by Erin Trejo
“This is amazing,” I say softly. Alexei chuckles and leads me toward the door that reads balcony. I gasp loudly, but he only laughs and leads me inside. We climb the stairs and he ushers me to our seats.
“I don’t know what to say, Alexei,” I tell him looking at his handsome face. He just smiles and brings my hand to his lips, pressing a soft gentle kiss to my knuckles.
“Seeing you smile is thanks enough, воробей.” My heart stutters in my chest. I want to say more but the lights dim, and the show begins. I watch in awe as we watch the performers doing their rendition of the Nutcracker. I can’t tear my eyes away from the stage for even a second. All too soon it’s over and Alexei is ushering me back down the stairs.
“Did you enjoy it?” He asks with a smile.
“It was amazing. I have no words.” Alexei pulls me against his body, hugging me to him when a man speaks.
“Alexei. Never expected to see you here,” the man says. Alexei spins me, keeping me tucked into his side as he extends his hand to the man.
“Ivan, how lovely to see you, and you as well Meredith,” he says greeting them both.
“Who do you have here?” The woman asks, her brown eyes sparkling as she looks at me.
“This is my date, Clara.” He introduces us, and we speak briefly.
“Well, it was a pleasure meeting you, Clara. As always, it’s lovely to see you, Mr. Pavlov.” I gasp when she says that name. My head jerks to look up at Alexei before I look back to her. She called him Pavlov. He isn’t Pavlov. He can’t be. My mind whirls as I try to keep my breathing even. It isn’t working. Alexei notices and excuses us, tugging me out of the theater. Resting his hands on my shoulders, he turns me to face him.
“What happened? You’re pale. Are you feeling alright?” His concern is genuine which only plunges another dagger through my heart. I swallow hard and will myself to calm down.
“I’m fine. I’m sorry, I think it was just a lot to take in,” I lie. Alexei nods his head and grabs my hand leading me back to the car. My mind is a mess of information. I can’t focus on having a conversation with him, so I don’t. I sit quietly in the car on the way back to his house. All this new information is causing my heart to race. The ride back to Alexei’s is a blur and once we’re there, I’m not sure what to do. He leads me inside but he’s as silent as I am. He takes my coat and as soon as he turns to put it away, I move. I’m up the stairs and in my room before he has the chance to process. I tear the earrings from my ears and toss them to the floor before moving to the dress next. It slides down my body caressing every inch of me as tears stream down my cheeks. I bend over and pick it up, balling it up in my hands. Alexei walks through the door and I take my anger out on him. As I throw the dress in his face, he watches me intently.
“What happened?” he asks unsure of what to do or say.
“What are we doing, Alexei? What are we doing?” I scream. He watches me, a strange look crossing his face. He moves toward me slowly, never taking his eyes off me and God, do I want him to. His stare is so heated and full of passion. I want this man in ways that I shouldn’t, but I can’t stop myself.
“What do you mean? We were having a great Christmas Eve as far as I was concerned,” he says. I want to hate him. I do, but I can’t find it in me. I know what needs to be done and yet, I can’t find it in me to do it. Not yet. I just need more time. That’s what I keep telling myself. I just need more time to come to terms with all of this.
“Were we?” Alexei moves quickly once he’s close enough to me. He grabs me around the waist and lifts me in his arms. He turns on his heel and storms out of my room and straight to his. I scream, pounding my fists into his back but he doesn’t stop. Throwing me roughly on the bed, my body bounces as he reaches for something in his nightstand. I scramble to get off the bed but he’s faster than I am. He’s stronger and bigger. He climbs onto the bed, pressing me into the mattress, grabbing my wrists and yanking them above my head. I writhe and wiggle, trying to buck him off, but it’s impossible. My wrists are bound to the headboard in a matter of seconds, the rope digging into my flesh.
“Let me go!” I scream and try to kick. Alexei chuckles and grabs my ankles, tying them down as well. I’m spread wide on his bed unable to move. I tug at the restraints but it’s no use.
