Rosanna's Gift

by Susan Lantz Simpson

  “Shhh!” Rosanna yanked open the back door and stuck her head out. “Kandi?”

  The woman stopped in mid-stride and whipped her head around. Long silver earrings swung on either side of her head. “Oh, Rosanna, you startled me.”

  “I’m sorry. Would you kumm in this way, please?”

  “Sure. If that’s what you want.”

  Rosanna wondered how Kandi walked in the pointy-toed, high-heeled boots without wobbling or twisting an ankle. What use would such things be in the ice or snow? She supposed they must be designed for style rather than function. “I-I wasn’t expecting you today.” Did that sound too rude?

  “I couldn’t exactly pick up a phone and call you to arrange a visit.”

  “I suppose not, but Mamm did give you a number where you could leave a message.”

  The other woman merely shrugged.

  “It’s awfully cold today. Kumm get warm by the stove.” Rosanna figured Kandi must be extra cold in her way-too-short skirt and thin leopard print jacket that barely came to her waist. A poke to her back made her remember her manners. “Kandi, this is my freind Emma. We were just having tea and cookies. Won’t you join us?” She didn’t mention that they’d nearly finished their tea and Emma had scarfed down all the cookies on the plate. She could always pour more tea and retrieve cookies from the jar.

  Kandi picked her way up the steps and sashayed into the mudroom. Rosanna scarcely kept from choking on the nearly overpowering floral scent that filled the room like fog. Emma actually did cough and gulped when Rosanna elbowed her.

  “It certainly is a frosty day.” Kandi gave an exaggerated shiver.

  “Well, you don’t have on a very heavy coat.” Emma’s mumble earned her another jab from Rosanna.

  “There’s hot water in the kettle. I can pour you tea or kaffi to help you warm up.” Rosanna gave Emma a stern look before pointing Kandi toward the kitchen. She really couldn’t be upset with Emma, though. Her freind merely voiced Rosanna’s own thoughts.

  “I came to see Mollie, and I don’t have a lot of time.”

  “Of course. Mollie should be waking up from her nap any second.”

  “She’s always sleeping when I get here.”

  “Bopplin tend to sleep a gut bit,” Emma muttered.

  Rosanna frowned in Emma’s direction but wanted to smile. “Would you like something to drink while you wait?”

  Kandi huffed out a sigh. “I guess, if you won’t wake her up.”

  “She’ll be in a more receptive mood if she wakes up on her own.”

  Kandi shoved up a sleeve to expose the watch surrounded by four clinking bangle bracelets circling her wrist. “I can wait a little while, but not too long. I’ll take a cup of tea. As usual, I’ve had enough coffee to float a battleship.”

  “Sure. Have a seat at the table. I’ll only be a minute. Would you like some cookies?” Rosanna set another mug on the counter. “Is regular tea okay, or do you prefer herbal?”

  “Regular. That herbal stuff is nasty.”

  Rosanna poured hot water over the tea bag and set the mug in front of her guest. She slid sugar and honey across the table and added cookies to the empty plate in case Kandi decided she wanted a snack. With nothing else to do, she dropped onto the chair next to Emma and sat on her hands to keep from fidgeting.

  “Oops!” Kandi’s vigorous stirring caused tea to slosh over the side of the mug.

  “Don’t worry about it.” Rosanna passed a couple of paper napkins across the table.

  Kandi dabbed at the spill and stirred some more before finally removing the spoon from the mug. She sat back in the chair and ran a hand through her platinum hair.

  On closer inspection, Rosanna thought the hair resembled a bristly dish-scrubbing pad rather than cotton candy. She rummaged through her brain to find a neutral topic of conversation. Did the other two women feel the oppressive tension in the room, or was it just her? “Do you have to work tonight, Kandi?”

  “Yeah. I have a rehearsal for a play that I’m in, and then I have to dance at one of the bigger clubs downtown.” She chomped and popped her gum.

  “You certainly have a busy schedule.”

  “I don’t always have two things in one night, so I wouldn’t always be away from Mollie most of the evening.”

  Icy fingers squeezed Rosanna’s heart. Kandi still planned to take the boppli to the city, where she’d be left with strangers for hours on end and possibly all night? Rosanna’s gut wrenched, and she half expected the oatmeal cookies she had eaten to reappear at any moment. “Y-you s-still . . . ?” Rosanna couldn’t even get the words out.

