by Emma Easter
For a long moment, neither of them could take their eyes away from the other. He looked down at the table. Keep your wits about you, he cautioned himself. Just because she knew now that he was single didn’t mean they should lose their heads. Besides, he was leaving tomorrow. Nothing could ever happen between them; definitely not now, and maybe never.
When he looked up into her eyes again, she was still looking at him, and he knew without a doubt that she had different ideas from him. Unlike him, she was interested in pursuing a relationship. He couldn’t think straight. Under different circumstances, he would have wanted that too, but as it was, it wouldn’t be possible.
“How have you been coping with just you and the kids?” she asked.
He shrugged and pretended that the way she was looking at him now, coupled with the feel of her hand in his, was not slowly stealing his senses. With as much nonchalance as he could, he said, “I’m doing okay, I guess. For now, our housekeeper also acts as the nanny.”
As soon as he said the words, he regretted them. He had offered her a job as a nanny for his kids, but now he knew it was not the best idea for her to come back to California with him. He groaned inwardly at the conflicting emotions he felt — that he’d been feeling since the day he’d met her at the store.
On the one hand, he wanted her to remember the job offer and tell him that she would accept it, but on the other, he did not want that. He wanted to do what Rachel had told him to do. He wanted to keep his promise to Josh and to his late wife. And he wanted to prevent the disaster that was sure to happen if Lily went back to California with him.
Her friend Sofia began to talk about a mutual acquaintance of hers and Lily’s. At first, he politely listened, and then his mind strayed back to his present dilemma.
The waiter arrived with their food, and the three of them tucked in. Sofia asked him what he did for a living, and he tried to explain his job as best as he could but with as few words as possible. He didn’t really feel like talking.
“So, the apartment you bought for Lily. You fully furnished it. I have to say, you’re a very generous man.”
Taylor shrugged. “I don’t know about that. I’ve known Lily since we were kids. She needed my help, and I tried to help with what I could. I’m sure she would have done the same for me if I were in her shoes.”
Sofia chuckled and glanced at Lily. “I’m sure she would have.”
He looked at Sofia’s plate and arched his brows, surprised. She had almost finished her meal. And it had been a large one.
She glanced at her wristwatch and said, “I have an emergency. I have to go.”
“What emergency?” Lily raised her brows and stared at her friend with a suspicious look on her face.
Taylor smiled in amusement.
Sofia stood. She bent down briefly to give Lily a kiss on her cheek and then gave her a mischievous smile. She turned to Taylor. “It’s been nice getting to know you, Mr. Dalton.” She looked down at Lily and smiled. “Now you be a good girl... but not too good. I’ll see you later.” She grinned and glanced at Taylor. “Have fun, you kids.” She strode away.
Lily called out to her, but she didn’t answer. She groaned and bit her lip. She seemed frightened, and Taylor frowned. She murmured something and finally faced Taylor fully.
An awkward silence stretched out between them as they ate. Lily picked at her food, and Taylor intermittently glanced at her while he ate. It occurred to him that the reason she seemed frightened was because her friend was gone; the friend that had been here to act as their chaperone. He searched his mind, trying to come up with a conversation that would put her mind at ease, or at least help her forget her fears. He finally remembered his phone conversation with Rachel and looked at Lily. “I have some news about Fallow Creek.”
She looked at him with a quizzical expression on her face, but she also looked slightly afraid. “What is it?”
“Something huge happened there.”
The panic disappeared from her face, replaced by concern.
“I finally called Rachel, and what she told me blew me away.”
Lily gazed intently at him. Her lashes fluttered as she fixed her gaze on him, causing his heart to do the same. He ignored his fluttering heart and went on. He told her everything Rachel had said to him, from her and Keith’s arrival at Fallow Creek to finding out that her grandfather had been the true founder of the town and that she was the owner now. He told her that Dennis Hamilton had murdered Rachel’s father and about the confrontation with Dennis. He talked about the kidnapping and the supernatural flood and mudslide that had swept Dennis and several of the squad members into the river at the edge of Fallow Creek.
She listened with eyes as big as dinner plates. Her eyes were fixed on him, her mouth slightly open. When he’d finished, she shook her head slowly. “Unbelievable! How have things changed so quickly within the past ten months since I left? Wow! I wish I’d been there to witness all that. So Dennis Hamilton is gone, and your sister is now the leader of our community?”
Taylor nodded.
“Wow!” she exclaimed again. “Did you know that I was supposed to marry Dennis Hamilton?”
He laughed, but she shook her head. “I’m serious, Taylor. When I left the Restoration House, it was because I’d made a promise to my parents that I would marry anyone they wanted me to. I was tired of that House and wanted to get away from it. My plan was to find a way to escape Fallow Creek one day, but when I found out it was Dennis Hamilton they wanted me to marry, I freaked out. I couldn’t bring myself to do it.”
He shook his head slowly, shocked. “I didn’t know that,” he said, loathing the man who had tried to force Lily into marrying him. “So then he kicked you out of Fallow Creek for refusing to become his wife?”
