Think Twice

by Stephanie Rose

  “I was on my way here when my mom called. Then my dad grabbed the phone, and they both wouldn’t let me go.” His baby blues rolled.

  A chuckle fell from my lips, relaxing me for a moment. “They must miss you. Weren’t they just here a couple of days ago?”

  Jack hopped to a table and rested his crutches on the edge before pulling out my chair. I stumbled a moment as my heart squeezed in my chest. It wasn’t the first time someone had pulled my chair out for me, but the effort I knew he had to put forward to do it warmed my insides.

  “They called for information on my sister. They said she’s acting strange and something’s up.” He slid into the seat next to me, his gaze dropping to the table as he shrugged. “She was supposed to go away to school in San Diego and couldn’t wait to go. It’s all we heard for months. Now, she’s not going.”

  “Not going? Not going to school?”

  “No,” he sighed. “She’s still going. She’s enrolled in a school in Manhattan. The very same one my dad tried to convince her to attend when she first brought up leaving. Now, for no reason, she’s changed her mind and is staying. Plus, she’s never home anymore. She works with my mom in a school, teaching art to kids—she’s an artist like I told you. She’s always out with friends but doesn’t give any explanation as to where. She’s eighteen, so they don’t feel like they can press her.” He cupped his forehead and groaned. “It was a long conversation of going around in circles.”

  “So they called you so—”

  “I could get it out of her? Yep.” I laughed at his defeated nod.

  “Do you think she maybe … has a boyfriend?”

  He cocked his head from side to side. “I thought of that, and if she does, I get why she’s hiding it. My dad still thinks of her as a kid and would give whoever it was a hard time. But she’d say something by now.” He dropped his head to his hands and pinched his nose. “I hope that’s all it is. I didn’t let on, but I’m a little worried, too.”

  A smile creeped over my lips at Jack’s knitted brow. He was sexy all over, but the most attractive part of him was always how nice he was. Even when I’d first known him, Jack Taylor was simply a genuinely good guy. After marrying and being burned by an awful man, witnessing Jack’s pure sincerity and concern for his sister got me right in the chest.

  “You’re a good big brother.” I nudged his arm and fought not to swoon at his shy smile.

  “She’s a pain in the ass, but … I’d kill for my baby sister,” he whispered on a shrug. “But she’s smart and can take care of herself, and if something was really wrong, she’d tell me. When she visits and I can look her in the eye, I’ll get it out of her then.” His eyes darted to mine, his crystal blue orbs now shining with a little mirth.

  “You sound like Kyle.” I laughed, thinking of his almost daily calls in the almost year since the divorce. “I guess you never stop being the big brother, right?”

  “No, probably not. But she looks out for me, too.” His mouth flattened before he took in a long breath. “After my surgery, my … my girlfriend broke up with me.”

  “That’s awful, Jack. I’m sorry. Right after surgery she did that?”

  “She did it in the recovery room.” He let out a humorless laugh as my jaw dropped.

  “Recovery room? What kind of a person does that?”

  “Marina was always on the selfish side. But I guess not knowing what my future was, that she might have to actually take care of me and couldn’t be a firefighter’s girlfriend anymore, she couldn’t handle it. When I went home, I guess she had second thoughts and tried to see me.”

  My jaw dropped. “That’s nerve. What did she say?”

  A slow grin split his mouth. “My sister wouldn’t let her past the doorway. PJ ripped her a new one so badly Marina didn’t even get a chance to respond. I pretended I didn’t hear. I was in a … bad headspace at the time. But hearing that little pip-squeak yell at my ex-girlfriend and threaten to beat the shit out of her almost made me laugh.”

  “Good. I hope PJ punched her, too.”

  Jack’s gaze fell to the table as he shrugged. “I … actually don’t blame Marina that much. No one knew what my prognosis was at the time. If I had any residual nerve damage. It was a lot to —”

  “That’s bullshit, Jack. If you love someone, all that doesn’t matter. She should’ve been grateful that you were alive and never left your side. It’s what I would have done.”

