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Matchpoint

Page 7

by Gus Ralthocco


  Caio pointed to his backpack under the shelf. “I bought some caramels. There might be some left in there.”

  “Good, good.” Diego left the movie loading as he jumped over the bed to get to Caio’s stuff.

  He opened Caio’s backpack and easily found a few caramel cubes wrapped in plastic under Caio’s competition kit. He had to ignore the scent of cologne that wafted from the bag, mixed in with sweat from the dirty clothes they carried around.

  Diego shook his head as he closed Caio’s pack. He went to his side of the room to get the chocolates from his own backpack, which were also under all the stuff he carried around, but he wasn’t as meticulous in his organization. Diego rummaged through the bag and saw the wrappers. But as soon as he pulled them up from the bottom, a strip of condoms also came out, falling to the floor.

  “Oops,” Diego said to himself.

  Caio laughed. “Someone came well prepared, it seems,” he commented.

  Diego felt his cheeks getting hot, and he shook his head.

  “I wasn’t really expecting anything….” he started but then paused. It wasn’t like he had to explain himself, and there were condoms in bowls in the lobby and in the hallways.

  The air was awkward for a minute, until Diego put the condoms back inside, returned to the bed, and offered one of the chocolate bars to Caio. He pushed the nightstand between the beds, so they both could watch from his laptop, and then positioned himself against the headboard with his pillow.

  “Can I press play?” he asked.

  “Yeah, we’re good to go.”

  As the adventure started to unfold on screen, Diego saw how fast Caio got caught up in the movie, even though he already watched it a bunch of times. Diego wondered if Caio thought of him any differently because of the condoms, but that was ludicrous. Diego didn’t tell Caio about all the guys he went out with, but he never made a secret of that part of his life either. Caio was the one who seemed to keep everything to himself, but if his revelations the other day were anything to go by, he was coming out of his shell.

  Diego liked the idea of knowing more about Caio, especially if it could bring them closer together.

  ON Friday their game was in the morning. Their roommates had a game in the morning too, before Diego and Caio, so they had to share some tense moments in the living area before the other team left. Diego breathed a sigh of relief when they were alone in the apartment. They had breakfast in the dining hall, did a load of laundry, packed their stuff for the match, and left for the arena while it was still early.

  A couple of hours later, when they got to the arena to warm up, they could already hear the crowd cheering their roommates’ game. There were a few screens backstage, and Diego wanted to sneak a look at the scoreboard, just to know how Adônis and Elton were faring, but since Caio was focused on their preparation, Diego didn’t want to seem distracted.

  By the time they waited on the sidelines to be called into the main sand, Diego saw Elton coming out of the arena fuming, and a couple of minutes later, Adônis walked out, most likely having talked to the press.

  The way they acted around one another didn’t seem to bode good for the result of their game, but Diego had to put his satisfaction aside so he could concentrate on what was important.

  It was the end of the first round of the competition, the group phase. The four teams in each group played against each other for points, and the two best qualified teams from each group, plus the best third-places, would advance to the round of sixteen, when the path to the final was decided by winning match after match.

  For Diego and Caio, the current game would just decide if they qualified first or second in their group, since they had already won two matches. But it wasn’t going to be an easy game. As soon as they stepped into the court, the Mexican team was ready to take them on.

  De la Rosa and José Maria started the first set with the same strategy they used in the past—attacking Diego. But it was just as ineffective, although Diego and Caio didn’t have it easy.

  A few mistakes here and there docked points from them, but they played well. They found their rhythm, even if it was a tense hour on the court. The weight of the competition seemed to be building, but there was such a rush of energy directed at them every time they stepped on the sand that it was hard not to feel it.

  When they managed to get that last ball to fall to the ground and the referee signaled the end of the game, Diego and Caio captured the win. Right on cue, the fans in the stands cheered loudly.

  “We trained a lot to get here,” said Caio as they stopped by the mixed zone at the end of the match. Diego could see how his breathing was uneven, but he still managed to give his answers. “It’s something we’re used to, even though each Olympics is different.”

  “And what about you, Diego?” asked the reporter as he turned the microphone to him.

  “It feels great.” He stretched his lips into a satisfied smile. “It’s awesome when the ball just goes where you want it to go. Now that the qualifying round is over, we have to show what we’re made of in order to reach the final. The competition is only going to get harder from here on out.”

  The reporter nodded, and then someone else came up with the next question.

  “We saw Elton and Adônis playing a difficult game before you guys came in, and even though they lost, they still managed to advance onto the next round. According to the seeding, you two might meet for a game at the semifinal stage.”

  Caio seemed to take in that information for a moment.

  “It’s our job to do the best we can to reach the final, but it’s impossible to know if we’re going to go against each other at some point. Still, our team is thankful for the support of everybody, and we hope to see our country cheering for all the Brazilian teams.”

  Caio added a wave to the camera and then put a hand on Diego’s back to urge him to walk away. It was just enough to make the hairs on Diego’s arms rise all at once before Caio removed the hand as they walked on.

  It was an obvious evasion tactic to avoid more questions about their roommates.