“You won’t get free,” he muses as he watches me.
“I’m not your toy! You can’t just keep playing with me!” I scream louder. I watch as he pulls his jacket down his arms and discards it. The tattoos that I know are under that shirt slowly come into view as he removes that too. I swallow harder, but I can’t pull my eyes from him. He’s magnetic.
“I’ve been wondering when you would break,” he says keeping his tone smooth just like the man himself.
“You’re a little late to the party for that,” I remind him. His eyes sparkle as the corner of his lips tug into a grin. He removes the rest of his clothes before climbing on the end of the bed, his fingers dragging up my leg and inner thigh. Fire burns in my core and my heart races.
“Are you going to take me like they did? With force?” His fingers stop when I say that. His eyes jump to mine, a darkness I’ve never seen in him catches me off guard.
“Have I taken you without your permission since you’ve been here?” Asshole. That bastard. He knows what he’s doing to me. He reaches for my panties and in one hard tug rips them from my body. His crawling up my body makes me shiver.
“I think I liked it better when you didn’t speak,” he hisses shoving my panties into my mouth. I try to use my tongue to push them out but when Alexei looks down at me, I stop. There’s danger seeping out of this man that he’s never shown me before. There’s hatred and rage that he’s kept bottled up inside of him but now I see it in his eyes and it terrifies, yet excites me. Alexei moves back down my body licking and kissing at my chest and stomach before spreading me wider. With that evil glint in his eyes, he leans down and runs his tongue through the wetness he’s created. He never takes his eyes off mine and I find it harder and harder to not watch him too.
“You can’t do this,” I pant knowing he will do it anyway. Not like he can understand a word I’m saying with these panties in my mouth. I don’t know why I’m trying to fight him. His lips suck my clit into his mouth and my body trembles. One finger slides inside of me, curling at just the right angle. Each stroke of his finger sends me spiraling out of control. I breathe heavily through my nose as I feel myself tipping toward the edge of an orgasm, but Alexei doesn’t give it to me. He pulls away and I whine and whimper. Positioning himself between my legs, I watch him intently.
“Now it’s time to fuck you the way I’ve been thinking about since you got here. I didn’t think I could keep the monster at bay for that long, but I saw something in you,” he says as though he isn’t quite sure of what that something is. My eyes are laser-focused on him and when he unties one of my ankles, I think about fighting him, then he’s pushing inside me and I can’t. I can’t breathe or react. His thrusts are out of control. His fingers dig into my flesh no doubt marking me. There’s pain mixed with pleasure and I’m able to differentiate the two. They both mingle as one as tears slowly slide down my cheeks.
“You think you can fly away from me, воробей?” he asks, evil dancing in the shadows of his eyes. I’ve never seen this side of him, but as he plunges into me, I can feel it. Whatever rage simmers inside of him, he’s taking it out on me. I don’t know what happened, what flipped the switch in him but I’m on the receiving end of it.
Chapter 17
Alexei
How dare she run from me? After everything I’ve done for her. She made a mistake thinking that she could get away. She awoke the beast inside of me that I didn’t want her to see. She didn’t deserve to see him until now. I’ve prided myself on keeping control, and she just ripped down that wall. My fingers dig into her pale flesh as I fuck her roughly. This isn’t like the other times, this is far worse. The more I take, the more I want. She is
n’t like me and that’s the part in the back of my head that keeps telling me to stop, but I can’t. She broke the chains that held the madness in me and now there’s no going back. I drag my hand up, lifting her leg higher so that I can get deeper. I just need to be a little bit deeper. With each slap of our bodies coming together, the higher I get. I hear her sobbing around the gag in her mouth, I see the tears running down her cheeks, but I can’t do anything about that right now. She brought this on herself.
