Capturing Forever

by Erin Dutton

  Jacqueline flushed and looked away guiltily. Casey hadn’t thought Jacqueline had been celibate all this time. But she got an uncomfortable feeling in her stomach when she thought about Jacqueline behaving as Sean had implied she did. Part of her hated that Jacqueline wasn’t still the sweet, somewhat shy woman who had first taken her to dinner twenty-one years ago.

  At that moment, Jacqueline’s phone vibrated and lit up with a text notification. Since she’d left it on the coffee table earlier, she would have to stretch across Casey to get it. Automatically, Casey grabbed it and passed it to her. She hadn’t meant to look at the screen, but her eyes fell there almost on their own. She saw the name “Marti” and the words “last night” before Jacqueline pulled it away.

  Jacqueline unlocked the screen, read it, then tucked it in her pocket.

  “Marti?” Casey asked before she could stop herself.

  “A friend in Atlanta.”

  “A friend you saw last night?”

  Jacqueline didn’t answer.

  “Did you have plans to see her before or after you called and asked me to check on Teddy because you couldn’t make it home?” She didn’t want to know. She didn’t want to hear about what Jacqueline had been doing while Nina was leaving Casey because she didn’t want to share her with Teddy.

  “It’s not what you think—”

  “Before or after?” Casey repeated, her words as tight as the knot in her throat.

  “Before.”

  “Seriously?” She shot off the couch, unable to watch the guilt overtaking every feature of Jacqueline’s beautiful face.

  “Casey, I can explain.”

  “I’d love to hear it.” It seemed like someone else spewed the words. Surely not Casey. Because she most definitely did not want to hear whatever Jacqueline was about to say. “I can’t wait to find out how you justify this one to yourself.”

  “I—um—I actually—”

  “Yes?”

  “Shit. Give me a minute.”

  “Sure. You need some time to come up with a suitable lie?”

  “No, I—”

  “I don’t even want to know.” Casey grabbed her purse and wrenched open the front door. As she left, she muttered, “Here I was thinking you’d changed. I’m such an idiot. And you’re the same selfish—”

  “I’m selfish?” Jacqueline followed her out of the house, but Casey ignored her, intent only on getting to her car and leaving. “I’m selfish for wanting to take care of my family? For trying to be everything to everyone?”

  Casey spun around and came face-to-face with Jacqueline. “Just how exactly does you screwing some woman while I’m here looking after your father add up to you taking care of your family?”

  Jacqueline gasped and fell back a step, as if Casey had actually struck her.

  “I can’t—” Casey turned back and quickly covered the distance to her car. “I can’t do this now.”

  “Casey.” Jacqueline took a step toward her, but when Casey paused in the open door to her car, she froze.

  “I’ll check on him next week while you’re gone because I said I would. But after that, you’re on your own.”

  Chapter Ten

  “This was a wasted trip,” Jacqueline muttered as she rested her elbow on the table in front of her and braced her forehead against her palm. She’d been in Knoxville for two days and had determined that she could have completed this investigation over the phone.

  She’d arrived in town late Sunday night and interviewed Lena Blackstone Monday morning. Lena alleged that she was passed up for promotions because she was female. After taking her statement, Jacqueline talked to Lena’s manager as well as the center’s hiring manager, who didn’t even recall Lena having applied for an open promotional position.

  Jacqueline logged into the applicant tracking system and pulled the postings for the two promotions she said she’d put in. Lena’s name didn’t appear on either list. She had to dig a little further to find the issue.

  In both cases, preference was given to internal applicants who applied by a specified purge date. If they had a shortage of qualified existing employees, only then would they consider external applicants. In one case, Lena had mistakenly applied as an external applicant, and because they had a number of good internal employees to consider, they didn’t add any of the external applications. In the second, she’d applied internally, but after the expiration date, so her paperwork wasn’t processed. Not only had she not been purposely discriminated against, but she hadn’t actually been in contention for either job through her own fault.

