You Matter

by Jazzy Mitchell

  “Hey.” She reaches out for one of her bags. “I can’t believe Ben wants to go skating in this.” She falls into step with Reggie. “I love you even more for walking through this crap to come over.”

  “Well, your promise to warm me up was quite the incentive.”

  Chrissy catches Reggie’s smile and nearly trips on a block of ice sticking out from a snow bank. Reggie’s hand shoots out to grasp her arm. “Thanks,” Chrissy mutters. Reggie nods while linking their arms together. Once they’re in the apartment, they shed their outerwear as Ben rises to give Reggie a hug.

  “Want some tea?” Chrissy asks after hanging up their coats.

  “I do.” Reggie’s throaty voice makes Chrissy pause for a moment, her hand holding a teabag while she glances over her shoulder. “Need any help?”

  Shaking her head, Chrissy finishes the tea and brings them to the table. She reaches out to entwine their fingers in a loose grasp, smiling when Reggie rubs her thumb over the top of her hand. It’s a familiar gesture, one which reminds her how much Reggie cares for her.

  Leaning forward, Chrissy cradles Reggie’s face in her hands and kisses her. “I love you.”

  Arms surround them, and Ben says in a high-pitched voice, “I love you, too.” They laugh, as Chrissy pokes him in the side and he pulls away. His phone pings, and his eyes flickers to the text that came in. “Gotta go.” He pulls on his coat while sliding into his boots. “Bye, Mom. Bye, Reggie.” He swoops in and delivers a kiss on both of their cheeks. “See you later.”

  “Be careful. Check in with me later.”

  “I will.” He’s like a hurricane, blowing out the door and leaving a vacuum of silence.

  Glancing over at Reggie, Chrissy grins. “Just you and me, baby. Your legs must be tired because you've been running through my mind all day.”

  “That’s weak.” Reggie pouts.

  “I bet if you were a spider, you’d be a mommy long legs.”

  Reggie shakes her head, tutting. “I sense a theme here.”

  Chrissy goes through her mental catalogue of horrible pick up lines. It’s a game they’ve played in the past, one she enjoys. “On a scale of one to America, how free are you tonight?” She earns a chuckle for that one. “I must be a snowflake, because I've fallen for you.”

  “Nice one.” Reggie kisses her.

  Chrissy tries another one. “Treat me like a pirate and give me that booty.” Reggie groans.

  “Oh, come on. At least I’m trying. But you know, this is so us. Me doing all the talking, and you just sitting there looking sexy.” Reggie’s guffaw validates Chrissy’s latest attempt, and Chrissy rises to clean up the kitchen. Reggie’s arms wrap around her from behind, pulling her into well-known curves.

  “I love you more than all the grains of sand found on all the beaches in the world. More than all the stars shining in the Milky Way. More than all the drops of water in all the oceans.” Reggie’s voice is tender, her hands holding Chrissy close as her lips brush against Chrissy’s ear. She tilts her head, glad when Reggie takes the invitation and slides her lips down the column of her neck. “And what’s astounding is how this love grows more and more each day.” She turns Chrissy in her arms, and their eyes connect.

  Her eyes are so dark and rich and earnest, it takes Chrissy’s breath away. To be that loved, it’s scary. Reggie makes her feel cherished and worthy. Makes her want to forget she was the one her parents threw out of their home, and the one Jeff broke up with when things became complicated. The one her friends forgot about as she struggled to provide for her son. And even though those events happened long ago, they molded her, influencing her sense of worth. Yet in Reggie’s eyes, she can believe she’s worth more.

  Reggie delivers a kiss, nibbling on Chrissy’s bottom lip until she whimpers. She guides Chrissy while peppering her with kisses, navigating them into her bedroom and on the bed.

  Chrissy’s stomach does a little flip as she watches Reggie remove her clothes. It’s sensual and enticing, and all she wants to do is touch every inch revealed. Something in her expression must give her thoughts away, since Reggie puts her hands on her hips and glares at her.

  “You are not to distract me. I have specific plans for you. Got it?”