  His head whipped around, his eyebrows raised. Shit, where the hell did that come from?

  “I mean … I …” I stammered, unsure of how the hell to backtrack from that humiliating slip of the tongue. “She shouldn’t have had to think about whether or not she wanted to stick by you. You’re a great guy, Jack. No matter what kind of injury you had or what the future held, she should have realized being with you was a privilege, not an obligation.”

  How deep could I dig this hole? Apparently, so deep I couldn’t see the surface anymore.

  Jack’s lips twisted as if he was holding back a smile. I sucked in a shaky breath in a final attempt to clean up my word vomit.

  “What I was trying to say was …” I trailed off when Jack picked up my hand and pressed a light, lingering kiss on my wrist. The air stilled in my lungs as my gaze stumbled to his, and this time, my mouth forgot to form any words.

  “I know what you meant. And thank you.” Our fingers laced together, and I should have yanked my hand away. This tiny gesture shifted everything between us. The banter during his sessions and the long conversations after I could reason away as being friendly. This was more than only friendly. I still felt Jack’s lips on my skin. They were soft and wet, the stubble around his lips scraping my skin as he pulled away. I wondered how they tasted, how the bristles around his mouth would feel against my lips if he kissed me.

  At the end of the day, he was my patient, and I was his therapist. The closeness we shared was inappropriate and just plain wrong. I was broken like Jack, but my injuries couldn’t be fixed. Leading him on in his weakened state caused a rush of shame to filter through me. I was a fraud on more levels than I could count.

  The clink of coins in the vending machine behind us made us both jump and pull apart.

  “Oh, hey.” Leanne grimaced when our gazes shot in her direction. “I didn’t realize anyone was still here, and I didn’t want to … interrupt.”

  “You weren’t.” I popped out of my chair so fast the metal of the chair legs screeched on the tile. “I was just stopping in for a candy run before I went home. I’ll walk out with you.”

  I grabbed my things in a mad rush before I turned to Jack. “See you in the morning.” I forced a tight smile. He crossed his arms and leaned back, his shoulders shaking with a laugh. Instead of being offended by my desperate escape, he was amused.

  “Yes, ma’am. But, you can’t call it a candy run if you didn’t buy any candy. I’ll take that Kit Kat tomorrow.” He winked, and either the embarrassment or spark from earlier caused my cheeks to heat.

  “Right.” Tearing my eyes from his and straightening, I rushed out to meet Leanne and head to the parking lot.

  “Let me explain,” I pleaded, my words sounding desperate and choppy. “It wasn’t what it looked like.”

  She laughed and shook her head. “Danielle, what I saw will stay between us. I promise.” She came toward me and tilted her head. “But what it looked like was exactly what it was. He’s only here for a few more weeks, right? What’s the harm? I wouldn’t do anything here,” she whispered. “But after he’s discharged …” She shrugged. “That’s no one’s business but yours.”

  I nodded a wordless goodbye before I opened my car door and started the engine.

  My head fell back as I shut my eyes. What’s the harm? What a loaded question that was.

  I could’ve pinpointed my hesitation on ethics, but the real reason was that when Jack returned to his old life—whole, I knew I’d have no place in it.

  15

  Jack


  “Ready?” Danielle strode up to where I lay on the therapy table and jerked her head to the door.

  I rolled up on the table and leaned back on my elbows, squinting at her in confusion.

  “Don’t we always start here?” I motioned to my ankles and the resistance band I swiped to start on my leg raises early.

  “We do.” She nodded with an adorable slant of a smile. “But I know you probably got here early and are on what, your fourth set? Let’s take a walk outside.”

  “Outside?” My brow pinched. “No weights or balance reps?”

  She let out a long sigh with a slow shake of her head. “I think for this one session, we can skip it for some fresh air.” She crooked her finger. “Get up. And leave one of the crutches.”

  “Wait,” I called out before I caught her arm. “You want me to go outside with no crutches?”

