Having You Is Never Enough

by E. L. Todd

  Having You Is Never Enough

  Book Four of The Forever and Ever Series

  E. L. Todd

  “Men want to be a woman’s first love.

  And women like to be a man’s last romance.”

  Oscar Wilde

  Chapter One

  Slade

  “Trinity is the biggest paradox I’ve ever heard,” Conrad said while he drank out of his red solo cup. “She never hangs out with anyone outside of us, but yet, she can throw a huge party.”

  People were crammed into the living room while they talked and laughed. Food was on the table and there was enough beer to quench the thirst of a German army. Her bedrooms were locked, protecting her privacy and belongings. Which was a good thing since I kept a lot of my thing over here. Come to think of it, I was never at my own apartment anymore.

  “It’s weird to think that people actually like her,” Roland said. He held his cup while he scanned the room. “And there are a lot of hot chicks here.”

  I knew I had to keep up pretenses. “Yeah…” I drank out of my cup then discreetly searched for Trinity. When I found her, I saw her talking to a group of people. She must have said something funny because everyone laughed. She wore dark jeans that were skin-tight, nude pumps, and a yellow blouse. Her jeans hugged her ass and made it irresistible.

  “See anyone you like?” Conrad said to me.

  Not really. “That brunette over there looks easy.” She did look easy. She was wearing shorts that practically showed her ass and tall heels. A pink shirt covered her chest but left her stomach bare. She had a nice body but she didn’t do anything for me.

  “Easy?” Roland laughed. “She looks like a prostitute.”

  “Same thing.” I put my hand in my pocket and eyed Trinity again.

  “Yo.” A tall guy wearing a black shirt patted Conrad on the shoulder. “Nice to you, man.”

  Conrad shook his hand. “Hey, Scotty. How’s it going?”

  “Good.” He nodded to Roland but didn’t say anything to me. “Hey, what’s the scoop with your sister?”

  My eyes immediately narrowed in annoyance.

  “What do you mean?” Conrad asked. He was totally clueless to the fact his older sister was smoking hot.

  “Does she got a boyfriend or anything?” Scott asked. “I was talking to her earlier and she was really cool.”

  Well, she is really cool. Obviously. I drank my beer and pretended not to care.

  “Boyfriend?” Conrad laughed. “Like anyone would want to date her.”

  “What’s wrong with her?” Scotty asked with a raised eyebrow.

  “Nothing,” Roland chimed in. “He just hates his sister.”

  “Hates her enough to come to her party?” he asked with a laugh.

  “Hot girls always show up,” Conrad explained.

  Scotty crossed his massive arms over his chest. He was thick and built, someone who obviously spent a lot of time doing weights. He was larger than me, and I didn’t look that knowledge. I was tone and thick, but I was on the lean side. I didn’t mind my appearance and I knew the ladies loved it, especially Trinity. But I still didn’t like this guy.

  “How’s the row team?” Roland asked.

  That explained the arms.

  “Good. We’re going to the championship this year,” Scott said. “I can feel it.”

  Roland nodded.

  “So…back to your sister.” Scott eyed Conrad. “Is she single?”

  I was liking this guy less and less.

  “Yeah, she’s single,” Conrad said. “But she’s also annoying, ugly, and won’t shut the hell up.”

  Scott laughed. “I didn’t get that impression at all.”

  “Give it a few more minutes,” Conrad said firmly.

  Scott clapped his shoulder. “I’m going for it. Any tips?”

  “She likes fashion,” Roland said.

  “And she’s into Voodoo,” I blurted.

  They all stopped and looked at me.

  “And she believes in dark magic and weird things.” I shook my head. “And she smells like ass. I’m pretty sure she only showers once a week. I’d stay clear of her. She has severe gingivitis.”

  Scott lifted an eyebrow. “She seemed cool…”

  “She’s not,” I said firmly. “I just saved you some time.”

  “She’s into voodoo?” Conrad whispered to Roland.

