Awaken (Awaken Series Book 1)

by Jaime Guerard

  “Oh,” was all Becka said.

  Collin finally looked up to me and gently grabbed my hand under the table. He squeezed it letting me know everything would be okay. I forced a tiny smile from my paralyzed lips.

  I knew what I had to do now. What’s done is done, I thought. I’d figure out how to make things right with Austin but for now I had to focus on Collin. I had to concentrate on keeping him safe, keeping him here with me. I hadn’t told him yet. I think I was trying to protect Austin, to shield him from unnecessary hurt and pain. Now that the truth was out, I had to change Collin’s foreseeable fate.

  “Beck, I need to talk to Collin. Would you mind checking on Austin, just to make sure he’s okay? We’ll be out in a minute.”

  “Sure, but you know what time it is, right?” She held her cell phone up showing me the time. I hadn’t been paying attention. “We only have a few more minutes before we need to get Collin to the airport.”

  I tossed my keys to her. “We’ll be right there.”

  “Bre, before you say anything,” Collin spoke, when Rebecca was gone, “I need to give you something right now while we’re alone.”

  Collin reached down and picked up the small bag from the gift shop. I waited impatiently, running through different scenarios of how to tell Collin what possibly could be in store for him if he left, but nothing sounded right. He opened the bag and took out a small, silver box with a white ribbon tied around it. Puzzled, I untied the ribbon and opened it. Centered perfectly inside the velvet lining was a platinum necklace with a beautifully etched design all the way around the circumference. I had never seen anything so intricate, so stunning before.

  “Collin, it’s beautiful,” I said somberly.

  A tiny smile lifted from his mouth. “I wanted to get you something before I left. The clerk told me that the person who designed the necklace wanted it to mean forever or eternity. She designed this to never have an ending. No matter how many times you draw your finger around it, it continues. And it’s one of a kind, there’s no other necklace like it.” He took a deep breath and reached over to brush the side of my face with the back of his hand. I wanted to tell him how the meaning was perfectly symbolic of my feelings, how I never wanted an ending with him, only an eternity. I looked up from the necklace and back at him as he continued, “This isn’t goodbye.”

  My heart skipped a beat, and I felt the flicker of heat starting it back up. My face flushed. He stood and took the necklace from the box, clasping it around my neck. Then he kneeled beside me, his aching eyes searching mine.

  I realized Austin was with him when he bought this. “What did you tell Austin?”

  “I told him it was for a girl back in San Francisco,” he admitted. “I’m so sorry to even ask this of you,” he took my hand in his, “but just until I can figure a way to tell my brother about all of this…could you be careful when wearing it around him?”

  “Of course I will,” I tucked the necklace immediately underneath my shirt.

  A horn billowed from the street and Collin’s shoulders dropped, knowing our time was up.

  “I guess we need to get going,” Collin sighed, tossing some money on the table and helping me up from my chair.

  Panic struck me, swinging me back on course. The necklace had distracted me for a few moments, making me forget about what I needed to do. “Collin, I need to talk to you.”

  “Tell me in the car. We have to go.” He grabbed my hand and pulled me to the door. We ran outside into the downpour and slid into the car. Austin was in the driver’s seat, and Becka sat next to him.

  “Austin, I can drive,” I said, but he didn’t respond. He pulled out and continued down I-5, heading for the airport. Rebecca glanced at me a couple of times, wondering what had happened, but I said nothing.

  At the airport, Collin waited in line to check his bags. Austin insisted on helping him, so I suggested that Becka and I sit and wait for them to be done.

  “I take it you didn’t tell him?” Becka asked under her breath.

  “Couldn’t,” I spoke quietly.

  “Why?” She said, a little too loud.

  “Shhhh…” I looked at the boys, but they didn’t hear her. “Because,” I whispered. “We didn’t have enough time.”

  Rebecca crinkled her eyebrows together. “But you were alone for a few minutes. What happened?”

  “I know, I know. ” I made sure the boys were looking the other way before I reached into my shirt and pulled out the necklace just enough for Rebecca to see it. “He gave me this.”

  “Oh-my-gosh!” she gasped quietly.

  I bit my lip. “But Austin thinks it’s for someone else so you can’t say anything.”

  “I won’t, I promise.” She crossed her heart.

  “I mean it, Beck. Not one word to anyone.” She had to take this seriously.

  “I promise,” she repeated. I eyed her.

  I tucked the necklace back in my shirt. “That’s why we didn’t have time. I’m gonna tell him the moment he comes over.”

  “You’d better do it soon, because he’s checking his bags right now. In fact, maybe you should go do it now before it’s too late to change his mind about getting on the plane.”

  “I can’t. Austin’s right there.”

  “What’s more important, Austin’s feelings or Collin’s life?” Her words were sharp. But she was right.

  This was the only time I had. I got up quickly and walked through the line, heart pounding, muscles constricting, and over-extending my breathing to its limits. Collin was the next in line.

  “You can’t leave!” I purposely didn’t look at Austin.

  Stunned by my boldness, Collin objected slowly, “Bre…I have to leave.”

