Found And Lost

by Deanna Hall

  “Granddaughter, I have a surprise for you. One I think you will be pleased with. Your old pack contacted me. They finally figure out where you girls had run off to.” He made it sound like it had been our idea. “I invited them to attend tonight’s celebration. I even offered to send Makala home with them since she is part of the tribe by marriage only.”

  Makala stayed where she was clinging to Bodie, but her eyes were on Charlie. I looked at the people standing before me. CJ, Peter, Adam, Dan, Donovan, Paul, Chase, Chief Blake, Charlie, Dan, then my eyes fell on Dakota.

  My mind was racing. I wanted to run to him. I wanted to throw myself in his arms; only Jackson was observing me closely. I didn’t know what to do. A vision of Dakota, lying in a pool of blood with his throat ripped out, came unbidden.

  Love and Loss

  Dakota

  Isaw Mia and a tall, dark-haired youth approach hand and hand. Given the reference in the letter to his father, I assumed he was Jackson’s son. I was surprised to see Makala attached to his other hand.

  Mia looked like a fire-haired Indian Warrior Princess. Her deep tan showed she’d spent a lot of time outside. Her hair was in a long braid, with three eagle feathers hanging from a beaded headband.

  Her dress was low cut and heavily beaded. The soft deerskin clung to every curve. She was barefoot. Except for her breasts being larger, you would never have known she had just given birth to twins.

  A large hunting knife hung on her hip, and a bow was slung over one shoulder next to a quiver of arrows and a papoose. A large hawk was sitting on the other shoulder.

  In the time we’d been apart, Mia had changed, matured, and was even more breathtaking than ever. I could feel a strength, determination, and fierceness in her spirit; I hadn’t felt before.

  The boy, because he was barely more than a boy, walking with her also had a knife strapped to his waist and was barefoot, as well. He was tall, tan, and muscular. His long dark hair was tied and hanging down his back. His spirit was dark, troubled, and dangerous, yet I could see a light shining through that darkness. I knew that light was because Mia’s spirit was joined to his.

  He stared at us with an expression I couldn’t read. His eyes were not that of a boy. They were the eyes of a wolf, ready to protect his mate at any cost. He was wild; his wolf was more a part of him than any of ours.

  My heart started beating faster when Mia looked up, meeting my eyes. I felt my wolves’ hackles rise. I tried not to let the anger and jealousy get the best of me. I had to remain calm. It was challenging. I had promised to control myself and let Chase take the lead. It was the hardest thing I’d ever done.

  I wanted to rip Mia away from that dark warrior and leave this place immediately. I tried to concentrate on just breathing. The thought flitted across my mind that she didn’t look like an unwilling captive. She looked like she belonged here. As the people parted for them, they looked at Mia almost reverently. What the hell was going on? I glanced over and saw CJ and Peter, who were both staring at Mia just as intently.

  We all saw Mia stop dead when she saw us. We also saw fear fill her eyes the minute she did. Breaking away from the boy’s embrace, Mia stalked towards us. “No! No, no, no! You can’t be here. You all need to leave; you don’t understand. You can’t be here. You need to go now!” She screamed the last.

  When the boy pulled her into his arms, I almost lost it. “Awensa, calm down. Father will not be pleased.” He whispered.

  Mia buried her face against his chest. “This can’t be happening.” I heard her whisper back. Jackson grabbed her arm, pulling her around to face him. One of the babies started screaming, and her hawk was ready to attack.

  I felt her calm him down with a push of her spirit. I suppose the hawk attacking Jackson wouldn’t have helped the situation; however, I half hoped it would.

  “Miakoda, you will cease this unseemly display immediately. Your tribe and pack are watching. You are my beta; act like it. These people are honored guests, here to celebrate this joyous occasion. My great-grandchildren bring much joy and prosperity to our nation. I invited our guests to help us celebrate. Everything will be fine as long as you remember who you are and where you belong.”

  Jackson’s threat was clear. If she didn’t do as he ordered, there would be trouble. Mia took a deep breath. Even though her fear, she glared at Jackson. “As you wish, Grandfather. If you would excuse me, I need to attend to Aalia. I will return shortly.” She pushed her way through the crowd. As soon as she was out, she ran for a horse. Somehow, I had to get away from the group and go after her.

