Lies and Lullabies

by Bowen, Sarina

  Jonas grabbed my hips and turned my body toward the bathroom mirror. “See this?” he asked. “Mine. These…” He rubbed his palms over my hips. “Mine. And this right here…” He bent to nibble at the place where my neck met my shoulder, working it with his lips and then his tongue. I bit the inside of my cheek to keep from gasping. “Mine,” he said.

  Feeling unsteady, I leaned back against Jonas, but more contact made things worse. His firm, hot body radiated heat and desire, and his ambitious erection stabbed me in the back.

  I swayed, but he caught me, wrapping me in his arms. “Mmm,” he groaned into my ear. “These,” he cupped my breasts. “Definitely keeping these.” He made that point very convincingly, too, by teasing my nipples.

  I gasped, forgetting to hold it in.

  Jonas let go of me to grab a folded towel off a stack nearby. After placing it on the counter in front of me, he took my elbows in hand and gently leaned me forward. And I did as I was asked.

  With a groan, Jonas pulled my hips back. As he curled his body around mine, I watched us in the mirror. Jonas hovered over my shoulder, his expression serious, eyes closing as his lips traced my shoulder. With one hand he cupped the side of my flushed face, and with the other, he stroked my quivering body. Then he opened his eyes, his gaze locking onto mine. I shivered with pleasure. He was impossibly sexy, the muscles in his arms flexing as he ran his hands over my ribcage. His eyes flashed in the low light, and then his forehead creased with longing. Just the desire on his face made me feel crazy.

  Without breaking eye contact, Jonas lowered our bodies slightly, pressing his hard chest against my back. Between my legs, the head of his cock massaged my opening. The slick pressure made me shiver with happiness.

  Jonas moaned. Without warning, he bent his knees and entered me in one quick slide. “Oh, fuck yes,” he gasped. I agreed, but couldn’t spare the words to say so. Because he was just so overwhelming.

  He took a steadying breath and then dropped his head to the crook of my neck, kissing me tenderly. I raised a hand to his head and held him there, my heart quivering with excitement.

  “Okay?” he asked.

  I nodded, still unable to answer.

  He curved his body around me, his forearms bracketing mine. He held my hands, his thumbs stroking toward my wrists. I watched his face in the mirror as he began to move against me in short, exquisite thrusts. His eyes fell briefly closed with pleasure, before snapping open again to meet my gaze. “I love you,” he mouthed in the mirror, that sexy mouth puckering on the last vowel.

  I groaned, pushing my bottom back against him. He flexed his hips, and I felt him so deeply that my breath caught. His tongue worshiped the nape of my neck. I turned my chin, trying to catch his mouth with my own. I wanted everything he could give me, and I wanted it right now. A frustrated huff escaped my lips.

  He chuckled, nudging my chin until I faced the mirror again. “Who is in charge here?” he asked. “Tell me.”

  “You are,” I gasped.

  “That’s right. Touch your breasts for me.”

  “What?” I asked, lost in a sex haze.

  “You heard me.” He grasped my wrists and crossed them, filling my hands with my bouncing breasts.

  “Yessss,” Jonas hissed, thrusting harder. “Good girl. You’re so beautiful.”

  Something was beautiful, that was for sure. I had never seen anything as erotic as the two bodies in the mirror. His face was flushed, his eyes heavy with arousal.

  He palmed my shoulders and pulled out. “Turn around,” he demanded, and I did. Immediately. He grasped my hips, lifting me onto the counter. “I need you to hold me while I fuck you, Sweetness.”

  His words made me groan again. I had never in my life found the f-word sexy, until I heard Jonas rasp it into my ear. With shaking hands, I found his shoulders. He pushed my knees apart, making room for himself. The newer, braver Kira could do this—she could fuck on the counter of a hotel bathroom.

  I could do it because the man who now tucked his hips tight against my body had such love in his eyes.

  With one smooth thrust, he was inside me again. I drew him closer, until my breasts rubbed against his chest with each grind of his hips.

  “Yes,” I gasped into his neck.