  “No, you can’t. Something…”

  “Next.” The lady at the counter motioned him over.

  Collin told the older couple behind him to go ahead.

  “Bre, it was nice visiting everyone, but I need to get back. I have school.” He was trying to play it cool. I got it, for Austin’s sake.

  “Bre, look!” Rebecca ran up, pointing at the board above our heads.

  We all looked up to see every flight canceling before us. Collin’s eyes flashed to meet mine, silent relief on both of our faces.

  “Hang on,” Collin said as he slipped away from the line and went up to a gentlemen standing behind a podium. He talked to him for a minute before turning around with a huge smile. He walked back to us.

  “Well?” I asked impatiently.

  “Every flight is canceled until further notice because of the weather,” he breathed.

  “So do we wait here?” Austin asked.

  “Unfortunately, yes. But at least I have more time.” He grinned at me.

  Austin looked at his watch and sighed, “I can’t stay with you. I have work today. Gotta leave right now if I want to make it in time.”

  “We can’t just leave Collin here all alone. Can’t you call in sick or something?” I questioned.

  His words were sharp. “No. Maria and Stacy have the flu, you know that.”

  My heart sank. Now that I had more time with Collin, I couldn’t stay because I was the one who drove everyone today.

  I felt my face crinkle with disappointment. “I guess I’ll take you back.”

  “I can take him,” Rebecca offered. “I um, told my parents I’d be right home after we dropped Collin off anyway. I didn’t do my chores yesterday and they’re expecting me. Don’t want any more trouble with them.” Of course, that was a lie. Becka and chores, those two words were never in the same sentence. “Bre, just call me when you’re ready to be picked up.”

  Austin was hesitant. “Thanks Rebecca. Collin, is that alright? Sorry to leave you like this.”

  Collin nodded like nothing was amiss. “I understand, don’t worry about it. I’ll see you in a month.”

  In a month? He was coming back and didn’t tell me? My hope rose.

  “Alright,” Austin said reluctantly. He turned to
me. “You okay with this?” Talking to me was hard for him, and my heart clenched with guilt. I tried to be calm and not give myself away.

  Nonchalantly, I said, “That’s fine, I don’t mind.”

  “Well then,” Austin took a deep breath. He lowered his head a little, looking up at me through his eyelashes, “Thanks.” The guys said their goodbyes with a one-armed tap on the back, and then Austin walked away fast. Beck had to run to catch up with him.

  Collin was staring at me funny.

  “What?” I smiled.

  “I think someone didn’t want me to leave just yet.” His pearly, white teeth smiled.

  “Yeah well…” Again, that little voice was screaming at me to tell him, and again I couldn’t find the words to say. I smiled back, embarrassed, and changed the tone of the conversation. “What was ‘see you next month’ all about?”

  His bright smiled faded instantly. “Austin’s coming to visit me and my dad next month.”

  “Oh,” I looked away with a heavy sadness.

  He raised my chin up with his finger, forcing me to look at him. He was so attractive that I could barely stand it. In a silky, tender voice he uttered softly, “Bre, I will come back…there’s no way I could stay away from you for very long.”

  “You say that now,” I whispered.

  “I promise.” He pulled me into his chest and held me. His embrace was something I had longed for, and now being in his arms was better than I dreamed it would be. I had visualized it, but never fully felt every emotion that I was experiencing now. I listened to his rapid heart, sputtering every time I would move slightly, his muscles flexed as he tenderly squeezed me tighter and his fragrance circled in the air, making me melt. I didn’t want this moment to end. I wanted to remember this for the rest of my life. I held onto him tighter.

  Hours passed by with no signs of the weather letting up, the thick fog rolled in blanketing the runway. The temperature was dropping every hour as the sky blackened. Rows of planes sat idle in front of the window where we lounged. No movement was coming in or out of the airport, and every seat was filled in the waiting areas.

  I could feel the tension and frustration around us, but Collin and I were completely unaffected. We sat there, taking the opportunity to learn more about each other. We were shocked at how much we had in common, even as we realized how different our two worlds really were. He had lived in the city practically his entire life with very little time spent here in Oregon. The last time he remembered being here was on his tenth birthday and he hated every bit of it. He said he wanted to be back with his father so badly that he made life with Katherine miserable so he would never have to come back again, and somehow it had worked until now.

  “What was so bad about this place that you didn’t want to ever come back?” I wondered.

  “I was bitter and mad,” Collin said, remembering a time long ago.

  “At what?”

  It took him a few seconds to answer. I could see torment in his eyes as he began to speak about it. “At my mom mostly, for letting me go…for allowing my father to split my brother and I up…I know it sounds unreasonable, because my father was the main reason why my parents didn’t have joint custody. It hurts that she didn’t fight harder for me, she just gave up.” His pained eyes stared at the gray floor beneath us.

  “Are you sure she didn’t fight for you? You were so young back then…have you asked her yourself?”

  “No, but my father told me she agreed to it right away to make things easier for them.”