  After her outburst and Jackson’s barely veiled threat, I was not surprised to see Mia flee. To my surprise, the boy did not go after her. Instead, he walked over to us, reaching out his arm to each of us. “I am Bodaway, Makala and Miakoda’s, um, husband.”

  We each grasped his arm firmly. I would have rather reach for his throat. Keeping tight control of my rage, I remained calm, sort of. “Funny, I thought I was Mia’s husband. Your so-called annulment isn’t even legal without my signature, so neither is your marriage.”

  Chase glared at me. “I’m sure this will all be straightened out soon, Dakota. Just have a little patience.” Jackson just laughed. Clearly, he was not the least intimidated by our presence.

  “Bodaway, please make our guest welcome while Miakoda attends to the baby. I will speak with Chase alone. Make yourselves at home. Young Chase, I believe this is the first time you have visited your ancestral home. It is suitable for you to know your heritage. Perhaps you will visit us more often.

  Your father was well respected among us before he left. I once thought he would be my son-in-law and take my place. Though the Great Spirit did not allow that to happen, he has brought Miakoda back to us. She has brought great hope to our people. Now please excuse us.”

  As Jackson and Chase walked away, Makala, no longer able to contain herself, threw herself into Charlie's arms, crying.

  I curtly asked, “Bodaway, don’t you think you should go after Mia? She was distraught and afraid. Or is fear what you use to control her.”

  Bodaway replied calmly, “Miakoda does not fear me. Nor is it my comfort she needs at this time. Right now, the pain in her spirit I cannot take away. She is afraid for your life, as she has been these many months.

  She is right to be. My father has made it plain to her if she does not stay among us as my wife; you will be killed. She knows from past experience; Father does not make idol threats.”

  “I can take care of myself. Mia didn’t have to sacrifice herself for me. Though it seems she has adjusted to that sacrifice well enough.” I knew my voice sounded bitter. I couldn’t help it.

  “Mia did what was required to keep those she loved safe. Had she, not Makala would have been given to the braves to do with as they pleased, and you would be dead. It was not her fault our spirits recognized each other.

  Never once did she stop grieving your loss. Mia made it clear if she ever found a way she could return to you without endangering you, Makala and now the babies, she would. She knows my father and his braves. She also knows none of you have been trained from birth to be warriors as we have.

  Even you, Dakota, who grew up on a reservation, are soft compared to us. I do not say that as an insult, just a fact. However, I have promised Miakoda I will protect you all, and I will, with my life if necessary. For what it is worth, I was never a part of my father’s plans for Miakodah. I only fought to claim her and Makala to keep them from others who would have treated them cruelly. Before you go after Mia, you might want to meet your son.”

  Bodaway pulled the papoose around, lifting the baby out. He was wide awake and alert even at this young age. As Bodaway handed me, my son, my anger vanished. I held him gingerly. He fit in one hand. “He’s so tiny. Shouldn’t he be in a hospital?”

  “Perhaps. My father would not allow it. He was afraid Mia would be recognized. Our spirits have given them strength, and they thrive.”

  “Did she even re
ceive medical attention?” I asked, starting to get angry again.

  “I regret having to say no. They were born in a field by my hands on my name day. Mia has not had an easy time here. Remarkably, she has never complained. The only tears she let fall were when she thought no one knew of her misery. I did my best to fill her emptiness.”

  “I’ll just bet you did. Did you take care of Makala as well as you did, Mia?”

  Makala spoke up, “It wasn’t like that, Kotah. Bodie just protected me; he never, I mean, not with me. He took care of us.” She tried to explain.

  “So, he only raped Mia,” I growled.

  Bodie flinched, looking away. “I regretted having to make Mia my wife. She forgave me. I will not insult you by pretending I do not love Mia. Though she has grown to care for me, her heart remains yours.”

  The baby started to fuss. I held him closer, bouncing him in my arm. “It’s ok little man. Daddy’s here now. Everything is going to be fine.” I expected a rebuttable.

