To the Paris of our dreams

by Tomas Goncalves

  Eric couldn't stop asking himself what the hell had happened to his family.

 

 

  The Ocean... It was something so unfamiliar to Eric at that point in his life. Actually it had always been like that. Everything in St Jean seemed to be just too different from his life: open spaces, clean, light atmosphere and with happy, healthy people. He was just so used to pubs, parties, concerts, hangover, headache, fast-food, depressed and/or drunk people that he was taking a while to take all that in. For Mike, it was the same. Alice, in the other hand, was at home. She made Eric go in the ocean the first day they were there.

  After the first day on the beach, with a really nice lunch on this outside deck their house had, they spent a couple of hours talking until it got dark and they decided to go to bed.

  The next day, they had a lazy nap after coming back from the beach and having lunch. When they woke up they decided to go walk around St Jean de Luz for a while, stopping at a restaurant eventually to have some dinner, in a place that was surprisingly packed considering the size of that city.

  After finishing eating, as they were walking some more, they noticed this small music concert inside a church, and being pressure by their parents, they got in to take some pictures. Eric was feeling exhausted. When he laid down on his bed that night, he fell asleep almost instantly, and didn’t even had time to think about having sex with Alice.

  Nothing else had surprised him more than the fact of having some responsible figure around. Richard was far from being a paternal figure, after all.

  Next morning, Isadora had to come and wake him up to have breakfast with the whole family. Again, another weird feeling. “Getting waken up to have breakfast?”

  Brazilian coffee and Milk, scrambled eggs, bacon, croissants, brioches, chocolatines, cereals, fruits, brown toast with quinoa and all those weird grains stuff, pancakes and everything else you could think of.

  Once he was finished eating, he just relaxed on his chair and felt like smiling for no reason. Actually, he felt happiness irradiating from his stomach. He gently kissed Alice.

  When he was going to his room to get ready to go to the beach, he noticed the time: it was eight in the morning. He'd slept then, eight straight hours, and had actually woken up a bit after he would usually go to bed. It was definitely weird to realize that.

  - Hey sweetie, what's up? - Alice noticed he was a bit lost in his thoughts.

  “Sweetie?”

  He smiled at her

  “When did I become sweetie?” And he repeated his thought out loud.

  - Since the very first day – She smiled – What's wrong?

  - ... I just realized how early it is.

  - ... Yeah, I know. But we should wake up early to enjoy the best part of the day on the beach, no?

  Eric went silent.

  - ...Eric? - She called his attention again, smiling.

  - It's just a bit weird, you know. - He wasn't smiling anymore

  She sat beside him at the bed, and started caressing his hair. She was not openly smiling anymore, but she still had a nice and happy feature.

  - Which part?

  - I don't know... Being here, on a beach house, with my family around. Having you, all gorgeous and nice to me, calling me sweetie.

  She was still caressing his hair, but now she was showing an incomprehensible facial expression. No one said anything for a while.

  - Thank you – She finally said

  - For the compliment? You don't ha...

  - No, no... For everything. For the compliment, and for the invitation to come, and... For everything.

  She smiled at him and then she kissed him. That so creepily reminded him of what Marie had told him once.

  - Look, I don't know about… Well, actually I don't know much about you in the first place – She smiled – But we are having a really great time here, aren't we? Maybe you should just try to relax and enjoy it, before you have to go back to the States... In any case, you need to first assimilate the idea of having a family near you again, so then you can do all the rationalization you need. You're not gonna go anywhere if you keep stopping yourself from having fun.

  Silence

  - Alice and her words of wisdom...

  They both smiled

  - Come on, let’s go to the beach have a nice time, shall we?

  Eric couldn't understand how, but that quick talk with Alice had taken a lot of weight off his chest. What a weird random talk.

 

  A couple of days later, Eric, Alice, Mike and the siblings went to the beach really early again, while his parents would go somewhere near Biarritz, saying they would take a while to get back. Isadora said they were going to visit a friend who lived not far from there.

