Falling, Fallen- Reese

by RaeAnne Hadley

  “What was it then?” Reese demanded.

  “I had a panic attack brought on by stress. The doc said it could’ve been worse and if I didn’t change my ways, it would put me back in the ER with a heart attack. So I changed. I’m meditating every day, watching what I eat and enjoying my day to day activities.”

  “What about the drinking and carousing?” Ryker shook his head.

  “I don’t drink at home anymore, just enjoy a few drinks when we come here, and as far as the women, well, they make me a happy man so why not? I’m honest with them all and let them know I’m not interested in a serious relationship. It’s amazing how fun a woman can be when she knows upfront exactly where she stands.”

  Reese clenched his fist threateningly. “If this ever happens again and you don’t tell me, I swear I’ll give you that heart attack.” He grabbed Jackson and pulled him in for a quick hug, pounding his back roughly. “I love you, man.”

  Jackson slapped Reese’s back. “I love you too. I’ll let you guys know but honestly, I’m doing good.”

  “Um, excuse me.”

  All three men whirled towards the intruding, sweet voice and found a tall brunette with the softest doe eyes staring at Jackson.

  “I didn’t mean to interrupt but I was wondering if you would like to dance?”

  Jackson pushed his mug into Ryker’s hands, never taking his eyes off of the pretty young thing. “I would love to dance. I’m done talking with my brothers for now anyway.”

  She giggled as he took her hand and led her to the dancefloor.

  Ryker and Reese watched the couple make their way around the wooden floor.

  “How does he do that? He doesn’t even have to pursue them, they just come flocking to him.”

  Reese shook his head. “I have no idea. I wish he could teach that.”

  Ryker elbowed his big brother in the ribs, laughing. “Right? We’d all be rich.”

  “How would you all be rich?”

  For a second time, the boys were startled by a feminine voice.

  Reese turned to find himself staring into the deepest sapphire eyes; familiar eyes. He couldn’t help his smile. “How women come flocking towards Jackson every time we come here.”

  Rachel laughed. “Oh, that’s easy. He has a reputation for being unattainable. There are bets going on as to who can land him. Last I heard the pot was up to two thousand dollars.”

  The brothers looked at each other before busting into laughter.

  “He doesn’t have a secret technique?” Reese asked, tears streaming down his face.

  Ryker sobered for a moment. “Hey, then why isn’t that happening for me?”

  Rachel shook her head. “Because all the ladies know that you’re an easy target. You wear your heart on your sleeve, Ryker. You aren’t a challenge.”

  At Ryker’s fallen face, Reese erupted into another bout of laughter. Ryker scowled at his brother. “I’m not easy.”

  Rachel joined Reese’s laughter. “Actually, Ryker, you are. When was the last time you had a one-night-stand?”

  “I never have…”

  “Exactly.” Having proven her point, Rachel took a sip of her red drink. Reese watched her plump lips wrap around her straw and he felt a stirring he hadn’t felt in a long time. Shifting uncomfortably, he turned and filled his glass again.

  “The reason I came over was I wanted to see if you would like to dance.”

  He didn’t turn to face her right away, taking his time to figure out if he wanted to risk being that close to her again. He took a deep breath and turned towards her. Her blue eyes searching his. “I would love to dance with you.”

  She smiled and he could see the relief wash over her face. She had been nervous, afraid he would turn her down. He found that puzzling and realized she didn’t hold all of the cards after all.

  He gently grabbed her hand, ignoring the spark that shot up his arm and dissipated through his body. She clenched onto his hand as if it were a lifeline. They found a clearing on the dance floor and he placed his arms on her hips, pulling her slightly closer.

  Doin’ Fine by Lauren Alaina started playing and Rachel wrapped her arms around his neck and fashioned her body next to his. He had forgotten how well they fit together.

  When she rested her head on his shoulder, he allowed himself to relax. Closing his eyes, he smelled her scent and indulged the memories of the past. Silky skin rubbing against his course; sweet sweat mixing with virile.

