Series Starter : Firsts in Series Collection

by Kaylee Ryan

  “Your mom made a big-ass pan of lasagna, you hungry?”

  “Always,” he says, keeping his attention on Lexi.

  I stand to go make us both a plate. I wish Kinley would’ve eaten before she went to sleep. “You good?”

  “We got this, Daddy,” Aaron says in a girly voice, moving Lexi’s arm, telling me to go away.

  I fight the urge to run upstairs and see if Kinley has fallen asleep yet. I can’t go to her while Aaron is here. I know for a fact I don’t have the kind of willpower needed to not steal another kiss or a simple touch, not when she’s curled up in my bed, her long brown hair spread out on my pillow. Nope, definitely not going upstairs.

  Aaron eats his plate of lasagna with one hand, refusing to put Lexi down. She’s still wide-awake. “I think this is the longest she’s been awake at one time.”

  “You know why, don’t you?”

  “Enlighten me, old wise one.”

  Aaron tsks like I should know the answer. “She refuses to miss out on any Uncle Aaron time, duh,” he says.

  I don’t bother to argue with him, because to be honest, I have no clue. He could be right. Could be that my little girl already knows her Uncle Aaron is going to be a big part of her life. Kinley said babies are perceptive.

  “I think it’s time to give her back,” Aaron says, scrunching up his nose.

  “Again? How can you have anything left, kid?” I ask my daughter as I take her from Aaron.

  “I got to get up early anyway. Looks like you are on your own until Kinley wakes up. She’s a bear when you wake her up, so I would not advise it if I were you.” He laughs his way out the door.

  After getting Lexi changed, I make her a bottle. She went longer this time between feedings. By the time she’s finished, she’s sound asleep. I carry her up to her room and ease her into her bed. Reaching over, I turn on the baby monitor. Leaving the door open so I can hear her, I head to my room. Kinley is curled in a ball, my t-shirt riding high on her thighs. Careful to not make any noise, I set the baby monitor down on the opposite side of the bed and turn it on high. No way do I want to miss hearing Lexi wake up. I’m a little nervous with her being in the other room, but she’s just right across the hall. I refuse to let her sleep with me after all the horror stories I’ve read. Slipping out of my jeans, I place my cell phone on the nightstand and pull my shirt over my head. Without a second of hesitation, I slide into bed, pulling the covers up and over both of us. I lay there, stiff as a rail, staring at the ceiling. I’m tired beyond words, but can’t seem to let sleep claim me when I’m lying here next to Kinley.

  Finally, after staring at the shadows on the ceiling, wasting away precious hours of rest I could be getting while Lexi is sleeping, I start to drift off. It’s also in this exact moment that Kinley decides to roll over. And by roll over, I don’t mean just to face me. No, she rolls over and pushes her tight little body next to mine. On instinct, I wrap my arm around her and pull her close.

  Suddenly, I’m once again wide-awake.

  I tell myself I’m just going to hold her. That I’m going to enjoy having her this close to me. That gets shot all to hell when I run my hand through her silky hair. It’s so damn soft, not to mention the simple movement causes Kinley to burrow further into me. Stroking her hair leads to my fingers trailing ever so softly up and down her back. My heart is pounding in my chest just from this simple act. That shows me right there how much she affects me. Never before has this happened.

  Only McKinley.

  There are a million reasons why what I’m doing is wrong. There is only one that tells me it’s right, and that’s the way my heart is racing. I block out all the questions running through my mind, all of them but one. How soft is her skin? Without further thought, I slide my hand up underneath her t-shirt—my t-shirt. I run my bare hands up and down her back until my hand connects with silk.

  Silk fucking panties.

  That’s it.

  Silk panties and my shirt are all that cover this gorgeous girl.

  Fuck me!

  Chapter 26

  McKinley

  I wake to the feeling of warm hands softly caressing my back. Keeping my eyes closed, I focus on even breathing. I don’t want to give him a reason to stop touching me. I know when I wake up, this will all be over.

  I’m not ready for it to be over.