  “No, just one crutch. Come on, Taylor, we only have an hour. Tick-tock.” She smiled as she tapped her foot.

  I shrugged and hopped off the table, grabbing only one crutch and stilling for a moment. All I had to do was put one foot in front of the other. Why was I frozen in place as if I’d forgotten?

  Danielle’s hand wrapped around my bicep before she gave it a squeeze. “I got you, Jack,” she whispered. “And I won’t let go until you’re comfortable, all right?”

  Our eyes locked for a long minute before I nodded, so many feelings coming from that small point of skin-on-skin contact. The same spark that flickered when I kissed her hand a couple of nights ago was back, but this burned much brighter. So bright, I forgot my initial trepidation and kept in step with her outside, albeit much slower.

  “This actually isn’t terrible,” I admitted, taking in all the trees and grass my sister pointed out upon my arrival. When I did venture outside, I never went too far past the door. The simple act of walking with minimal help on a beautiful sunny day seemed like a luxury—a luxury I took for granted before today.

  “How does it feel?” Danielle’s breath fanned my neck, and having her this close made my eyes flutter like a goddamn teenage girl.

  “Good. We can keep going,” I choked out.

  She smiled and kept a slow gait beside me.

  “You know what this reminds me of?” I laughed, feeling Danielle’s perplexed stare. “Do you remember that hike your stepdad took us on? I think we were about sixteen, and you were, what fourteen, right?”

  “Ugh,” she groaned. “I remember that. He loved hikes. And of course, both of my brothers’ best friends had to see me take a spill over a branch. Shake it off, he told me,” she mimicked with a sneer before her eyes darted back to the ground. “My ankle killed me that whole day.”

  “Kyle and Dylan ran far ahead and started climbing shit, but we stayed behind and trudged our way out of the woods, remember?”

  Danielle stopped walking, her eyes wide. “How … you remember that?”

  “Sure. We let those morons run ahead as we took the slow, scenic route out. Kind of like now.”

  Danielle dropped her hand from my arm and searched my gaze as if she was seeing me for the first time. “I remember how we were running and making jokes just like they were until I fell. I felt terrible that you stayed back with me.”

  “It was okay,” I whispered. “But I didn’t want to leave you behind if you were hurt, or make you feel even worse. And in going slow, we didn’t miss the details they did. Remember that weird fish in the pond that looked like it had three eyes?” I laughed until I noticed the pain across her features.

  “That meant a lot to me. Kyle offered to stay behind with me, but I was too embarrassed to tell him yes. When you asked me to walk with you …” She trailed off and sucked in a quick breath. “Amazing what you remember from a decade ago, right?” A sad but nervous laugh flew out of her mouth. “I don’t think I ever said thank you.” Her voice was so small, barely audible.

  “You didn’t have to thank me. I had fun that day; I just felt bad because you were hurting. Now,” I jutted out my arm. “Take me on the rest of this tour.”

  A bashful smile curved her lips before she slid her arm through mine.

  “I knew you were ready to lose the crutch. As much of a relentless pain in the ass you are, sometimes you need a push.”

  I wished I could wrap my arm around her, but I didn’t want to spook her or fall over. “I always do what you say.”

  “Because you know I’m always right.” She clicked her tongue against her teeth.

  Why was that sexy to me? “Right in therapy. Sports teams, eh.” I cracked up at her vicious scowl. “I never got to ask, Jets or Giants?”

  “Neither. Buffalo Bills,” she scoffed. “The only real New York football team.”

  “Are you serious right now? There are two New York teams.”

  “Who play in New Jersey. I’m big on semantics.”

  “Don’t I know it,” I rasped when our gazes stumbled together again. We arrived at the back entrance, the sun beating on both of us, but it wasn’t the cause of the sweat on my brow.

  My head knew I was lonely, displaced, and on the rebound. The rest of me just wanted Danielle, no matter how it complicated things. What I felt for her wasn’t fleeting or out of desperation. As much as I didn’t understand it, I couldn’t deny it.