  Instead, Bodie said, “You make take my horse and go after Mia if you wish. Jackson will cause you no harm while you are a guest here. I will care for your son and take the rest of your people to get some refreshments.”

  I looked at Bodaway like he was crazy. CJ and Peter were looking at him the same way. “You’d let me take your horse and go after my wife?”

  “Miakoda is my wife here though it was not her choice. I always knew she was not to be mine forever. I know you are a spirit walker, Dakota Windsong, your reputation is well known among the tribes. It is your touch, Mia needs, not mine. Go to her, soothe her as you do other wild things. Do not judge her too harshly. She believed she was doing the right thing.”

  I knew then Bodaway was no boy. Because of his own childhood traumas, in some ways, he knew Mia better than any of us did. Then again, she’d already been his longer than she’d been mine.

  I followed Mia’s tracks and found her sitting on a bank by a pond, close to the top of a nearby mountain. She was dangling her feet in the water, holding the baby in her arms, while otters played at her feet. Her hawk was perched on her shoulder.

  Mia giggled when one of the otters splashed her. “See Aalia. They won’t hurt you. I’ll make sure no one ever hurts you. Especially Grandfather. When you grow up, all the wild things will love you as your father, and I do.” I stood in the tree line, watching her, mesmerized. These wild creatures accepted her as one of their own.

  Mia called out in a trembling voice, “Do you hate me for what I’ve done?” Though I approached slowly, the otters swam off. When I sat down next to her, the hawk lunged. I spoke to it in a calming voice, before reaching out my arm. It stepped on, climbing up to my shoulder.

  “His name is Fury. He protects our children.”

  “Why would you think I would hate you?” I asked calmly.

  Mia shrugged. “Why wouldn’t you? I am sharing another man's bed and bore his child. I bonded to him and care for him. I love him. Not the way I love you, but I do love him. I tried not to. I hate myself for that and for betraying you.”

  “I don’t understand all this, Mia, but I love you. I have been living in hell since we found you were missing. Could you at least explain what happened?”

  Mia did, starting with how they were brought here and finishing with how Bodaway had saved her and Makala from the others. “He kept us safe all these months. He’s been kind and has provided for us. I don’t know why my spirit recognized him; it just did.

  I didn’t think I would ever see you again, so I stopped fighting it. I let myself find some comfort in Bodie’s arms. I hated myself every time I did. I’m sorrier than you’ll ever know for being weak. It would have been better if I’d let Nashoba rape me every night.”

  “Mia, I won’t say I’m happy about your relationship with Bodie, though I’m glad you had him to protect you. I think your spirit recognized him because of what you are. I’m sure the Great Spirit sent him to you to protect you from Jackson. His spirit is very intense and dangerous, but it is clear he loves you.”

  “Bodie is a kind, sweet boy with the heart of a musician who has been forced, against his nature, to be a warrior. He was abused, beaten, and forced to fight, often to the death by my grandfather. It has taken a great toll on him, yet he smiles now. Sometimes he even laughs.” Mia’s expression softened. Love shown in her eyes as she spoke of Bodie.

  I felt a pang of jealously. Was her bond to her dark, broken warrior stronger than the love we shared? “I don’t love him more than you, Dakota. You are my passion. My light in the darkness. My strength, my very heart. I couldn’t love anyone the way I love you.”

  Not knowing how to respond to her declaration, I lifted her eagle feathers, admiring them. “They’re perfect. Did Bodaway get them for you?”

  “No, I got them myself. Bodie wasn’t pleased with me at the time. He was proud after.”

  I was impressed. I almost broke my neck getting mine. “So am I, that’s quite an accomplishment.” I felt how pleased Mia was by my praise.

  “How did you find out where I was?” Mia asked.

  “We received a picture of you and Makala with the babies. I assume it was from Bodie. In his letter, he called you Miakoda. Between the fact that it’s your Indian name and Chase recognizing the setting from the picture, we put two and two together. After that, it was easy to figure out where you were.

  Chase contacted Jackson. He didn’t deny you were here. Instead, he invited us to this celebration. So we can go home now, right. He can’t stop you without bringing the Feds down on the res.”

  Mia's eyes filled with fear. “I can’t leave Dakota.”