“Yes. He said he didn’t want me to ‘pollute the minds of the other women in the community.’ He said I was already lost. I was sent out of town with nothing but what my mom was able to secretly give me, though it wasn’t a lot.” The amazed look on her face returned. “So I can go back to Fallow Creek now,” she said, sounding excited. “I can finally see my parents. I probably won’t stay there because I don’t want to stay in a small town anymore, but I’ll…”
He interrupted her. “Lily there’s something else,” he said.
She arched her eyebrow. “What is it?”
“Rachel told me that shortly after she took over leadership of the town, people started to leave. She said that almost everyone has left now except for the women who were at the Restoration House already and a few who joined the House later.”
Lily pressed her lips together as a look of dread appeared on her face. “What about my parents?” she asked in a shaky voice. “And my sister? Did she leave as well?”
“I don’t know, Lily.” He took her hand again on the table. She looked so worried that he wanted to take her in his arms, but that would not be a good idea. “We can call Rachel together and ask her right now.” He looked around. The restaurant was still full and as noisy and rowdy as ever. “Let’s step out of the restaurant for a minute.”
They walked out of the restaurant together and stood in a corner that was empty of people and less noisy. He dialed Rachel’s number, and she answered on the second ring. Putting her on speaker, he said, “Rachel, Lily Hunter is here with me.”
Rachel’s voice came on the other end of the line. “Lily! How are you? Taylor told me you live in Tucson now.”
“Yes,” Lily said, a smile on her face. “I called you once or twice, but you didn’t answer.”
“I’m so sorry,” Rachel told her. “A lot has happened over the past few months, and I stopped answering calls from unknown numbers.”
The smile melted off Lily’s face, and she looked worried again. “Taylor was just telling me that you said most of the people in Fallow Creek have left the community. Do you know if my parents and my sister, Stella, are still there?”
For a few seconds there was silence over the line, and then Rac
hel answered, “I really don’t know, but my guess is that they have left as well.”
“Maybe you can help me check their house to see if they’re still there,” Lily pleaded.
“I will,” Rachel said, “But to be truthful, I think they’ve left. I know all the people who are still in this community.”
Taylor silently sighed. Not all.
“Most of them now stay in the Restoration House where my husband and I live. If your parents and sister were still in town, I would know.”
Lily bit her lip and said nothing for some seconds. She looked like she was about to cry. Taylor took her hand and squeezed it encouragingly, and she gave him a sweet smile. “You don’t know where the people who left went?” she asked.
“I have no idea,” Rachel answered. “I’m sure they are all spread in different places now.”
Lily’s shoulders stooped, and she bowed her head.
“Listen, Lily, now that everyone, including the elders who threw you out of Fallow Creek, have left, you can come back.”
Lily said nothing, and Rachel added, “Please think about it, Lily.”
“What’s the point?” she asked, raising her head again. “If my parents and sister aren’t there, then there’s no point going back. There’s nothing for me in Fallow Creek anymore. Besides, I don’t want to live in a small town any longer. My plan was to go back, find a way to get my parents and sister from Fallow Creek, and leave again.”
“But now that I’m the leader of this place, people can do whatever they want. Things aren’t the way they used to be.” She sighed loudly. “The town is deserted now.”
Lily shook her head, looking depressed. “No, Rachel, I can’t go back. Not knowing where my parents and Stella are bad enough. Going back to Fallow Creek would only make me more depressed. I’ll just stay here.” She pressed the phone to her ear. “Besides, I have plans to see the world one day. Living in tiny Fallow Creek is the last thing I want to do.”
Rachel chuckled. “You have plans to see the world?”
Lily did not smile. She shrugged. “I guess I caught a bit of a travel bug from my friend Sofia. She’s a world traveler, and it’s what I want as well. But I also need to find my parents and my sister.” Her voice choked up, and she didn’t say anything for a few seconds. Finally, she spoke again. “I need to find them, Rachel. I need to find them now. I miss them so much.”
Taylor’s heart went out to her. He knew how it felt to wish every day that a loved one was still around so you could see them. Not knowing where her parents and her sister were was no doubt extremely painful for her. An idea entered his heart, and he pushed it away immediately. He had to follow Rachel’s advice because it was right, especially as Lily had said now that she wanted to see the world. With Faye passing away, he didn’t want to bring anyone into their lives who was just going to leave at any moment. His children, especially Josh, had already suffered enough with the loss of their mom. Lily had other plans than settling into one place and watching or being responsible for kids that were not even her own. He couldn’t ask her to do the very opposite of what her dreams were.
“Please, Rachel, if you hear anything about the whereabouts of my parents and sister, or if they come back to Fallow Creek, please call me immediately,” Lily said, still sounding dismayed.
“I will, Lily. I promise.”
A small smile touched Lily’s lips. “And Rachel, I’m really happy for you. I’m glad you’ve taken over the leadership of Fallow Creek. You can now make all those changes you told me you would make in the community if you had the power to. It’s a shame that a lot of people have left, but there are still people there who need your help.”
