#MNGirl (Midwest Boys Series Book 1)

by A. M. Brooks

  Ciaran’s eyes soften again and the tension leaves his shoulders. “I’ve never forgotten before.”

  “Me either,” I reassure him, while dragging my nails down his back. He groans before falling back to me. I don’t know how long we stay locked together, and I don’t care. I tuck my face into his neck and breathe him in. He smells like sweat, mint and his body wash. He also smells faintly like my body wash. Like mine. He’s mine…for now.

  Ciaran

  I’ve always wondered what one of those alarms would sound like when it goes off on that board in the basement. In the last five years I’ve lived with Matt, I’ve never experienced it. In my eighteen years, it’s not been mentioned more than a handful of times that the alarm went off. I figure it out around four in the morning on a Tuesday in March. My heart jumps in my throat. Matt flies into the house, slamming doors. I jump out of bed and almost collide with Saylor in the hallway. Her eyes are big and anxious. I slam my hoodie over my head and take her hand, leading her to the basement. Matt is pulling out maps and has a cell phone to his ear, before setting it down and putting it on speaker. I grab the radio off the shelf and skip over dials.

  “Channel 12,” Matt instructs, pulling up his monitors. I flip to the one he wants right when Kai, Silas and Jason get into the room. Jason’s eyes flick to Saylor. I grip her arm and pull her behind me, away from all of their eyes.

  “Where are you now, Andy?” Matt asks.

  Saylor’s head snaps up, her eyes rimming red, she frantically looks to the board. Sure enough, the button on her mom and sister is blinking.

  “We’re just shy of the Missouri border. I couldn’t stop any sooner at one of the other safe houses. I’m not sure if they’re following or not. I didn’t want to chance it,” Andy’s voice floats in the air.

  “What the hell happened?” Jason demands, arms crossed, glaring at the phone.

  “I have no idea,” Andy answers. “I came home, and the place was trashed. I got out, picked up Kell from the flower shop, and we hightailed it to the school to get Mila. A dark van pulled away from the curb when they saw me. I started driving right away.”

  “Have you changed vehicles?” Matt asks, looking at his map and circling locations.

  “This is the first time,” Andy replies.

  “How long can you drive this one for?” he asks.

  “Until empty and it’s a full tank…probably to the border, but it could be shy of that.”

  “Just drive as far as you can.” Matt looks at his watch. “I’ll meet you there to extract you. Don’t stop for anything else if you don’t have to.”

  “Is my mom okay?” Saylor asks, unable to hold back.

  There’s a slight pause before Andy answers. “They’re okay, a little shaken, but okay.”

  Saylor’s body sinks into mine. My arm wraps around her head, pulling her closer and shielding her from prying eyes. I don’t miss the way Matt’s gaze flicks over us or the disapproving look on his face. I keep my features straight and deadly.

  Andy disconnects from the phone after giving us an ETA. Matt radios into the shop to get a rig put together with extra storage. He’s bringing guns, which means he thinks things are more serious than Andy has let on.

  “I’m coming with you,” Jason speaks up. Silas glares at the ground, his shoulders tensing.

  Matt nods, his eyes flickering over Silas, before coming back to me. “Kai, I need you on the monitors. I need open lights from Missouri to the border. I need eyes on that highway. Any car that passes the same three lights as Andy, you call it in.”

  “On it,” Kai answers.

  “Si, Ci and Saylor, I want you to get your asses to the garage. Set the house into lockdown until I get back.” Matt continues rattling off instructions.

  “Okay,” Si and I answer at the same time. Matt and Jason race up the stairs.

  “Let’s leave in ten,” I tell them, before ushering Saylor back upstairs. I pull her into my room.

  “What’s happening, Ci?’ Her voice sounds small and vulnerable. She’s hurting and confused. The calm before the storm.

  “Matt wants us to take refuge at the garage. There’s a chance the house isn’t safe right now, and we need to move you,” I explain to her. “Matt and Jason are going to meet Andy and your mom and Mila.”

