My Valentine

by Tracie Peterson

  Abraham shook his head. “There is nothing between us that must cause us to part. Come with me today and I believe you will come to understand my choice. In time, you may well come to make that choice for yourself and when you do, I want to be at your side.”

  Darlene stared at the table rather than meet her father’s joyous expression. How could she be so sad when he was obviously so happy? How could she, who had listened to the words and advice of her father for all of her life, now reject his words because they seemed rash and contradictory to everything he had taught her?

  “Please come with me today.”

  His pleading was more than she could bear. In that moment Darlene knew that should she be forever branded a traitor, she would still go with her father wherever he asked her to go. “I’ll come with you,” she whispered in a voice that barely contained her grief.

  Abraham leaned over and kissed her on the head. “Thank you, my little soul. You are all that is left to me on this earth.”

  

  Darlene was still thinking about his words when the Blackwells’ carriage arrived and Dennison Blackwell stepped down to greet them. Darlene had put on her best gown, a pale-blue muslin with huge gigot sleeves and lace trimming around the neck. It was a simple dress, yet it was her finest. In her mind she had imagined Pierce taking her by the arm to lead her into his church, and it was then that she wanted to look her very best.

  “Good morning, Abraham, Darlene,” Dennison said in greeting. “Have you ever known a more perfect day?”

  “It is very lovely,” Abraham said, then took hold of Darlene’s arm. “My daughter will come with us today. Is there room in your carriage?” He looked up at the open landau where Eugenia and Constance Blackwell sat on one side, while Pierce occupied the other.

  Dennison was at first quite surprised, but quickly enough a broad smile crossed his face. “There is plenty of room and you are very welcome to come with us, my dear.”

  Darlene felt her heart give a lurch when Pierce stood up and held out a hand to assist her up. “We’re very glad to have you join us,” he announced, while Eugenia gave her a harsh look of disdain. “You may sit here with Constance and my Aunt Eugenia.”

  Darlene put her gloved hand in his and allowed him to help her into the carriage. Eugenia looked away, while Constance smiled most congenially and made room for Darlene to sit in the middle. Abraham took his place between Pierce and Dennison and without further fanfare, they were on their way.

  Immediately, Darlene was painfully aware of the contrast to her best gown and the Blackwell women’s Sunday best. Constance wore a beautiful gown of pink watered silk. The trimmings alone were worth more than Darlene’s entire dress. Tiny seed pearls decorated the neckline and heavy flounces of lace trimmed the sleeves and skirt. Her hair had been delicately arranged in a pile of curls and atop this was a smart-looking little hat complete with feathers and ribbons. A dainty pink parasol was over one shoulder to shade her from the sun and around her throat lay a strand of pearls, all perfectly white and equally sized.

  Eugenia, of course, was attired even more regally in mauve-colored satin. Darlene tried not to feel out of place, but it was obvious to anyone who looked at her that she felt completely beneath the standing of her companions.

  Dennison introduced her to his sister and daughter, but only Constance had anything to say. “It’s so nice to have you with us.”

  “Indeed it is,” Pierce said with great enthusiasm.

  

  The church service was unlike anything Darlene had ever known. Thewomen and men sat together for one thing, and somehow Pierce hadmanaged to have her seated between himself and Constance. She was very aware of his presence. The smell of his cologne wafted through her head like a delicate reminder of her dreams. She couldn’t suppress the fantasies that came to her mind and while they joined in to sing and share a hymnal, Darlene wondered what it might be like to marry Pierce and do this every Sunday.

  What am I thinking? She admonished herself for such thoughts, while in the next moment her heart betrayed her again. To be the wife of Pierce Blackwell would mean every manner of comfort and luxury. It would mean having gowns of silk and satin. It would mean never having to worry about whether enough suits were made to pay the rent and grocer. She stole a side glance at Pierce. He caught her eye and winked, continuing the hymn in his deep baritone voice. Marriage to such a man would also mean love. Of this she had no doubt. Pierce Blackwell would make a most attentive husband.