  Kandi made an especially loud popping noise with her gum before gulping the steaming tea. Rosanna winced. That tea had to be nearly boiling hot. How did Kandi swallow it without yelping in pain? Her own throat would have been on fire. She knew a horrified expression must have crossed her face.

  Kandi burst out laughing, almost spraying tea everywhere. “You should see your face!” She slapped the table with one palm. “Your expression is priceless. I should record it for that funniest video show.” She ran an index finger under each eye, smudging the black eye makeup and giving herself a raccoon face. “Trust me. I’m used to drinking super-hot beverages. With my crazy hours, I down a lot of hot coffee to get myself going when I have to be up early.”

  “Oh.” That’s all Rosanna could utter. So who would get up early to change and feed Mollie?

  “And to answer what I think you were about to ask me earlier, I haven’t gotten any legal papers drawn up yet.”

  Rosanna let out the breath that had stalled somewhere between her lungs and nose. Hope surged, only to be dashed by Kandi’s next words.

  “That doesn’t mean I’m not planning to. I just haven’t been up in time, uh, had the time to see a lawyer yet.”

  “Do you have someone to watch Mollie at night while you work? I imagine a nighttime babysitter would be harder to find.” Emma asked the question Rosanna couldn’t get out.

  “Not specifically, but I can probably get whichever of the girls I know who doesn’t have a gig that particular night to babysit. We all help each other out.”

  Mollie wouldn’t even have the security of a consistent babysitter. The poor little girl wouldn’t have any stability in her life at all.

  “Do some of the other girls have kinner, I mean, children?” Emma must have been reading her mind. Rosanna wondered the same thing. She couldn’t decide if having other little ones around would be a plus or a minus.

  “A few of them do.”

  “So you’ve helped them care for their children while they worked?” At least that would have given her a little experience.

  Kandi threw up her hands. “Oh no! Not me! Changing diapers and cleaning up messes.” Kandi paused and wrinkled up her nose. “Well, that’s just not my thing.”

  Did she think Mollie could change her own diapers and clean up after herself? Emma poked Rosanna’s leg beneath the table, almost causing her to flinch. “Well, Mollie . . .”

  “I know. Mollie wears diapers, and I’d have to clean her up when I’m home, but that’s different. Mollie is family.”

  When she’s home? Who would be raising Mollie while Kandi pursued her dream of fame and fortune? Tears burned in Rosanna’s eyes. She looked down and blinked hard. Surely Kandi would change her mind and wouldn’t want a boppli to interfere with her plans. “L-little ones tend to do better with a routine.”

  “Aw, kids are resilient. They can adapt to anything.” Kandi resumed the gum smacking. She made a big show of looking at her watch. “Do you think the little rug rat is about ready to get up?”

  Rug rat? Her sweet little angel was not a rug rat. “I’ll go check on her.” Rosanna focused on walking normally and not stomping off in frustration and anger. The sight of Mollie stretching and smiling instantly calmed her. “How’s my precious girl? Did you have a nice nap?”

  “Oh good, she’s up.”

  Rosanna hadn’t been aware that Ka
ndi had trailed along behind her. “It looks like she just woke up. Would you like to change her?” Rosanna swallowed a chuckle when Kandi jumped back a foot.

  “No, that’s quite all right.”

  “It’s really not that hard. I’ll show you.”

  “You go right ahead. I’ll take a rain check on that lesson.”

  Rosanna babbled to Mollie as she quickly changed the diaper. “Are you hungry, little one?” Rosanna lifted the infant from the cradle. “Let’s go get your bottle.” She brushed past Kandi on her return to the kitchen. Emma stood right inside the door with a hand clamped over her mouth. Rosanna could see that her freind would burst out laughing with any slight provocation. She had to avert her gaze to keep from laughing herself. If Emma made the tiniest snort, she’d dissolve into a gale of giggles.

  Rosanna elbowed Emma as she passed by on her way to prepare a bottle. She shifted Mollie to her left arm but then decided to see if Kandi wanted to hold a clean, dry infant. After all, she drove all the way from Washington, DC, or whatever suburb she lived in. Surely she didn’t make the trip to look at Mollie from a distance. How could she hope to raise the little girl if she didn’t want to hold her or change her or feed her? “Would you like to hold her while I make her bottle, or would you rather do the bottle? I’ll tell you what to do.”