  “I’m surprised you didn’t engage with De la Rosa this time,” commented Caio when they reached the innards of the arena. “Last time you made the game a lot messier with… whatever you were doing.” Caio put some emphasis on that word.

  Diego laughed awkwardly as he pulled out his pass to show to security.

  “I was thinking to myself if we should play a more conservative game this time. There’s a lot more people watching us.” Diego thought about the fans in the #pato hashtag and what they were going to say if they found the tape of that other game with the Mexicans. Maybe they’d get even better screencaps.

  They made it through the gates, and right away Diego caught someone staring at him from a few yards off. Elton turned away, but Diego could see him and Adônis talking to the president of the Federation, which meant they might have watched Caio and Diego’s game.

  “Come here, boys.” The prez motioned with a hand for them to join the group before Diego managed to think of an escape.

  They complied reluctantly. All four of them seemed uncomfortable when Diego and Caio joined the group.

  The prez had a cold, sweaty handshake that made Diego shiver. He always wanted to stay a few feet away from him, but he couldn’t very well ignore the prez, so Diego gingerly offered his hand in greeting and tried to control his instinct to retch.

  It didn’t help that the prez had the worst case of bad breath.

  “I wanted to get all of you here to congratulate you on reaching the elimination round. We need to see both teams playing their best,” the prez demanded, and all the men nodded in unison. “I’ve been talking to the other presidents, and they’ve mentioned how strong our teams are, even though we had readjustments during this Olympic cycle,” he said by way of dismissing the split between Caio and Adônis.

  “Now, Adônis and Elton, you two may go and rest. I just have a few words left to say to the other team.�
� The prez waved the other two away, and Elton was quick to nod his head, turn around, and almost run away.

  Adônis, on the other hand, directed at look at Caio, and there was something in his eyes that seemed to hide more secrets.

  “See you later.” Adônis waved at them and gave a nod to the president before he walked away.

  They waited for as much privacy as they could get in the main plaza, and Diego felt unease spreading inside his chest. It wasn’t every day that the prez talked to them.

  The man just stared at them for a moment and then his words were low but harsh from the start. “I just want to say that, after everything that happened, the only thing I want from you two is that you respect the better team in our country. And you are not that team, no matter what the international rankings say. If I have my way, I won’t allow the two of you to reach the final or even win a medal if Adônis and Elton don’t get there too. They’re the team that I have worked to put there, and if the two of you get onto the podium instead, I’m ending both of your careers.” His eyes were crazed as he leaned in closer and closer. But then he breathed in and stepped back. “Caio knows more than anyone how hard it is to be respected in our midst. It would be a pity to taint Diego’s name in the same way.”

  Diego wasn’t sure if he was supposed to say anything.

  “Take care,” the prez said, and he bowed as he stepped back.

  Chapter Eight

  “ARE you guys okay?” Marina swooped in as soon as the prez left them alone. Caio wanted to apologize to Diego and then explain that this was his fault, that he shouldn’t even be playing anymore and that he never intended for Diego to get involved, but he couldn’t do any of that when his words didn’t come out.

  And Caio hated when that happened, even if it lasted mere seconds.

  “Yeah,” Diego said and pasted on a smile far removed from what he really felt. Marina paused for a moment and looked at Caio with an inquiring gaze, but she said nothing. “We’re just ready to go home and rest.”

  “Is that it?” she asked. Caio tried to follow Diego’s lead and nodded. He found his words a moment later.

  “Yeah. Aren’t you guys going out again today?” He motioned with his chin to Alice, who was with Diego’s parents a few steps away.

  With the added pressure of what had just happened, Caio couldn’t help the guilt that slammed over him. He wasn’t doing enough for his kid or his partner. But Júlio and Roberta could take care of Alice, and only Caio could take care of his partnership.

  He and Diego needed to talk.

  “Yeah,” Marina answered. “I was really coming here to see if you didn’t want to go out with us, but it seems like you don’t.” She treaded carefully, and when a different answer wasn’t forthcoming, she took her cue to let it go.

  Caio still went to give his daughter a hug and stay with her for a while before they went back to the village, but he felt the need to make things right, to make his partner understand that he shouldn’t worry about what had just happened. He wanted to say that they would be okay, but he didn’t want to drag any of the others into it.

  When they left the arena, Caio realized how distant Diego seemed to be from him, but they couldn’t talk on the bus. He didn’t want to let a private conversation become public, and Diego was on his phone. If he wanted to ignore Caio for a while, perhaps that was what Caio deserved.

  As they arrived at the village, dark clouds were starting to take over the city. It seemed like an omen and not a good one.

  The first crack of thunder sounded as they got into their apartment. Their roommates were out.

  A gust of wind rattled the blinds as Caio closed the door behind him. Through the window, they could see the rain starting to pelt the side of the building.

  “Do you have any idea what that was?” Diego asked, his voice loud even over the sound of the storm. He seemed unsure of his own words right then.

  “I’m sorry—” Caio started, but Diego interrupted him.

  “Why are you sorry?”