“You like the pain, yes?” I ask pressing my thumb to her clit and slowly moving it. Her body jerks and her eyes meet mine. There’s something dark in her too but she’s afraid to let it out. I want to see it, taste it, touch it. I want it to mingle with my own and see how well our demons play together. The more I have of this girl, the more I want to keep her around. I lean down and sink my teeth into her neck listening to her scream around the panties in her mouth. The harder I thrust, the higher I get until I can’t take it anymore. I explode inside her and feel her unravel around me. We both come hard, feeling the other tense and release. I lie on top of her, careful not to crush her before reaching up and pulling the panties from her mouth. She gasps for air as she comes down from that high. I reach up and wipe the trail of tears from her face.
“Why did you do that?” she asks softly.
“You didn’t like it?” I rebut.
“Why, Alexei?”
“You ran from me. I gave you the option and you chose to stay. You unlocked something dark in me when you pulled that little stunt. I’ve kept myself under control, but you’ve broken that restraint. Why did you run? Do you know Ivan?” She shakes her head but there’s something more. Something happened that flipped a switch for her. She was fine before that.
“You lie to me, воробей. You will learn how much I despise lies.” I climb off the bed, tying her ankle back in place. She tugs at the ropes doing nothing more than cutting into her own flesh. I head into the bathroom and start the shower before walking back into my room. Her eyes follow my every movement as I untie her. She quickly sits up and scoots against the headboard, rubbing her sore wrists. I hold my hand out to her and wait to see what she’ll do. Much to my surprise, she reaches out and takes my hand. I help her off the bed, watching her small frame as she moves. The red spots from my fingers will no doubt show bruising tomorrow. As I lead her into the bathroom and think it over, I like the idea of my marks being on her. No one else will touch her once they see what I’ve done to her. It shouldn’t make me as happy as it does.
“What if I changed my mind?” she asks softly as I pull her into the shower with me. I reach for the shampoo, squirting some into my hand before motioning for her to turn around. She does as she’s told, and I begin to massage the shampoo into her long red hair.
“I don’t think you have,” I reply. She doesn’t respond after that. I wash her hair loving how the long silky strands run through my fingers. I could find myself easily obsessed with this girl. The more I think about it, the more I think I already am. She’s pure and that’s something that draws out the darkness in me. The thought that I’m the one that brings her to her knees makes my cock jump. She feels it too, a gasp escaping her lips. I chuckle as I slide my hands down her neck and around the front. Soaping her breasts and her hardened nipples, I lean down and kiss the other side of her neck.
“Why do you want to lie to me, Clara?” I whisper, my teeth tugging her earlobe. She moans when my hands slip down her taut stomach and grasp her mound roughly.
“I’m not lying,” she says breathlessly. How can she lie and be so turned on at the same time, is beyond anything I can comprehend? She wants me. I know she does and the breathy way she moans and speaks tells me so.
“Do you really want to leave, Clara?” I ask slipping my fingers over her clit. Her body arches, her back pressing into my chest, her head falling to my shoulder. “Tell me,” I encourage her as I circle her clit harder and faster. Her body responds. She’s panting and it’s fucking sexy as hell to watch her like this. Under my spell.
“No,” she moans as her body shudders, her release leaking between her thighs. I groan and push her forward, her hands landing on the built-in bench. Her ass is pressed into my cock and before either of us can fully comprehend it, I’m back inside her. Holding her hips tightly in my hands, I fuck her from behind. Her soapy hair sways with each thrust. Then I reach up, wind it around my fist and pull her head back roughly and she cries out.
“Tell me you aren’t leaving me, Clara.”
“I’m not… I’m not leaving you,” she screams as I take her harder. With each slap of my balls against her perfect body, I swell inside of her. Despite the cool water that trickles over my skin, sweat beads on my temples. I’m drowning in the sensations of her body. I come once more inside of her, she finds release as well. I jerk her hair harder, pulling her up before wrapping my arm around her waist, holding her in place. My cock still jerks inside of her but at this angle, I can feel more than I have before. Her body continues to shudder, her pussy grasping and clenching.