  The minister began his sermon by praying a blessing upon the congregation. Darlene watched for a moment, then bowed her head and listened to his words.

  “Heavenly Father, we ask your blessing upon this congregation. We seek Your will. We seek to know You better. We ask that You would open our hearts to the truth, that we might serve You more completely. Amen.”

  Well, Darlene thought, that wasn’t so bad. She relaxed a bit. Maybe this wasn’t going to be such an ordeal, after all.

  The minister, a short, older man, seemed not that different from the cantor. He wore a simple black suit and while he had no beard, his muttonchop sideburns were full and gave the appearance of at least a partial beard.

  “It is good to come into the house of the Lord,” he began. His words were of love and of a deep joy he found in God. Darlene couldn’t help but be drawn to his happiness.

  “God’s love is evident to us in many ways,” the minister continued. “God watches us with the guarded jealousy of a Father to His child. You fathers in the congregation would not allow a thief to sneak into your homes and steal your children from under your watchful eye, and neither does God allow Satan to sneak in and steal their hearts and souls.

  “Just as you provide for your children, so God provides for us, His children. If your child was lost, you would seek him. If he was cold, you would warm him. If your son or daughter was hungry, you would give your last crumb of bread to feed them. So it is with God. He longs to give us good things and to care for us in His abundance.” Darlene was mesmerized.

  “God wills that none should be lost. He gave us His Son Jesus Christ as a gift of love. Seeing that we were hopelessly lost, separated by a huge cavern of sin and despair, God sent his Son Jesus, to reconcile us to the Father. Is there anyone here who would not try to rescue your child from a burning house? Would any of you stand idly by and watch your children drown? Of course not. And neither would God stand by and watch us sink into the hopeless mire of sin and death, without offering us rescue.

  “But what if you reached out a rope to your drowning child and they refused to take it? What if you tore open a passage in the burning house, but your child refused to come forward? So it is with God, who extends to us salvation through Jesus Christ, only to have us refuse to accept His gift.” Darlene felt as though the minister was speaking to her alone. She’d never heard such words before. No wonder her father found himself confused. No wonder he questioned his faith.

  “Will you be such a child?” the minister asked. “When God has offered you a perfectly good way back to Him, will you reject it? Will you throw off the lifeline God has given you in His Son? Will you die without knowing Christ as your Savior?”

  Darlene could hardly bear the now-serious expression on the minister’s face. He seemed to look right at her and, inside her gloves, Darlene could feel perspiration form on her hands. She wanted to get up from her seat and flee from the building, but she couldn’t move. Should the building have caught fire and burned down around her, Darlene knew that it would have been impossible to leave.

  The minister spoke a short time more, then directed those who would receive Christ to step forward and publicly declare their repentance. Her mouth dropped when Abraham stood. She had known he would do this, but somehow watching it all happen, she didn’t know what to think. A kind of despair and trepidation washed over her. It was as if in that moment she knew a wall had been put in place to forever separate her from her beloved Tateh. A wall that she could only remov
e if she accepted Christ for herself.

  As if sensing her fears, Pierce put her hand over hers and gave it a squeeze. This gesture touched Darlene in a way she couldn’t explain. It was as if he knew her heart, and that somehow made it better. Does he understand my loss? she wondered.

  Hearing a confession of faith from the man who had nurtured her so protectively, Darlene felt all at once as though he’d become a stranger to her. And yet, was it this that disturbed her most? Or was it the words of the minister? Words that made more sense than she would have liked to admit?

  

  The ride back home was spent in animated conversation between Dennison and Abraham, and Pierce and Constance. Eugenia remained stubbornlysilent, while Darlene felt her mind travel in a million directions. All of which brought her continuously back to the dazzling smile and penetrating brown eyes of Pierce Blackwell.

  “I’m glad you took time from the shop to accompany us today,” Pierce told her.

