Surprise Delivery

by D. J. Jamison

  Casper hissed, the violent throb in his ankle reminding him that he was not up for strenuous fucking.

  “Your ankle,” Eric said, disentangling himself. Casper tried to grab him and missed as he scrambled off the side of the bed.

  “Don’t go,” he gasped.

  “Shh,” Eric said, taking hold of his legs and carefully lifting them onto the bed. He manhandled Casper into a more vertical position — head on his pillow, feet pointing toward the footboard — then grabbed a couple of throw pillows and propped them carefully under Casper’s ankle. “Let me get you some painkillers.”

  Casper groaned, letting his head fall back to the pillow. “I don’t want you to take care of me. I want you to take care of me.”

  Eric laughed at the sexual innuendo. “Painkillers, then orgasms.”

  “Fuck, yes,” he breathed, relieved to hear Eric confirm what he wanted. Eric left the room, and Casper stripped off his shirt while he waited, and attempted to take off his basketball shorts. He had one leg free, and the shorts bunched over his sprained ankle as he cursed. He wasn’t flexible enough to pull them off without moving his leg.

  “You’re eager,” Eric said in amusement. “I can help you.”

  He came up to the bedside and handed Casper two pills and a glass of water. “Swallow,” he said with a smirk, “and I’ll take over the hand job.”

  He winked playfully, and Casper’s insides fluttered. He’d never seen Eric so playful. He’d been sexy and wild and uninhibited at moments, but never playful. This was a new side to him. He wasn’t sure what brought it out. Happiness to be with Casper again? Freedom to not worry what Casper thought because it was just one more night, a farewell fuck? He couldn’t begin to guess.

  Eric grasped the shorts and stretched the elastic wide, carefully pulling it off with as little pain to Casper as possible. Once they were off, Eric slipped his fingers under the waistband of Casper’s boxer briefs and raised his eyebrows.

  “Fuck, yes,” Casper said.

  He found himself stripped naked in short order. Eric, still fully dressed, stood over him. Casper’s cock was hard, curved up against his abdomen, while Eric stared down at him with a frustratingly neutral expression.

  “Well?” Casper asked. “Get naked, man, so I can suck your dick.”

  Eric snorted. “That’s what you want most?”

  “Hmm. Well, I wouldn’t mind you blowing me either,” he said, “but I’m not up for too many acrobatics with this ankle.”

  Eric smiled and started unbuttoning his shirt. “How about we do both?”

  ***

  The next morning, Casper fumbled for his phone as it rang incessantly. He felt groggy, not because he couldn’t sleep, but because Eric had kept him up half the night with hand jobs and blow jobs. They’d kissed and touched and come at least three times each.

  “’Lo,” he rasped, his voice still hoarse from sleep.

  “Casper, tell me you’re coming to my wedding,” Rose said sharply in his ear. “Because I don’t see an RSVP here, and it’s only a week away.”

  He groaned. “Time is it?”

  “It’s late enough you should be at work, you slug!” she said. “Did you tie one on last night or something?”

  “Or something.”

  Eric shifted next to him, and Casper trailed his hand down the broad expanse of his back. Eric sighed into his pillow, still sleeping, so he lifted his hand away and tried to tune in to what Rose was saying.

  “You told Mom you’d come back for the wedding.”

  “Relax, I’ll be there. Sorry I forgot to RSVP,” he said. “I’ll buy my plane ticket today.”

  “Okay,” she said, slightly mollified. “Shall I put you down for a plus one?”

  He glanced at the man in his bed, so much unresolved between them, including Casper’s feelings. “Uh, no. Just me.”

  “I could set you up with Jory’s cousin. He’s cute and gay.”

  He gave a laughing groan. “No, thanks, sis. I’m sure I can find a horny bridesmaid or bridegroom to hook up with. People always want to have sex at wedding receptions.”

  “Ugh, you’re such a pig,” she said. “You should stop fucking around and get on with your life.”

  “Yeah, um, I gotta run,” he said, cutting her short before she got on a soap box about Kage being dead and gone and Casper having love to give to someone. He hit disconnect, then glanced down, expecting to see Eric sleeping. Instead, blue eyes glared up at him.