“I hope you know you’ve just made a deal with the devil,” I whisper in her ear before pulling my cock free. I finish washing her and then wash myself before I step out of the shower and offer her my hand. She takes it once again and I help her dry off and wrap the fluffy towel around her body. She stands in stunned silence as I do the same for myself. She’s no doubt thinking about what I just said to her. Her body trembles only slightly when I touch her shoulder. I smirk, loving that little reaction to me. Now that she’s broken into the cage of the monster, she should be afraid. Now that he’s had a taste of her, things will never be the same. I grab the brush off the counter and run it through her long hair. Her eyes catch mine in the mirror and confusion paints her face.
“Ask whatever you want,” I tell her. She licks her soft lips and shakes her head.
“You were so nice to me before.”
“And now?”
“You are different. You were not this rough before with me. You almost seemed caring,” she says her eyes never leaving mine. I chuckle and finish brushing her hair before slipping my hand around her neck. I squeeze lightly, her big blue eyes becoming even wider as she watches.
“I tried to keep that part of me away from you, воробей. The more I tried, the harder it became. When you ran, it all snapped. I snapped. I’m not a good man as you very well know,” I remind her. With my hand wrapped around her neck, I turn her head and slant my mouth over hers. She doesn’t resist and there’s a small thought in the back of my mind that wonders if she likes it like this. I know she wants some pain with sex, but I think I took it to a different level. Now she’s going to understand what my needs are.
“Merry Christmas, Clara.”
Chapter 18
Clara
He’s marked my body more than just that one night. Christmas day we spent in his bed. He told me about what he expects of me and that I was never leaving him. Fear coursed through my veins knowing exactly what he meant. I’ve tried to remain as calm as I possibly can, given the situation I’m now in. Everything I thought I knew about Alexei Pavlov has intensified. He’s far more dangerous than I originally thought. That thought was hammered home when he came in a few minutes ago covered in blood.
“Are you hurt?” My initial instinct was to run to him and make sure that the man that’s now holding me hostage, the man that has slowly begun taking my heart into his hands. was alright. The glint in his eye told me not to get too close.
“No, воробей. I’m not hurt. You might want to choose your words more wisely, I almost think you care about me,” he says smirking over his shoulder at me. My heart leaps and heat pools within me. My cheeks flush, a blush working its way up my neck and Alexei sees it. He turns around, his bare chest glistening with sweat.
“Do you like looking at me?” He asks seductively. How could I say no? It’s beyond obvious that I enjoy it. He’s solid and muscled. The tattoos that adorn his body hold my inte
rest just as much as the man himself.
“Why do you have so many tattoos?” His eyes flare before he looks down at his own body.
“They’re symbolic. Many of them are from my time in prison.” I gasp loud enough for him to hear it. His eyes move back to mine and hold steady. I know that the Russians have different values and find their places in the mafia differently than the Irish, but I didn’t know to what extent. I have a feeling that Alexei is about to tell me though.
“Let me wash up and I’ll tell you a little more, yes?” I nod my head and sit back on the bed as he heads into the bathroom. The shower turns on and I do something I haven’t done since I’ve been here. I snoop through his things. I pull out drawers and check for a phone. The one thing I have noticed is that there are no regular phones here. No landlines. Alexei has a cell phone but it’s always with him. To me, that seems odd. Now that I think about it, the only television I have seen is the one here in his room, but he never turns it on. I climb off the bed and silently make my way towards his dresser, digging through those drawers as well. I don’t find anything but a picture of a woman. She’s gorgeous with long dark hair and dark eyes just like Alexei’s. The similarities are obvious, and I know that this woman is somehow related to him. I’m so enraptured by the photo, that I didn’t hear him come out of the bathroom.
“Whatever you’re looking for, you won’t find it.” His words send a chill down my spine. Does he even know what I’m looking for?
“Who is she?” I ask holding the photo up for him to see. Alexei strolls toward me, a towel around his waist. Taking the picture from my fingers, he gazes at it.
“She was my mother. She was a coward,” he hisses as he looks down at the woman that gave him life.
“She was your mother,” I remind him. He tosses the picture back into the drawer and turns to look me in the eye.