  “Do you work in your father’s shop?” Constance asked in completesurprise.

  Darlene nodded. “Yes. I do sewing for him.”

  “How marvelous. Tell me all about it,” Constance insisted.

  Eugenia harrumphed in obvious disgust and with that simple gesture, Darlene saw all her girlish dreams of marriage to Pierce fade. Of course, there had never been any real possibility of a lowly Jewess marrying a rich Christian socialite, but she had felt at least comforted by the possibility.

  “My father is a tailor, as you know. We make suits and shirts, just about anything a man could possibly need for dressing.”

  “And they do it very well,” Pierce added. “I have never owned such fine clothes.”

  “And you work with your father? Did you help with my brother’s suit?” Constance asked, completely fascinated by this.

  Darlene eyed the rich-green frock coat and nodded. Pierce’s gaze met hers and his lips curled automatically into a smile. “I didn’t know that,” he said, running his hand down the sleeve of his coat. “It only makes it all the more special.”

  Darlene felt her face grow hot. It made it special to her as well. She could remember running her hand down the fabric and wondering what Pierce would look like when it was completed. She had sewed the buttons onto the front with a strange sort of reverence, imagining as she worked how Pierce’s fingers might touch them later.

  “How wonderful to do something so unique!” Constance declared.

  “It is hardly unique to do a servant’s labor,” Eugenia finally said. With these words came a silence in the carriage and a sinking in Darlene’s heart.

  Dennison frowned and Eugenia, seeming to sense that her opinion would meet with his disapproval, fell silent again. The damage was done, however. Darlene grew sullen and quiet, while Pierce looked away as if disgusted by the reminder of her station in life. There would never be a bridge between their worlds and the sooner Darlene accepted that, the happier she would be. But even forcing thoughts of Pierce from her mind did nothing to dispel the stirring memory of the minister’s words that morning. Nor would it displace the image of her father going forward into acceptance of Jesus as Messiah. There was no going back now. There would be no chance of changing her father’s mind about Christianity. But what worried Darlene more was that she wasn’t sure she still wanted to change his mind.

  Chapter 11

  But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable,gentle, and easy to be intreated, full of mercy and good fruits,without partiality, and without hypocrisy.

  James 3:17

  Pierce listened with bored indifference to Amanda Ralston’s description of the new art museum her father had arranged to be built. The truth of the matter was, he was bored with the entire party. Amanda’s party. Amanda and all her shallow, haughty friends.

  The only reason he’d even come was that Eugenia had insisted on the matter until there was simply no peace in the house and even his father had asked him to do it as a favor to him. So it was because of this, Pierce found himself the center of Amanda’s possessive attention.

  “Darling, you haven’t had any champagne,” Amanda said with a coy batting of her eyes.

  “I don’t drink champagne and you know that full well.” He tried not to frown at her. No sense having anyone believe them to be fighting.

  Amanda pouted. “But then how shall we toast our evening?”

  Pierce looked at her and shrugged. “I have nothing to toast, my dear. Why don’t you go find someone who does?”

  Amanda refused to be dealt with so harshly. “I had this gown made especially with you in mind. Don’t you think it’s lovely?” She held up her glass and whirled in a circle. The heavy gold brocade rippled in movement.

  “It looks very warm,” he said noncommittally. “I’m certain it will ward off the autumn chill.”

  Amanda was clearly losing patience with him. “Pierce, this gown cost over sixty dollars. The least you could do is lie about it, even if you don’t like it.”

  “I see no reason to lie about it, and the gown is quite perfect for you. Sixty dollars seems a bit much. I know a great tailor, if your seamstress insists on robbing you.”

  “Oh, bother with you,” she said, stomping her foot. “You are simply no fun at all.”

  “I didn’t come here to have fun. I came because you and my aunt decided it should be so. There would have been no rest in my house if I’d refused.”

  “But Pierce,” she said in a low seductive whisper, “didn’t you want to see me? Don’t you enjoy keeping company with me?”