  “Eric …”

  Eric whipped off the covers and began hunting for his clothes. He snagged boxer briefs and tugged them up, then slid his arms into his button-up shirt.

  “You don’t have to go,” he said, while watching Eric do a strip tease in reverse, buttoning each button on that shirt, now wrinkled and giving him a morning-after sex god look.

  “This was a mistake,” Eric said, as he grabbed his pants from the floor. He stepped into them, yanked up the zipper and buttoned them. “We got caught up in the moment, but it can’t happen again.”

  “Just wait,” Casper said.

  Eric shook his head. “We already agreed there was no future here,” he said, waving a hand between them. “I’m just sex to you, the equivalent of a horny groomsman at your sister’s wedding. Fuck, I didn’t even know you had a sister!”

  “Eric, that was a joke,” Casper said, feeling fear claw at his belly. “I’m not really going to look for a hookup.”

  “But you’re also not asking me to be your plus one.”

  Casper opened his mouth. Closed it. He didn’t know what to say. Part of him wanted to give Eric the answer he wanted. Invite him along. But this was his sister’s wedding. His family. He couldn’t take Eric to that wedding unless he was positive he was ready to let go of Kage and give a serious, long-term relationship a try. He’d fucked up with Eric too much already; he didn’t want to lead him on again. He had to be all in or stay away.

  He never should have initiated sex the night before. At this rate, he’d be lucky if Eric didn’t hate his guts.

  “Forget it,” Eric said. “I already know your answer.”

  “Fuck, I’m sorry,” Casper said. “About everything, and last night—”

  Eric leaned over and kissed him gently. His eyes cleared of the anger that had been there moments ago. “It’s okay, Cas. Last night was about ending things on a high note, and nothing more. Let’s not ruin our goodbye now.”

  Casper wasn’t sure he liked that answer, but he didn’t have a better one.

  He lifted his hand to Eric’s jaw, cupped it, and drew him in for one more sweet kiss. When Eric drew back, he closed his eyes, unable to watch him leave.

  “If you change your mind about what you want, you know where to find me.”

  Casper nodded, his eyes still clenched tight. He heard Eric’s footsteps echo across his hardwood floor. Heard the front door shut. Heard a car engine start.

  Go after him, he admonished himself. Don’t let him leave.

  But he didn’t move, paralyzed by fear. Fear of the unknown, fear of the future, fear of truly moving on. If he let himself go there, let himself love Eric, he was afraid he’d be letting Kage’s memory die as much as his body had all those years ago. He didn’t want to lose Kage again, even if it was only from his own heart.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Laura dropped into the seat across from Eric at Javalicious, an iced cappuccino with frothy whipped cream and syrup on top. “Okay, I’m here. Start talking.”

  Eric clenched his teeth to keep back an annoyed retort. His patience was razor thin after the break-up with Casper. Then the idiocy of falling back into bed with him while knowing nothing had changed. He’d always known, at some level, that Casper’s heart wasn’t for him. He’d just wanted to believe in a future where it could be.

  Kage was lucky to have a man who loved him so much. Perry’s heart wasn’t loyal to me, and I was alive and breathing in his bed.

  As much as he wanted to be pissed at Casper,
he couldn’t. How could he be mad at a man for loving his dead boyfriend? That would make Eric a horrible person. Maybe, if he were stronger, he could persuade Casper to have a relationship, or Eric could give up on the romantic notion of love and commitment. But he didn’t think that was a compromise he could make. He wanted someone to love him as much as Casper loved Kage. At forty-six, it was likely he’d never find that. He was too old for the dating game, and this interlude with Casper had shown him that he didn’t have the thick skin to weather the heartache that came with it.

  Dealing with Laura was the last thing he wanted just now, but he was worried about Olivia. He knew she had been close to her mom before their falling out, and that she needed a mother’s comfort more than his clumsy attempts to console her.

  “Olivia is having a hard time at school.”