  After the whole morning at the beach, they went to have lunch in a restaurant near the sea, this time closer to St Jean. It was a relatively simple place, but it had some really good food. On their way there, they passed in front of a place – for the fifth time, probably – and noticed a plate saying “Henry Matisse lived here” Alice got especially excited about it because she really liked Matisse, so she ended up taking a picture in front of the sign. In the restaurant, midway through the meal, Eric had the weird sensation of being responsible for everyone (he was indeed the oldest one, and it was his family after all that was there)

  He also noticed something even weirder: It was being very hard to get used again to the idea of having parents around, but it had been completely natural for him to get close with his siblings. They were very smart (obscenely smart, actually) and incredibly fun to have around. Isadora was a shining person, very excited about life, talking and being nice to everyone, like... all the time. Gustavo was a bit quieter, had a very ironic and imaginative mind, crazy in a very peculiar way. He was always touching his own hair, something that Eric recognized about himself, seven years before. Eric got to know that both Gustavo and Isadora were in this very prestigious private school in Toulouse, Isadora with a partial scholarship and Gustavo with a full scholarship. That's right, Gustavo was too smart, and apparently he didn't even had to try while Isadora was the very studious type of girl.

  It was not only that: Eric and Alice were undeniably a couple now. Surprisingly, Eric was starting to get really open and being very affectionate with her. He was feeling very comfortable around her, and she was also very comfortable around him.

  Alice was just something unbelievable to Eric: she couldn't exist. She was just too awesome.

  Mike couldn't help but notice how much Eric was different those days from the Eric he was used to. After five years, he finally met his friend's family, and he was very, very happy to have accepted Eric's invitation.

  What was also helping them to enjoy their vacations is that Eric and Mike were unreachable. Richard knew when they would go back to the states and that they didn't want to be bothered during those two weeks, and apparently it was working.

  In the middle of all that, something really disturbed Eric. Something he first noticed, for real, in that restaurant that day, which basically changed the whole trip, and I guess everything that followed: Mike and Isadora. The looks they were giving each other.

  Eric really didn't know how to feel about it.

 

  Three days later, when Eric and Alice were walking around Biarritz – He was completely dazzled about her, because of all the fun they were having - he decided to ask if that was his
imagination or if indeed there was something happening between Mike and Isadora. He waited for the right moment to ask: he didn't want to sound stupid about it.

  At some point, they were in this restaurant with a stunning view of the ocean.

  - Wow, it’s beautiful here, no? - She smiled at him

  He just smiled back at her. There was a nice and pleasant silence in the air, and they were holding hands over the table.

  - A penny for your thoughts, Eric

  - Hm... I don't know. - He smiled

  - Are you having a good time?

  - Yeah yeah, of course... - They smiled at each other.

  - Good, good... So what has been your favorite part of the trip?

  Eric smirked at her

  - Ahn... really?

  She smiled back

  - Really really....

  - Hmm... I enjoy being here. With you... And I like being...I don't know how to put that... free, I guess? … From my obligations and my routine. I mean, it's really nice here, just relaxing like that...

  She smiled at him, saying:

  - Cool... See? It didn't hurt. - She said, and he just smiled back at her – What about your family?

  - What about them?

  - Well, you told me it has been years since last time you saw each other, right?

  - Yeah...

  - How's that going for you?

  - Hmm... I'm having fun with Isa and Gustavo, they grew up to be pretty cool actually.

  - Yeah, I noticed that – She smiled again – ….What about your parents?

  Eric took a deep breath

  - Well... its ok I guess. - He said it with difficulty

  - Just ok?

  - … Ah, I don't know Alice... It's complicated.

  - Is it? Is it really? Or are you complicating it yourself? - She jokingly said that

  Eric eventually smiled back

  -Yeah... No, trust me. It's complicated.... I'm just still a bit uncomfortable on having them around I guess...

  - I see... Well, I have time...

  - I know you do – He gave her a quick smile – But not today...

  - All right then, champs... You know you can talk to me, right?

  - Yeah, I do....Thanks

  - My pleasure

  They didn't say anything for a while, just looking at each other, at the ocean, then looking around to the other people who were at the restaurant.

  - So hey...Is it just me, or Mike and Isadora are...?

  Alice smiled

  - Eric... Sweetie. We're here for what? A week already. From day one they were already exchanging some malicious looks.

  Eric smiled, not believing it.

  - Since the first day? Jez, I'm so gonna kill Mike.... I saw how he looked at her when he first saw her, but come on...

  - Why did you think they didn't want to come?

  - Well, I noticed thaat... What about Gustavo?

  - He's probably looking for some girl. Maybe surfing... Maybe not.

  They laughed.

  - Your siblings are fast, man.

  A woman sat in this tiny ‘stage’ that was basically just a seat and a microphone, and started singing a slow, romantic music that made them just got quiet to fully listen and enjoy it. That lunch would take hours, and it was really pleasant, as some sort of magical moment in their lives, with the ocean beside them.

  It felt like they spent an eternity there, eating, drinking, talking and laughing.