  Chrissy swallows, imagining it to be the loudest sound ever, and nods. Reggie’s smirk is all the warning she gets before her hands are everywhere, removing Chrissy’s clothes, exploring collarbones and ribs and knees and ankles. Her body quivers, each touch burning a trail of fire. She feels as if she’s drowning in honey—thick and sweet—all part of a secret recipe Reggie’s intent on following. Reggie tastes her, stirring in love and passion and affection. She hums and growls while feasting on Chrissy from head to toe. It drives Chrissy insane. Her intensity demands Chrissy believe in her feelings, believe she is the center of Reggie’s world. It’s addictive.

  By the time they rest, both sated and exhausted, Chrissy wants nothing more than to lie in this bubble of love and never leave. “I love you so much,” she whispers while Reggie’s fingers combed through her hair.

  “You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I love you, too.” Reggie’s arms wrap around her, and in that moment she feels secure in a way she’s never experienced before.

  ***

  Entering the cafeteria, Chrissy’s eyes search for Cathy, David, and Reggie. She finds them and makes a beeline toward their table. Squeezing Reggie’s shoulder, Chrissy sat next to her. “Sorry I’m late.” She shoots a smile at everyone, glad to have a break.

  “Hawk working you too hard?” Reggie’s brows lower.

  “Oh, no. It’s not that. End of the month means more real estate transactions. I was trying to finish funding a file before I came. I only have two more this afternoon, and I’ll have help.”

  “End of the month is busier?” David asks, taking a bite of his sandwich.

  Feeling a plate being nudged into her arm, Chrissy notices the salad Reggie got her. “Thanks, Reggie.” She picks up a fork. “People prefer closing at the end of the month so they’re paying less interest on their loans, not to mention other expenses like taxes, impounds, stuff like that.” She takes a bite of the Caesar salad, moaning at how good it is. Looking up, she notices their amused glances. “What?”

  “I’ve never seen someone enjoy food as much as you do.” Cathy chuckles. “It’s cute.”

  “Well, if you ever want to try out a new recipe, I’m glad to be your taste-tester.” Chrissy smirks.

  “They were wondering whether we’re available for dinner tomorrow night.” Reggie grins.

  Chrissy glances at Reggie and tilts her head. Ben’s going to be at Leroy’s house, and they’d planned to spend the night together at Reggie’s. Dinner with their friends first will be fun.

  She nods. “Sounds fun. Have you already discussed where?”

  “I was thinking Top of the Hub for dinner and maybe the Oak Room for drinks afterward. A celebration of sorts,” David says.

  “We’re happy you’re both together, and we want to celebrate it with you.”

  “You’re together?” a male voice asks. Looking up, Chrissy sees her parents. It takes her a moment to recognize the man next to them, Jeff. She sits back, eyes widening. She had rebuffed their attempts to see her, but evidently they decided to take that decision away from her. Jeff has black hair and hazel eyes. He no longer wears bangs, and he’s let himself go over the years. He stands with his arms held out awkwardly, as if he wants to put his hands somewhere, like in his pockets. Instead, he crosses his arms and pops his chest out.

  “What are you doing here?” Chrissy’s heartbeat speeds up and her hands begin to tremble. She balls her fists and hides them under the table. A moment later Reggie takes one of her hands. When she glances over, Reggie nods.

  “We knew you’d keep delaying a meeting, so we decided to come here to see you. Security was happy to let us in when we identified ourselves as your parents,” her mother says. Her curly brunette hair is filled with gray,
brushing her collarbones with uneven, stringy strands. Her light brown eyes are focused on Chrissy, an air of disapproval making Chrissy cringe.

  “You’re talking to each other?”

  Although she directed the question to her mom, Jeff answers. “Since my dad’s funeral, we’ve kept in touch. Not you, though. You left the neighborhood and never looked back. Everyone’s talking about you now. They want to know about our son, and I have nothing to tell them. It’s embarrassing.”

  Rage rolls through her. “Embarrasses you? Are you for real?” She can see Cathy and David across from her, concerned looks on their faces. Reggie’s glowering at them. She squeezes Reggie’s hand while shooting a withering glare at Jeff. “Yes, we are together. And I don’t give a damn about how embarrassed you might feel for not knowing anything about my son. You gave up the right to know a God-damn thing when you signed away your rights. Now, please leave.”