  Her next interview with Lena didn’t go smoothly. Lena insisted she’d received no direction from her superiors about how to put in for the jobs, probably because she was a woman and they didn’t want her to get the promotion. Jacqueline gave her the printouts of the job postings that specified which systems to apply through. None of the other applicants had had trouble following the directions.

  After determining Lena’s claim was unfounded, Jacqueline just needed to complete and submit her final report. She sat back in her chair, opened the laptop in front of her, and began summarizing the course of her investigation over the past two days.

  She couldn’t wait to finish and head home, though what she faced there wouldn’t be much easier. True to her word, Casey had continued to check on her father for the past two days. She hadn’t answered any of Jacqueline’s calls since their argument last week. But, since Monday, after Jacqueline had hung up without leaving a voice mail, she’d received a text from Casey with an update on her father. If he knew they’d argued, he hadn’t brought it up in any of her phone conversations with him. The one time she’d heard Casey in the background and asked to speak to her, he’d haltingly told her that Casey had just stepped out of the room, then changed the subject. She was too proud to beg him to convince her to get on the phone, so she’d let it go.

  *

  “Do you think you’ll spend more than a few days at home any time soon?” Kendra asked as she slid into the coffee shop booth across from Jacqueline.

  “I sure as hell hope so. I’m running on fumes here.” Jacqueline took a sip of her coffee. “I got back from Knoxville a couple of hours ago and have to go into the office this afternoon. But tomorrow, I’m taking a day to work from home. Dad has a follow-up with his doctor.”

  “It’s Friday. Why not?”

  “Exactly.”

  “Here. You look skinny. I got you a muffin.” Kendra slid a plate covered with a huge chocolate-chip muffin across the table.

  “I’m good. Thanks.”

  “Fine. I got it for me.” She pulled it halfway back to her. “But as my maid of honor, you’re obligated to eat half my calories so I’ll still fit in my dress.”

  “I’m your maid of honor?” Jacqueline broke a piece off the top. “Oh, it’s still warm.”

  “Of course you are. You’re the only woman I’ve ever lived with that I didn’t want to kill on a regular basis.”

  “You did have some nightmare roommates after me.”

  “Yes, but even after you dumped me to room with Casey junior year and left me with an endless string of crazies, here I am still asking you to stand up with me at my wedding.”

  “Because you’re the better person.” Jacqueline raised her coffee in a mock salute.

  “Speaking of Casey.”

  “We weren’t.”

  “She called me.”

  Jacqueline froze with her cup halfway to her mouth. “I assumed you two still spoke.” She paused and then added, “What did she say?”

  “Nothing about you. Not even after I dropped your name in conversation. She only actively avoids talking about you when she’s mad. What happened?”

  “You enjoy this, don’t you? Being in the middle, calling yourself Switzerland all the time. But I think you get a kick out of listening to us both and knowing even more about what’s going on than either of us does.”

  “Fine. Don’t tell me what happened. Have you stopp
ed to consider why, after eight years, there’s still something for me to be in the middle of? You’re lesbians. Aren’t you supposed to be best friends after, like, a year and a half?”

  “You’re hilarious.” Jacqueline tore off another piece of muffin and shoved it in her mouth.

  “Are you two going to be able to handle being involved in my wedding together?”

  “Of course. I’ve actually seen more of her in the past month than I have in years. We’ll be fine.” She wasn’t certain where they stood, but the wedding was three months away. If all else failed, she’d stick to the other side of the room. “Oh, I’m throwing you a shower. I think it’s one of my official duties.”

  “Do people even do that anymore?”

  “I don’t know. But we will.”

  “I’m not some twenty-something buying my first house with my new husband. Aren’t showers only for the first marriage?”

  “Okay. Call it an engagement party.”

  “You know what I’d really like?”

  “What’s that?”

  “Remember the poker parties we used to have?”

  Jacqueline laughed. “Sure. I met Casey at one of them. I haven’t played poker in years.”

