Just Breathe Trilogy Box Set

by Martha Sweeney

  As the boys debate who gets to jump first, I fling my body off the rock that sits at least twenty feet above water level. I get an instant wedgie. Swimming out of the way, I join Maggie sitting on a protruding rock that is about ten feet away from the water’s edge.

  “Out jumped by a girl!” Jimmy shouts. “You boys should be ashamed of yourselves.”

  I smile at my triumph and his praise.

  At some point, I slide back into the water and help Sadie up on the rock after watching her swim around it twice. Jared comes to visit and soak in the sun.

  “How are you doing from last night?” Jared checks.

  “Okay . . . hanging in there,” I share.

  “You drank a lot. You had me a little worried,” he admits with concern in his tone. “You haven’t drank like that in a long time.”

  “I know. Sorry. I’m okay. From what I remember, Joe was a gentleman. He took care of me,” I offer.

  “No dream?”

  “Nope,” I lie successfully.

  “Good.” he praises.

  “Did I get bad?” I question tentatively.

  I know he’ll tell me the truth.

  “No. What do you remember?”

  “Not much after coming out of the bathroom with you,” I admit.

  “You’re not losing her, you know,” he encourages.

  “Yeah,” I disjointedly reply, not believing him.

  “We’re gaining a brother,” he rationalizes. “And, perhaps over time, some nieces and nephews.”

  “Don’t go there yet, please,” I beg.

  Laying my head on his shoulder, I search for some information that I’m not sure I want the answers to. “Can I ask you something?”

  “Of course, Kitten. What is it?”

  “This stays between us,” I command.

  “Of course,” he genuinely agrees. “Is something or did something happen between you and Joe?”

  “What? No.” I smoothly lie. “Why would you ask that?”

  “It would be a natural, normal thing that could happen,” he explains.

  “Don’t. Please don’t,” I plea.

  Worry about starting this conversation has fully erupted in me.

  “Okay. Sorry. What is it?”

  “I don’t remember anything after we toasted to Henry and Maggie other than dancing,” I quietly announce scrunching my face.

  “We all danced. You stayed a bit away from Maggie and Henry, but we all did for the most part. They were in their own little world by that point. When we left, you road with Nathan, Joe and me. Joe and I took you back to your room and Joe offered to assist you if you needed it. I knew you’d be fine after taking the charcoal. That shit works pretty good on you,” he describes.

  “So I didn't say or do anything out of the ordinary?” I check.

  He thinks. “Not really. I know you and Joe joke around a lot and you did a bit before we left as well as in the car ride back.”

  “What made us leave?”

  He laughs. “You and Joe were joking and you dogged him, claiming that he was trying to sleep with you.”

  “Sounds about right,” I agree.

  “Was he trying?”

  “I don’t remember, honestly.”

  Jared doesn’t need to know the real truth behind that statement, or else I’ll need to be explaining a lot of things, which I’m not interested in doing.

  “Anything else you need to know, Kitten?”

  Uncomfortably, I mutter, “Joe claims that I kissed him.”

  “What?!” he gasps loudly, forcing me to punch him. “Ow. Sorry. I deserved that. So, did you?”

  “I don’t know,” I report truthfully.

  “Well, he’s a handsome man . . . has the hots for you, and it has been a while for you since, you know,” he nonchalantly comments. “Too bad.”

  “Too bad, what?”

  “Too bad you don’t remember. Maybe you can get some action out of the situation regardless,” he teases.

  “No. Hell no. You know my rules,” I sternly press.

  “Yeah, yeah. I know.” Jared wraps his arm around me, holding me tight. “That doesn’t get rid of the most likely possibility that he actually does like you more than we think and that he might try at some point. What’s not to like with a woman like you? You’re smart, beautiful, funny . . . you love to do things and make your own money.”

  I shake my head, opposing his statement to end the discussion. Jared chuckles at my expense.

