The Moore Sisters of Montana: The Complete Series Box Set: Books 1-4

by Ann B. Harrison

“Oh, it’s true. He was the topic of conversation in that house every single day for months. That was a bad time for everyone involved. Ethan might not tell you, and I doubt Pearl or Jeff would either, but things were nasty for ages. Ethan was gutted. I mean, not only did he push away the love of his life but he lost his brother too, the guy he wanted to be like. You know the guy he looked up to, hero worshipped? That can do a lot of damage to a younger person. And to have his folks battling each other at the same time, well it was almost too much for him to deal with.”

  A niggle started in the middle of her shoulder blades. “Why were his parents fighting?”

  “Don’t know. Neither of them would say according to Ethan but he’s pretty sure it had to do with Rake. He tried to stay out of their way as much as he could after that. Spent a fair bit of time with me, working with my dad on the weekends so he didn’t have to be at home with his folks.” Christian walked away from her, inspected a joint in the timber where the dividing wall used to be. He rubbed his finger over the joint before turning back to her.

  “Ethan changed then. I guess we all grew up around that time anyway but it was more for him. He lost his happy if that makes sense. You and Rake took that from him and I’d only just started to see it coming back and wham! You came back and did it again.” He stared at her, hands on hips. “What the hell’s going on, Mari? Are you trying to drive him insane because you’re doing a damned good job if you are?”

  “You don’t have the right to accuse me of anything, Christian. I did what I had to do to survive and you seem to forget, he dumped me.”

  “He was scared about what you wanted out of life but he adored you. You know that.” He walked over to her, his work boots tapping out a rhythm on the wooden floor. “I’m not saying you didn’t do the right thing. All I’m saying is I’m losing my best friend for a second time and I don’t like it. The poor fool still loved you even after everything that happened between you.”

  Tears pricked her eyes. “It’s not that simple.”

  “Nothing ever is, especially if you let it get away on you. A wise man once told me something and I do my best to live by that. ‘The quicker you say sorry, the less it hurts.’ Don’t leave him struggling until it’s too late this time. He deserves better from all of you.” He walked out leaving her battling her own tears.

  How could she contemplate saying sorry for something she didn’t do? She wasn’t responsible for what Rake did. She couldn’t even be called an accomplice because technically they didn’t know the other was going to run. Not until they met on the road outside of town where she sat with her battered suitcase waiting for a lift.

  It’d been hard on them too. Rake had a little money stashed away and somewhere to go after being offered a spot in a boxing gym with the promise of a fight if he worked hard and proved he was as good as they thought he was. She, on the other hand, had nothing more than the clothes on her back, a few personal belongings, and whatever money she’d managed to scrape together. It didn’t amount to much.

  “You can always stay with me.” Rake’s dark eyes glistened in the dim light. “I’ve got somewhere to stay. Not much but it’ll do. Just until you figure out where you want to go.”

  “Why would you care?”

  “I saw the way my father treated you. We have something in common. Figure you want to get away from him as much as I do.”

  And it had all come out. The family secrets, the pain Rake held in and only let loose in the ring. The reason he didn’t want anything to do with any of them again. Which was why she was so surprised when he bought the Lake Hotel and wanted her to bring Noah back to raise him in Cherry Lake. It was where everything her husband ran from existed.

  The next week dragged for Mari. Noah couldn’t understand not seeing Ethan around anymore. “He doesn’t work here now that the job’s finished. You have to understand, his company takes him all over the place and we might not see him as much.”

  “But I thought you liked him. He kissed you, Mom.”

  “When did you see that, Noah?”

  He shrugged. “Dunno. Maybe here after work.”

  The feel of his lips on hers taunted her at night. She didn’t need her son reminding her of what she was missing out on. This time of evening was particularly hard for her. In the short time they’d been around each other, she’d grown used to seeing him. Now it was her and Noah, alone. Again.

  “You liked it. I know you did.”

  Her young man was way too observant. “Yes, I did. But things change, honey. Ethan is busy and I have so much to do here with the hotel, getting it ready for the business. It’s been ages since I did a wedding and I need to get back to it.”