  “That doesn’t sound like Katherine.” I shook my head. “She doesn’t seem to be the type of person who would just let her child go like that. I see how much she loves Austin. I know she must love you too; the entire time you were here she wanted to know everything going on in your life.”

  “Yeah well, she is that type,” he objected harshly.

  I sat back, not expecting that response out of him. He glanced at me, tense. “It’s going to take me a long time to forgive her,” he paused. “Can we talk about something else not so depressing…what about your family? What’s your family like?”

  “If you don’t want to talk about depressing stuff, then I don’t think we should talk about my family. Actually, it might make you feel better. You know the adage, ‘you don’t feel so bad when you find out other people have it worse than you do’?”

  “I want to know everything about your life, the good and bad.” He looked bothered by my statement.

  How could I say no when he looked at me like that? I thought about my mother and envied Collin a little. “I would only be so lucky if I didn’t have my mother in my life.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “My mother wishes I would just disappear.”

  “There is no way she thinks that.”

  “She does,” I said slightly disheartened.

  “Why would you say that?” Collin sounded genuinely concerned.

  “Because that’s exactly what she told me.”

  He was silent, but his face said it all. I didn’t want him to be sad on my account. I had learned to accept this as truth. It was pointless to dwell on something that would never change.

  “San Francisco?” I changed the conversation quickly. “It must be nice living in a big city like that.”

  “Yeah, I love it there.” His face lit up and his mood changed.

  “Tell me about it?” I asked.

  “You mean you’ve never been there before?”

  “No. I’ve never been anywhere really…my father never took us on vacations. The farthest I’ve ever traveled was up to Portland.”

  “Wow… sounds like you’re going to have to come visit me sometime soon.” He smiled at me. “San Francisco is nothing like here. It’s always moving and busy. There’s so much to do you would never get bored. There’s a lot of culture, different types of people. I tell you, some of my favorite times are just sitting at a coffee shop and people watching.”

  My heart tugged as I pictured myself at that coffee shop with Collin someday.

  “My favorite place to be is right under the Golden Gate Bridge at sunset. I don’t know, there’s something magical there; the water beneath you and the bridge towering overhead; the lights from the city reflecting off the water and the vibrant colors in the sky…it’s breathtaking.”

  “It sounds incredible,” I rested my cheek on my hand. “I hope to see it someday.”

  “You will,” he promised me with that glimmering smile again.

  “So tell me more about your dad. What’s he like?” I asked.

  “He’s a very busy man, always gone because of work. He travels a lot, always on business trips, flying all over the world to places like Florida, Hawaii, China. You name it, he’s been there. I used to be able to travel with him, but my school work started to suffer and I was forced to stay home. When he’s away, I live with my aunt who lives just down the street from us.”

  “Did he ever get remarried?”

  “No… he’s dated here and there but it never works out. In the end, it’s always his job that interferes and eventually ends his relationships.” He looked away for a quick second.

  “You said you stay with your aunt?”

  He nodded. “My father’s younger sister, Julie. She’s like a mother to me. Actually, we’re more like best friends than anything.”

  “Is she married?” I questioned.

  “No, not yet. I guess she hasn’t found that one special person.” He looked directly into my eyes as he said that and I blushed, again.

  “Hey!” I remembered something important. “I never got your number or e-mail or anything. How are we supposed to make this work if I can’t talk to you?”

  “Do you have some paper?”

  “No,” I said, standing up to see if there was a vender close by so I could grab a piece of paper or a napkin.

  “There’s some,” he said.

  I turned and looked down at him.

  “Where?”

  �
��Your back pocket.”

  “What?” I reached into my pocket and sure enough there was a folded paper wedged in it. I wasn’t sure what it was until I saw the red ink on the back of one of the papers. Unfolding it slowly, the night of Eve’s party came to me and made me feel unsettled. Unanswered questions rushed back, taking me back to that night.

  “Bre, are you alright?”

  “No…no not really,” I spoke hesitantly and slightly foggy, as if I was off in another place.

  “What is that?”

  “I really don’t know.” I examined both the note from her parents and the class schedule that had been changed. I flipped the note over and looked at the writing in red ink. I remembered noticing it that night, but I never really had the chance to read it. It was a name ― Lapsus? It looked so familiar to me, like I had seen it more than once, but where?

  “What do you mean, you don’t know?” Collin took both papers and studied them.

  “Who is this Eve and why do you have these?”

  “Well…” Then I remembered I had the plane ticket also. I reached back into my pocket and grabbed the slick thin ticket. I sat back down next to Collin and turned it over and over in my fingers, explaining everything. From the first time I saw Eve to why Austin missed his flight. It just spewed out of my mouth without me thinking about it.

  After I finished, it took him a second to gather his thoughts.

  “So…that explains why Austin didn’t come. He was vague when he told us he wasn’t coming, and now it all makes sense.”

  I looked at him almost in disbelief. I couldn’t believe that he didn’t think I was completely out of my mind. “Wow,” I breathed, astonished.

  “What?” Collin asked.

  “I can’t believe you’re not running away from me right now, thinking I’m some kind of lunatic.”