  “I-I guess I can hold her. Let me sit down first.” Kandi plopped onto the chair she’d recently vacated. She tugged at the short skirt. Apprehension wrinkled her brow.

  “You have held her before, ain’t so?” Emma spoke from the doorway, where she watched in obvious amusement.

  Rosanna frowned at her, but she knew Emma would not likely pay a bit of attention to her. “Kandi held Mollie the last time she visited.”

  “For a few minutes, and she cried like I had pinched her or something.”

  Rosanna saw Emma’s gaze fly to Kandi’s long, red-painted fingernails. She quirked an eyebrow. Rosanna had to say something fast before Emma threw out her next barb. “It’s just that you were unfamiliar to her. Are you ready?” Rosanna shuffled closer to the table.

  “Shouldn’t you feed her first so she doesn’t start wailing?”

  “I need to fix her bottle. Then you can feed her.”

  “What if she pukes on my clothes? Eww! Then I’d have to drive home like that, and I probably won’t have time to change before my rehearsal.”

  “I can put a cloth over your clothes.”

  “Why don’t you go ahead and feed her?”

  “Okay, but you can hold her while I get the bottle ready.” Before Kandi could protest further, Rosanna placed Mollie in the other woman’s arms. She made sure Kandi got a gut grip on the infant before she turned away. Honestly, a grown woman was afraid of a boppli? Rosanna couldn’t fathom such a notion. She heard Kandi mumbling but couldn’t decipher the words.

  “Are you about ready? She’s squirmy.” Kandi’s voice rose a notch or two in volume and pitch.

  Rosanna shook the bottle on her way back to the table and held it out to Kandi.

  The woman jerked back so hard she shook the chair and startled Mollie, who let out a shriek. Kandi held a whimpering Mollie out toward Rosanna. “See, I told you she cries with me. Maybe if you’d fed her first she wouldn’t have hollered.”

  “Maybe if you hadn’t jerked so hard you wouldn’t have scared her,” Emma offered.

  Kandi ignored Emma. “Here. Take her. I need to go anyway.” She held the infant even farther away from her. Mollie’s whimpering turned into sobbing.

  Rosanna set the bottle on the table and gathered the boppli close. “It’s okay, my precious one.” She gently swayed to and fro until Mollie calmed.

  As soon as her arms were free, Kandi jumped to her feet. “I’ve got to go.” She pulled at her skirt and jacket to straighten them. “Traffic is a nightmare, you know, and I can’t be late for my rehearsal.” Her high-heeled boots clacked across the linoleum floor. “I’ll let myself out. Bye, Mollie.” She brushed past Emma and headed toward the mudroom.

  “Bye,” Rosanna called to the air. She lowered herself onto a chair and offered Mollie the bottle. She stared openmouthed at Emma.

  When the back door slammed, Emma broke the silence. “She probably could have gotten away even faster if she hadn’t been balancing on those stilts.”

  Rosanna burst out laughing, releasing the nervous tension that had risen to an almost intolerable level. Mollie stopped sucking and smiled around the nipple in her mouth. “Emma is awful, isn’t she, Mollie?”

  “Nee, Emma is truthful. How does that woman think she can care for an infant if she doesn’t even want to hold her or change her? Did you see her expression when you handed Mollie to her? She looked like you handed her a copperhead.” Emma imitated Kandi’s expression, sending both young women into peals of laughter.

  Rosanna gulped in air as she raised Mollie to her shoulder and patted her back. “Emma Kurtz, you should be ashamed of yourself.”

  “For telling the truth? Rosanna, I truly don’t think that Cotton Candy girl will pursue custody, even if she does feel a pang of conscience since Mollie is her niece.”

  “I don’t know, Emma. People sometimes do strange things.”

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Rosanna greeted each day with a shiver of fear. Would this be the day she received notification that Kandi had filed for custody of Mollie? Sundays were the only days she awoke with peace in her heart. As far as she knew, Englisch lawyers did not work on Sundays, and there would not be any mail delivery. Rosanna could completely enjoy the day and every moment with Mollie, her family, and her community.

