Wandering Soul

by Steven Anderson

  I looked at Hannah sitting on Winona’s bed, talking quietly with her, gently wiping the blood from her face. “How can she…? How can she even function after that?”

  “This gift that we share, it’s pretty strong between you and me. With Hannah, after all this time, it’s almost like we’re one person when we want to be. Most of her was inside me while it was happening. I was holding her and we were comforting each other. It’ll still catch up with her though, sooner or later. She’s trying to push it off for now, until we’re all safe again. She’s an amazing woman. I had forgotten how strong she is when it’s needed.”

  He smiled at me, touching my hair.

  “In a few hours, or a day or two at most, she’ll shatter and I’ll need to help her put the pieces back together. She’s going to need all of our help then.”

  I didn’t realize I was crying until he reached up and touched my tears. “You need to push it off for now too. No tears yet. We’ll get through this together.”

  I couldn’t take my eyes off of her. I wanted to run to her and hold her. I wanted to try and make all the badness go away, to ease her anguish the same way she used to hold me and tell me how wonderful and special I was after one of the many bad days at school when everyone had been mocking ‘weird Mala Dusa’.

  I looked into my dad’s eyes and his emotions were closed to me. “What about you, Dad? Are you going to be OK?”

  “I’ll heal, and we will find a way back home.” He smiled at me again. “Although, Winona told me what you did this morning. Are you sure you’re not planning on staying, Saint Joan?”

  “Don’t call me that. That was the Tarakana in my head.”

  “Again?” He sounded worried. “They seem to like you a little too much.”

  I nodded and my display pad pinged.

  “Sam,” I whispered, trying to pull the pad from my pocket. I looked at the name on the screen. “It’s Captain Kelang.” I tried not to sound disappointed.

  “Is the connection secure?” Winn asked. Hannah had finished with her face and was starting on her neck.

  “Just standard.”

  “Be careful what you say, for a change.”

  I tapped the icon to answer him. “Captain Kelang.”

  He smiled. “I had hoped that the reports of your death were premature.”

  “Am I dead?”

  “It seemed a possibility. A message was sent to every media outlet on the planet from Ambassador Killian’s own account. It said that a militia ambush had hit your party in the Warrens, killing two members of the Guard that were providing escort. Interestingly, it also said that he was requesting permission for special Union transport to retrieve you from the church Mission where it was hoped that you were taking refuge. I’m working on fulfilling that request right now, if you still need retrieving.”

  Winn had her head tipped back, looking at the ceiling while Hannah finished with her. “Bold move, Samuel,” she said quietly. “The ambassador is going to be pissed when he finds out.”

  Hannah sat the bowl on Winona’s lap and moved over next to me. I gave her the pad.

  “Captain, thank you for your quick response. We really could use your help getting out of here.” She had just a trace of a smile on her lips and her tone of voice was a magical combination of gratitude and command.

  “Councillor Weldon, are you all right? Have you been injured?” I would swear that had the Captain been there in person, that he would have knelt or kissed her hand the way Cuza had. This man, who had only talked to her for a few seconds, had followed Hannah’s career for over a decade. Now he was ready to put his own career, and maybe his life, on the line for her. I glanced at Dad. He had an amused expression on his face, like he had seen her do this before and that he loved her for it. I needed to have her teach that trick to me.

  “We’re fine for now. How soon can you come for us?”

  “That’s what I’m working on. The local authorities have given me three answers in the last ten minutes. First they said you and your husband were still being held, then that you were all killed. Now they’re telling me that you left for Earth this afternoon on a ship that departed space dock forty-eight hours ago. I’ve tried to reach Ambassador Killian, but the comms at the embassy are completely down.” He smiled ruefully. “I’m about ready to have a shuttle drop right into the Warrens to pick you up.”

  Hannah’s eyes lost focus for a moment. “No, Captain, please don’t do that, not unless we have to.”

  “I will come for you today, Ms. Weldon, one way or another. We’ll get your family out of there.”

  Hannah smiled gently. “Thank you, Captain. I will never forget this.”

  Kelang disconnected and I put my arms around her. She rested her head on my shoulder for a moment, me holding her instead of the other way around.

  “Thanks, Mala Dusa. I’m going to need a lot of hugs for the next week or two.”

  “How did you do that?” I asked her. “With the Captain. He’d do anything you ask. What’s the trick?”

  “I should ask you the same thing about Sam. He’s taking an awful risk for you.”

  “Oh, that’s just Sam. He’s–”

  “He’s in love with her,” Winona interrupted, “because she’s a little bit crazy and extremely dangerous. I am starting to believe that some people find that combination irresistible.”

  Hannah closed her eyes, her head still resting on me. “That’s the trick, Dusa. When you find one like that, never, never let him go.”

  I looked at Winn and had a sudden need to be holding her too. I held out an arm and she joined us.

  I glanced at Dad and he shook his head. “Uh-uh. I’d hate to interrupt, and you know, ribs.” He tapped his side.

  “Coward,” I told him.

  “You bet. All three of you are extremely crazy and a little bit dangerous.”

  “Other way around,” I corrected him.

  “Don’t be so sure.”