  My wish is short-lived when Evan’s hand suddenly stills on the small of my back. He doesn’t move and neither do I, at least not until he moves his hand.

  “Don’t stop,” I whisper into the darkness.

  I hold my breath while I wait to see what he’ll do. Is he going to stop? Push me away? It only takes about thirty seconds for me to get my answer when I feel the heat of his hand connect once again with my skin.

  I exhale at his touch. My hand, which rests on his rock-hard abs, begins its own journey. Evan Chamberlin is a work of art. His body looks as though it has been chiseled to perfection. His is not your average six pack. He has actual peaks and valleys that my fingers slowly trail over. He pulls me closer, if that’s even possible. The fact that he wants me next to him has me placing a featherlight kiss on his chest. As soon as my lips make contact, I hear him suck in a breath.

  “McKinley.” My name falls from his lips.

  Lifting my head, I peer up at him. His hand still under my shirt, it slides up and circles the back of my neck. His chest rapidly rises and falls, its rhythm matching my own. Lifting myself further, with the guidance of his hand, our lips meet. He kisses me, soft and leisurely at first; that is until I trace his bottom lip with my tongue. Evan growls deep in his throat and pulls me so I’m lying on top of him. Reaching up, I run my fingers through his hair, grabbing a hold as he deepens the kiss.

  This kiss is different than any of the others we’ve shared over the past few weeks. This one holds more fire, more passion, as my tongue meets his stroke for stroke. Resting my legs on either side of his waist, I’m now straddling him. We both moan the minute our bodies connect. He’s hard and I’m soaked, nothing but his boxer briefs and my silk panties separating us.

  I rotate my hips against him just as there is a loud cry, which comes through the baby monitor. We both freeze, waiting to see what happens next. Seconds later, Lexi is screaming into the night. I rest my forehead against Evan’s, not ready to move.

  “She’s probably hungry. She’s slept for four hours straight,” he whispers.

  “I’ll get her. You get some rest,” I say, preparing to dismount him. I feel embarrassment wash over me.

  “Hey.” Evan once again slides his hand around the back of my neck and guides me closer to him. “Don’t second-guess this.”

  I nod, not able to find my voice, and he releases me. “I can get her,” he says, sitting up.

  “No, it’s fine. I’m rested. You get some sleep. I’ll take care of your girl.” I offer him a shy smile before racing out of the room to tend to a hungry Lexi.

  “Hey, sweet girl,” I coo to her. She’s still crying, but the sound softens a little at my voice. I remember how she responded to my singing to her earlier, so I begin to sing “Just a Kiss” by Lady Antebellum. It’s fitting and not only calms her, but me as well.

  It only takes a few seconds of me singing for her to quiet down. I continue to softly sing the lyrics that speak so much of what I’m feeling inside. Once her diaper is changed, I lift her from the changing table and her cries stop all together.

  “You’re so good with her,” Evan says from behind me.

  I take a deep breath before turning to face him. “So are you. You’re still nervous, but Miss Lexi is the first baby you’ve ever been around. I have years of babysitting under my belt.”

  “It’s more than that,” he says, handing me a bottle.

  I take it from him and settle into the rocking chair so I can feed her. I watch as her little eyes close and she starts to eat. “Maybe,” I say into the quiet room. “Aren’t you supposed to be sleeping?” I ask, never taking my eyes of Lexi.r />
  “I’m where I want to be,” he says as he takes a seat on the floor, resting his back against the wall. He’s still wearing nothing but his boxer briefs, his rock-hard body on display. The same rock-hard body I’d trailed my fingers over just minutes ago.

  I don’t argue with him. He should be getting some rest, that’s why I’m here, but after our little tryst in his bedroom, I wouldn’t be able to sleep either. Realizing its time to burp, I carefully pull the bottle from her mouth and lift her to my shoulder. She’s not impressed and starts to cry. I begin to sing “Just a Kiss” again, and as soon as I do, I realize my mistake. Evan’s hearing every word. Lexi instantly calms, so I continue to sing until she finally burps and I’m able to continue feeding her.