“I know, Lily,” Rachel said. “More often than not, this ‘power’ I have feels more like a burden than a blessing. It’s been hard trying to figure out what to do for the good of this town every day. I felt so guilty after the mass exodus… I still kind of do. But I know that whoever the Lord has planned to remain here will remain. Anyway, let’s not talk about me anymore. I’ll try to ask around and see if anybody knows where your parents and sister went.”
“I really appreciate that.”
They talked a bit more about the state of the community, all the abandoned houses and what Rachel planned to do with them. Taylor was proud of her for taking control of the place in spite of so many obstacles and hardships that had come her way.
“I’ll call you once I get to California,” he told Rachel.
“Okay. Say hi to my niece and nephew. And Keith sends his greetings.”
After the call ended, they went back to their seats inside the restaurant. Taylor looked at Lily, and his pulse spiked with worry when he saw tears in her eyes. He couldn’t help taking her hand on the table and giving her a sympathetic smile. “I’m sorry about your family, Lily.”
“Here I was, dreaming for months of getting enough money so I could go back to Fallow Creek and get my parents and Stella, when they’ve been gone for a long time.” She sighed and said brokenly, “Where am I going to find them, Taylor? Where?” Her eyes shone with tears and then they ran down her cheeks.
He reached out and took both her hands. He knew he had to help her in spite of his decision to stay away. She was in distress, and he understood how awful she must feel. “Listen, Lily,” he said softly, “when I go back to California, I’ll make some calls and try to find out where your parents and sister are. There has to be someone in Fallow Creek who I can call; someone who knows where they went.”
She looked up at him with sad eyes. “But most people in Fallow Creek don’t even have a cell phone; at least, they didn’t when I left.”
“I know a few people who smuggled cell phones in, and a few like me who were allowed to have one. They might know where your parents are.”
A glimmer of hope entered her eyes, but just a glimmer. She gave him a smile, and then once again she wove their fingers together. She looked at him in a way that made his insides melt, and he felt as though, if he kept looking at her, he would take her in his arms right now and kiss her right here. He averted his eyes and pretended to look down at his food again.
“Taylor?”
He looked up at her again, and from the look in her eyes, he knew what she was going to say. But he couldn’t allow her to say it. They’d had five amazing but difficult days together, and they were both not thinking as clearly as they should. They needed time apart. He needed time to process his feelings for her and to spend alone with his kids. He had to give himself time to know if he could enter into another relationship. But he was sure he didn’t want to open his heart to more pain, and he certainly didn’t want to expose his kids to the kind of pain Josh had felt when his mom had passed.
Lily wanted to see the world; she only thought she wanted a relationship with him now because of their intense attraction to each other. But some time apart from him would help her settle her priorities again.
“Taylor, I know you feel what I’ve felt these past few days...”
He interjected quickly before she could finish her sentence. “I know. I’ll miss you too, Lily. The days we spent together were great, but all good things have to come to an end. I’m definitely glad to go back to my kids, finally. I’ll call you when I get to California, especially if I have news about your parents.”
His heart twisted with pain at how hurt she looked. The expression on her face turned from dismay to anger. She pulled her hand away from his, got up abruptly, snatched her purse from the table, and hurried out of the restaurant.
Regret and worry flooded him as he sat there looking after her and wishing with all his heart that he could change what he had said. But then again, there was nothing else he could have said to her. Conflicting emotions warred in his heart. Maybe it was better this way. At least she might suffer less if she thought of him as a jerk once he was gone.
And yet, he was appalled at the thought.
His thoughts were all jumbled up as he fought himself, trying to figure out wha
t he should do. His heart told him to go after her, but his head told him to let her go. He remembered Rachel’s advice. It was the best advice for him now. Let Lily go, Taylor. In time, he would probably forget about her and she him.
He groaned. That would probably never happen. Still, the best thing was for him to let her go. He looked down at his empty plate, feeling miserable.
“I can’t,” he muttered. I can’t let her go. Not when she was so terribly sad because she didn’t know where her family was. And not when the last thing she would remember about him was that he was a heartless jerk. Even though he still could not start a relationship with her because he had to protect his heart, and because it was not the right thing to do, he couldn’t just let her go when she was suffering so much.
But what are you going to do? It’s not as if you can give her what she wants.
He ignored the warning in his heart and stood up. Quickly, he paid for their meal, strode out of the restaurant, and out of the hotel.
Chapter 13
Once she got to her apartment, Lily collapsed on the sofa and began to weep. She scolded herself for crying over Taylor, but she couldn’t stop. She had gone to his hotel telling herself that she could protect her heart, her feelings. But she had not been able to because she wanted so much more than to be just a temporary source of comfort for him. But what she wanted, he was not willing to give.
What am I saying?
He wasn’t just unwilling to give what she wanted, he didn’t want to give anything. Yes, he’d given a lot of stuff, but she wanted his heart and not those things. She angrily dashed at the tears that poured down her cheeks. He had promised to help find her parents. She was grateful for that, but at the same time, it grated on her. Now she was sure that he thought of her as nothing but a charity case. He was kind and generous, and all she was to him was an opportunity to give to someone who was suffering, someone who was a childhood friend and had fallen on hard times. Yes, he liked her, but not in the same way that she liked him.