  “You like that?” He slipped a hand between our bodies, forking his fingers over our connection. “Come for me,” he demanded. “I want to hear you.” His lips dipped down to catch mine, and then we were kissing again.

  The multisensory assault was too much for me. “Oh…” I moaned into his mouth. I jerked my hips against his body and absolutely shook with pleasure.

  In that exquisite moment, it was hard to believe that I’d seriously considered turning my back on him tonight.

  Seventeen

  Jonas

  I swallowed each of Kira’s moans, the sound nearly finishing me off before I was ready. Holding her tightly, I took a slow, calming breath. “Beautiful,” I rasped against her lips.

  Her answer was a deep kiss, which I greedily accepted. I scooped her off the counter. Still inside her, I carried her to the bed, losing the connection only when I set her down. Kira scrambled backward, yanking down the covers. I prowled over her, admiring the sweep of her hair against the bedspread in the dim light.

  I dropped my head to take her nipple in my mouth, swirling my tongue over her perfect breast. This gorgeous body had brought my child into the world. I wished I could have been there. But there was some amount of consolation in touching her beautiful body everywhere she’d allow it. “Mine,” I whispered, moving over to show her other breast the same attention.

  Kira made a noise of argument even as she arched her back, pushing more of her breast into my mouth.

  Chuckling, I kissed my way back up her body, pausing to worship her neck and the sensitive spot below her ear.

  Then, taking my time, I nudged her legs apart. “Mine,” I whispered, teasing her entrance again.

  “Doesn’t it cut both ways?” she gasped.

  “Does it?” I teased. “Do you want what’s yours?”

  She hummed, lifting her hips. I couldn’t resist any longer. “Fine,” I whispered, sinking slowly into her.

  Kira spread herself even wider for me, making me groan. “Fuck, Kira.” I rocked into her. “So good.” My mouth dipped down to kiss a trail across her collarbone, finding the delicate pulse point at the base of her throat. The rhythm I set with my hips was like a slow, steady heartbeat. I never wanted it to end.

  She reached for me, pulling me down until I was basking in sweetness and curves. This was mine. Mine and hers. The moment belonged to both of us, and we’d waited a long time for it. Nobody had ever held me quite like this—as if she needed me to anchor her to the earth.

  “Tell me,” I demanded. “Who loves you best?”

  “Jonas…” she breathed.

  I kissed her fiercely. “That’s right, sweetness. That’s what I needed to hear.”

  “I missed you…” She sighed against my mouth. “Missed you so much.”

  The sound of those words unhooked whatever control I’d had left. “Now you’ve done it. Fuck, I have to come.” I let out a growl. Then, shaking, I planted myself deeply, and the sudden friction made Kira quiver beneath me.

  “Jonas,” she gasped, as if surprised. She arched her back, clutching my cock with her body.

  “Jesus Christ.” With a shameless moan, I clung to her as she rode it out. “So fucking beautiful.”

  Completely spent and not wanting to crush her, I rolled onto my side, taking her with me. We were both breathing hard, and I gave her slow, unfocused kisses. “I just need you, Kira,” I panted.

  She buried her face in my neck.

  I wasn’t sure how long we lay there together. I was too blissed out, and too exhausted to care.

  “I should check on Vivi,” Kira whispered eventually.

  I roused myself a little, stroking her shoulder. “Can you just open the bedroom doors? I’ll put on my sho
rts.”

  “Okay,” she agreed. She stayed in my embrace for another minute and then slid off the bed. After putting on her nightgown, she opened the door and slipped out.

  I staggered to my feet and made a brief visit to the bathroom. I put on a pair of boxers, then met Kira back in bed.

  She turned, curling into me, and I took a deep, happy breath. There was no place on earth better than where I was right now—pressed against the only woman I’d ever loved. She smelled of sunshine and fresh air, and her smooth arms encircled me, holding on tight.

  I caught Kira watching me, her eyes glinting in the dark.

  “What is it, sweetness?”

  “The condom was a smart move,” she whispered. “You don’t need more surprises from me.”

  I settled her head into the crook of my shoulder and held her tightly. “So far, your surprises are some of the best things that ever happened to me.” I felt her body go absolutely still after I spoke. I knew she’d heard me, but she didn’t reply.