  “Brush up on your Texas Hold ’Em, my friend. I expect you to help me clean out the guests like we used to.”

  *

  “Teddy, I brought lunch,” Casey called as she opened his front door. She stopped quickly when she entered the living room. Jacqueline sat on the couch with her open laptop resting on her thighs. Fatigue dulled Jacqueline’s eyes, and her hair was messed up like she’d had her hands in it all morning. Casey couldn’t back out of the room now, and she couldn’t give in to her sudden urge to go to her, so instead she offered a somewhat stilted greeting. “I didn’t know you were here.”

  “I took Dad to the doctor this morning. I’m working from here for the afternoon. I should have texted and let you know you didn’t need to come today.”

  “Well, I’m here now and I have enough food for three, so we may as well eat.” She forced herself into the kitchen, not in the mood for a confrontation. Maybe they could keep things polite through lunch, and then she could escape unscathed. “Where’s Teddy?”

  “On the back patio, reading the paper.”

  “Good. It’s a gorgeous fall day. You should join him. You look like you could use some fresh air.”

  “I’ve got a million things to do this afternoon if I want to have any semblance of a weekend,” Jacqueline said, propped against the doorframe between the kitchen and living room.

  “Well, you’ve already put your laptop aside. And now you’re halfway to the patio. I apparently brought enough fried chicken to feed an army.” She gestured to the bucket of chicken she’d picked up on her way back from her morning shoot. “So let’s go out and have a picnic with Teddy.” She looked up and caught Jacqueline staring at her with a mix of fondness and confusion. “What?”

  “Nothing.” Jacqueline looked away. “You’re very good at taking care of all of us.” When she glanced back up, her expression grew serious.

  “Well.” Casey broke eye contact first this time. The mood in the room suddenly felt a bit too domestic. She looked down at the three plates she’d been filling with food. “How was his appointment?”

  Jacqueline didn’t answer right away, and Casey worried she wouldn’t go with the subject change. But then she straightened and came farther into the room. “I think he’s finally being honest with his doctor.”

  “That’s good.”

  “He tells me he’s fine. But once the doctor called him out on his shit, he admitted to back and leg pain. The doc prescribed some anti-inflammatories and pain pills.”

  “If you leave them on the counter, I’ll make sure he takes them when I’m here.” Casey spoke without thinking, then realized she’d told Jacqueline she wouldn’t be coming anymore after this week. She’d just given Jacqueline an opening to bring up their recent argument.

  “The doc also thinks he’s depressed.” Though Jacqueline didn’t stray from the previous topic, her tone became more tentative.

  Casey nodded.

  “You’re not surprised.”

  “Not really. He hasn’t been the same since your mom died. But lately, he seems more—I don’t know—lonely, maybe.”

  “I’ve tried suggesting activities for him. But he seems content to sit in that house and let me bring everything to him.”

  “What did the doctor suggest?”

  “He doesn’t want to put him on medication just yet. He says he can suggest a therapist with experience with the elderly.”

  “God, it’s so weird thinking of your dad as elderly.” He’d been in his mid-forties when they’d first started dating. She’d been completely intimidated the first time Jacqueline had introduced her. He’d just returned home from a construction site covered in grease from his work as a heavy-machinery mechanic. He’d greeted her gruffly and barely spoke to her at dinner, leaving Jacqueline’s mother to do the entertaining. She hadn’t known at the time that she was the first girl Jacqueline had brought home to meet them. “I can’t imagine him willingly seeing a therapist.”

  “In the absence of drugs and therapy, he said, as a first step, we should get him out and active. He’s lost too much weight and needs to eat better. And more importantly, poor nutrition can lead to bone loss and other health issues.”

  “Okay. So,” she looked down at the fried chicken, potatoes, and gravy, “after this meal, healthy cooking, then. And we have to entice him out of the house.”

  “I thought you were done after this week,” Jacqueline said sarcastically.

  “I’m not doing it for you.” Just like that, the tension was back between them. She picked up her and Teddy’s plates and headed for the patio.