  She had begun to feel more comfortable with the other young mudders, and many of her single freinden made a point to speak to her and Mollie. Some, like Emma, encouraged her to take part in their activities. Right now, though, Rosanna felt she had to exhibit exemplary behavior. She had to act mature at all times and be a perfect mamm. She couldn’t risk anyone official showing up unexpectedly to catch her romping around with the other young people.

  “We need you to even out the volleyball teams.” Emma jogged over to Rosanna after the common meal on Sunday.

  “It’s cold outside. I think I’ll take Mollie in the house.” The three-hour church service and meal afterward had been held in a neighbor’s big barn. Once folks had finished eating and drifted off in clumps to talk, the temperature in the barn had plummeted. Most mudders headed to the warm house with their little ones.

  “You’ll get warm when you start playing. Your mamm will watch Mollie for a little while, ain’t so?”

  “I’m sure she would, but I don’t want to ask her to do that. Mollie is my responsibility.”

  “I understand, but you can still do something fun. I don’t think anyone here will report that you abandoned your boppli or anything like that.”

  “I know, but I still worry.”

  “Women still have lives even after they have kinner.”

  “I know that, too, but their priorities change. You’ll find out.”

  “Okay, Rosanna. I won’t press you. Do what you’re comfortable with.” Emma squeezed Rosanna’s arm. “How about if I join you and Mollie inside?”

  Rosanna smiled. Emma was such a dear freind. “That’s nice of you, Emma, but you go ahead and play. You love volleyball. When your game is over or you get too cold, then you can visit with me.”

  “I don’t know. I don’t want you to be alone.”

  “I won’t be. Please, go on and play.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Absolutely. See you later.” Rosanna turned and headed for the house. She didn’t want Emma to sacrifice her fun with the other young folks. If she stayed there talking, Emma would miss the game altogether, and Mollie might get too cold.

  Most of the older women had gathered in the kitchen to chat. The younger women sat in the living room with their young kinner, who played quietly on the floor. Some had already been put down for naps in a bedroom.

  “Ah! It feels
so nice in here.” Rosanna hurried into the warmth of the living room.

  “Kumm sit by the stove.” Katie Yoder eased herself and her sleeping infant from the rocking chair closest to the big woodstove.

  “You don’t have to get up, Katie.” Rosanna held out a hand to stop the pretty young woman, who was probably only a year or two older than she was.

  “I’ve been sitting here for awhile. Joanna and I are sufficiently toasted. Here.” She patted the chair.

  “Danki.” Katie’s thoughtful gesture warmed Rosanna’s heart. Katie had always been kind to the younger girls when they were all scholars. Maybe Joanna and Mollie would be freinden one day—that is, if Mollie wasn’t snatched from her. Rosanna returned Katie’s smile. She would not think worrisome thoughts today.

  * * *

  It had been a pleasant day. Darkness crept in early, like a shade slowly pulled down over a window. Tobias had left for the singing a short time ago. Rosanna knew he was probably glad to go without her so he could do as he pleased and not be responsible for bringing her home. Maybe he and Emma would slip out for a ride afterward. Rosanna smiled.

  She sank wearily onto the cushioned rocking chair with her knitting bag in her lap. She had fed Mollie and tucked her into her crib for the night. What a blessing that she had been sleeping through the night for several weeks now. Rosanna still awoke several times to check on her but figured one day she would sleep through the night herself.

  She sighed and set the chair rocking. If she wasn’t careful, she might rock herself to sleep. She’d try to knit a few more rows on the afghan she’d been stitching for ages before seeking out her own bed.

  “Tired, Dochder?” Samuel peered at her over the top of the Budget, the Plain newspaper he’d buried himself in. Sarah sat beside him on the couch with her own knitting needles clacking out a soft rhythm.

  “I am. I’ll probably go to bed soon.”

  “You could have gone to the singing. We’d have been more than happy to watch Mollie.” Sarah paused to glance up at Rosanna.

  “I know, Mamm. I’m content to stay home tonight.” She pulled her needles out of the ball of yarn and began knitting. With fatigue blurring her vision, she hoped she wouldn’t make a mess that she’d have to yank out the next time she attempted to knit. She’d been trying to cast her cares upon the Lord, but she still often awoke in a panic and lay praying that Mollie wouldn’t be taken from her. She settled into a rocking and knitting rhythm until a knock at the front door made her drop a stitch.