  Pierce looked at her in hard indifference. “I’d rather be mucking out stables.”

  “That’s hideous!” She raised her arm as if to slap him, then thought better of it and stormed off. Pierce saw her exchange her half-empty glass for a full one before moving out of the room.

  The rest of the evening passed in bits of conversation with one group and then another. Pierce, finally relieved of Amanda’s annoying presence, found a moment in which to discuss westward expansion with severalother men.

  “It seems to me that we must settle this nation of ours or lose it,” a broad-shouldered man with red hair was saying. “There’s plenty who would take it from us. I say we move off the Indians and pay people to settle out west. Give them the land for free, although not too much land. Just enough to spark an interest.”

  “How would you move them all there?” asked an elderly gentleman. “There’s not a decent road in this country. Even the civilized towns suffer for want of better roadways.”

  “True enough,” said Pierce. “Perhaps the government could develop it. There’s surely enough money in the U.S. coffers to plow a few roads.”

  The redheaded man nodded. “Even so, it would take months, years, to make decent roads. We need people in the West now!”

  His enthusiasm gave fuel to the spark already within Pierce’s heart. “I’ve allowed myself some investments in Chicago. I’ve given strong thought to the possibilities of life there.” This caused his companions to stare open-mouthed at him.

  “You don’t mean to include yourself in such a thing?” the older man questioned.

  “Why certainly, I do.” Pierce couldn’t figure out why they should so adamantly declare the need for people in the West, yet find it unreasonable that he would consider such a thing.

  “No, no. That would never do. You would have to deal with all manner of corruption and lowlife.”

  Pierce eyed the old man with a raised brow. “And I don’t have to here? New York City is worse than ten western cities put together. Greed runs so rampant in this town that a man would sell his own soul if it promised a high enough return.”

  The redheaded man laughed at this. “Well, buying your soul out of hock seems a great deal easier than uprooting yourself and leaving the comforts of home behind. Monetary investments are one thing. Flesh and blood is quite another.”

  Pierce smiled. “I couldn’t agree with you more. It is exactly for those reasons that I
consider the possibilities of such a move.”

  It was then that Amanda chose to reappear. “What move are you talking about, darling?” She placed her hand possessively on Pierce’s arm.

  “It seems your friend would like to move out amongst the savages.” The older man chuckled while the redheaded man continued. “I can just picture you at his side, Amanda dear. Dirt floors dusting the hems of your expensive gowns, six children grabbing at your skirts.”

  Amanda’s laughter filled the air. “Oh, certainly Mr. Blackwell is making sport of the subject. He has too much here in the city to ever go too far. Isn’t that true, darling?”

  Pierce shook his head. “No, actually I’m quite seriously considering the move. Perhaps when spring comes and the weather allows for long-distance travel, I will resettle myself in Chicago.”

  “You can’t be serious, Pierce.” Her facade of genteel refinement vanished.

  “I’ve only been telling you of my interest for months now.”

  Amanda waited until the other gentlemen had considerately moved away. She pulled Pierce along with her to a balcony off the main room and turned, prepared for a fight.

  “Pierce, this is ridiculous. Your aunt assures me that it is your father’s wish you marry and produce heirs. Now, while I have no desire to find myself in such a confining predicament, I would see fit to participate at least once in such a matter.”

  Pierce laughed. “Are you talking about giving life to a child, or suffering through a party for fewer than sixteen people?”

  “This is a matter of grave importance; I won’t stand your insults.”

  “Indeed it is a matter of grave importance.” Pierce almost felt sorry for the young woman. She was clearly in a rage of her own creation. Her face was flushed and her eyes blazed with a fire all their own. She would have been pretty had she not been so conniving and self-centered. “Please hear me, Amanda. I have no desire to marry you. Not now. Not ever. I am not in love with you, which is the most important thing I believe a marriage should have. Without a mutual love and respect for each other, marriage would be nothing more than a sham of convenience. That kind of thing is not for me.”