  I pull one of my sweatshirts out of the closet and slip it over her head. The end hits her mid-thigh. I pull out a pair of my joggers and help her dress. She cinches the ties tightly around her waist to the point they start to look bulky. The sight makes me grin, while also squeezing my gut painfully. I like seeing my clothes on her. I like when she needs me.

  “Let’s go.” I grab her hand and lead her out of my room and down the stairs. Kai and Silas are waiting by the door. Kai’s backpack, with the necessary files, hangs off his shoulder. Silas pulls a 9mm from inside a holster that’s covered by his jacket, checks the chamber before slamming it in, and flipping the safety before handing it to me. He takes another gun from the other side, goes through the same process and hands it to Kai, before pulling his own weapon out from his back waistband.

  “Ready?” He cocks his eyebrow at us, his tone low. Kai and I nod. He opens the door, breaking left, while Kai goes right. They circle the perimeter, before whistling the all clear.

  “Hold onto my shirt and keep your head down,” I tell Saylor. Kai whips my truck into the driveway, and Silas opens the door. With one arm around her, my other still holding my gun, I half run and half drag Saylor out of the house and into my truck. The minute the door slams, we take off toward the garage.

  We arrive right as Matt and Jason are leaving. Saylor notices the bulletproof vests, and her eyes widen again. “It’s going to be okay,” I tell her, bringing her forehead to my lips. We quickly get inside and make it to the office. Kai locks everything down and flips on the perimeter cameras around here and the house.

  “Go lay down.” I nod toward the couch in the office and hand her my jacket. She takes it and walks over. She sits and curls her legs up, hugging them to her.

  “Well, this is fucked up,” Kai announces, while setting up his monitors how Matt wanted. Silas grabs the radio and switches to twelve. He sits in a chair, not saying anything. I know having Kelly come here is going to really fuck with his head. Having his dad going after her probably didn’t help. Old wounds are re-opening all-around me. My gaze swings between my friend and the girl who holds my heart with a vice grip in her hand. This is fucked up.

  “What do you need me to do?” I ask Kai, but he shakes his head.

  “Let a man work, Ci,” he admonishes and goes back to clicking his keyboard. I walk over to the couch and pull Saylor onto my lap. She comes willingly and wraps her arms around my chest, burying her tear stained face in my neck. The wetness tickles and creates shivers over my skin. I continue holding her, though. She can soak my whole shirt for all I care.

  Saylor sleeps, off and on, over the next twelve hours. Kai reports no incidents to Matt and Jason. Andy makes it to the border and all three of them are picked up. Across the room, Silas tenses. We’ve been monitoring the outside feed here and at the house. Any cars that drive by we’ve run through our system and each one has checked out.

  “Do you think this was an inside leak?” He finally voices the worst thing imaginable. It’s also the only thing that makes sense.

  “I hope not,” I answer, even though we both know that it was. There is no way anyone should have found them unless the information was given freely.

  “They could come here next,” he voices my fears again. My eyes swing to his.

  “I know,” I tell him, my arm instinctively pulling Saylor closer to me. I won’t lose her.

  “We’re ten minutes out,” Matt’s voice breaks over the radio in Silas’ hand.

  “Code-four,” he answers, standing up and flipping the switch for the automatic doors.

  Saylor is alerted by the commotion and gets to her feet. She paces by the door. Her anxiety is written all over her face.
Ten minutes later, the door opens, and the rig pulls in. Silas closes it behind them. Kai comes out, looking exhausted, his hair sticking up in all different directions from his hand running through it.

  The door to the office unlocks, and we head down the stairs.

  “Mom!” Saylor runs to her mom and sister, both of whom are running toward her. They meet in the middle, hugging, crying, and laughing. Silas comes to a halt next to me, his gaze intense on Jason who watches the huddle of women with a smile on his face. It’s the happiest I’ve ever seen Jason, and I can only imagine what that does to Silas. He storms out of the garage, Kai on his heels. I’m conflicted for the first time. My first instinct is to follow Silas and Kai, like I always do. But my heart deflates thinking of leaving Saylor right now. My eyes roam over her, taking in everything that’s happening. She’s crying happy tears and surrounded by her family. My gaze drops to the ground, guilt eating my insides. I’m Silas’ family. When Jason gave up, Kai and I stepped up to the plate. I follow after my friends, my brothers, and leave the girl who holds my heart.