  “It’s not fair. I don’t have a dad to talk to anymore.”

  Mari gathered her son into her arms and stroked her hand over his head. “Oh, honey. I know and I’m sorry. I miss him too.” Noah leaned with his head on her shoulder, snuggled in like he used to do when he was tiny. She leaned her head back on the couch and cuddled her son wondering if they were doomed to be alone forever. Rake would be devastated if he could see how his well-laid plans had turned out.

  Chapter Twenty

  “Did you ask her what her plans are with the boy, Son?” Jeff stood with his cap in hand as Ethan got out of his truck after work one night. The last thing he wanted was to have this conversation with his father and he’d been avoiding him on purpose.

  “Yeah.” He slammed the door, clomped up the steps to his front porch.

  “What did she say?”

  “Kicked me out. Said something about trust, how I shouldn’t even have to ask that question. Do you know anything about that, Dad, or is it a foreign feeling for you?”

  “I trust your mom. That’s the only person I needed to worry about.” He looked over his cherry trees and signed. “Didn’t work out as well as I thought it would.”

  “You think?”

  “Your mom and me, we go way back.” He put his hat on and leaned on the railing. “She was the love of my life. Shame she didn’t see me the same way to begin with.”

  Ethan decided to sit and listen. His father wasn’t one for talking normally. He might learn something, figure out why he was the way he was.

  “She didn’t think I was worthy. I was the quiet type. Worked hard, didn’t hang around with the popular kids but I always knew she was there. At school, we talked a bit but on weekends we hung out with different people.” He sniffed, cleared his throat. “She fell for this guy, his name don’t matter none. I could see it was going to end badly. The guy had a reputation around town but your mom wouldn’t listen to anyone, least of all me.”

  Ethan held up his hand. “Dad, you don’t have to tell me all this.” It was getting way too personal quicker than he thought it would.

  “Yeah, I do. I need to explain to you what happened. Maybe if I’d told Rake, he’d still be here. Anyway, my worst fears materialized and he dumped her. She was heartbroken. I found her walking down the road toward the cherry farm one day, all upset and crying. I gave her a lift back here when she said she didn’t want to go home. She was too embarrassed.”

  That sounded like a typical teenage falling out but he kept quiet and let his father talk.

  “She admitted that she was scared. They’d slept together and she was terrified she was pregnant. Wasn’t quite so easy in those days to find out. Not like it is now. I offered to marry her.”

  “You what?” This wasn’t the impression he had of his father, a hero to the rescue of a scorned woman.

  “I liked your mom. A lot. Always had. So I offered to marry her and make a life with her if she was willing to take a chance on me.”

  “But, I thought you were in love with Mari’s mother.” Things were getting far too complicated for him.

  Jeff shrugged his shoulders. “I thought I was too but she didn’t even see me. We were sixteen, Ethan. Kids fall in and out of love all the time at that age. She had her eyes firmly focused on Bill Moore. I wasn’t even in the pic
ture.” He chuckled, remembering. “Nope. Nothing was ever going to come of that pipe dream. It was a story that got embellished over the years when Betty wanted something from me. Money most likely and she’d make up stuff as she went trying to pass herself off as my one great love. We ignored her, wasn’t worth the conversation according to your mom, because we knew the real story.” He sighed and adjusted his cap. “Your mom needed me and I was in a position to help her out and truth be told, I wasn’t above using that as an excuse to get her either. I can’t think of anyone I wanted to be with more than Pearl. Your mom and I had something between us. Call it a deep affection or whatever. We cared about each other and she made a mistake hooking up with that guy. We got a license and headed to the courthouse.”

  “You took on another man’s child?”

  “Rake was mine. From the get-go, I told her that. If she was pregnant, I was the child’s father. No question and she was too emotional to think straight and, to be honest, I did railroad her. Probably would’ve been wise to wait and see if she really was pregnant but I didn’t want to.”