  Nothing like just throwing it out there.

  Evan and I are quiet as we both watch his precious little girl eat. She finishes quickly and her little body sighs with satisfaction this time when I remove the bottle from her mouth. Placing her on my shoulder, I rub her back. Evan stands and grabs the bottle from the table and disappears.

  After about five minutes of rubbing her back, she gives me what I’m waiting for. I settle her back in her bed and whisper, “Sweet dreams.” Evan is standing in the doorway, arms and legs crossed, shoulder leaning against the frame. His eyes capture mine as I move toward him. When I reach him, he stands to his full height and holds out his hand. I slip mine in his and allow him to lead me back to his room. A protest is on the tip of my tongue, because that’s what I think I should do, not what I want.

  He stops when we reach his bed, pulls back the covers, and looks at me. “McKinley.” My name falls from his lips, sounding like a plea. I know what he wants, and it scares me how much I want it too. I climb into bed and settle on the opposite side, the same side I slept on earlier. Evan climbs in behind me, pressing his front to my back, and pulls me into his arms.

  My body instantly relaxes into his hold.

  I don’t move or speak. I’m too busy memorizing what it feels like to be here with him, like this.

  Our breathing slows to a matched, even rhythm and, surprisingly, sleep starts to claim me. That is until I hear his whispered words, “It was more than just a kiss.”

  I want to ask him what he means. What was it to him? Why is he holding me? What are we doing? Instead, I lie there in his arms, his soft breaths against my neck, and drift off to dream of more than just a kiss.

  Chapter 27

  Evan

  She’s more than just a kiss. I want more than anything to tell her how my feelings for her have changed. Tell her how I think about her all the damn time and how, anytime something happens, she’s the first person I want to tell. I want to bare my soul to her, but I won’t. She needs more than what I can offer her. I’m a single dad who is barely hanging on. Without her, I fear I would fail at this daddy gig I have going on. I can’t risk us not working out and losing both of my best friends, just to feel what it’s like to be inside of her.

  I lie awake far longer than I should, enjoying the feel of her in my arms. I let my mind wander to what Aaron would think if he knew what I was doing right this minute. If he knew I was holding her tight in my arms. If he knew what I was thinking, I’m sure he would kick my ass. She’s his little sister and my other best friend, and…more. I want her to be a hell of a lot more.

  If only things were different.

  I place a kiss on her shoulder and allow sleep to claim me, enjoying this moment of falling asleep with her tucked close.

  If feels like only minutes pass, when I’m woken by the soft whimpers of my baby girl. Reluctantly, I release the hold I have on Kinley to reach over and turn off the monitor, making a mental note to turn it back on later. I don’t want it to wake her. Slowly, I climb out of bed and make my way toward Lexi. I stop when I reach the door and turn back to look at my bed. McKinley is so peaceful, so fucking beautiful it makes my chest ache, and she’s in my bed. I want to memorize this moment. I want to store it away for all the nights to come when she won’t be here. My feet move on their own accord and, before I know it, I’m standing beside the bed----her side of the bed. Only one night and I’m already giving her claim. With a feather-soft touch, I remove the hair from her eyes. This image of her in this moment will forever be one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen.

  A louder whimper from Lexi tells me she’s about to get serious with her cries. My baby girl is hungry. I give a mental fist bump that I can tell what kind of cry it is. She’s the only person who could pull me from the beautiful slumbering McKinley.

  By the time I reach her, Lexi is angry. As soon as I pick her up, she settles down. “Hey, baby girl. Daddy’s here,” I coo to her. It sounds foreign to me to refer to myself as daddy, but that’s who I am to her. She’s a part of me.

  After a quick diaper change, which I’m getting better at each time, we head downstairs to the kitchen. The process of making her bottle is…messy. I spill the powdered formula all over the counter. I’m still learning to do this with one hand. Miss Lexi is not impressed when I try to lay her down. McKinley makes it look so damn easy.

  I settle on the couch and my little piglet begins to eat her breakfast. “I didn’t hear her wake up,” Kinley’s sleepy voice greets me.