  Saylor

  We didn’t leave the house over the next few days. There was constant chatter between all the safe homes and families. Everyone is taking extra precautions and reporting in. Someone is always around, checking the perimeter, watching monitors or scouring the news feed. We are constantly monitored. I almost feel like I have to ask to be excused to go to the bathroom.

  I want things to go back to normal. I’m ready for this quarantine phase to be over with. Matt wants to keep my mom and Mila here for at least another week or more, until they have definitive answers. I want them to stay here permanently. Mila fills me in on her life in Arizona. She was going to school and planned to play softball this spring. She made friends and was feeling normal again. After the incident in New York, she and mom were seeing a therapist to talk through the trauma. She tells me mom was working at a flower shop and even started making friends with the booster club parents. I’m happy for them, even while being sad that they were doing okay without me.

  Mila is sleeping with me, which ends any chance of seeing Ciaran alone. He distanced himself the minute my mom and sister arrived. I figure it has something to do with Silas, who constantly wears an angry scowl and is ready to pick a fight with his dad over every little thing. I want to yell at him to stop being so petty. Jason is not upset to have my family around. If anyone, he should be the one upset, since my family screwed him over. He acts professional, which is something the guys are clearly lacking. Even Kai has lost some of his friendliness. I chalk it up to everyone’s emotions running on high alert with the safe house being discovered. A small inkling in my mind, though, is whispering that there is something bigger going on, only my heart refuses to see it.

  “How are you holding up, Love?” My mom asks, curling up next to me on the couch. I shrug, and my gaze darts back to Ciaran involuntarily. Her eyes follow mine and a knowing smile pulls her lips apart. “He’s cute,” she whispers behind her hand and laughs.

  “Stop.” I laugh along with her, a blush painting my cheeks. “I think he’s mad about something,” I confide in her.

  Her forehead scrunches, and she frowns. “I think Ciaran has a big responsibility to fill, and he just has a lot on his plate right now. You don’t see it, but he’s stealing glances at you, just like you are of him.”

  “Really?” My head lifts and so does my smile. She nods and smiles.

  “Are you dating?” she asks, while rubbing my arm. I nod my head yes then no.

  “I’m not really sure,” I tell her, lifting my shoulder in a shrug. I tell her our story, and her eyes cloud over. A darkness I’ve never seen before from my mom shakes through her.

  “Silas is Jason’s son?” she asks. I nod my head yes.

  “Are you okay?” I ask, my hand slipping into hers.

  She grips me tightly. “I’m fine. Just surprised, I guess.”

  I nod, even though her statement doesn’t really make sense. We’re both lost in thought when Silas and Jason start yelling back and forth from the kitchen. My mom stands and walks over to them. I get up to follow her.

  “Ever since she came here, you want to be super dad. Fuck you, Jason. You’ve never done shit for me!” Silas’ face is red.

  “You have no idea what you’re talking about, Boy.” Jason shakes his head. He’s tense, his shoulders vibrating.

  “I know that when mom left, you didn’t bat an eye. You used a bottle to get over it. Now Kelly’s back in town, and you want to know what I want for dinner and if I finished my homework…fuck you,” Silas hisses, his voice falling into a growl.

  “Jason, you need to tell your son the truth.” My mom suddenly jumps into the conversation. All eyes swing to her. Silas lights up again with fury and hate.

  “Whatever you’ve told him, Jase, it’s messing with his head. You need to tell him everything.” Matt adds his opinion, and suddenly, everyone doesn’t know where to look anymore. I try to get Ciaran’s attention, but he purposefully keeps his eyes averted.

  Jason takes a deep breath in, his eyes watering when they land back on Silas. “I was in love with Kelly all through high school. Over spring break, our senior year, I got drunk at a party and cheated on her. I told her about it, and we were going to try and work through it, until your mom came to me saying she was pregnant. I wanted to still be part of your life and co-parent. Your mom gave me an ultimatum that if I didn’t marry her, she was going to get an abortion or put you up for adoption, without me knowing. So I married her.”