  “Mia, it’s over; we already informed the Feds. They said if we had any trouble getting you away, they would intervene. Or is it that you don’t want to leave because of Bodie?”

  Tears started streaming down Mia’s cheeks. “Do you really think I don’t want to come home with you. That’s all I’ve dreamed about all these months. Jackson will never let me leave. As long as he’s alive, you’re in danger, as is Makala, the babies, anyone he knows I love.”

  “We’ll be safe, Mia. He wouldn’t dare attack us with all the publicity this will get.”

  Mia was sobbing now, and the baby started to cry with her. Putting the small baby to her shoulder, Mia bounced her gently. “He waited twenty years to find my parents, Dakota. Twenty years. My parents thought he’d given up on them. They thought they were safe.

  Then he ripped my father’s throat out in his sleep. He looked right at me when he killed my mother, his own daughter, while she pleaded with him for my life. You have to believe me when I tell you, as long as he lives, we’ll never be safe.”

  Hearing the raw terror in Mia’s voice and seeing it in her spirit, I knew exactly why she had sacrificed herself to protect me. Jackson had terrorized her in a way that gave him power over her. “Mia, I know you fear him. You have every right to, except I can’t let you go again. Please don’t make me.”

  Now I was crying. Mia put her arm around my neck, pulling my forehead to hers. “I love you, Dakota. I can’t lose you again, either. I know how to fix this. I’ve been thinking about what I needed to do ever since the babies were born. I can’t let Jackson ruin their lives like he did Bodie’s and mine. I wasn’t brave enough before the babies were born. I am now. It will be alright. We’ll all be alright.”

  Mia’s lips found mine. For a few minutes all our worries disappeared as the familiar fire tore through us. Even the baby was content. When the kiss ended, Mia got up, putting the baby back in her papoose. “We should go back; it’s getting late. We’re already late for the festivities. Jackson will not be pleased.”

  As she stood, Mia swayed on her feet. I caught her before she fell. “Are you alright? You feel warm, even for a werewolf.”

  “I’m fine. I’m just tired and got up too fast.”

  As she turned to walk away, I grasped her hand. “Mia, I’m sorry you’re afraid and upset, but I’m not sorry we came for you.
I love you. I can’t live without you.”

  Mia threw herself in my arms. “Don’t you get it, Dakota. I can’t lose you. I’ve been so terrified. Visions of you laying in a pool of blood like my father has haunted my dreams like an omen, every night. I thought there was no other way. I can’t live without you either. I got by here because I knew you were safe. Now that you’re here, I can’t let you go again. I’m not strong enough to. The only choice left is to stop Jackson.”

  After that, we mounted up and rode down the mountain in silence. I didn’t know how to comfort Mia’s fears. I felt helpless. I just knew I would never leave here without her, even if I had to kill Jackson myself.

  Halfway down the mountain, Mia signaled me to be quiet. She slipped off her horse, creeping into the woods. I followed silently. Knocking an arrow, she drew and fired it at a large buck. She hit him dead on in the heart, dropping him instantly. “There’s our contribution to the feast. Help me drag it to the horse.”

  “Wow, nice shot. When did you learn to do that?” I asked.

  “Bodie taught me. The people here are destitute. They can always use more food. We hunt for those that can’t.” I was beginning to hate and admire Bodie. We put the buck across my horse’s flank before continuing back to the ceremonial grounds.

  Once we returned, Mia talked with everyone, giving them all hugs and kisses. She apologized for her reaction earlier. “Donnie, what are you doing here? Didn’t they tell you how dangerous this would be?” Mia asked.

  “What kind of brother would I be if I didn’t make sure they brought you home safe.”

  Mia smiled at him, pulling him into a hug. “I love you, little brother.”

  Donnie grinned with pride. “I love you too, big sister.”

  Mia explained why she was worried about everyone’s safety. She told them of the awful things her grandfather had done. Even what had happened to Bodie’s parents. “Chase, you know better than any of them what Jackson is capable of. You know he won’t let me leave. By coming here, you let him know exactly who to target. If I leave, none of you would ever be safe again. But I have a plan. You all just have to trust that I know what I’m doing and not interfere.”