  Roland shrugged. “She always smells good to me.”

  “Well, thanks for the heads up.” Scott nodded then walked away, heading right to Trinity.

  Fucker.

  I wished I could intervene and just hook my arm around her waist. If I kissed her right in front of the crowd, everyone would know she was mine. But no, I had to stand back and pretend she didn’t mean anything to me.

  Roland and Conrad started talking like nothing had happened.

  “Tickets for the Flying Orangutans go on sale tomorrow,” Roland said. “You want to go?”

  “I’m down,” Conrad said. “Slade, you in?”

  I was watching Scotty make his move. He stopped in front of Trinity while he smiled. Then he said something to make her laugh. He was a foot taller than her, and he held himself like he was imbedded with muscle. When she laughed again, my stomach tightened.

  “Slade?” Roland asked.

  “Oh, sorry. What?” I turned back to them.

  “You okay, man?” Conrad eyed me like I might topple over and black out.

  “I’m good,” I barked.

  “So…are you down for the concert?” Conrad asked.

  “Yeah, sure.” I didn’t give a damn about a stupid concert.

  “Cool,” Roland said. “I’ll invite Cayson.”

  “I’m glad you guys are cool again,” Conrad said. “He was being a really big girl about it.”

  “You’re telling me.” Roland rolled his eyes.

  My eyes were glued to Trinity. Scott stepped closer to her, clearly engaging her in whatever conversation they were having. Why didn’t she just walk away? Why was she talking to him?

  “Who is that hunk of a man talking to Trinity?” Skye joined our circle, Cayson beside her.

  “Hunk of a man?” Cayson asked.

  “It’s an expression,” Skye said quickly.

  “It didn’t sound like one,” Cayson said darkly.

  “It’s a buddy of mine,” Conrad said. “He’s on the rowing team.”

  “That explains the arms,” Skye said. She eyed Trinity from her spot. “It looks like they’re really hitting it off…”

  “That guy is a loser,” I blurted.

  Skye looked at me. “Why?”

  “He’s just…not cool.” I drank my beer and brooded in silence.

  “I hope he asks her out,” Skye said. “She needs a good man in her life.”

  I am a good man.

  Trinity finally ended the conversation and headed toward us.

  Thank god that was over.

  Trinity joined our circle, holding a glass in her hand.

  Skye stared at her with a crazed look. “Why the hell are you talking to us?”

  “Geez, what did I do to piss you off?” Trinity asked.

  “No! I mean why did you l leave Scott?” she demanded. “He’s super cute, built, and wicked smart.”

  Cayson cleared his throat.

  “But he has nothing on my man.” Skye gave him a reassuring look before she turned back to Trinity. “You’ve had a crush on him forever.”

  She had? Now I wanted to kill him.

  Trinity shrugged. “I just don’t think he’s into me…”

  Conrad laughed. “He just came over here and asked if you were single.”

  “What did you say?” Trinity demanded.

>   “What do you think I said?” Conrad snapped. “Do you have a secret boyfriend I don’t know about?”

  “No,” Trinity and I said at the exact same time.

  No one questioned our in sync response.

  Skye eyed Scotty then turned her gaze back to Trinity. “He’s checking you out as we speak.”

  “He is?” Trinity didn’t look.

  “Now ditch us and spend time with him,” Skye demanded.

  Trinity tried to squirm for an excuse. “I…uh…”

  “Give me one good reason why you’re blowing him off,” Skye demanded.

  Trinity turned to me, the apology in her eye. We both knew we were in a rough situation. If she shrugged this guy off, it would be odd. But that didn’t mean I was happy about it. The jealous side of me came out, roaring and breathing fire.

  “You’re right,” Trinity said. “I’ll talk to him.”

  “Good.” Skye spun her around then gave her a shove.

  I clenched my jaw and squeezed my cup until it bent and broke. Beer spilled everywhere.

  “Dude, you’re getting shit all over my shoes.” Conrad stepped back and kicked the drops away.