  Looking up, I see her standing at the bottom of the stairs. My rumpled t-shirt is now covered with one of my flannel shirts hanging past her knees. Her hair is in disarray and that smile---my smile---lights up her face. She’s every man’s wet dream and she was in my bed last night. More than anything, I wish I could keep her there.

  “Yeah, I turned off the monitor. I didn’t want to wake you.”

  “Evan,” she says, walking further into the room. “That’s why I stayed last night, so you could get some rest and try to get on a normal schedule. You’ve been burning the candle at both ends.”

  “I’m good,” I tell her. I’m fucking fantastic. I got only a couple of hours of sleep at best, but I feel like I slept for days. Having her here feels right. Although, I’m not sure she feels the same way, considering she’s acting as though last night never happened.

  It was more than just a kiss, damn it.

  “Hey, Lexi has her first doctor’s appointment today. I was hoping you might come with me. I’m still nervous about taking her out on my own,” I confess. Talk of the doctor’s appointment gets me out of my own head. She’s not mine. I can’t think like she could be or even will be.

  McKinley walks into the room and sits on the couch beside me. Reaching out, she offers her finger to Lexi, who grips it tight. “Sure,” she says softly.

  I relax with the knowledge she’s going to be there. I’m a grown-ass man and the thought of taking my daughter out alone terrifies me. I don’t have to say it out loud. Kinley gets it.

  “What time is her appointment?”

  “Ten.” I glance over my shoulder at the clock; it’s six now.

  “Are you hungry?” she asks, standing from the couch.

  “Uh, yeah, I guess.” I’m not sure why she’s asking. I watch as she leans over and kisses Lexi on the cheek then stands. “I’ll make us some breakfast.” I watch her walk away, her long tan legs wearing nothing but my shirt. Do you know how perverted it feels to have a raging hard-on when you’re trying to feed your newborn daughter? It’s damn uncomfortable.

  “That smells amazing,” I tell McKinley when I enter the kitchen. I take the bottle to the sink and rinse it out. “She fell right back to sleep.”

  “She’s such a good baby, Evan.”

  “She is. That little girl owns me.”

  Her lips turn up at the corners. “She’s not even a week old and has you wrapped around her little finger.”

  I don’t respond, because she’s right. My baby girl may terrify me, because I have no idea how to take care of her, but I love her with everything in me.

  “I can’t wait to see how you react when she starts to date.”

  “Fuck that! She’s not dating until she’s at least thirty.” />
  McKinley throws her head back and laughs, her long slender neck on display. I want nothing more than to press my lips there, right against her pulse, and taste her.

  And my hard-on makes another appearance. Just like that. All she has to do is laugh and I’m hard as steel.

  “Breakfast is ready,” she says as she carries two plates filled with bacon and eggs to the table.

  Like a magnet, I follow her and settle into the chair right beside her. I can’t have her, but I’m sure as hell going to take full advantage of being close to her when I can. I dig into my plate and we enjoy a quiet breakfast together. Kinley talks about her studio and informs me, between her and her mom, Lexi will be in good hands while I work. I feel a weight lifted from my shoulders. It’s a relief to know people I trust will be taking care of her during the day. Just one more reason why McKinley and I can’t happen.

  Chapter 28

  McKinley

  “Evan, go, we got this,” I tell him for the third time.

  “I know. It’s just the first time I’ve left her. I didn’t know it would be this hard,” he says, running his hands through his hair.

  “Oh, honey, it gets easier. Why don’t you plan on eating lunch here today? I’ll have it ready at noon. This way you get to see this little one and ease you into it,” Mom suggests.

  Evan seems to brighten a little at her suggestion. Bending down, he pushes the handle down on Lex’s car seat. I watch him as he releases the straps and removes her, just like an old pro. Two weeks and he has come such a long way. “Daddy loves you, sweet girl. You be good for Kinley and her momma. I’ll see you in a few hours.”

  “All right, Daddy, time to go,” I say, holding my arms out for Lexi. Evan kisses her forehead and places her in my arms.