  “Don’t be absurd,” Chrissy’s father answers. “This nonsense has gone on long enough. I told your mother we should have tracked you down years ago. Well, we made that mistake, but we’re here now, and we’re not leaving until we know when we’re going to see you again.” Chrissy’s father is a tall, broad man with sandy hair closely cropped over his ears and forearms the size of bowling pins. His blue eyes hold an impatience Chrissy well-remembers.

  “Tina,” her mother implores, hands held up in a placating gesture. “We just want to meet Ben. He’s our grandson. And we want to spend time with you both. Jeff wants to be the father he should have been. Is that so wrong?”

  Reggie clears her throat. “What’s wrong is your refusal to wait for Christina to be comfortable with discussing this. What’s wrong is how you’ve forced the issue in a public forum. What’s wrong is how you’re ganging up on her.” Reggie holds Chrissy’s hand in a tight grip, and it provides her with the strength she needs to get through this conversation.

  Chrissy’s mom glares at Reggie with disgust. “You don’t get to talk to us about her life. If it weren’t for the way you’ve twisted our daughter into thinking she harbors some type of deviant feelings for you, she wouldn’t have gotten hurt.”

  Chrissy jumps up and stands in front of the table. “No. You don’t get to talk to her that way. I love her. I’m with her. You know this. We discussed it.” She’s shaking, her anger palpable. How dare they come here against my wishes. Reggie’s hand on her lower back calms her.

  “It’s just a phase. Now that Jeff’s back in the picture, you three can be a true family. Ben deserves to have his father in his life. I don’t expect this to happen overnight, of course, but give your real family a chance.”

  With each word her mother utters, Chrissy feels sicker to her stomach. She shakes her head, not wanting to hear anymore. “That’s never going to happen. Even if we got to a place where I felt comfortable having Ben meet any of you,” she glares at Jeff, “we’re never getting back together.”

  “Come on, Tina,” Jeff whines.

  “Stop calling me Tina.” Chrissy’s mortified by this entire conversation, and she wants it to end. Tears burn her eyes. I was stupid to think they’d changed.

  Chrissy’s dad reaches out to grab her arm, and several things happen at once. She hears more than sees Reggie, David, and Cathy stand quickly enough that their chairs clatter against the linoleum floor, the racket making him pause. The room quiets, and as she looks around, several colleagues move to stand in front of her. Security arrives and orders her parents and Jeff to leave.

  Seeing Reggie’s concerned brown eyes, Chrissy lets out a sob. “I’m so sorry, Reggie. Please don’t leave me.” She shakes her head. This is her worst nightmare come true. Her family has decided there’s something wrong with her, rejecting her true feelings. What if Reggie believes them? Even after all these months of Reggie telling her how wonderful she is, Chrissy allows her insecurities to get the better of her. She’s once again that lost, lonely, seventeen-year-old pregnant girl.

  Another voice overrides her panicked thoughts, a stronger one. No. I’m different now. I’m a grown woman with a son, friends, and someone who makes my heart sing. I’m worthy of their love, and if my parents can’t see that, they don’t deserve to be a part of my life.

  Murmurs of conversation begin to sprout up, and Chrissy lets out a shaky breath, feeling woozy. She raises a hand to her head and lowers herself into a chair. When she looks up, she realizes Eileen and several other employees who sought her out to thank her when she first began working for Hawk surround her. They all sport troubled expressions, and she tries to smile.

  “Thank you for your help. I’m sorry for interrupting your lunches.”

  “Don’t worry about it,” Eileen says. “You had our back. We have yours.” Chrissy notes several people nodding, and her smile becomes more genuine. Eileen rubs Chrissy’s shoulder. “Are you okay?”

  “Yeah. Thank you. All of you.” She looks around at the small group. Several of them nod, while others offer words of comfort. They wander off, and Chrissy takes a few deep breathes.

  “Are you really okay?” David asks while righting their chairs, her three companions watching her. She nods.

  “Yeah. That was horrible. Turns out my mom hasn’t changed at all. I had no idea she was planning to get me and Jeff together, but it makes sense.” She drops her face in her hands and groans. Ben’s going to be disappointed. How can I trust them with my son?

  “Everything’s going to be all right. We have your back, too,” Cathy says, her voice light.