  “Because this is my fault,” Caio answered. He was still at the door, a hostage of his own fear. Diego turned around and threw his backpack on the floor, but he didn’t sit, didn’t move beyond that.

  “How is this your fault?”

  “Because I’m the one in the middle of all of this, not you.” And even though Caio was giving him answers, he knew they just weren’t enough. He was circling around and not saying anything of substance, but it was just hard to open up about something that had hurt him so much.

  Caio sighed and looked away from Diego. He moved toward the window and left his backpack on the floor, under his shelf. He was tired, and they were dirty from the sand, though it seemed like their game had been long ago. Any good feelings about their victory had dimmed to nothing.

  He sat down under the window and patted the floor beside him for Diego.

  Diego looked unsure for a moment, but then he acquiesced, came with unsure steps toward him, and sat down close to Caio.

  Diego sighed. “Now you tell me what you mean.”

  Caio sat in silence and listened to the rain. He nodded.

  “When my partnership ended with Adônis, it ended badly. It wasn’t just because he cheated on me. He was afraid of coming out because we’ve known of stories from other athletes about losing their support network when they told the truth. We didn’t get to discuss a split, because—” Caio paused to gauge what was behind Diego’s eyes, but they weren’t easy to read.

  “Adônis decided to go to the prez with ‘evidence’ that I was harassing him, that I was gay and trying to take advantage of him, even after he cheated on me. I was so out of it that I played my worst game in the final at my last Olympics. He put the blame on me… and he wasn’t wrong in doing that.”

  “But all these things you’re telling me, they don’t seem like the man I know,” Diego told him, and his words carried an honesty that took Caio off guard. He didn’t know what to say, but he kept talking.

  “The prez badmouthed me to the sponsors, but they never really had anything on me, just enough to pull the money that was coming my way. In a short time, the prez had a partner lined up for Adônis and new sponsorship contracts, while I was left alone.”

  Caio shook his head. They wanted him to be forgotten, and the prez worked on that behind the scenes.

  “That’s why things are different for us? Why we train alone? Why the officials and other teams are wary of us? It’s all because of that?” Diego asked, and Caio confirmed with a nod. “I knew there was something more, but I never… never thought it’d be like this. How can they get away with it? And… does the prez know Adônis is gay too?”

  Caio could only lift his shoulders. “I don’t know if it makes a difference. The prez was mad with the game we played, me particularly. When Adônis came forward with his version of the events, I became the scapegoat.” All the memories from that time came rushing back. It still hurt him, and Caio looked away because he didn’t want Diego to see him vulnerable.

  Diego put a hand on his leg, and the touch seemed electric. Caio slowly came back to himself. He could see understanding, and he knew it wasn’t for nothing that they had become partners in the sand.

  “I’m sorry about what happened to you. But this isn’t right, you know?” There was a fire under Diego’s words, and he squeezed Caio’s knee.

  “I know it’s not. But you know I didn’t come this far to give up.”

  “Of course. And what are we going to do, then?” Diego asked. “We can’t let them win. We won’t let them win.”

  Their gazes met in the middle like they always did, with the rush of confidence and trust that was never misplaced when it came to the two of them. They had come together two years earlier, and now it was impossible to imagine life taking a different route. They were partners and friends, and their families were close. Their lives were crisscrossed in a messy pattern, perhaps more than they even realized, but the result was still beautiful.

&
nbsp; “I want that too, but….” Caio shook his head. “You know what he said.”

  “Well, I don’t care about what anyone else says. We fought too hard to get here. We deserve better than this. You deserve better than this,” Diego added, scanning Caio’s face. “You deserve better, Caio.”

  Caio could see that Diego was making a decision. Diego slowly moved toward him. It was almost impossible to detect it at first, but then Diego got to his knees on the floor, rose above Caio, and got close to his face. Caio could do nothing but look at him as his heart sped up.

  He was taken back to a few days before, to the night of the Opening Ceremony. He remembered those lips almost touching his and the smile that bloomed in his chest. Now he had a moment of indecision—the urge to move away and say no, the fear of repeating the past and hurting himself and someone else.

  But this was not the past, and Diego was not Adônis. Maybe not even Caio was the same.

  Instead of running away, he closed his eyes, and then he felt Diego’s breath hit his face. Diego pressed his hand against his shoulder, and lips touched Caio’s. Their mouths were warm and eager, but fear still gripped at Caio’s heart, even though a voice at the back of his mind told him to let go.

  Diego fell into him, and Caio supported his partner against his body, their chests meeting, their legs tumbling together, their hands looking for purchase. Something bigger clashed all around them, something impossible to explain. It muffled even the rain.

  He could taste Diego in his mouth, could taste the man he’d smelled a hundred times before, the man he’d touched a thousand times before. He could feel him in a way he’d never felt before, and that was exciting, exhilarating, but it was a free-fall Caio wasn’t sure he was strapped in for.

  Diego pushed away from him, but just a couple of inches, enough so their mouths could part and their eyes find each other again.

  Another clap of thunder echoed far away, but inside the room, everything was too quiet.

 

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