  A new respect rose for his father. “So it was true then, Rake was someone else’s child?”

  “No, as it turned out. She wasn’t expecting but that didn’t matter. Before too long she was and Rake was born, then you followed and that was it.”

  Ethan shook his head. “I don’t get it then. Mari told me that Rake overheard you and Mom fighting about him not being your son.”

  The pain clouded his eyes. “That’d be my fault. I can’t hold in the anger sometimes and once, and only once, I threw that in her face.” He slapped his cap on his leg, looking disgusted. “I only ever did it the one time but it was enough to upset your mom so much I never did it again. I felt like the biggest bag of trash you’ve ever seen. She didn’t deserve it.”

  “So he was definitely your child?”

  “Of course he was. Do the math, Ethan.” Jeff turned and sat on the porch step. “Your mother puts up with a lot from me. Always has but she keeps telling me that I came forward when she needed me so there’s no way she’d walk away from me when I couldn’t control my black moments.”

  His father suffered from depression? How did he not know about that? All kinds of remorse ran through his mind. The dark moods, the evading people and spending time alone in the orchard. It made sense now he knew. “Why didn’t you tell me? I could’ve helped, Dad.”

  Jeff smiled. “You did, Son. Just being who you are helped me. It still does. I’m gutted that I didn’t know what Rake overheard. I could’ve set his mind at rest. I’ll never be able to get those years back. That makes me sadder than ever.”

  “You have a grandson, Dad. I think I blew my chances there but there’s always hope for you. Get Mom to take you over one day and meet Noah. He’s a great kid and keeps asking why you haven’t been to see him. I’m sure Mari would love you to get involved with him.”

  “That’s something else I’ll take the blame for. I should never have said that to you. I’m not proud of what I’ve done, the trouble I’ve caused you. And I don’t expect you to forgive me either but some days I find it hard to stop my mouth running off.”

  Ethan moved down and sat beside his father. “You messed up. No doubt about it but everyone makes mistakes.” He looked out at the night, his mind working fast. “If I’d been half the man you are, I never would have asked her if Noah was mine, no matter what you said to get me thinking otherwise.”

  “But if I hadn’t said it, would you’ve given it any thought?”

  “Maybe. I’ve looked at him and wondered if it were possible.” He reached down and pulled on a piece of grass, shredded it between his fingers as the guilt nipped at his heels. “Rake gave her something I couldn’t because I was too damned stubborn to talk to her and it kills me to admit that I’m jealous of a dead man. And because I was the reason she left. If I’d been true to myself and not acted like an idiot, she never would’ve gone.” He leaned into his father, feeling a connection that had been missing for so long.

  “And I was the one that chased them both away. You weren’t totally to blame. I have a lot to answer for. I’m sorry, Ethan.”

  “Yeah, you do, Dad. But we all make mistakes. Rake chose his own life and there wasn’t anything we could do about it.” They both looked up as Pearl walked down the drive toward them.

  “Son, please keep this to yourself. I’ll talk to your mom later when it’s just the two of us. Don’t want to go embarrassing her more than necessary by telling her you know about it.”

  “Sure, Dad.” Anything to keep the peace. “But I think you have some bridges to mend with Mari, don’t you?”

  “Not sure she’ll want to see me, Son.” He cleared his throat. “But I don’t want to risk her going again, taking the grandson I never knew I had. Guess I’m just going to have to suck it up and go ask forgiveness so I can get to know the young man.”

  Ethan threw away the grass, watched it flutter to the ground. “You know she’s been trying to get in touch with you? Have you checked your cell lately?”

  Jeff looked away, embarrassed.

  “Caused me no end of grief ignoring her, Dad. I suggest you make the effort.”

  “Are you going to go see her, Son?”

  This family had caused her nothing but trouble. Would she even want to see him again after what he’d done to her? He wouldn’t blame her if she didn’t. “I’m going to have to do some soul searching before I do. If I do. We’ve caused her more grief than she should have to deal with.”

  “It’s my fault. Let me go and see her, make things right first. Then you can decide what you want to do and do it with a clean slate.”