  We continue hiking and exploring for the rest of the afternoon enjoying the sights, sounds and peace. With our bellies grumbling, we elect to find somewhere to feast. One of the locals recommends a restaurant called Mama’s Fish House which is on our way back to the hotel.

  Maui’s first fresh fish restaurant, Mama’s Fish House is nestled in a coconut grove on a secluded white beach. The building emulates old Polynesian style from the wood floor and walls as well as the original artwork that hangs inside. Jimmy’s and Allen’s faces beam with excitement for the art and inquire of the waitstaff for more information. Looks like they might be bringing some Hawaiian flair to their art gallery back in New York.

  Everyone orders something different for appetizers and entrees so we can each have a bite of the fresh delicacies. The chef was pleasantly amenable to create a fresh, uncooked plate for Sadie.

  Laughter and jokes swell from our table and out past the outdoor porch, where we’re sitting in the quaint restaurant. Nothing like great food and great people to celebrate a wonderful vacation as the sun begins to set.

  “So . . .” Jimmy strikes conversation back up after we’ve all had a few mouthfuls of our entrees. “I want to know wedding details!”

  The pit of my stomach twists and my appetite vanishes instantaneously. I lower my fork to my plate and swallow a large gulp of my Ulupalakua Framboise Raspberry Wine that was made right here in Maui. The day was going so well until now.

  “Yeah! Do you know who your bridesmaids will be?” Allen eagerly adds.

  “Well, Emma as maid of honor, of course,” Maggie immediately announces.

  My eyes widen and I try to smile my excitement for being named the maid of honor and the fact that we’re talking about Maggie’s wedding already.

  “Then Jared, Nathan, Amy and Kim,” Maggie continues.

  “Who’s Amy and Kim,” Jimmy questions.

  “My cousins.”

  “You sure that will work?” Nathan questions.

  “Why?” Maggie asks.

  “Most people aren’t used to seeing men as bridesmaids,” explains Jared. “I’m happy to do it because I love you, but people might give some odd reactions when they see Nathan and me standing on your side.”

  “So. It’s my wedding, not theirs. If they don’t like it, then they don’t have to come,” Maggie asserts.

  Everyone laughs at her honest declaration.

  “Anything to make my sister happy!” Jared chimes in.

  “Is Jared really your brother?” Allen explores.

  “Emma and Jared are family. We aren’t blood, but that doesn’t make them any less family in my eyes. They’ve been my family for the last eight and a half years,” Maggie explains.

  Jared and I blush at her announcement. I love Maggie and the genuine relationship she’s shared with Jared and me. That’s what makes her getting married so hard for me.

  “Who’s the best man, Henry?” Jimmy pries.

  “Joe, of course,” he says without hesitation. “He’s like a brother.”

  “Well, that pairing works with Emma being maid of honor,” Jimmy points out. “But, you’ll need to consider who the next two will be given that they’ll be paired with Jared and Nathan. If they aren’t gay, you’ll need two heterosexual men who are completely comfortable with their own sexuality and won’t mind escorting them.”

  “Well, since I don’t have any brothers and I hardly see any of my cousins to be close to them like Maggie is with her’s, I guess then next in line could be you and Allen
,” Henry states.

  “Seriously! Oh my God!” Jimmy shouts. “This is going to be the best wedding ever!”

  “Have you guys picked a location or date yet?” Allen continues.

  “Shit guys, they just got engaged last night. I think they need some time to talk about it,” I pronounce before taking another large sip of my wine and completely emptying the glass.

  “Maggie does have her wedding binder. Remember, Emma?” Nathan reminds.

  Crap. I almost forgot all about her picture binder.

  Since she was sixteen, Maggie has had visions of grandeur when it comes to planning her wedding day. The weekend after we popped each other’s cherries, she showed it to me. Then a small book, now a three ring binder full of years worth of photos and ideas of her ideal wedding with everything planned down to the last detail, minus the date and the groom. The groom changed each time she dated a guy or had a crush on a movie star. I know that Henry’s face is now tapped on the shoulders of the groom’s body she has next to her’s in a mock wedding photo.

