. They ordered a sumptuous dinner with a starter of bay scallops fried in butter and served with a lemon and saffron sauce, followed by a pasta with clam and French fennel. The main course was oxtails which had been marinated and then simmered over a very low heat in a rich tomato, garlic and tamarind marinade. They finished the meal with a chocolate and orange mousse drizzled with Mulanje Gold. Juan and Reggie consulted about the right wine for each course, and then, when everything was ready and had been rolled in under covers, Reggie opened a bottle of sparking red wine, which both he and Jake preferred to champagne, and holding hands drank a celebratory toast for a most successful cruise and towards a most successful marriage.
Glasses downed, they embraced and kissed affectionately and were tempted to let things develop romantically, but Reggie suggested that it would be a shame to let the food grow cold, and Jake thought it would be a pity to miss the light of the setting sun on the high Sierras, so they decided there was no hurry. They had many sexual adventures on the cruise, exploring each other’s bodies and tastes, and though not in the least tired of it, were free from urgency about it.
So when the last spoonful of chocolate had been savored, and the sunset had faded into dusk, Reggie turned to Jake and asked, “Happy? “
“Can you doubt it?” replied Jake.
I gather you managed to turn your back on Glenda’s charms … or was it her money that tempted you.”
/> Jake, having had no idea that Reggie had figured out what Jake’s momentary discombolation had been about, was stunned. “Who told you about that? That bitch?”
“Nobody needed to tell me anything,” replied Reggie. “All that was needed was a bit of observation, a little bit of knowledge of you.”
“You never said anything.”
“Nothing needed to be said. I trusted you then, and I trust you now.”
“I am luckier than any human deserves,” said Jake, looking deep into Reggie’s eyes, “and I will never forget it.”
Then they rose from the table, pushed the trolleys into the passageway, and headed to the bed to make love in a leisurely and deeply moving manner, knowing that there was no need to hurry and that half of pleasure is anticipation, savoring each moment of the stately dance. They removed each other’s clothes, taking it in turn and making sure to minister to the part of the body uncovered in turn. Circling towards the center of things, they were careful not to raise the tension too rapidly. A gentle sucking here, a slow and languorous licking there, pauses for words of admiration and love they strolled towards the familiar crest of the hill, hearts entwined as bodies entwined, until knowing intuitively when it was time, they assumed the age old position for mutual tongue ministry, and brought each other to a mighty explosion that had breasts panting and hearts racing, and explosion to which every synapse contributed, a deep and mighty explosion in which two bodies and two souls were united in that glorious union which nothing can equal and for which there is no substitute.
In the early morning, as the Star Princes steamed under the Gold Gate Bridge, Reggie and Jake contemplated the future, not without knowledge that there would be problems, but with the confidence that they would meet them and overcome them together.
The End