  Laura raised her eyebrows. “And? You’ve decided to play parent, haven’t you? This is part of having responsibility.”

  Eric took a sip of his coffee to give himself time to rein in his temper. He knew Laura was angry, and she was just taking that anger out on him. She cared about Olivia; if she didn’t, she wouldn’t still be meeting up with her once a week for dinner and a movie.

  “I’m trying here, Laura.”

  She stirred her frothy drink with a straw, seemingly nervous.

  “Olivia told me that man at your house was your boyfriend, not some stranger.”

  “Really? You want to do this now?”

  Her shoulders jerked in an uncomfortable shrug. “I’m trying here.”

  Eric smiled ruefully. “We were dating. Now, we’re not. Either way, he was there because Olivia wasn’t. I’m not running a den of iniquity.”

  “I know,” she said with a sigh. “I was just feeling so threatened that day. My daughter chose you over me—”

  “She chose to be a mother,” Eric argued. “She’d be home if you’d support her choice to keep Peanut.”

  Laura laughed, surprising him. “She’s got you calling the baby that silly nickname.”

  Eric smiled. “Better than ‘it.’”

  She nodded, sipping her drink. “Tell me about the problem at school.”

  Finally, a cease to the hostilities. A peace offering.

  Eric explained about the rumors Olivia’s ex-boyfriend was spreading and the persistent harassment from a handful of boys at school.

  “I know you think premarital sex is a sin, but almost everyone in modern society commits it.”

  Laura raised fingers to her temples. “It’s never that simple. Saying other people make this mistake doesn’t absolve you from sin.”

  “Works for the politicians,” Eric grumbled.

  She pretended she didn’t hear that. “These boys are behaving terribly though. It’s not their place to judge, and especially not based on a lie. I’ll talk to Livvie. If I need to go to the principal, I will.”

  “Thanks. I think Olivia just needs a mom. She needs comfort and—”

  “I understand,” she said sharply.

  Eric considered his words carefully. “I was talking with a friend a while back. I told him there’s no such thing as unconditional love. He said, maybe not, but isn’t it better not to know that? To believe in the love of a parent?”

  “What’s your point?”

  “Maybe Olivia needs to believe your love isn’t conditional. She needs to know you’ll love her, flaws and all.”

  “I do. Of course, I do.”

  “So be there for her,” he said. Then, as much as it pained him to say it, he added, “If you honestly want Olivia to come home, it’s not too late.”

  ***

  Casper left his office with a feeling of weariness that had little to do with his work. He’d recovered from the sprain enough to give up the crutches after two days, but he was still in pain. And not because of his ankle.

  He replayed his last night with Eric on repeat, then that morning after when he’d reaffirmed for Eric that they were done. He felt awful about hurting Eric. Again. He regretted that, though he wouldn’t give back that last night together for anything. That probably made him a selfish dick, but there it was. Now, he had to live with the aftermath. Mostly, heartache, horniness, and a guilty conscience.

  He’d been distracted, short-tempered, and had still failed to buy the airline ticket to his sister’s wedding. Rose had an entire week of wedding festivities planned in their hometown, and Casper was already missing some of them. At this rate, he’d be lucky to motivate himself to go at all — another dickhead move in a series of them.

  Stop feeling so damn sorry for yourself.

  He was halfway to his car when he spotted the pregnant woman. She looked due any day, and he didn’t recognize her as one of his patients, but he couldn’t imagine why else she’d be there.

  “Office hours are over,” he called. “Unless this is an emergency?”

  He eyed her, looking for signs of distress. Instead of the frantic worry new mothers so often expressed, she smiled wide.

  “I’m not a patient,” she said. “What I am is a pissed-off, very pregnant woman who will not hesitate to kick your ass.”

  Casper was taken aback. Typically, his mothers loved him. “Excuse me?”

  She rested one hand on the small of her back and sighed. “Let me start over. I’m Macy. My brother is marrying your sister, Rose. Ring any bells?”

  “Uh-oh.”