  I had the wildly romantic impulse to add that maybe we should skip the condom next time. If we had another baby, I could experience all the things I missed the first time around. But I didn’t say it, because my gut told me that Kira had already put her heart as far over the line tonight as she could.

  So that could wait. I stroked her silky hair, my eyelids pleasantly heavy. I dozed off for a while. When I opened my eyes, the clock read three thirty. Kira was asleep beside me, her hair tickling my bare chest.

  During my tours, I’d often wake up in the night, my subconscious poking me to make sure I was in a safe place, and alone. But there would be no more wildness in my life. No more drunken exploits after a show. Lying here next to Kira, I knew that I wouldn’t even be tempted.

  She stirred in her sleep, and I couldn’t resist pulling her a little closer. After a moment, her fingers splayed gently on my belly, tickling the fine hairs growing there. I lay awake just listening to her breathe. I could sleep tomorrow on the bus, when I’d be all alone again.

  It wouldn’t seem so lonely, though. Not anymore.

  * * *

  The next time I woke, I knew all was well before opening my eyes. I was lying on my side, my ankles tangled with Kira’s, my hand resting on her hair.

  It was the sound of soft little footsteps that roused me. They passed by Kira’s side of the bed, then turned at my feet. There was a scramble for purchase, and then the sensation of someone crawling over my legs, trampling down the bedclothes between me and Kira.

  A warm little body filled the valley there. “Me too,” was all she said.

  I held my breath as a little hand found my forearm, resting on my skin. I lay still, afraid to move a muscle. Maybe this perfect moment might last.

  Vivi teased the hair on my arm with her fingertips, and Kira continued to breathe with a soft, sleepy rhythm.

  Kira and I would never have childless years together. We’d skipped some things that normal couples enjoyed. We’d never duck out for a late dinner on a whim, or jet off for a carelessly romantic weekend.

  But I’d squandered those years, hadn’t I? I’d done every whimsical thing that there was, and come up empty. I’d played concerts on four continents. I’d gotten drunk in every four and five star hotel you could name.

  Kira hadn’t sewn any wild oats, though. And I began to imagine all the ways I might be able to make it up to her.

  Eighteen

  Adam

  I hadn’t done the walk of shame in years. But now I stood in the hotel lobby feeling hungover and a little embarrassed.

  Last night, after warning my sister against throwing her panties at a hot musician, I’d thrown mine at the band’s sexy tour manager. Hypocritical, much?

  Technically, Kira never had to know. I could’ve snuck out of the hotel and gone home alone. But that meant making Kira and Vivi ride the T home just so I could save face.

  That would have been a chickenshit move. So instead, I used the key card I’d been given yesterday to take the elevator up to the club level. Then I tapped on the door to Jonas’s suite.

  Silence. The only thing I could hear was the pounding in my own achy head.

  I waved the card in front of the sensor and opened the door. “Knock-knock,” I said, the sound of my voice muted by plush carpeting. I ventured further into the living room, peeking through an open doorway into the master bedroom.

  What I saw there made my eyes prickle, because the three people lying quietly on the king-sized bed looked a lot like a real family. One of Vivi’s hands was on Kira’s belly, the other absently fingering her father’s wrist. It was just about the sweetest damned thing I’d ever seen.

  But it frightened me. If Mr. Hottie swept Kira off her feet and moved her to Seattle, I’d be devastated. Especially now, at this odd and stressful juncture in my life.

  Kira opened her eyes and looked right at me. Quickly, her expression turned sheepish. Sorry big brother. I went to bed with him after all.

  I gave her a wink and walked all the way into the room. I traveled around the giant bed and flopped down next to her. “So this is where the party is,” I said, followed by an involuntary groan. “Oh, my head. Kiki, do you have any aspirin in your bag?”

  “Sorry, Uncle Adam,” she said. “I didn’t plan ahead for you to party like a rock star.”

  On the far side of the bed, Jonas chuckled into his pillow. “I’ve got you covered. I travel with a quart bottle of Advil. We also need breakfast and a vat of coffee.”