  “That’s our whole session.” Danielle dropped my arm and beamed at me. Her pride always gave me goose bumps and made me work that much harder. “Try one crutch when you can, when you feel comfortable. You did great! The end is in sight, Taylor.” She tapped my arm and headed back inside.

  The end is in sight.

  What if I didn’t want it to be?

  16

  Jack

  “Jack!” My little sister squealed as she accosted me with a hug. Thankfully, using only one crutch allowed me to catch her with my other hand.

  “Easy, PJ. You’ll knock peg leg right over,” Dylan teased behind her.

  “I’m glad you guys came.” I ambled over to Dylan for a quick guy hug. My parents came every other week, but this was the first time I’d seen my best friend or my sister since I’d first checked in. I still wasn’t the same as I was before the fall, but at least, I wasn’t the angry asshole I’d become right after. I had a shit ton of work to do before I was even close to how I was before the accident, but it felt good to be able to walk almost unassisted. When PJ texted me upon their arrival, I left my room and met them outside.

  “You look so good, Jack.” PJ’s squeaky voice croaked as she hugged my arm. “You’re walking great.” Her sweet smile twisted my gut with guilt. Even though she drove me nuts at times, I adored my sister and hated how I’d treated her and my whole family like shit after the accident.

  “Getting there.” I slid my arm around her shoulders. “I have a long way to go, but if I stick at it maybe I can go back to work in a few months.” Or I can figure out what the hell else to do with my life. Here, I measured life by the tiny accomplishments I gathered each day. Thinking about life back at home gave me an uneasy, empty feeling. “There’s a bench over there; we can make the candy exchange then.” I winked at her and drew her into my side as we strode to the metal bench.

  “Four bags of peanut butter M&Ms, kind of an odd request.” She dropped a plastic bag into my lap after the three of us sat down.

  “It’s for a friend.” I shrugged as I grabbed the plastic bag from her hand.

  “For your therapist?” Dylan’s brows shot up as he drew back on the bench. “On your feet and back in the game? Congrats, bro.”

  “You’re dating your physical therapist? Are you, like, supposed to do that?” PJ grimaced as she leaned back.

  “I’m not dating her, Peege, but I like her. She’s beautiful and tough, and we see each other outside therapy, too. Nothing’s happened yet, so let’s just leave it at that.”

  Her lips twitched as she nudged my side. “I love that you’re back in the game, too. Fucking Marina.”

  I laughed and slid my arm behind her. “Easy, killer. You do
n’t have to keep hating on her, baby sister.”

  “Um, yeah I do. You know she had the nerve to come to the house after—”

  “Yes, I know.” I quirked a brow. “I heard the whole thing. And after you threatened to tear her apart limb by limb and threw her out, I doubt she’ll ever come back.”

  PJ cringed before she leaned forward. “You heard all of that?”

  “I think the whole block heard all of that.” I leaned over to kiss her temple. “I’m supposed to be your protector, remember? Now that I’m almost on my feet, you can stand down.”

  PJ and Dylan shared a cursory but tense glance after my sister stiffened in her seat. Maybe she told Dylan the secret my parents kept trying to drag out of me?

  “Hey, Jack.” Jake Kinney came up to the bench on a similar solo crutch as the one I hobbled around on. He had the same issue as I did, but in spades. I was a firefighter with a few years on the job, but he was a pro-football quarterback in his prime with his entire career at stake. The life-ending feeling my injury gave me was most likely tripled in his case.

  I caught Dylan’s saucer-wide eyes in my periphery and held in a laugh. I’d been too pissed off about my own life upon my arrival to be star-struck by Jake, and when we got to talking one day, we were just two guys learning how to walk. In our group sessions, the playing field leveled out quite a bit.

  “How’s it going, Jake? This is my sister PJ and my best friend, Dylan.”

  “Well, nice to meet you.” Jake extended his hand to them both, but smiled much wider for my sister.

  “That play at the super bowl last year,” Dylan gushed. “Fucking amazing, man. I bet they miss you this season.”