  “A what?” Jimmy inquires.

  “She’s basically been planning her wedding since before Emma and I meet her,” Jared informs. “The only two things that were always tentative was the wedding date and the actual groom. If she wanted too, she could have her entire wedding in two or three months given that at least one of her desired venues has an opening.”

  “That’s a great idea!” Henry comments.

  “What is, honey?” Maggie questions.

  “Let’s get married at the end of the summer, in the beginning of August, before my last year of MBA classes begin. We can take a short honeymoon and then an extended one during the winter season.”

  My eyes glaze over at Henry’s words. What the hell? Is he really serious? I know he has the money to pull it off. There’s no doubt there. Can Maggie handle that? Can their families handle that? Can I handle that?

  “Here,” Jared offers handing me his glass.

  “Thanks,” I mutter, then finish the last half of his Mai Tai.

  Shock consumes me and lingers through the rest of dinner. I have trouble focusing on comments regarding wedding things so I simply nod in agreement to anything Maggie directs my way. Jared whispers that he’s taking mental notes and will fill me in when I’m in a better state. I nod appreciatively as I stuff my face with food since there is nothing left to drink other than water.

  My anxiety lessens when the waitress returns with another glass of wine for me. I instruct her to bring another one in exactly ten minutes. Without judgment, she smiles and agrees. I continue to stuff my face and drink until I literally have no room left.

  On the rest of the drive back to the hotel, I’m grateful not to be in the same vehicle as Maggie and Henry. Jared and Nathan joined them to assist with my needed distance until my mind settles and can accept and move forward with the events that have taken place the past two nights.

  Instinctually while driving, Joe takes my hand to comfort me.

  “Oh my God. I knew it,” Jimmy blurts. “I knew something was going on between the two of you.”

  “It’s not what you think,” Joe firmly comments in a serious tone.

  “Yes there is. Why else would you be holding her hand?” Jimmy contends.

  His words snap my attention back to reality and I instantly pull my hand away.

  Joe reaches over and takes my hand before replying, “Emma has trouble being in cars.”

  “What kind of trouble?” Jimmy gently presses.

  “The bad kind,” Joe informs with a stern tone.

  Joe’s defensiveness surprises me, especially since it’s directed towards his brother. I’m surprised he has never mentioned my issue with cars to Jimmy, especially after having the nightmare at his home just before we came here.

  Not liking the tension I have caused and how long it’s lingering in the car, I share. “My parents died in a car accident.”

  “Oh my . . . I’m sorry, Emma,” Jimmy apologies.

  “Me too. We didn’t know. Joe didn’t tell us,” Allen sheepishly adds.

  “It’s not my business to tell,” Joe defends.

  “It’s okay,” I assure all of them. “They didn’t know and . . .” my voice trails off.

  “It’s okay, Emma. We understand,” Jimmy consoles. He and Allen both reach forward and place their hands on my shoulders which helps.

  Back in the suite, I opt to change into my swimsuit and head to the beach for an early evening swim. Even with all of the hiking, my body craves more strenuous activity to relax the tension and help me sleep. I plan on sleeping through the night — no more bad dreams. The guys from my suite join me, though Jimmy and Allen choose to get a few drinks at the bar first. As we settle at a casabella lounger on the Beachwalk, Jared and Nathan join us too.

  Peeling off my sweater and shorts, I braid my hair back and then run to the water. Sadie follows me, but quickly returns to the guys, too tired to swim out and join me. Sometime later, after enjoying the night swim alone, I head back to my friends. I curl up with Jared and Nathan on one of the extra long chairs as Joe, Jimmy and Allen sit side by side on the other facing us. We all talk and laugh as the night moves on until Jimmy and Allen turn in first. Jared and Nathan follow about twenty minutes later while Joe and I decide to wait a little before returning to our rooms. We’re not interested in walk in seeing or hearing anything.