  “I’m going to take a quick shower,” Kira said. “Move, Adam.”

  “Make me,” I said, my eyes closed against the dull ache at my temples. But a few seconds later, I yelped “Ow!” as my sister rolled right over me to get out of the bed. “Meanie.” I gave her a little kick as she walked away.

  And then I noticed something. “Hey, new nightie?”

  “Mama bought it yesterday!” Vivi piped up.

  At that, Jonas lifted his head. “Reeeeeeally?”

  “I hate you all,” Kira mumbled, heading out of the room. “Except Vivi.”

  With Kira gone, that left me next to Vivi. “This bed is big,” she said in her muppet voice. My niece crawled over to me and flopped her head onto my chest. “Which bed did you sleep in, Uncle Adam?”

  “Uh,” I stalled, trying to think through my headache. This was one of those moments when the truth was not a good option. “Hey, Vivi? Do you want to watch TV in your room?”

  “Yeah!”

  “I bet you can’t turn it on by yourself!”

  “Can too!” Vivi scrambled off the end of the bed and was out of the room in a nanosecond. A minute later I heard the television power up in the other bedroom.

  “Nice save.” Jonas chuckled from his side of the bed.

  “Yeah. Kira won’t like it.”

  “It’s better than the alternative.” Jonas dropped his voice to a whisper. “‘Vivi, can you say walk of shame?’”

  My face got hot. Vivi’s departure had left me alone in bed with Jonas. I checked the other man’s expression, and to my relief, his eyes were twinkling. “Your day is going downhill already,” I muttered. “Now it’s just you in bed with some strange guy.”

  “Oh, well…” the rock star yawned, stretching his arms overhead. “I’ve seen worse. Let’s find you that Advil.”

  He really was gorgeous, all lean muscle and golden hair. No wonder my sister couldn’t turn Jonas down. You’d have to be legally blind, and probably deaf as well. Seriously, though. The dude had better have a heart made of twenty-four karat gold if he planned to stick around Vivi and Kira. I’d be watching.

  Jonas grabbed his phone off the bedside table and wandered into the bathroom, returning a minute later with a pill bottle. “Heads up.” He tossed it onto the bed.

  “Thanks, man.”

  “De nada. Hey—is Ethan awake yet? He gets pissy when I wake him up with business.”

  I couldn’t quite meet his eyes when I answered the question. “Uh, yup.
”

  “Awesome.” Jonas hit a button on his phone, and turned back into the bathroom. “Morning, Ethan,” I heard him say before the door closed. “Party time is over. There’s a couple of things I need before we leave…”

  The bathroom door clicked shut, and I was alone. I lay there a moment, gathering my thoughts. More had happened to Kira, Vivi, and me in the last ten days then I could even process. And last night I’d broken my own dry spell in a big way, with enough alcohol and sex to make up for months of lost time.

  However.

  Reality was about to sink its ugly teeth into my (pleasantly sore) ass. In the next week, my surgery would be scheduled and then performed. As if that wasn’t miserable enough, I’d begin the process of adjusting to life as a one-nut wonder.

  With another groan, I rolled off the bed and went into the other bedroom. I sat on the bed next to Vivi, turned the TV down to a reasonable volume, and prayed for the pain reliever to kick in soon.

  * * *

  A little while later, the bathroom door opened. Kira had showered and changed, and was drying her hair. When the hair dryer stopped, I pulled my hungover self off the bed and went to stand in the doorway.

  Kira leaned toward the mirror, applying lip gloss with a tiny brush.

  “You never wear makeup,” I said automatically.

  She gave me a withering look in the mirror. “You never get wasted and stay out all night. But I wasn’t going to point that out.”

  Well, ouch. “I’m sorry. Can we have a truce?”

  Kira didn’t answer, either because she was upset, or because she didn’t want to ruin her top lip.

  “Last night… I shouldn’t have said that I didn’t trust him.”

  “But you don’t,” she said, meeting my eyes in the mirror.

  “I don’t know, Kira. It’s not my place to judge.” I rubbed my aching head. I should have known better than to have this conversation right now. Anything I said was going to come out all wrong.