  His body began to respond to the combination of memories and the warm body pressed against his. He frantically began trying to think of things that would calm his ravenous desire but she snuggled closer and there was no hiding the evidence of his desire.

  She didn’t say anything when she looked up into his eyes. The desire was just as obvious on her face. When she closed her eyes and parted her lips, he started to move in for the kiss but a demon from the past flashed through his mind.

  Reese, I just don’t see it working between us. You are a great guy but I’m just not interested in a serious relationship. I hope you have a wonderful life. You’ll find someone who makes you happy.

  He felt the nausea come on hard and he stepped back from her. The confusion and pain in her eyes stabbed at his heart but the poison of that memory beat stronger. He shook his head and took another step back. “I’m sorry. I’ve got to go.”

  He turned and walked out of the bar, his brothers watching his retreat.

  His phone blew up on the way home and he turned it off. He didn’t care if they were from his brothers or from Rachel. He couldn’t go down that path again; it almost destroyed him the first time.

  He pulled into his driveway but instead of going inside, he began walking down to the corrals. He needed some fresh air to clear his thoughts. Stetson came running out and joined him, his tail wagging furiously.

  He placed a boot on the lowest board of the corral and rested his arms on the top. Staring at his sleepy cattle, he let the memories, both past and present, flood his mind. He needed to get a grip on his emotions and figure out what he was going to do. It wouldn’t do anyone any good if he was hot and cold all of the time. She deserved to know where he stood. But did she really?

  The small, revengeful part of him wanted to make her suffer and experience the pain he was dealt fifteen years ago. The pain of his crushed heart.

  He shook his head. Revenge did nothing for anyone. It wouldn’t make him feel better; it would only make him feel worse knowing that he hurt her on purpose.

  Walking back to the house, he decided that he would take the next couple of days to figure out what he was going to do and then be honest with Rachel. If he decided to open his heart again to her, he needed to know if she was interested in a long-term relationship or if it was just going to be friends-with-benefits. And he had to figure out if he was okay with the latter. Both of them deserved that so they could get on with their lives.

  He got undressed and climbed into bed, leaving his phone turned off. He wished his mind could be as easily turned off. The sky was turning pink when his mind finally allowed his body the quiet it craved.

  Pounding on his front door and Stetson’s barking brought him to the land of the living. He groaned as his body protested to the couple hours sleep. The pounding persisted.

  “I’m coming, damn it! Hold your horses.” He threw on his jeans, not bothering to button them up and shuffled to the door. Ryker’s white face filled Reese with dread and he quickly unlatched the door.

  “Ryker, what’s wrong?”

  Ryker shoved past his brother before turning on him. “Why haven’t you answered your phone? We’ve been trying to get a hold of you for hours.”

  “I turned it off. I didn’t want to be bothered. What is wrong? Is Jackson okay?”

  Ryker nodded his head. “Jackson’s fine. He’s on his way to Mom’s house,” he turned haunted eyes on Reese. “Mom had a stroke. She’s in the hospital.”

  Bile rose in Reese’s gut and he wiped a hand over
his face. “I’ll get Bill to come watch the ranch and take care of the place. I can be packed in five minutes.”

  “I already contacted Bill. He and his boys are taking care of both ranches. Go pack. I want to be on the road in less than five.”

  Reese ran to his room and shoved clean clothes into a duffle bag. He didn’t give a shit if anything was wrinkled. He heard Ryker feed Stetson, the dog food hitting the metal bowl like rain hitting a metal roof. He grabbed his cell phone as he slung the bag over his shoulder. Shoving his Stetson on his head, he followed Ryker out of the house. It was going to be the longest three hours of his life.

  They made it in some bit less than three hours, Ryker blazing through the canyon at break neck speed. Several times Reese closed his eyes and prayed to the good Lord above that he would spare them both. His prayers were answered and they pulled up to Poudre Valley Hospital unscathed and miraculously, no speeding tickets either.