  “Sorry.” I tossed the cup in the garbage and wiped my hands off.

  “Idiot,” Conrad muttered.

  I wasn’t listening to him. Instead, I stared at Trinity while Big Arms leaned close to her with a smile on his face.

  “We should go on a double date,” Skye said to Cayson.

  Judging the irritated look on Cayson’s face, he wasn’t interested. “Don’t you think you’re jumping the gun?”

  “I think it will be fun,” Skye argued.

  There would be double date. Shit, there wouldn’t be a single date either. Trinity could put on a show for the gang, but she better not touch him. Big arms or not, I would kick his ass if he laid a finger on her.

  Cayson crossed his arms and stared at Scotty. “What’s the big deal? He’s not even that good-looking…”

  Skye smirked at him then wrapped her arms around his neck. “Is Cayson getting jealous…?”

  “No,” he blurted. “I’m not jealous.”

  She chuckled. “He’s got nothing on you, babe. You’re the hottest guy in the room—in every room.”

  Cayson immediately dropped his sour mood. “Oh really?”

  “Really?” Skye whispered to him. Then she leaned in and kissed him gently.

  Roland rolled his eyes. “Just shoot me.”

  “Then finish me off,” Conrad said.

  I didn’t give a damn about Cayson and Skye. I turned my gaze back to Trinity but she was gone.

  Where the hell did she go?

  Chapter Two

  Trinity

  Scott leaned against the wall while he held his cup. His eyes were startling blue and he had a chiseled jaw, one that gave James Dean a run for his money. Ever since I saw him with my brother, the sparks flew. But he never showed interest in me—until now.

  “Graduation is coming. Nervous?” He sipped his glass while he studied my face.

  “Not really. Honestly, I’m excited to get my life started.”

  “That’s right. You and Conrad have it made.”

  I hated hearing that comment from people. It got really annoying. “No. I’m pursuing a career that has nothing to do with my bachelor’s.”

  “Which is?”

  “Fashion.”

  He nodded his head in approval. “You’d be perfect on the runway.”

  Why do you people keep making that assumption? “No, I want to be a designer.”

  “Oh, cool. You can model your own clothes.”

  The statement was flattering, although false. “Anyway, that’s what I’m pursuing. And my dad is understanding.”

  “Is Conrad going to take over the empire then?”

  “I don’t know…I don’t listen to him very often.”

  He chuckled and his eyes lightened. “You’re funny. I like a girl that can make me laugh. It’s the biggest turn on.”

  My cheeks blushed slightly. I was used to criticism but not praise. When Slade started to compliment me left and right, it was difficult to adjust. “Can I ask you something, Scott?”

  “Shoot.”

  “Why are you just noticing me now? I’ve known you for almost a year.”

  “No, I’ve always noticed you.” The humor was gone. “I was just on and off with this girl before…”

  Oh, now it made sense.

  “And your brother told me you were available so I decided to swoop in before someone else did.”

  These were words I longed to hear but now they meant nothing. The only person I enjoyed being around was Slade. He understood me in a way that transcended words and communication. Just a look was enough to tell him what I wanted and needed. It was relationship stronger than friendship, even stronger than love. But if you asked me to describe it or label it with words, I’d be speechless.

  “How about we go to dinner tomorrow night? If you’re free, of course.”

  How do I get out of this? If I rejected him, he would tell my brother, who in turn would tell Roland, who would in turn tell Skye…nothing in this family was a secret, I swear. In order to keep up pretenses, I knew I had to do it. After I saw him once, I could just blow him off and make an excuse. “Sure. That sounds nice.”

  He smiled in a genuine way. “Awesome. You like burgers?”

  “Duh.”

  He laughed. “I have a feeling this date is going to go well.” He pulled out his phone. “Can I score your digits?”

  I glanced at Slade. He looked like an angry bull about to charge Scott to the ground. I quickly turned back to Scott and gave him the number.

  “Excellent. I look forward to it.”