  She laughed, a tinkling yet dangerous sound. “That’s right, mister. You can see why I won’t be at my brother’s wedding this weekend,” she said, gesturing to her pregnant belly. “That doesn’t explain why you haven’t shown up for the wedding week festivities. Your sister has been trying to call you for days, and frankly, sir, you’re an asshole for stressing out a bride like this.”

  Casper winced. “I, uh, haven't been answering my private number for anyone. My emergency line—”

  “Your sister shouldn’t have to pretend to be a patient to get you to answer.”

  “No, you’re right,” he said, suitably chastised. Macy had the scolding tone down to an art form. He ventured a guess this pregnancy wasn’t her first.

  “Now, we’re getting somewhere. How about you take a tired, pregnant woman out for dinner? I’m starving, and I need to sit down, and I’m not up to making the drive to Emporia again today.”

  Casper’s eyebrows jumped. “You drove from Emporia?”

  “My brother’s bride is freaking, which means he’s freaking. I live close by, and it’s not like either of them could fly across the country to fetch you. But this means the world to your sister.”

  “My car’s this way,” Casper said. “I’ll buy you dinner for your trouble.”

  “Thank you.”

  “And if you go into labor, I suppose I can pinch hit.”

  She laughed. “Don’t joke. It could happen.”

  “Believe me, I know.”

  ***

  Casper took Macy to a small Italian bistro and made sure they were seated in a cushy booth. Then he plied her with breadsticks for his own protection. They both had water because Macy couldn’t have wine in her condition and Casper would be risking his well-being by drinking it in front of her.

  “When are you due?” he said. “Two weeks?”

  “Good guess, Doctor,” she said. “Fifteen days exactly, and I can’t wait to get this jumping bean out of my body.”

  He chuckled. Talking to expecting mothers was something he knew how to do. “You know that driving down here was a risk. The same reason your doctor advises you not to travel applies whether on the ground or in the air.”

  “Yes, well, I don’t plan to be in Ashe for a week, so I took a gamble. My brother’s bride is a frazzled mess, which means Jory is a frazzled mess.”

  Casper grimaced. “I’ll call tonight.”

  “You better,” she said without heat. “You have to understand, Dr. Rollins—”

  “Call me Casper, please.”

  “Casper,” she said with a nod, as the waitress arrived at
the table to rattle off a list of specials. Casper chose the first thing on the list because he didn’t want to think about what to order. Chicken-something with a creamy sauce. It wasn’t as if he could go wrong with Italian. Macy was much more specific in her order.

  “Eggplant parmesan, extra eggplant,” she said. “Also, those fried lasagna bites for an appetizer, okay? Thanks.”

  “Hungry?” Casper teased.

  Macy turned back to him as the waitress hurried away. “I’ve been craving eggplant like nobody’s business. Two points for taking me to Italian.”

  He grinned. “Good. I could use the brownie points.”

  “I’m sure you could,” she said, ripping a bite off another breadstick. She swallowed and took a sip of water. “Listen, Casper, I’m sure you’ve got your reasons for being a no-show. The thing is, I can’t be there and my other brother, Benji, got himself into some trouble. He was supposed to be the best man.”

  “What kind of trouble?”

  “The kind with jail cells.”

  “Ouch. What did he do?”

  She sighed, leaning forward and lowering her voice. “He says he broke into his buddy’s house because he loaned the guy a hundred bucks and he wouldn’t pay him back. But, it just so happens that the window he climbed in belonged to his friend’s daughter.”

  “Oh.”

  “His very young daughter,” she said, raising her eyebrows. “She got quite the scare, and now he’s facing some possible indecent liberty charges.”

  “Did he touch her?”

  She straightened and squared her shoulders. Then shook her head. “He wouldn’t have.”

  “But—”

  She lifted a finger, and he fell silent. “I know,” she said. “I know it looks bad, but I know my brother. I believe he did a stupid, criminal thing, but he’s not a child molester.”

  He frowned. “Of course. I’m sorry.”

  She waved off his apology. “I recognize that look in your eye, but I assure you that Jory is the sweetest, most upstanding guy you’ll meet. He’ll be a good husband.”