  Silas is shaking from head to toe, his hands clench and unclench. My eyes dart to Ciaran who’s watching his friend. Kai’s gaze swings back and forth between Jason and his friend, unsure who he’s supposed to feel more sorry for. Silas’ mom left and at the same time Jason was trying to protect Silas from being used as a pawn by his mom. It’s a messed up situation.

  “When your mom left, she was pregnant,” Jason keeps going. This time, Matt reaches out a hand and lays it on Jason’s shoulder. “I tried to get her to come back. I thought maybe this baby would bring us close again. She always held Kelly over my head, and I couldn’t make myself love her when she was so manipulative. I feared every day I was going to come home, and something would happen to you. She tried to run away with you once, faked that you were kidnapped. Matt and I spent four days looking for you, before she showed back up at home. I have no idea what happened to the baby she was carrying, Si. I feel guilty over it every day. I know I drink, and I know I used to yell at you. You just held her to such a high standard that I didn’t want to ruin that for you, but it also wasn’t fair to me.”

  Silas stomps out of the house, the front door flying against the wall. Ciaran and Kai start to go after him. “You two stay.” My mom glowers at them. I feel her maternal, mama bear about to kick in and heaven help us all. “Jason, you go after that boy. You made the choices you did and maybe your marriage wasn’t perfect, but you got one hell of a kid out of it. He needs you right now. Get going. Be his goddamn dad.” Jason flinches, but when he looks at my mom, the adoration he still has for her is clear as day on his face.

  “We need to talk later,” he says, holding her gaze hostage.

  “Fine.” She nods. “But first, go be a dad. Now I have to take my daughters upstairs and explain to them what you two knuckleheads have been keeping under wraps here.” Her gaze lands on Ciaran and Kai, the latter at least has the decency to look guilty.

  The whole time I’ve been here comes flying back to me in clips and pictures from my memory. The minute I arrived here, I was met with hostility. Silas, Ciaran, and Kai flat out said they didn’t want me here and that I basically deserved to die and not be saved by Matt because of what my family did. I was bullied, ignored, diminished and broken, little by little, ever since I got here.

  “You hated me because Silas thought my mom ruined his parents’ relationship?” My eyes focus only on Ciaran. He lifts his gaze to mine, and everything I see on his face only confirm
s the truth. He was making me pay for sins he and Silas thought my parents committed, almost twenty years ago. Before I was even born.

  I turn and flee up the stairs as fast as my legs will move. My cheeks sting and they’re flushed so red that I fear all the blood will rush to my head. I’m embarrassed, confused and heartbroken. I thought apologizing would help Silas get over his parents losing money because my father was a criminal. I had no idea he wanted my head because he blamed my mom for his parents’ marriage failing and his mom leaving him. Not once, in all the nights he spent with me, did Ciaran even attempt to tell me the truth. He never would have let go of that contempt for me, while still thinking my family was to blame for his friend’s pain. I can vividly remember Matt telling them over and over that they didn’t know what they were talking about. They never bothered to find out, though. The perfect Midwest Boys believed they were never wrong about anything, even without knowing all the facts.

  My bed dips, and Mila scoots next to me, resting her head against my shoulder. A few seconds later, my mom lays on my other side, running her fingers through my hair. “I met Jason when we had the same teacher in second grade. Matt was also in my class that year. The three of us instantly bonded. We were inseparable. They never treated me as less than equal, even if I was a girl. When we reached middle school, my feelings for Jason started to change. I noticed him more. My heart skipped faster when he was nearby. I was so scared of losing one of my best friends, I didn’t say anything. Our first day of freshman year in high school, this older boy came up to me and wanted my number. Jason told him to eat dirt and that I was his. He kissed me for the first time, and we were together after that.”

  “I thought Dad was your high school sweetheart?” I ask, feeling like my whole life has been a lie.

  “Your dad came to live with my family during my junior year of high school. We took him in for Rogue.” My mom’s voice trails off. Mila and I turn to look at her, confused.