  I held out my arms to him until he came close enough to hug.

  There was a sharp knock at the door and it immediately opened. Cuza was there, looking freshly showered. Father Ryczek was standing in front of him, profoundly unhappy.

  “Ms. Weldon, or should I call you by your Nome de guerre?”

  “As you wish.” I could feel her emotions snap shut.

  “Come to see how your experiment in creating a living paradise is working out?”

  “It was never meant to be a paradise, Father, just a place where people could live in dignity with hope for the future. I’m sorry if your Mission couldn’t handle the competition.”

  “God’s Mission, not mine. And it still provides the only true hope for the people here.”

  “And thanks to your friend, Boden, it’s likely to remain so.”

  “Not my friend! The Bodens are an abomination, and have been for generations.” He paused, looking at Dad and Winn and me. His expression softened. “You’re not staying to fight though, are you?”

  “I don’t know where to begin. We’ve been lied to and misled at every level.”

  Winona touched her shoulder. “I have a preliminary report almost ready for you. When you have time. We can fix this without bloodshed. Maybe.”

  In the back of my head the memory of the Tarakana was whispering, we can be in the capital in three weeks with only twenty thousand dead. God help me, but I wanted to do it. With Winona by my side, I knew that I could do it.

  “I’ll work with you,” Father Ryczek said. “No one knows the people of the Warrens the way I do. I love these people more than life itself. We share that much, you and I.”

  Hannah nodded, silent. I could feel a crack in her mind threatening to open and Dad in there trying to keep her together. She closed her eyes and her head tipped forward. I held her close to me.

  Ryczek glanced at my dad, I think
noticing for the first time his physical condition and Hannah’s. The corners of his mouth turned down. “So, that’s how it was?” he asked.

  “Yes,” Dad answered, “That’s how it was.”

  “Killing is a dreadful thing, but often understandable and sometimes necessary. Are they both dead?” he asked Cuza.

  Cuza’s eyes locked onto mine and he winked. “It’s been taken care of, Father.”

  Ryczek nodded, knowing he was being lied to, but trusting Cuza.

  “Where do we go from here?” Father Ryczek asked. “The media is reporting that Union transportation has been requested for you.”

  “We’ve talked to them. They’re having difficulty getting permission to come for us, and the government bureaucracy is going to get organized again if we don’t move quickly enough.”

  “I can get you to the terminal.”

  “We’d never make it past security if they’ve been told to watch for us.”

  “I can get you straight to the one of the landing pads.” He sighed. “You aren’t the first fugitives we’ve had to move off planet. Tell your Union friends to drop a shuttle onto pad twenty-two in one hour.”

  Father Ryczek did something next that I will always remember. He knelt down on the floor in front of Hannah and placed his hands on her cheeks.

  “Daughter, I walked in the Warrens this morning, and it is a better place than it was before you came. Not a paradise, but there’s hope. There are flowers piled high where your statue once stood. Let it be enough for now. Go home and rest. Heal. Come back to me again when you are ready to forgive and to talk. OK?”

  She nodded and whispered back to him “OK.”

  “Now get ready to travel. I’ve brought a bundle of clothes. They aren’t stylish, but something in there might fit you.”

  Hannah stood and helped him to his feet. It felt like the cracks were holding again for the moment, thanks to Dad. “Stylish or not, I am grateful for all you’ve done for us.”

  “And my contract?” I asked him.

  He chuckled. “Next summer I expect to see you back here or I’ll press charges. You still have Bodens Gate citizenship, as I recall.”

  “Yes, Father. I owe the Warrens a couple of months of service. And I owe you my life.”

  I sat next to Cuza while he drove. We passed the Gabriella, where I had briefly dreamed of having a secret dinner with Sam some night. It looked dirty and dangerous in the late afternoon sunlight. I sighed. It would have been so perfect. I was chewing on my lower lip, wondering when the next time Sam’s lips would be on mine, wondering what his reaction would be if I were to nibble gently on his lower lip.

  The truck hit a pothole, jarring me back to reality. I shouldn’t be thinking about Sam’s lips. I should be worrying about whether he was even still safe after what he’d done to save all of us. I should be praying for him. I leaned my head to the right onto Dad’s shoulder and closed my eyes.

  He took my hand. “It’s going to be OK, Dusa.”

  I squeezed his hand, but didn’t say anything. I was too busy praying.

  We reached a security gate on the lower level of the terminal. The bored guard glanced at us. “Mission business, Cuza?” he asked.

  Cuza passed him a thick envelope. “That’s right, Johan. I won’t be but a moment.”

  Johan pocketed the envelope and opened the gate for us.

  Sitting in church a few months before, I had watched a video of Father Ryczek detailing how our donations were being used. He had talked about clothes and food and teaching supplies. He hadn’t mentioned bribing guards to smuggle fugitives to safety.

  “I’m going to have to up my monthly donation, Cuza,” Dad commented.

  That’s Dad; still assuming that we were going to make it home and everything would be back to normal.

  The truck rounded a corner and climbed the access ramp up on to the landing pad. A beautiful little ship was there, looking clean and new compared to the scorched white of Wandering Star’s shuttles. The Union emblem on her side above the name Bahia Vista made me feel like Dad was right; we were almost home.