  Once Jared and Nathan are out of sight, Joe slides over to my chair to snuggle. He claims it’s to keep me warm because my hair is still wet. He adds that it’s better to be sandwiched between him and Sadie than just Sadie alone. I disagree with his statement knowing his intentions, but I don’t argue with him. There is a little, cool breeze and I’m grateful for the warmth of his body.

  Soaking in the heat of each other’s body, Joe starts to massage my shoulders. “I think we should schedule a massage after zip-lining tomorrow,” he suggests.

  “Why?”

  “You’re really tense.” He presses harder on a knot and I moan out of pain and pleasure wrapped together. “See,” he confirms.

  “I won’t need a masseuse at the rate you’re going,” I praise, not wanting him to stop.

  “Careful, beautiful. Don’t tempt me,” he sinfully teases.

  “What?” I innocently plea.

  “You know what I mean.”

  Moving his hands, Joe finds another knot in my back causing me to whimper with delight.

  What feels like ten minutes later, as his hands glide down to my lower back, my upper body is like putty and it curls back into his chest. Keeping my eyes shut, I relish his touch, not wanting it to end. Over time, my consciousness fades in and out as the sound and feel of his steady breathing and the ocean in my ear lulls me.

  “Emma?” he whispers.

  “Hmm,” I breathe out.

  He tilts my face closer to his. “Emma. You asleep?”

  “Not yet. Soon,” I mumble.

  “Let’s head inside.”

  “No,” I whine.

  “Why not?”

  “Feels good,” I acknowledge.

  He chuckles lightly and wraps his arms around me tighter. “Five more minutes.”

  “Okay,” my voice slurs.

  I must have fallen asleep because my eyes fling open at the threat of being kissed again. “I’m up. I’m up,” my voice retorts groggily.

  We return to a quiet and peaceful suite. Sadie passes out on my bed before I start getting ready to turn in for the night. My eyes flutter under the warm shower, informing me that mental and physical exhaustion are approaching. I quickly dry off, brush my teeth and dress as my body staggers to stay standing. Concern increases at the thought of repeating last night, so I get the gumption up to talk to Joe. His bedroom door is open, but I knock lightly to be sure I don’t catch either of us off guard.

  “It’s open.”

  I take a reluctant step in.

  “Hey,” he says upon seeing me and puts his book down.

  �
�Hey,” I return.

  “You okay?”

  “Yeah . . .” I timidly reply.

  “What’s wrong?” The worry in his voice has risen. He gets up from the bed and takes a few steps towards me.

  “Nothing . . . just . . . .”

  How do I ask him?

  “I was wondering . . . if . . .” my voice trails, searching for the right words to ask without sounding dumb. “Would you mind sleeping in there . . . or here . . . with me tonight?”

  “Of course,” he immediately agrees.

  Leading me by the hand, Joe turns the light off in his room, closes the door and takes us both back to mine. Seeing a knocked out Sadie on my bed, Joe laughs and quietly shuts the door before turning off the lights.

  We climb under the covers, snuggling right into each other.

  “Thank you,” I mention.

  He brushes his knuckles across my cheek. “I’m here anytime you need me.”

  “I just don’t want to lead . . .” his lips sweep across mine before I finish. My mouth seeks more of his. “Joe,” I breathe in with our lips still touching.

  He strokes my face again, “You don’t ever have to worry about that.” He lowers his mouth to mine again.

  I’m too tired to fight. Mentally and physically, I’m wiped.

  “Joe,” I whimper again as the memory of me kissing him last night emerges.

  “I know,” he announces connecting his lips to mine. “Just friends.”

  I nod in agreement as we sweetly explore each other’s mouth. Taking a breath, I repeat, “Just friends.”

  “Mmm hmm,” he agrees, pulling me back into him.

  We kiss a few more times as my body and mind are officially met with exhaustion.

  Kissing my temple, he says, “Emma.”

  “Hmm,” I mutter.

  “Looks like I owe you a song on the piano.”