  The screened patio had always been Teddy’s favorite place to unwind. He and his wife had spent their evenings drinking their after-dinner decaf in the side-by-side lounge chairs that occupied one side of the area. Opposite the loungers, a round patio table and four chairs were perfectly placed to feel the light midday breeze.

  “How did you know I wanted fried chicken?” Teddy opened his napkin and laid it across his lap.

  “You mentioned it twice last week, and we didn’t have it. I took a chance that you were still in the mood.”

  “Enjoy it. After this it’s all grilled chicken and leafy greens,” Jacqueline said as she joined them on the patio. She took the chair across from Casey.

  Teddy waved a drumstick at her. “Are you doing the cooking?”

  “I can follow a recipe.” Jacqueline gave Casey a stern look, warning her not to argue.

  Teddy didn’t seem convinced. He looked at Casey and said, “Maybe you could bring over a pot of that potato-and-kale soup you make. We could live on it for a couple of days.”

  “Hey, I’ll be in town all week. And I should be able to get home for dinner. So I got it covered.”

  Teddy smiled as if he’d meant to rile Jacqueline up. “Maybe soup for lunch.”

  “I think you may be getting spoiled by all of this attention, Dad.” Jacqueline winked at Casey, then gave her an apologetic look.

  Casey turned her attention to her plate. She couldn’t deny the way her stomach had fluttered in reaction to the wink, but then again, being the focus of Jacqueline’s attention had always affected her that way. Likely, Jacqueline had winked out of habit in the same way that she reacted automatically.

  “I have back-to-back shoots on Monday. But I can come for lunch on Tuesday.” She’d told Jacqueline she was done helping out. But she’d enjoyed spending time with Teddy these past few weeks. And why should he have to sit here alone all day just so she could spite Jacqueline?

  “Soup, then?”

  “Let’s make a deal, Teddy. I’ll bring soup, if you’ll go for a walk around the block with me before lunch.”

  “You’d make an old man walk for his lunch?”

  She laughed. “Yes.”

&n
bsp; “To the corner and back.”

  Casey pretended to consult Jacqueline, who gave a small nod. “Deal.”

  Casey ate the rest of her lunch quietly, listening to Teddy and Jacqueline talk about the plight of Teddy’s second cousin from Arizona who had just been diagnosed with prostate cancer. Casey had never met the cousin, but the conversation led to a roll call of other distant family members that neither had seen nor thought about in years. Jacqueline recalled a reunion that had brought a good number of them together when she was a teenager, Teddy remarking that since then, no one in the family had taken the initiative to organize such an event.

  Once they’d finished lunch, Jacqueline gathered up their dishes and went to the kitchen.

  “I’m going to head home.” Casey bent and gave Teddy a half hug, urging him back to his seat when he tried to stand to see her off. She kissed his cheek. “I know my way out.”

  He grabbed her hand. “Don’t let her chase you away. You’re welcome here.”

  She teared up immediately, then flushed with embarrassment. His love and acceptance, so freely given, made her uncharacteristically emotional. “Take care. Call me if you need anything. Anytime, okay?” She sniffed and swiped at her eyes as she entered the house.

  Chapter Eleven

  Jacqueline had just finished packing up the leftover food, when Casey hurried through the kitchen with her head down. She was surprised when Casey didn’t stop or speak, and she didn’t recover until Casey was well through the room.

  “Hey.” She caught up to Casey near the front door. But she didn’t really know what she’d intended to say when Casey turned with her purse in her hand. “Do you want to take the rest of the food home?”

  “No. Keep it here. You two will eat it sooner than I will.” Casey turned back toward the door.

  “Can we talk?” Why did everything she said sound like she’d blurted it out?

  “About?” Casey looked frustrated.

  “Okay. You were right. I was a selfish ass.” Jacqueline braced one arm on the couch, needing some kind of anchor to keep her from crossing to Casey. “I knew I should have come home. But lately, between Dad and work, I don’t have—I just needed—”