  I got out of the truck, my only possessions the clothes I was wearing, my display pad, and my Bourean cup. The lock of Winona’s hair was still tucked under my watch, and I never took off my watch.

  We all hugged Cuza before we boarded. He held Hannah a moment longer than the rest of us.

  “I was right about you, Cuza.” She told him. “You haven’t changed and you don’t disappoint.”

  “Don’t stay gone so long next time, and take good care of Little Soul. We need her back here.”

  We climbed aboard the shuttle, the landing ramp rumbled closed and we waited.

  “Star?” Dad asked.

  “Vista,” I whispered to him. He smiled at me from across the aisle, embarrassed.

  “Vista, why aren’t we moving?”

  “Traffic control has placed a seal on outbound movements. Duration is unknown. They have advised us to stand by.”

  A shiver passed through me and then the shaking started again deep inside.

  Winona nudged me. “Call Captain Kelang.”

  I nodded and started to unroll my display pad.

  “I can contact him for you, if you like,” Vista offered.

  “Yes, he needs to be aware of what’s happening.” A moment later I was looking at the Captain on the main display screen at the front of the cabin.

  “Good to see you’re all safely on board. We should have you underway in a few minutes. The Guard was demanding to inspect all outbound craft, so I told them that RuComm doesn’t recognize their authority and that my shuttle will be departing as soon as it’s ready. They’ve gone off to discuss it with their superiors, I believe.”

  There was a soft ping and a timer appeared at the bottom of the screen, counting down from sixty. “We will be departing in one minute. Please ensure that your restraints are tight and that all items are secure.”

  “Thank you so much, Captain. I’m looking forward to meeting you in person,” Hannah told him.

  That tone of voice again. I really needed to learn it.

  At eight seconds the timer stopped and Vista informed us, “There are personnel in close proximity to my hull. I will not be able to use my thrusters until they depart.”

  Captain Kelang frowned. “Sound the claxon for twenty seconds and launch anyway. My authority.”

  The claxon was loud enough that we could hear it inside the cabin. I had once been told that the claxon of a departing starship was loud enough to rupture eardrums at one hundred meters. Winona whispered to me. “This is how careers end.”

  I turned my head to look at her, whispering so Dad wouldn’t hear. “This is how wars start.” I could feel my excitement building. “The Central Government is going to blame ‘the Warrens’ for the deaths and injuries we just caused, including killing that creep Steiner. The Council of Clans will claim they know nothing about it, but they’ll be insulted by the accusation. Both will blame the Union, since the order to get us off planet came from the embassy. Sam has played his role perfectly.”

  “Duse…”

  “Now’s the time for the next push.”

  “Duse…”

  “You and I should go back as soon as we can, back to the market. I need to talk to the people there again. We can be in the capital–”

  “Duse!”

  “What? Don’t you feel it? We’ll never have an opportunity like this again in our lives.”

  “What are you feeling Mala Dusa?”

  The hum in my head was roaring. “It’s the right time, but I’m in the wrong place. I should be back there. Sam! We left Sam back there. His role isn’t finished. I need him. I really, really need him.” Winn’s eyes were huge looking back at me.

  “Mr. Holloman!” She reached across the aisle and grabbed Dad
’s shoulder. He had been leaning back with his eyes closed, holding hands with Mom.

  “What is it Winona?”

  She opened her mouth, closed it again, and then smiled at him. “Never mind. It can keep.”

  She turned back to me. “Tell me more.”

  CHAPTER 12

  SAM

  I unrolled my pad across our laps and began sketching. “Before the Confederation, there were thousands of clans and they overlapped everywhere. Now, thanks to Hannah, there are only fifteen and they have defined territories. Which ones are still loyal to the Articles of Confederation and which ones are corrupt?”

  Winn stared back at me. “All of them are corrupt. I think the Bovita will follow you because of who you are.” She glanced across the aisle. “We need your mom to join us on this. Our odds of success are much greater if she’s there, even if it’s just to initially provide you with legitimacy.”

  I looked at her sitting next to my dad and could feel the anguish in her, swelling and then subsiding as she tried to overcome it, then overwhelming her again. It scared me that my biggest concern right then was whether I could use her for what we were planning, wondering if she would hold up to the strain. They humiliated her, a voice was telling me. You need to be with her and hold her and tell her how much you love her.

  “Just one out of fifteen?” I asked.

  “Well, the Roho should fall in line if we eliminate their current leadership, and the same with the Feraru. With that core, we can pressure the rest to join or face rebellion within their own populations.”

  She was studying me. “When your mom united the clans and created the Confederation, she worked in the shadows. I was watching you in the market, Duse. There’s no one that looks like you, no one that sounds like you, and no one the people here will fall in love with like you. You need to be highly visible the whole time.”

  “It’s about the ideas, Winona, which is good because I know damn well that no one is attracted to me.”

  “No, it’s about convincing people that you can make the ideas real. In the Warrens, your appearance makes you rare and exotic; it won’t matter that you’re not pretty. And always remember that some people are attracted to you.”