  Jackson was sitting beside their mother in her room. She was sleeping peacefully and for a moment, Reese wondered if she was dead. Her breathing was so shallow that the blankets barely moved. Jackson quietly and softly lay her hand back on the bed, stood up and motioned for them to step outside so they could talk without disturbing her.

  “You guys made it here quick,” Jackson commented before turning to Reese. “Why didn’t you answer your phone, jackass?”

  Reese put up his hands to ward off Jackson’s attack. “Save it bro. I already got my ass handed to me by Ryker, for three hours. I got it. I will never turn off my phone again.”

  “Two and a half hours,” Ryker corrected. “That was some primo driving.”

  Reese felt tired, irritated and wasn’t in the mood for any more ass chewing. “Just tell us what’s going on with Mom.”

  “She had a TIA or transient ischemic stroke. The doc called it a mini stroke and that Mom was very lucky. The blood clot that caused it was small and it only caused a block for less than two minutes. Unfortunately, he said it’s a warning that she could have a bigger stroke in the future. She has to change her medications and diet and she’s supposed to eliminate as much stress in her life right now as possible.”

  “Cattle ranching as a widow can’t be easy. She’s still grieving Dad,” Ryker pointed out.

  Reese ran his hand through his blonde hair. “I thought Jack was handling that aspect of the business.”

  Jackson shook his head. “Nope. He’s now wearing the hats of the general manager and cow boss. He had to fire the last guy. Found him stealing some of the steers.”

  “Why in the hell wasn’t I told about all of this?”

  Ryker cleared his throat. “Because you are working on your own ranch, have kids to think of and your own plate full.”

  “Bullshit. I’m never too busy for Mom.”

  “And we know that,” Jackson soothed. “But Ryker and I are both single with no kids. It didn’t seem like a big deal because we caught the guy and got all of the steers back safe and sound.”

  “Well don’t do it again. I’m a part of this family. I deserve to know and have input. I grew up on that ranch too.”

  Ryker nodded. “You got it. No more keeping Reese out of the loop.” He turned to Jackson. “So how are we going to ease Mom’s stress?”

  Reese didn’t like the way Jackson was staring at the floor and the hesitation with his answer. He kept his mouth shut, waiting to hear what Jackson was already thinking.

  “I already talked with Mom about this but I think we should sell the ranch. She can move in with me or we can even buy her a small patio home where the yard is all taken care of. She can live wherever she wants.”

  “Hell no!” Both Reese and Ryker snapped.

  “Hear me out before you go raising your hackles,” Jackson growled. “When Mom goes, which I hope will be a long time from now, which one of us is going to give up their lives to come down and run the ranch? Will it be you, Ryker? Or you, Reese?

  “Face the facts. Nobody wants to live in this town anymore. It’s gotten too big; the culture is changing and it’s turning into more of a yuppie town than the quiet rural community we grew up with. This is not my ideal place to raise my kids when and if I decide to settle down.”

  Reese opened his mouth to argue but realized his arguments sounded childish and petulant. He wasn’t down here very often, maybe every three months and even then, it was only for a few days. He was busy with his own ranch and he loved where he lived. There was no way he’d want to give up his idea of paradise; even for the family ranch.

  The idea of selling it though, hurt his soul. He turned hopefully towards Ryker. “Wouldn’t you want it, Ryker?”

  Ryker shifted uncomfortably. “Not really, Reese. I don’t want to work hard like you guys are. I enjoy helping others build their ranching dreams and being able to travel. I don’t want to be tied to one place.”

  Reese looked hopefully at Jackson but already knew the answer. They all lived in the same town because of its beautiful location and tight knit community. Surrounded by mountains, they loved where they lived and had all talked of raising their kids there.

  “What did Mom say about this?”

  “She doesn’t want to give it up to some stranger either but she had been thinking about it since Dad died. She wants to sell it to Jack.”

  “That makes sense. He’s always been like an uncle to us,” Ryker conceded.

  “For how much?”

  “One million.”

  Reese felt his temper explode. “One million? It’s got to be worth at least five. With all of that prime pasture land and the two homes? Hell, the water rights alone are worth a million.”