  “I have the feeling it’s already too late, Dad. I should’ve fought for her when she kicked me out but I didn’t. I feel as though I’ve failed her again doubting the reason she came home.”

  *

  Mari was cleaning the apartment when there was a knock on the door. “Come in.” She turned off the vacuum and unplugged it.

  Jeff stepped through the door and her heart all but stopped.

  “What do you want, Jeff? If you’re here to have another go at me, forget it.”

  He walked in and stood with the door open. “No. I’ve come to apologize. That’s if you’ll listen, of course. Don’t blame you if you don’t want to bother. I know I’ve done nothing to make you want to hear what I have to say.”

  Mari looked at him, not understanding why he was being so apologetic for the first time ever toward her. “Fine, but the first raised word from you and I’m calling up Keith.” She indicated the couch. “Have a seat.”

  “No thanks. I’d rather stand.” He stepped in further and closed the door. “This is between us and not for the ears of others, if you don’t mind.”

  “Okay.” She pulled out a chair from the kitchen table and sat down and waited for him to talk, hoping this wasn’t going to be more than she was ready for.

  “I hear Ethan asked what kind of access you’ll let him have with Noah if you two don’t make a go of it together. I have to admit to putting that idea of custody in his head. Wrong of me and I have no good reason for doing it except for what happened to me.” He went on to tell her the story he’d told Ethan a couple of days earlier, highlighting the fact that in his opinion, genetics didn’t always make a parent. “I’d appreciate it if you could keep that to yourself. Don’t want to go embarrassing Pearl.”

  Confusion raced through her head. “But, why didn’t you tell Rake this? Why leave it and let him believe he wasn’t your child?”

  “I didn’t know he’d heard me or I would’ve. There was never any question of the boy being mine. But the fact of the matter is, even if he wasn’t, it wouldn’t change the way I felt about him. I was so proud of that kid. He was so determined to succeed. Made up for all that I lacked.”

  “And that’s why you pushed him so hard? To live your life through him.” The old pain started to resurface.

  Jeff shook his head.
“I didn’t mean it like that. I didn’t push him. Didn’t need to. The boy pushed himself more than anyone I know. Overdid it if you ask me but he wouldn’t listen to anyone. He had a drive that would make most men quiver in their boots. If I’d known he overheard me I would’ve understood, but Pearl and me, we thought it was just his hormones kicking in, you know? Once he hit sixteen or seventeen, he’d changed. Got moody and didn’t talk so much anymore, much like I was as a teenager. Thought it was normal.”

  “That’s when he heard you fighting.” She swallowed. So much pain over something so stupid. “My God, such senseless loss.”

  “Yeah. It is. And I don’t want the same to happen between you and Ethan. He’s a good man, Mari. He deserves to be happy.”

  “That’s between me and Ethan.” How on earth was she going to fix that?

  She’d hurt him. Run out on him once, kicked him out when he asked the question which, as she’d thought since it’d happened, he had every right to ask. It wasn’t as though she gave him any reason to believe everything she did and said to him. Not after leaving without a word. It was probably too late now. Oh, the twisted webs they wove.

  “Tell me, why were you so hard on me then if you didn’t want my mother? You made my life hell back then and I thought it was because she chose someone else.”

  “You mother was never for me. I wasn’t exciting enough and I certainly wasn’t into drugs in those days.” He held up his hand when she tried to protest. “Not that your father was either but he had more money than I did. Guess that made him more appealing.”

  “Maybe.” But something still bothered her.

  “There was never anything between your mom and me. It was all a ploy to try and make me help her when she needed money, is all.”

  “So why treat me the way you did then? I’d done nothing to you.”

  He gazed into her eyes. “I reacted badly, I know that. But because you were so much better than she was, I guess I was worried you’d go down the same path being as you’re her daughter. That’s why, when Pearl said you needed someone, I suggested we take you in. You were bright and caring. Your future was just waiting for you to find it. And then you left. Not that I blamed you. I lashed out and I’m sorry.”