  After that, they decided to just drive around and it took them a good couple of hours to get home. On the car, they were talking about authors and literature in general: Hemingway, Kerouac, Tolstoi, Kundera, Saramago, Proust and so many other. Most of the talk was really light, and they had a very interesting talk, with Alice talking non-stop about it.

  - Wow.... you really know your writers, eh?

  - Yeah.... Well, I don't know, I find it interesting to learn things about this guy's lives. I find it amazing to think about their work having in mind their... life story.

  - Yeap, I get that.

  - You should, you're an artist too. Isn't it clear that your life affects your work?

  - And vice versa, sure.... But, hmm... I never thought of our music like mine. Mike was the one that always really created the songs.

  - Hmm. He says basically the same about you... How you always bring the feeling to the music, the body of it, most of the lyrics... No?

  - Hmm... I don't know. I think that’s Mike only being modest...

  - Ok... What if that's you being modest too?

  - I don't know... I never saw myself as a modest guy. Much for the contrary... So I don't know why I'd do that.... - He smiled at her

  - Okayy.... - She smirked – So, what would you say it’s your contribution for the band?

  - For the band or for the music? They're very different things.... - He winked at her

  - Ha... You know what I meant...

  - Alright... For the band, the looks, obviously, I mean... – He was trying to be funny. Alice laughed and said “Alright, naturally”

  - For the music.... Hmm... I guess I do have a hand in the creation process. Mike knows all about the music... like, everything that there is to know, seriously. You can ask him about any band, any genre, anything music or … at least rock related... He is an incredible musician, for real. When I met him, I got completely baffled by his skills and his knowledge: that guy would literally spend like five or six hours a day practicing guitar and more a couple of hours studying music and listening music, and all. For real... It doesn't matter how talented I am or anything, Mike was born to do that, and he would have succeed at it without me, I'm sure about it.

  - But? Where did you came into the picture?

  - He...was too young, unexperienced, naïve even. He had zero friends, mostly because he was that … devoted to his music at that age. I have never seen such commitment... But he... he wasn't very sure about what he had to say to the world, or how to say it. He was very...hmm... doubtful when it came to writing songs, you know? And I... I had a lot of ...anger … and I knew exactly what we had to say, how to say it, and to where we should head. So in a way, we helped each other to achieve what we wanted. Even though he needed a big push in the beginning... He never thought he was good enough, that he was ready to make music.... I don't know. I helped the guy make friends in San Francisco, took him to some hard core parties – Alice laughed at that point – And I don't know. It may sound a bit cheesy, but since then, he takes care of the music and I take care of the band...

  - Ok... And Liam and Jack?

  - Good musicians, very good musicians too actually. They knew each other already, they sort of tried to have a band before meeting us... And yeah, we, me and Mike I mean, we met them through friends. For a while it was very exciting, you know. Friends in Frisco, parties, meeting people, the start of getting famous... Making big money.

  - Yeah, sounds exciting...

  - Uhum... But yeah, I still feel like there's somethings I can't talk to him, you know? He's too good of a guy to understand somethings, sometimes...

  -
I see... Well, have you ever gave him a chance?

  Eric shrugged his shoulders, and looked away.

  - I don't know... - He sighed - Not really

  Alice turned her head to the road. She felt like he had just ended the conversation about that topic, just like that.

  - Okay... Soo are we going back to the beach when we get home?

  - Yeah, sounds like a plan – He smiled at her

  - Awesome... Hey, what about that observatory?

  - Hmm, maybe tomorrow? Tonight I just feel like going to eat somewhere and do nothing...

  - Alriight, sounds like a plan too... - She smiled at him

 

  When they got home, they saw Mike, Isadora and Gustavo and a random girl (With her head on Gustavo's lap) chilling in the living room. They decided to join them and go to the beach, even though they took almost an hour to actually leave the house, everyone being lazy at that point.

  After they swam for a while, and did all the silly things you can usually do on a beach, Eric and Mike bet who could reach this floating platform, around eighty meter from the sand, where people could go to dive or just to chill in the sun.

  One...two...three... and water! Cold and almost rigid water. They swam, swam and got there at the same second, for Eric's surprise.

  They laid down on the platform, with the sun warming their bodies. '

  The quietute was really nice, with only the sound of the ocean and the people, far away.

  - Man... I'm really glad I accepted your invitation to come.

  - Right?! I told you it would be fun...

  - Yeah, so nice here, this beach, this weather...

  - Sure... but of course you aren't that happy just because of the place, eh?

  Mike slowly looked at Eric, smiling