  Jackson placed his hand on Reese’s shoulder. “She wants it to stay in good hands. Jack has done right by us for over twenty years. He loves the land and the cattle as much as we do and she knows he’ll take care of it the way Dad did.”

  “Boys? Is that you I hear arguing outside my door?”

  They walked back into the room, Mom sitting up in her bed. Ryker went to the far side and took Jackson’s seat while Reese made his way to her side. He gently took her hand. “How are you feeling, Mom?”

  “Better than earlier. I had the worst headache in the world. The doctors here are doing a wonderful job of getting me to where I can go home.”

  She smiled up at her middle son and Reese was struck by how closely she and Ryker looked alike. Other than the red tint in Ryker’s hair, they had the same deep blue eyes.

  He smiled back at her and his heart swelled with sorrow and love. She looked older than she had just a few months ago. It wasn’t fair to put that kind of pressure on her. Running the ranch had been Dad’s dream. She deserved retirement, playing with her grandchildren and sipping lemonade on the porch swing. He suddenly knew what had to be done.

  “How about coming and living with me, Mom? Jake and Jennifer are growing up so fast and you are missing so much. This way you could see them almost every day and I wouldn’t be by myself all of the time.”

  She patted his hand. “You are my sweet boy but honey, I couldn’t live with you,” she glanced at all three of her children. “I couldn’t live with any of you. You are all in the prime of your lives and even though you haven’t met your spouses yet, you will. I don’t want to be in the way…” she held up her hand when all three opened their mouths to argue. “and I don’t want to feel uncomfortable in the place that I live. If I want to run around my living room naked, I want to feel that I can.”

  Ryker grimaced. “Eww, Mom. Gross image.”

  Jackson punched him in the arm. “Shut up, dude.”

  “Stop hitting your brother,” she turned her attention back to Reese. “With all of that being said, I would like to move to Ridgway and be closer to my family. My life is more than half over and it’s time for a break. Did Jackson tell you who I’m going to sell the ranch to?”

  Reese nodded. “Yes, but I think we need to talk about the price.”

  She waved his words away. “Nonsense. Jack
has been with this ranch longer than any of you boys have been around. That money will give me more than enough to buy my own place and live out the rest of my days peacefully. And it will still leave a nice amount for the grandkids. And when I’m gone, you can sell the house and split the proceeds.”

  “Mom, let’s not talk about you dying. Okay?”

  She squeezed Ryker’s hand. “I know you still hurt from the loss of your father but you have to face the facts that I’m older, honey. I’ve worked hard and worn this body out. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve enjoyed every minute of it and haven’t regretted a day. But when you work and play hard, you tend to wear things out sooner than normal. I just want to enjoy the last bit of time I have left, okay?”

  All three men nodded like chastised little boys. They would do anything for the woman lying there in the hospital bed.

  Reese jumped when his butt vibrated. Grabbing his cell phone out of his pocket, he looked at who was calling him. It was unknown number and he hit decline on the screen. He was just sliding it back into his Wrangler jeans when it buzzed again. This time it was a text message from the same number.

  Hey, this is Rachel. I just heard about your Mom. I’m so sorry and hope she’s on the mend. I was hoping we could talk when you get back into town, we didn’t have that chance last night. Let me know when you get back.

  He wasn’t sure what to say so he didn’t bother to answer. Exhaustion washing over his body, he pulled up a chair to sit down next to his mother. She sat up a little taller in bed.

  “I want all three of you boys to go home and get some rest. The doctor isn’t going to be coming back to check on me unit six tonight. Greta already made breakfast for the ranch hands so there’s hot food ready for you too. You can grab some sheets and make up your beds to sleep. Come back after six just in case I get sprung from this joint.”

  “I don’t think we should leave, Mom,” Jackson argued.

  “Nonsense. I’m not going to have you boys and the hospital staff hovering over me. I can’t get any sleep that way and I need it. They come in every two hours to poke and prod me. So go on now and git. Plan on bringing me home tonight. That’s my goal.”