  “Yeah.”

  “I’ll pick you up at seven. And are you down for bowling?”

  Bowling? “Uh, yeah, that’s fun.”

  “Cool. We’ll have a good time.”

  I nodded, trying to figure out a way to get away from him.

  “You want to get out of here and get a cup of coffee or something?”

  What excuse did I have to say no? “Well, this is my house…I can’t just leave it.” That was pretty good.

  “Let’s run through the drive-thru at Starbucks then sit outside.”

  Damn. “Uh, sure.”

  “Cool.” He headed to the front door and I trailed behind him. When I glanced over my shoulder, Slade looked like he might burn down the house and trap Scotty inside it. I quickly shut the door behind me, unable to look at his face a moment longer.

  ***

  We sat on the bricks in front of my house facing the yard. The distant sound of the bass thudded from inside the house. It was nice to hear the sound of the crickets and passing cars.

  “You have parties pretty often.” He sipped his black coffee while one arm rested on his knee.

  “Yeah, I feel pressured to do it most of the time. I know a lot of my friends have apartments and it’s just difficult to cram everyone into a tight space. This will probably be the last one I’ll host.”

  “That’s too bad,” he said. “But you got to put yourself first.”

  “Yeah…”

  “Conrad mentioned you went on a few dates with some old guy?”

  I tried not to laugh. “He wasn’t old. He was twenty-seven. My brother always exaggerates things.”

  “Why didn’t it work out?”

  I shrugged. “He wasn’t my type.”

  He nudged my side gently and winked. “Am I your type?”

  My lips spread into a grin. “Well, I do like your arms.”

  He flexed one bicep. “It’s all that rowing.”

  “Impressive.” I nodded then looked across the lawn again.

  “What do you do to stay in great shape? Your body is a perfect ten.”

  His comment rubbed me the wrong way. Perhaps I was used to tame comments from Slade like ‘beautiful’ and ‘pretty’. He even made me feel beautiful without actually saying
it. Just a look or a touch told me what he was thinking. Crude comments no longer made me feel desirable. “I like running.”

  “How far do you run?”

  “Five miles a day.”

  “Damn.” His eyes widened. “That’s far.”

  “You should see the bottom of my feet. They’re torn up.”

  “Let me give you a foot rub.”

  Was that a joke? “My feet are ugly right now. You don’t want to see them right now.”

  “Come on, a beautiful girl like you deserves to be pampered.” He grabbed my legs and pulled them over his.

  “Whoa…okay.”

  He pulled my boots off then rubbed my foot through the sock.

  It felt good…really good…but it was still weird. “Thanks…”

  “No problem.” He rubbed the sole of my foot then the heel.

  Skye and Cayson stepped out of the house, followed by Slade.

  “You guys look cozy.” Skye was lighting up the lawn with her smile. I could tell she was thrilled by Scott’s interest in me. She cared more about my love life than I did.”

  “She’s got cute feet.” Scott continued to rub them.

  Slade’s eyes were darker than I’d ever seen them. His jaw was clenched tight and he looked like he might rip Scott’s face off.

  This was super awkward…

  “Let’s leave these guys alone.” Skye tugged on Cayson. “Let’s go home and I’ll give you a massage.”

  “I won’t say no to that.” Cayson held her hand in his own.

  Slade stayed put then a loud growl escaped his lips.

  Scott stopped then eyed Slade. “You alright, man…?”

  Without saying a word, Slade stormed off into the darkness.

  I sighed and felt my heart fall. I didn’t want to sit on these bricks while Scott rubbed my feet. I wanted to share my bed with Slade while we whispered to each other. I wanted to feel his warmth, his embrace. Keeping our relationship a secret was becoming painful and heartbreaking.

  I wasn’t sure if I could do it anymore.

  ***

  The next morning, Slade burst through the front door. If I didn’t know him, I would assume he came to my house to murder me in cold blood.

  I rose from the couch then cleared my throat. “I know this is—”