  “And what a lovely back it is,” Reggie murmurs in her ear. She’s kneeling next to Chrissy’s chair, a hand rubbing slow circles on her back. Chrissy lifts her head and smiles. “I love you, and I’m not going anywhere.” Reggie’s face is solemn, her voice steady, and Chrissy believes her. She takes another deep breath and straightens.

  “I know. I’m okay.” Seeing the time, she rises. “I have to get back to work. Sorry for the drama.” She looks at Cathy and David. “Tomorrow sounds great.” Reggie pulls her into a hug, and she burrows into Reggie’s body for a long moment before pulling away. “I’ll see you after work.”

  “Are you sure you’re okay?” Reggie asks.

  Chrissy wants to brush it off, but the truth is she’s shaken. “I think concentrating on work is the best thing for me right now. I can fall apart later.”

  “And I’ll be here to put you back together.”

  “I’m counting on it.” They share a smile, and Chrissy feels better already. I may have lost my parents, but I’ve gained so much more. With a wave, she walks away, knowing several people are watching her back. It’s a new feeling. A good one.

  Chapter Fifteen

  By the time they return from a night of indulging in fabulous food and decadent desserts, Chrissy’s feeling much better. She and Reggie talked the night before about what happened in the cafeteria and how her fears of Reggie leaving her were unfounded. Their relationship is strong, thanks to the pains they’ve taken to discuss everything. Waking up in Reggie’s arms this morning was a balm to her soul. Although they slept at Chrissy’s house the night before, tonight they’re staying at Reggie’s.

  “How about some wine?” Reggie removes her high heels after hanging up her coat. She wears a flattering black A-line dress which falls gracefully to below her knees. Black lace covers her arms, and she suspects Reggie’s wearing matching lingerie.

  “Sounds perfect.”

  They’ve fallen into a rhythm when together. At Reggie’s home, they tend to relax in the den, sinking into the leather sofa and cuddling while talking. She follows Reggie up the stairs and veers off to the bedroom to deposit her overnight bag. Reggie keeps urging her to leave some clothes. Chrissy’s been afraid to do it, afraid she’ll jinx what they have, but the way Reggie shows her love every single day urges Chrissy to believe it’s okay to trust her.

  They snuggle on the sofa while sipping wine, treasuring the quiet moments. Chrissy’s mind wanders to the events of the last week. She imagi
nes if she were dealing with her parents and Jeff a year ago, she may have reacted differently. She would have done whatever they asked, eager to have them back in her life. She would have ignored her growing feelings for Reggie, missing the opportunity to build a future with an incredible woman. She would have allowed herself to be brainwashed, believing it was best for Ben. Reggie’s love has helped me become a stronger person. Another reason to be thankful that Reggie’s in her life.

  “How do you feel about taking a bath with me?” Reggie asks.

  “That sounds incredible.”

  They enter the master bathroom, and Reggie sets about preparing the bath, using her favorite bathing oils. Soon the air fills with the mingled scents of orange, sandalwood, pine, rose, and lemon. Chrissy removes Reggie’s dress, lips moving over her smooth shoulders and down her spine once the material is removed. Her bra and panties are, as Chrissy suspected, black lace and silk, and she admires the contrast between the dark color and Reggie’s olive skin. She runs her hands around Reggie’s waist before sliding them up her back and stalling at the bra clasp. She removes Reggie’s bra and watches as she steps out of her panties to stand in front of Chrissy, her natural femininity on display.

  “Like something you see?” Reggie smirks, twirling some of her brunette locks around her finger.

  “You take my breath away.” Chrissy can smell Reggie’s arousal, and her mouth waters.

  “Your turn, Ms Kramer.” Reggie’s eyes shine like diamonds.

  Chrissy shivers as she feels Reggie’s fingers against her skin, slipping under her shirt and pushing it over her head. She unzips Chrissy’s slacks and slips her hands down the back of them to cup her ass before pushing both pants and panties down her legs. Reggie’s fingers make little circles at the base of her spine before moving in front of her and removing Chrissy’s bra. She steps out of her slacks and stands before Reggie. She reminds herself not to hide from Reggie’s ravenous stare, knowing she’s loved and desired and wanted.